• Published 16th Sep 2011
  • 14,564 Views, 1,179 Comments

Under The Northern Lights - CoastalSarv



Luna and Twilight travel to the northern land of the reindeer on a diplomatic mission

  • ...
11
 1,179
 14,564

Five

”See, like a thousand years ago or something, Aslak was king of Poatsula, that's what we call this country," Vigg said. "It was so long ago that when Sarvvik grew to a hundred huts, it made it enormous. Everyone liked Aslak because he was totally awesome, but there was two problems. First, none of his vajas could give him a kid. That wasn't big, because the next king here isn't automatically there oldest kid like in some countries. Countries where rulers die, I mean, unlike yours.”

Vigg took a swig of the horrible brown thing that was served to drink. Spike guessed it was made from lichen. All food at the party seemed to be made from lichen. And the succession laws of Equestria were extremely theoretical and sketchy, on the level with the plans the army was rumored to have if the Filly Scouts ever planned a hostile takeover.

”So who becomes king then?” he asked.

The reindeer wiped his muzzle. ”The king names someone his heir,” he said.

”Who?” said Spike.

”Anydeer he wants," said Vigg. "Its almost always one of their kids, and if not some family member. They don't even have to be reindeer. And they might not become king anyway.”

Spike looked curious, being used to more autocratic rulers.

”See, if enough bigwigs says no when its time for the heir to be king, they can suggest someone else," Vigg said. "Its all politics and it usually happens when no one likes the king – or the heir – or when no one knows who it is. Its kinda complex, it doesn't matter for the story other than the heir of the king has to be someone other reindeer likes or it will all go south”

”The second fault of Aslak was that he had a brother called Wiglek," Vigg continued. "He was a really bad reindeer, an oath-breaker and a secret murderer, and since everyone who was against him had hideous luck they said he had cursed them, and that he has made a pact with Äitsi or something.”

”Wait a bit," said Spike. "What's a 'secret' murderer? Don't you try to keep a murder secret anyway? And who's Äitsi? Am I supposed to know who it is?”

”OK, it's like this: when this happened, killing someone wasn't wrong," Vigg said. "Well, it was wrong, but not in the same way as today. Your herd should protect you even if you had killed someone from another herd – but only if you admitted it. Like, he grazed on my grounds or looked at my sister or said nasty things about me, so I killed him, what're you going to do about it?”

”That's... awful,” said a stunned Spike.

”Yeah, my ancestors weren't always nice, OK?" said Vigg. "But secret murder, it is if you kill someone and don't tell anyone. Or lie and say it wasn't me, or even worse, it wasn't me, it was him over there. Wiglek had done that, and that meant his herd shouldn't protect him, they should help getting him get punished, like any crime today. But Aslak liked him anyway so he stopped them.”

”OK. I can see why doing that wasn't popular," said Spike. "But who's Äitsi?”

”Uhm...” Vigg leaned closer to Spike and actually looked a little scared. ”You Equestrians met him last year. I believe you call him Discord.”

Spike was frozen a moment.

”Oh, you must have felt that too!” Spike said with concern.

Vigg grinned sadly. ”Why shouldn't we? Although the news said it was worse for you, it hard to miss when the sun starts to rise and set every minute or so!”

”It rained chocolate milk...” said Spike.

”It rained peaches here,” Vigg said anxiously.

”Peaches?” said Spike.

”Canned peaches," Vigg clarified. "Lot of reindeer I know got concussions.”

”Oh,” said Spike.

”And then the peaches turned out to be poisonous – except the singing ones – but you could eat the cans,” Vigg said.

”Yeah, that was Discord's takeover," said Spike. "But, he cannot have taught Wugluk -”

”Wiglek!” Vigg corrected him.

”- Wiglek evil stuff," said Spike. "I mean how long ago was this?”

”A thousand years, maybe?” said Vigg.

”Discord was turned to stone at the dawn of time or something,” Spike said.

”This is mythology, OK?" said Vigg. "It doesn't come with a time line like modern stuff. Can I continue?”

”Sure...” said Spike.

”Well, Wiglek had a kid, and he was called Sampo," said Vigg. "Later, that is – he had another name first that the deer who wrote my history books fight over what it was, but just say he's Sampo from the start.”

”Wait, in the comics Wiglek is his uncle and Aslak his father!" said Spike. "And they changed their names!”

”Yeah, I can see why they changed that," said Vigg. "You always have the evil uncle in stories but not here.”

”OK, sure," said a dismayed Spike.

”Now Wiglek tried to make Aslak name Sampo as heir, but Aslak said no, because they would never accept Wiglek's son as heir because he was such a piece of manure," said Vigg. "Then something horrible happened which changed that.” Vigg got more of the brown swill-thing.

”There was this great famine," Vigg continued. "The winter got worse and raids from winter monsters got worse and there was, like, no food, not even lichen. You know about winter monsters from that comic, right?”

Spike nodded.

”So Wiglek turns up and says to Aslak: 'Look, I can save everyone, I know just the thing. But if we succeed you must make Sampo your heir and prince of Poatsula.' And it was not like he could said no, deer had nothing to eat and there was fighting everywhere and all was terrible,” Vigg said.

”So what did they do?” said Spike.

”Well, according to my history teacher, nodeer knows," said Vigg. "Really. There are like a million bazillion folktales of what Wiglek and Sampo did, but no one can say which of them are true, only which are made up because they obviously mentions modern things that weren't around then. But they came back with something called the Sampo. That's why reindeer called him Sampo, he brought them Sampo.”

”And what was it?” said Spike.

”Well, the usual story was that it was a magical artifact – artifact is a word meaning magic thingamajig –” said Vigg.

”I know, I'm assistant to a sorceress!” said Spike.

”Sorry," said Vigg. "A magical artifact that could stop the famine; by creating food, say, or maybe remove the winter. But some says it was an idea, or a spell, or a person. Or a non-magical thing, like the first mill ever.”

”Mill? Like a windmill?” said Spike.

”No, like a hoof-mill," said Vigg. "It's like a wheel with a handle and you turn it with your hoof. It looks like a spiral, and there are a lots of spiral pics with old carvings of Sampo. So, the usual story is that it was a mill, and when you turn it you got meal even if you didn't put any grain in it.”

Spike frowned. ”Well, Twilight says you cannot make something out of nothing. That lasts, anyway.”

Vigg shrugged. ”Don't ask me, I'm not a magician. Not even reindeer sorcerers know. It's lost. Because while it stopped the famine it turned out to be a bad thing.”

”Well, I was sorta expecting that. That story was going too well” said Spike.

”See, everyone wanted the Sampo," said Vigg. "Like everyone who know it existed. Other reindeer tribes, the Russ ponies, urox and skolls and stalus...”

”Whoa, back the tape. Urox?” said Spike.

”They're like cattle, they are almost gone," said Vigg. "Most of 'em emigrated to Equestria centuries ago.”

”Skolls?” said Spike.

”Those are the Ice-Wargs of your comic there. Wolf-people,” said Vigg.

”Ah, OK," said Spike. "Stalus? There is a giant in the Sampo comic called Stallo.”

”Yeah, but in real life they are... or were... more like ogres," said Vigg. "Or what do you call that myth, Bighoof? Anyway, newer versions of the story which probably aren't true says the whole world attacked the kingdom, including 'seven sorcerer-princes from Hestaland' – and that's Equestria.”

”So they swapped famine for war. Nice. Magical artifacts are just trouble, it seems,” said Spike.

”In stories, at least," said Vigg. "Anyway, Sampo took Sampo, and he used it and him as bait. He traveled up to Joukulvakt – that's the Everfrost Glacier – and the foreign armies followed him. And they... all got lost or killed or something up there. They just disappeared, and their people got so dismayed that they stopped bothering us. Wiglek got lost on the way somehow. The herds chose someone else as a king. And that's it.”

Spike looked clearly disappointed. ”What about his magic spear?”

”That's made up," said Vigg dismissively. "Oh, there is a spear in the story too, but that's made up. That spear is a spear-staff, which you use with skis, not just as a weapon, by the way. All reindeer have one. Well, we who are still doing the reindeer thing ”

Vigg vaguely waved his hoof in a way indicating forest and tundra and snow and lichen and continued: ”And since he was a king he could probably have gotten a magical one, but no one knows and if he had it is lost on top of Joukulvakt.”

”What about the king's spear, I saw that?” said Spike.

”Well that is a magic spear, and they say it was Sampo's, but it isn't," said Vigg. "It's a modern magic spear. It's like those Neighponese swords you can buy on postal order, they aren't real original katanas. Some king just had one made to show off.”

Vigg looked like he deeply disagreed with showing off with fake cutlery, and Spike decided to not mention the things he had bought on postal order with his allowance.

”I wrote about that in this long paper, and it was awesome," said Vigg. "And I only got a B-! Stupid teachers! Why should you work hard when you aren't rewarded! You know how it is, right?”

Spike tactfully avoided mentioning he was, in a way, home schooled, and made sympathetic noises. He could at least honestly sympathize with people not recognizing your talents.

”So what do you do when you're not in school?” Spike changed the subject.

”It seems like it's all I do... but, well, sport," said Vigg. "And hiking. Daddy was from the grazers so he wanted me to know stuff. I get out as often as I can.”

He turned to Spike. ”I can show you some stuff if you have time later.” Spike nodded and ensured that it would be nice, if he didn't have too much work to do. Vigg seemed impressed and jealous that someone younger than him did ”actual work” as he phrased it.

”It would be awesome to be grownup and get to actually do a real job instead of all this studying!” he groaned.

”So... what are you going to do when you grow up?” Spike asked. Vigg cleared his throat.


Thanks to krdragon for post-publishing proofreading!