A Grand Day Out
“-and here is the rest of your embers-cursed money,” Gallus said as he threw a small pouch of bits across the table at breakfast. A week had passed since his first successful job and he had taken several others since. There had been a couple mistakes in a few of them, ponies didn't seem to appreciate a good drinking song for some reason, but other than that his performances were met with vigorous approval. “I still don’t see why I couldn’t pay you in realm coin. As far as I can tell they are made from the same metals.”
“It’s the principal of the thing,” Damien replied as he tucked the pouch into his satchel.
“And that principal is?”
“It mainly means that I would have to either melt the coins down or sell them as oddities. That could get me more or less money that you just giving me bits.” A corner of his beak quirked upwards slightly as he added, “it also forced you to actually get a job instead of sitting around doing nothing all day, not that you don’t do that enough anyway.”
“I do work! It just isn’t quite as… plentiful as it could be,” the unicorn muttered. “Not that you actually do anything!”
“Alas mine fated foe, it is because I am retired. I believe I have acquainted you with the term. In fact I believe I have done so several dozen times over the last week. Would you like me to get the dictionary out again?”
Gallus glared at Damien and shook his head. The last time Damien had gotten out the ‘dictionary’ he had forced Gallus to read the entire thing. Unfortunately it seemed to be a specially made edition that only contained the word 'retired' and its definition for nearly three thousand pages. And the psychopath had sat down and made sure that Gallus had read every page. Every. Damned. Page.
Gallus sighed in defeat and turned his attention towards the simple vegetarian meal in front of him. His lips curled in distaste as he heaved yet another sigh. “Can you at least do something about whatever it is that keeps me from eating meat?”
Damien barked a short laugh and made a show of taking a large bite out of the venison sausage on his plate. “Perhaps. I haven’t studied it much but it seems to have something to do with your magic. Some sort of species wide geas. Possibly set in place to prevent ponies from using their abilities to harm others. Any species with such powerful inborn magic would either have to be very pacifistic, rule the entire world, or have killed themselves off long ago” He tapped a claw against his beak thoughtfully. “That would partially explain why this world is so peaceful,” he mused. “The rest is likely a defense mechanism against creatures such as windigos and Draconequii but that is neither here nor there.”
“I don’t care what it is so long as it can be removed! I miss eating steak!”
“You’ll have to make do without I’m afraid, cows here are sentient and killing them would be murder.”
“Because you’ve always had such problems with murder in the past,” Gallus muttered under his breath.
“What was that?”
“Nothing, just grumbling about eating vegetables for breakfast. Again.”
“There are fruits there too,” Damien pointed out, a sickeningly sweet smile on his beak. The smile only grew when Gallus shot a venomous look over towards him. “I suppose I could try to do something about the geas that prevents you from eating meat but from what I can tell it is tied into your very ability to use magic. Take that away in a normal unicorn and it would remove the ability to use magic. In your case? I don’t know. You might be able to keep using your magic due to your previous abilities or it might completely sever them.”
Gallus looked longingly at the sausage on Damien’s plate before shaking his head with a pained look. “Dealing with this body is bad enough with my magic. I don’t think I would be able to stand having to use my mouth for carrying things if something went wrong.” He grimaced as he returned to his meal.
Damien frowned slightly at this. "Another chance at learning down the drain," he muttered with a glower. That and he was responsible for acclimating the ex-hero to Equestria and he doubted that acclimation meant wallowing in self-pity. Besides, he reasoned, there was always fun to be had trying to get Gallus used to the ponies. A fond smile twitched across his beak as he recalled the time he had, with the help of the Crusaders, taught Gallus about the Everfree forest and the creatures inside. That manticore was almost certainly still walking with a limp.
His fond reminiscences were interrupted when the front door opened and Gilda entered the house with a surprisingly happy look on her face. “You seem to be in a good mood,” he observed as she headed over to the refrigerator and began rustling through the leftovers.
Gilda jumped slightly when she heard Damien’s voice. “Not really,” she said in a carefully neutral voice. “Just glad we didn’t have much do today. Most ponies prefer giving their Hearts and Hooves cards personally and not by mail. I was expecting today to be a lot busier.”
Damien’s eyes brightened at the mention of Hearts and Hooves day. “That’s today?” A sly smile crossed his beak. “Would your happiness have anything to do with possibly finding a date for this most auspicious holiday?”
Gilda glared at him for a few moments before replying. “No.”
“Yet I seem to recall you making plans with a certain unicorn for today.”
“Twilight just needs help reorganizing the library. She figures that all those dweebs out there will be too busy sucking face to come in and it would be the perfect time to do it.”
“As you say my dear, as you say,” Damien replied as Gilda began to tear into a plate of cold deer steak. “So I suppose you don’t want to help me get ‘Blueflame’ here to understand how Equestrian holidays work?”
“No,” Gilda replied immediately. Her wing still ached from the last time she had helped with Gallus’ acclimation.
”I don’t suppose I get any say in this do I?” Gallus asked.
“Of course not!” Damien exclaimed. “Now we must get ready for your education my friend. If things go well we shall have a long day ahead of us!”
<=[XXXXX]=>
“As you may have guessed, today’s little soiree has to do with love,” Damien explained to his reluctant student, “of course that doesn’t mean it is exempt from the standard chaos that seems to permeate standard pony life. I was actually lucky enough to be watching this world when this particular holiday rolled around. Since, as you may have noticed, the gender ratio is a little unbalanced and competition can be quite stiff around this time of year. Most of the stallions around town would be hard pressed to not spend a little time with a mare or two.”
“Even that one?” Gallus asked as he saw a strange looking stallion reclining in a jar of jelly.
“I said most stallions,” Damien replied as he rolled his eyes. He smiled as he gave Gallus a sidelong look. “And you, my dear student, happen to be a stallion.”
Gallus looked at him in confusion for a moment as Damien’s words slowly worked though his mind. “No,” he said as soon as their meaning became clear. “I am not going to court a pony.”
“Really now? Well I suppose that we could always find Zecora or Gilda and you could try to court them instead,” Damien replied amicably. “Not that I would assume you’d get very far with either of them. Zecora is fine being alone and Gilda has other interests in mind. Yes, your best bet would be one of the ponies here in town,” he concluded.
“I refuse to court any non-human,” Gallus hissed back, “I don’t care if you are so willing to forsake your nature but I will remain true to myself in any way I can.” His face fell. “I have to.”
Damien sighed as he watched the warring emotions on Gallus’ face. There was no fun in needling someone in such a state. “You don’t need to fear this,” he finally said.
Gallus looked over at Damien, confusion at both the griffon’s words and his almost reassuring tone plain on his face. “What are you talking about?”
Damien rolled his eyes. “I am sure that they will not press you any further than you are willing to go. Merely make your feelings known and most of the ponies will abide by that decision. Let’s just walk through the market and see what happens shall we?”
“And why do we need to walk through the market?”
“Because there are sure to be all sorts of special offers going on today and it will be a good way to get you to spend more time outside.” He gave Gallus a flat look. “I go out and about more than you and I don’t even have a job.”
Gallus grimaced but didn’t dispute that fact. It seemed like Damien left to do something every day; whether it was visiting the library, meeting with some random pony about something, or going to the market like they were right now, he always had his claws in something. Gallus had been quite different. He may have become more accustomed to the strange new world he had found himself in, but his initial rush at the thought of finally crossing blades with Damien had long since faded. Looking back at things with the knowledge he now possessed he felt somewhat foolish about how he had acted. He, of course, was still little more than tolerant of the retired villain but he had started to see little reason to try to kill him. He had to acknowledge that it was likely due in large part to being forced to listen to the silver-tongued devil every day, but there had been several points that Gallus simply couldn’t dispute. In any case his slow acclimation had not included an increased desire to interact with the ponies, something that Damien had apparently noticed.
“Hey!”
The sudden voice disrupted Gallus’s less than fond musings and brought his scattered attention towards a pale yellow mare with bright deep green. “Yes?” he asked in slight confusion at having been called out to so suddenly.
The mare seemed to flinch away from his question. “I… ummm… You…” tried several more times to speak up but failed repeatedly.
Gallus frowned slightly as something about the mare tickled the back of his mind. “Ah! You’re Mixed Brew aren’t you? You were at… all of my performances I believe,” he said with a smile as he managed to place her appearance. She flinched again at the sound of his voice but he continued on gamely. “Is there anything you need?”
She tried several more times to speak up, barely managing a syllable each time before collapsing into inaudible whispers or, more often, complete silence.
“What are you..?” Gallus’s eyes widened slightly as he put the pieces together. A mare coming up to him on a day dedicated to romance, a mare that had, for some reason, been at every single one of his limited performances. “Flames,” he whispered as he looked at the cowering mare with new eyes. “You aren’t trying to… ask me something are you?” he asked slowly. At her nod he continued. “Something in regards to a certain holiday that is going on at this moment?” Another nod, this time accompanied by a tentative smile and wide, hopeful eyes.
Gallus ground a tired hoof against his forehead and let out a heavy sigh. “Umm, look. I’m really flattered that you would ask me but…” He looked down at Mixed Brew again and paused. Her hopeful eyes were now misting over with unshed tears and her lips were quivering with barely restrained sadness. “I… I…” Gallus’s eye twitched as the mare continued to stare into his soul. “I suppose I could spend a little time with you,” he finally said as he hung his head in defeat.
Mixed Brew let out a high-pitched squeal and flung her forelimbs around his neck. “Thank you! You won’t regret this I promise!” She drew back with a gasp. “I was so focused on asking you I forgot to figure out what we should do!” Her eyes darted back and forth in slight panic for a moment before focusing once more on Gallus. “We can go to the park! It’ll be fun!”
Gallus sighed in defeat and put on as strong a smile as he could under the circumstances. “That sounds… interesting,” he said with a mental wince.
“So you either aren’t all that opposed to courtship or you really can’t stand up to mares. Good to know.”
Gallus sighed and didn’t bother turning around. “What do you want Damien?”
“I could give you a list if you're interested, but I find that unlikely.” Damien turned to look at Mixed Brew. “Ah, Ms. Brew. Good to see you again. I don’t suppose my order is ready quite yet?”
The mare shook her head with a slight frown. “I’ve been a little busy recently,” she admitted. “And some of the ingredients have been really hard to get a hold of.”
Gallus looked between the two in shock. “You two know each other?”
Damien snorted and shot him a condescending look. “I am at least acquainted with everyone in town. Ms. Brew happens to sell some very good blends of tea and I have found them to be far superior to mine.” He looked down in thought for a moment. “I believe that her cutie mark influences the tea in some way but I have yet to discern how.”
Before Damien could go off on another one of his tangents about his ongoing cutie mark research, Mixed Brew decided to speak up. “He’s actually the one that suggested I see you perform.”
Gallus’s ears perked up and immediately lay back as he turned towards Damien, fire in his eyes.
“Hey! She mentioned that she liked music, you were going to be playing, and I figured it might do you good to get more ponies interested in you,” Damien said as he back away slightly.
“And this was out of the goodness of your heart?”
“Gates no! If you were to succeed you would be able to pay me. I just wanted you to make enough money for me to be able to take it!”
Gallus glared at Damien but slowly nodded in acceptance of his reasoning. Besides, he doubted that even Damien would be able to find any way to profit off of a mare showing interest in him. “Then I suppose my lessons for the day with you are complete?”
“Of course. I believe you’re going to learn a good deal with her than you would with me after all." He paused and looked pensive for a moment. “Unless you swing that way of course. Nothing wrong with that, but I limit my affections to those of the fairer sex.”
Gallus glared at Damien but didn’t rise to the bait. He had already learned that there was nothing to be gained from trying to meet Damien in open combat unless you knew you held the advantage. While Gallus may not have any intention of pursuing an actual relationship with any pony, he just couldn't bring himself to completely shatter the poor mare's heart.
He sighed and suppressed a wince as he realized that he might just be making the inevitable let down even worse for her when he did have to deny her advances. Unfortunately that line of thought was quickly and efficiently struck down by the still fresh image of the mare about to burst into tears. "So... shall we?" he asked Mixed Brew as he nodded in the general direction of the park.
"Of course!" Brew replied with a joyous grin.
Damien watched them walk off and sighed. "Well. There goes my entertainment for the day. Maybe the Crusaders are doing something fun and potentially dangerous." He paused as he thought over what he had said. "Scratch that, maybe they're doing something fun."
<=[XXXXX]=>
Gallus couldn't recall the last time he had been in such an uncomfortable position. Sure there had been that time when he had almost been caught in the barn with Mira, but at least she hadn't guilted him into that. His eyes flicked down towards the mare at his side and he grimaced slightly. It felt wrong leading her on like this, but it was what she wanted, wasn't it?
As his habitually poor luck would have it Mixed Brew chose this time to ask him a question.
"-so what do you think?"
Gallus looked at her blankly and smiled weakly. "I'm sorry, I was... distracted," he confessed.
She sighed and looked at the ground at her hooves. "I thought so. You aren't paying any attention to me at all are you?"
He winced but didn't deny it. "I'm sorry. This is... new to me."
"What? Hearts and Hooves Day? Going on a date? Spending quality time with a mare?"
"Would you believe yes to all three?"
That stopped Mixed Brew in her tracks. "Really? You haven't... Oh Celestia you're gay aren't you?"
"What? No! I'm just-! I mean-!" Gallus groaned and began wishing there was something to slam his head against repeatedly. "It's complicated. Just... really complicated. I don't even know how long I'm going to be here and I'm not used to dealing with..." He waved a hoof vaguely around at the town in general.
One of Brew's eyebrows crept upwards as she tried to puzzle out what he could mean.
When he saw that she wasn't making any progress understanding things his head drooped with a sigh. "Look, I'm not looking for... romance right now. I'm more than willing to spend time with you, more than willing to be your friend, but don't expect anything more from me. It wouldn't be fair to you."
Mixed Brew sighed and looked around the park at all the happy couples. "If you say so. But you will let me at least try to change your mind, won't you?" When Gallus nodded his tentative approval she smiled and pressed slightly closer to his side.
Their date continued for nearly an hour with little to no progress as Mixed Brew tried everything she could think of to warm him up to her, only to meet hesitance, silence, or, at best, a few simple words that quickly faded into awkward silence. They had taken up a spot underneath a tree, stewing in increasingly uncomfortable silence, when a much needed distraction appeared in the form of a familiar griffon tumbling out of the tree and landing on top of Gallus.
"Damien?! Were you following me?!" Gallus cried out indignantly as he wormed his way out from under his landlord.
Damien quickly scrambled to his feet and clamped a claw around Gallus' muzzle. "Be silent you fool! She might hear you!" His eyes darted back and forth as though searching for something before he relaxed infinitesimally.
Gallus' horn glowed as he wrenched Damien's claw from his muzzle and gave him an acidic glare. "What are you talking about?"
"Pinkie Pie! She's been stalking me ever since she took a drink of that punch the Crusaders made! Have you ever tried escaping from Pinkie Pie? It's almost impossible!" He glanced around the park again and turned his attention to Mixed Brew. "You explain it to him."
Brew looked at Damien and rolled her eyes before turning back towards Gallus. "Like he said, it's almost impossible to get away from Pinkie Pie. Not even Rainbow Dash was able to outrun her, and she's able to break the sound barrier at will." She turned back to Damien. "Why is she chasing you anyway? You didn't break a Pinkie Promise did you?"
"Damien looked mortified. "Of course not! Do I look suicidal?! No, I think there was some sort of love potion in that punch, I saw Big Mac and Cheerlilee acting the way Pinkie was earlier while the Crusaders followed them around. I just need to corner the Crusaders and figure out what was in the punch."
Gallus' eye twitched slightly as he looked back towards Mixed Brew for an explanation.
"A Pinkie Promise is something Pinkie Pie came up with. According to her breaking that kind of promise is the fastest way to lose a friend-"
Damien's eyes widened in terror and he motioned for Brew to shut up.
"FOREVER!" Pinkie cried out as she popped out of Damien's satchel. She looked around, taking in Gallus' dropped jaw, Mixed Brew's embarrassed facehoof, and Damien's look of pure terror. "Fluffy-poo!" she cried as she jumped the rest of the way out of the satchel and threw her arms around Damien's neck. "Why did you run away? Can't you see how much I love you?"
Gallus watched in stunned silence as Damien, the usurper and monster he had been told stories about all his life, struggled in vain against the pink pony who, quite literally, had hearts in her eyes.
Seeing that he wasn't going to escape with brute strength alone Damien pointed off in a random direction. "Look! A distraction!"
"Really?! Where? Where? Everypony always points them out to me but I never manage to see them!" Pinkie said as she turned to look where Damien had pointed.
Without missing a beat Damien pulled a glowing gemstone out of his satchel and barked a few harsh words before vanishing in a pulse of darkness; leaving the three ponies to stare at the spot he had so recently vacated.
"Oh ho ho, mi amor. You cannot run away from ze love!" Pinkie said in a prance accent before she bounced away, presumably in pursuit of Damien.
"That was... odd," Gallus finally said, still staring in the direction Pinkie had gone. "Do things like this happen often around here or is it just a side effect of Damien?"
Mixed Brew smiled weakly. "This actually wasn't too weird," she admitted. She couldn't help but giggle at the incredulous look on Gallus' face. "In the last year we've had a dragon grow bigger than a building and ransack the town, a couple ponies acted like super-heroes for a while, one of the princesses visited the town, our librarian drove the entire town insane with a spell, and we had an immortal spirit of chaos and disharmony declare our town the 'Chaos Capitol of the World'. Pinkie chasing someone around because of a love potion barely even registers as weird." She paused for a moment. "Although almost anything weird involving Pinkie Pie gets ignored as 'normal' for her."
"That's... insane. The princess’s visit doesn't sound too bad-"
"She terrified everypony, almost canceled a holiday we've celebrated for a thousand years, and since she had been on the moon for a thousand years she had no idea how to interact with anypony," Brew interjected.
"Right," Gallus said after a moment. "Why do you live here again?" he asked with a slight smile.
Brew chuckled at his smile and cuffed him on the back of the head with a hoof. "There are plenty of reasons to live here," she said, jumping on the first subject they had hit on that hadn't ended with self-conscious silence.
<=[XXXXX]=>
Gallus walked into the house with a small smile on his face that grew into a grin when he saw Damien.
"What do you want?" Damien growled as he fished a piece of confetti out of his feathers that matched nearly a thousand other pieces of paper that were stuck to his body. Stuck to his forehead was a large red heart with Pinkie's smiling face emblazoned on it and several other similar objects were plastered to other sections of his body.
"Just enjoying the fact that despite your best efforts you are not invincible," Gallus replied.
"She's Pinkie Pie, she doesn't count," Damien growled. "And there's no way I would have been able to get away with more... decisive actions than running away. But enough about me, how did your date go?"
Gallus ignored the jab, something he found much easier to do with his aggressor covered in paper hearts, and continued to smile. "I did have a good time in the end. I also managed to convince her that it would be pointless to pursue me and that it would be best if we remained friends."
"Yes, because individuals of any species or gender are always reasonable when it comes to matters of the heart, even when they aren't under the influence of a love potion." He peeled a paper heart off his side and winced as several hairs followed it off.
"No, I was quite clear about everything and she was very accepting of it all. It's all over and we're just friends."
"I see. And are you two planning to meet up again anytime in the future to spend some time together as friends?"
"Well yes, we're going to be meeting up at the end of the week for a meal so she can tell me a little more about some of the more exciting things she has seen in Ponyville." Gallus blinked and his eyes suddenly widened as he realized what he had said.
"I may not be the most knowledgeable individual regarding the local customs for courtship but that certainly sounds like what the locals would call a 'date'. Don't you agree?" Damien couldn't help but laugh as he watched Gallus storm off, a laugh that was cut off by a flash of light from the entrance to the room.
"I'm so glad Twilight gave me this," Gilda said as she lowered a camera and turned to flee from her cursing landlord.
Alrighty then. Been a while hasn't it? Between writer's block, my easily distracted nature, classes, my entry for NaNoWriMo, and more damn writer's block it has been far far too long since I put up much of anything 'round here. But hey, apparently I don't completely suck and eventually managed to get something out, even if it ain't that great.
Unfortunately for you this doesn't really mark the end of my unofficial hiatus, but the beginning of an official one. Given that the biggest reason for my writer's block was that I wasn't having quite as much fun with this story as I have in the past I'm pretty much hitting pause here and getting rid of that nagging little voice that keeps telling me that I have to write more for Retired instead of doing more with some other things I might be putting up in the near future. That does not mean that this story is dead. I still really want to get Damien to see that time travel isn't a death sentence in Equestria and there's a chapter involving Twilight, Trixie, and Gilda that I want to do at some point as well. I don't know when I'll get back into my writing groove for this story again but I assure you that when I do there won't be such massive gaps between chapters for quite a while.
So... yeah. Apologies to all an' stuff but what that's how it is. I'll see you with whatever story I put up next, probably the one with Celestia and a metool.
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Deep green what?
I think you dropped a "more"
Hoof, meet face
Metool?
I understand your reluctance, and while I'm disappointed that I won't get to read about more shenaniganry, I can't say that I would want to read something that's forced, because the quality quickly degrades and you would be tempted to kill characters off just for teh lulz.
you're alive! tears of happy~
First thought: UPDAAAATE!!! IT IS IN FEATURE BOX!!!!! Forget the important things. READ NAOW!!!
*Reading...*
Hahehehah
What?
Uh... Yep, he is screwed.
*Done reading*
Okay. That was fun.
Character Gilda has unlocked Achievement "Proofpic obtained!".
Description: Make a screenshot of one of your friends during an embarrassing situation.
that bit at the end XD
you go Gilda
Fuck yeah..
media.tumblr.com/tumblr_mcx9w9z4ot1qji387.gif
C'MERE!!
Pinkie Pie: Bane of retired Overlords everywhere... Forever.
1658172I see Wat u did thar!
Moar story nao!
Still don’t like Gallus’s continued presence in the story. Doubly so as he has apparently become the main character.
Damien’s efforts to deal with Pinkie were highly amusing however.
Am I the only one horrified at an entire species having a behaviour modification geas?
Your growing lack of interest is likely due to the lack of any overarching plot. Pure ‘Slice Of Life’ tends not to stretch very far.
Well, lets hope you actually come back, Ive seen a lot of dead story's that ended with the author saying its only a hiatus.
Just a little mistake I found
Damien has no hair does he? Would be a strange Griffon.
Holy frick! What is this!
Forged in gods very flames!
Do my eyes, tell me lies!
An RtE Chapter!
Glad to see another chapter out, definitely must be a challenge for you to keep good consistent humor going!
Great chapter, YAM.
BTW, i'm still in the process of the cover pic. Sorry it's taking so long, but life pretty much caught up to me in a BIG hurry, and piled on crap after crap of things to deal with.
I wonder how Damien would react to McKnuckles Fist Punchalot.
I smiled. Thank you. I needed to smile.
Can someone explain to me what's been going on with the quotation marks?
My lungs... they can't take it...to much laughter
1658172
//dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Pinkie_loool.png
This whole chapter was just perfect. Pinkie Pie and Damien, Brew and Blueflame, the stallion in the jelly. All of it was amazing.
this makes me happy and sad at the same time TT
Finally a update!i think I forgot the storyline though
I literally squeed when i heard this update
Yay update! Hilarious, as usual! GJ!
Good to see you and this story again, though it is sad that the wait for the next one is gonna be longer. Still it has to be done so all I can say for now is, great job so far and hope to see you again as soon as possible!
I was reading the discription and... well 2 things happened.
imageshack.us/a/img825/1226/134459562580.png
imageshack.us/a/img268/2104/9b7k.jpg
But i wont judge it yet since i have yet to read it
Wat? Am I getting shipped with a royal Alicorn? Now I'm tempted to dig out an avatar from my Bob and George days... but for the moment:
bobandgeorge.com/comics/author/archives/a062.gif
Also, sad to see that this is taking back burner, but good to see you're not trying to force it. Also good to see Damien suffering a little for once.
Also: griffins have lion back-halves, so yeah, they have hair.
Whats this? an update!?
Let's see; character...
---OP badass set to godmode? Check.
---Lawfully/Chaotically/Unlawfully Evil? Check.
---Sadistic on ALL levels? Check.
---Name relates to Satan? Check.
Let's see; story/plot...
---All possible plot holes either nonexistent or intentional? Check.
---Tropes used to max enjoyment value, using/subverting/sub-subverting them? Check.
---Complimentary sub stories/plots that blend seamlessly with established canon? Check.
Let's see; personal likes...
---The big reveal ... Om nom nom bitch. Was that even supposed to be a climax? Who cares? Run it over with a 4x4! KICKASS!
---Discording him ... Discord's an idiot isn't he? Pure agony atomization -- don't fuck with someone's retirement.
---Fuck you I do what I want attitude ... (Pinkie Doesn't count and Discord is technically evil) Dear deity almighty I love these!!!!
---Chased by Pinkie high on love potion ... "It goes to show that not even the great Damien is invincible." "Shut up. Pinkie Pie doesn't count."
That last one. Good lord. ima be smilin' for weeks thanks to that train of thought.
wheheheeeeel ITS ABOUT TIMEFINALLY
1660168
You haven't read this story yet? If you are a fan of odd circumstances, pranks, and general tom-foolery, I say the chances are good you would like this fic.
Need a pair of "eyes" on the end.
That quotation mark is lost, I think you need to set him straight.
I am very pleased to see another chapter be posted. Even if you think it has a lack of quality compared to your others, I still found it very enjoyable and a hoot to read. It is a bit sad to see that this story will be temporarily shelved, but it would be far worse for you to be burned out. I feel that if you are not having fun while writing it will show and hamper the hilarity we have all seen so far and enjoyed with Retired to Equestria. Good luck to any future endeavors you have, I will possibly read them (after I somehow manage to get through a backlog of stories).
an update!? OH YEAH!
Well it's been some time but it was nice chapter.
As much as I love the idea of evil overlord in Equestria, there is no point struggling with each new chapter.
However it would certianly be nice to see more of it in future.
Good to see you update.
Really good chapter.
Hope you get your mojo back soon.
1664814
Well I got a couple chapter in the works at the moment, some are close to done others are nowhere near that. I'm basically going to be working on them sporadically when my muse beans me upside the head with the mallet of inspiration. Once I get enough chapters done so that I can get a good schedule going without stressing about it I'll start posting things regularly.
I don't suppose you can turn this into a DamienXGilda fic? It seems like its becoming that.
Absolutely worth the wait, don't you worry about quality drop, it was briilliiannt.
Been following this one for a while. I understand the hiatus, but I suspect it might help if you stop focusing on Gallus. He's the least interesting character in this story, and the past few updates have been all about him.
1658459
Griffins have leonine backsides. Of course they have hair.
Great chapter any chance next chapter could be about Damien trying to get away from Pinkie Pie? This chapter has me wondering who are you going to pair Damien with anyway?
1676240
I kinda doubt that Damien will be taking part in any romance in the near future. His romantic prospects are basically individuals that he respects greatly and on that list is...
Luna. Maybe.
But he would refuse any advances from her based on her royalty, her status as a demi-goddess, and the fact that he has firmly placed her in the friend category.
Besides, he's far too busy learning the ins and outs of Equestria, setting up his power base, and enjoying not having responsibilities to deal with romance right now. Maybe in a couple centuries when he's set up and looking for something to do.
1690660
he gives all villans a bad name.
Touche...
This story is...
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I demandz moar of zis.
This is one of only a few fics I've seen that remain interesting and age well for so many chapters. I like the continuing shenanigans of Damien, but I only have a lukewarm reception to Gallus. It's kind of interesting that you used the Gilda-returning-to-ponyville plot as a framing device.
I really hope for more chapters, but the author's note makes me less than certain that more are on their way.
I loved this story and I thoroughly look forward to future chapters.
I'm reading it again!!!
I saw what you did. You retconned your entire story to include changelings.
I'm okay with it though.
Have you heard of the fanfic "Death Battle: Equestria"? I'm sure Damien would make a great combatant there.
Re read this like 3 times now, still waiting for next chapter :) I am hoping this gets off hiatus so bad.
OK, finally finished reading this whole thing. And there's only one thing to be said about this story!
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I'm sorry to ask but will this story be updated?