oh......Oh my gawd....Carmine...You have truly broken my heart this time. you Stuck a arrow in my soft spot for twilight. I dont know if i can continue onward...This was Sadder than the last party....and it thought that was sad... I just wanna cry....MUST. HOLD. IN. TEARS.

Yep........ depressed again

Carmine, this is even sadder than The Last Party!!!!! Your blog, it lies

>>165796165796

How is it even sadder? I've just explained the plot. It doesn't start to really get sad until the end, it's supposed to be a sort of bittersweet happiness until then!

;-; i need a hug now...Damnit Carmine. Y U ALWAYS MAKIN ME SAD?

>>165822165822

Ok, maybe I'm over-reacting...... but it just came off starting similar to The Magic Never Fades Away, which made me remember said fic and made me sad again. Last Party we see the events that led up to the climax, but this story will go into the painful aftermath, which always hit me hard.

Oh well, looking forward to another epic story

Oh dear... Now that is rather sad. I'm very curious to see where this will go. Very nicely written prologue; I look forward to reading more.

>>165937165937 Don't worry, chapter 1 will be all touchy and stuff whenever I get around to writing it. It's going to have a twist ending that'll leave you all happy and stuff.

holy giant paragraphs of text, batman

This isnt the saddest part? I'm allergic to manly tears and I had to slap myself to stop from shedding them. I really thought you should have mixed this with The Last Party to make it so Pinkie didn't die the same way all her friends did.

This is definitely well written grammar-wise. I do like the story, but some of the descriptions of the characters' niches after they were gone were a bit almost slap-stick in my opinion. A horde of bunnies attacking the town without fluttershy? It seems facetious to me. The whole town lost the ability to party because Pinkie Pie wasn't there? I know what you are trying to do, but I hope your next chapter isn't so scientific.

Good Lord... wow, this is awesome, and yet so sad. Tracked, and when finished, Favorited.

This is depressing.....WI-FIVE

If this is as sad as everyone says, perhaps I'll have to do a cold reading once it's complete. But that means I wouldn't be able to read it for a while. Oh, the decisions!

Well. This is depressing.

But good nonetheless, looking forward to more chapters.

Efficient, evocative language.  Great grammar, always love to see that!   This story is so damn sad, too, by the way, because Twilight is so alone.  I would think she'd still have Spike, and he would share her loss.  Sweetie Belle should probably live at the Library before she goes into foster care, assuming her parents aren't around.  Twilight sort of knows how to be a mom since she helped "raise" Spike.  I could see Twilight befriending Apple Bloom too, in much the same type of relationship she had with Applejack.  The Apple mares are all quite clever, and Twilight respects that.  Anyway, Twilight still has friends, and they need her now more than ever.

Oh, this was so sad...

Well, anyway, I loved the way you wrote this and the way you describe things.

Tracked and looking forward to the first chapter.

can't wait till next chapter

Beautiful.

Is this by any chance based off of Mitch Albom's book For One More Day? The synopsis sounds very similar, not that I mind

>>167671167671 Never heard about it, so I can't really tell.

>>167674167674

Oh, very well...

I was just curious since I did a story based on another one of his books. He writes really good stories.

As far as grammar goes, you do a very good job. I do have a couple of suggestions:

"She took a red rose out and laid it in front of the tombstone, on top of the pile of other, either dead or waning, flowers."

I'm not a floriographist, but I think there are other flowers that represent death and grief better than a rose. Lily, perhaps?

"She took out a white lily and gently placed it on top of the pile of dead or dying flowers that were already lying in front of the tombstone."

Other than that, You did an excellent job. I would like to help edit!

Five stars for you.

Wow. Preety sad...

What happened to Rarity and Sweetie's parents?

>>167800167800 They were shown in 1 episode for like, 3 minutes. I'd like to think that they are currently vacationing somewhere far away from civilization.

A very promising premise. I can imagine what possibilities this story might hold in store. For captivating my interest, here's another watch. :)

I like it, short sweet and to the point. Hope to see more soon

Eh, could use more paragraph separation.

Good start though.

I think manly tears are going to be shed in upcoming chapters . Noticed one slight continuity error: Sweetie Belle doesn't live with Rarity, she lives with her parents, as seen in Sisterhooves Social. Nothing really important, though. Good job!

Sigh... Another fan-fiction that leaves me with the mindset of hating the writer to death, strictly due to the emotional gravity of it... (That's a good thing.)

Good stuff. There are a few spots here and there that would benefit from better word-choice, but the prologue has done its job and pulled in another reader. Petty little grammatical issues can be corrected later, the story looks like it will hold up well regardless.

Looks like Twilight needs a deal...

Good so far. I'll track.

Wow this stors well done I cant wait to see the next chapter of it. And poor girl I hope the others at least died fast.

>>166887166887

YAAAAAAY

-emos in the corner from reading the sadfic sobsobsob the prologue is saaaaaad-

I SHALL NOT READ THIS its going to be depressing

WWWWHHHYYYY WHY YOU MAKE TWILIGHT SO LONELYAND SAD and you destroyed the crusaders

amazing and truly sad. keep going!!

and you say this will only get more sad......

Interesting so far. I look forward to reading more.

I really like it so far, well written and no mistakes

The only real criticism I can give is you're telling sometimes instead of showing. Such as when Twilight is reflecting on the loss of her friends, I think a flashback would have added more depth to the story.

Other then that though, a really great start!

its already sad even ho its the prologue!

Ever since Fluttershy died

That line sends chills up my spine just thinking about it.

this may be sad, but its nowhere compared to My Little Dashie.

If you can make it sadder than My Little Dashie, you win all my Internets(and a tub of tears)  

>>168568168568 I would've done the flashback, but I didn't want to add a dark tag to this fic, which is why I only briefly mentioned how they died. Leave it to the readers sick minds to picture how it happened.

>>168572168572 This isn't even sad yet. It's actually supposed to be a generally cheery fic with a short little sad ending, not trying to best MLD here, although I may be able to if I really wanted... Ideas, ideas, ideas.

Jeez Carmine. I wonder why your not on EqD Yet... Y U SO UNRECOGNIZED?!

What ever you do don't listen to taps(the military funeral song) while read this. Sure they together great but well it is not a good idea. And you sad it is going to get sadder in a way!? Tracking

Fewf! I know this isn't complete yet, but I'm glad it wasn't as emotionally impacting as Last Party (so far at least)

You've really got a way with writing, Carmine.

>>168713168713 You're too kind.

I'm sorry but this is to sad for me but I will still give 5 stars

Oh my this is good.

... /sob/

After reading Growing Up, I dont find anything sad anymore isnt that sad