• Member Since 10th Feb, 2013
  • offline last seen Oct 22nd, 2015

ThatMrSomeGuy


T

(Please note this story is not progressing until further notice but will remain on Fimfiction.)

Twilight questions a huge hole in history, the origin of Princess Celestia's rule over Equestria. Twilight's questions lead her to the princess herself, and reveal a past that was buried for a millennia. Celestia tells Twilight the story of Booker Dewitt. Though only a colt with a seemingly simple task to take away his debt, Booker's actions inadvertently shape the course for the entire future of modern Equestria.

Equestrian Era (EE) 112

Booker Dewitt is tasked to retrieve Elizabeth and bring her back to Manehattan. His journey is set in the mysterious recently lost land of Celestia, where Booker is tossed in the middle of the city's chaotic civil war. Though getting Elizabeth out of her imprisonment is easy, the duo must face the factions known as the Vox Equus, the Keepers of Harmony, and Songgriffon, Elizabeth's skywatching warden/guardian. Will Booker and Elizabeth escape or will they parish along with the decaying radiance of Equestrian ideals?


This idea has been bothering me ever since I saw footage from Bioshock:Infinite. The amazing part of the Bioshock series is the surrealism, the way the creators form a society limited to only that of the mind. Since Equestria is seen as a bright Utopia, a crossover opens up ways which we might envision the dark shadows of a newly established equine nation.

PS: Discord has a role which will take place near the end of the story.

Asked a friend to photoshop the game's logo. Did a good job too. Sorry, no links.

My Little Pony is property of Hasbro.
Bioshock Infinite is property of Irrational Games.

Chapters (10)
Comments ( 59 )

Putting this on read later. Looks interesting enough. :twilightsmile:

How did you manage this, has the game even come out yet?? :rainbowhuh:

2229900 The first chapter "The Colt and the Debt" is from Irrational Games's early released footage of first five minutes of the game.

My version is mainly just the intro ponified. I'm not really trying to take any risks before Bioshock: Infinite goes out. I'll start laying down some fine points when the game is officially released.

As for the prologue, it's just a connection to the MLP Universe we all know and love. I'm likely going to connect one game path and ending to the "How Equestria Was Made" portion of my story.

Good so far keep it up!

"One distinct odd thing about Columbia Booker noticed was that most of the shops were not open." :rainbowderp:

What is this "Columbia"place you speak of? I thought I was reading about the floating city of Celestia.:pinkiehappy:

2340461 What!? I would never do such a foolish-*looks at blunder*

You are getting sleepy. :applejackconfused: When I awaken you, you will forget I ever made a stupid noobish mistake.... Not working? You'll never take me alive! *fixes error*. Ha. You have no proof now...except for the fact I claimed I made a mistake.

Whatevs :derpytongue2:. Appreciate the correction :pinkiehappy:

So how closely will this follow the plot and action of the game? The last chapter was understandably just a ponified version of the first 5 minutes, and it seems like you tried your own things with this chapter.

2341608 I actually plan on making almost no differences to the adventures. The main focus of the story is through the characters. The Booker I created is meant to be a bit more timid and cautious about the events ahead than the one in-game. Elizabeth's character will establish a role fitting to the innocence of being isolated in a tower. It will mature during the progression of my story like the game. Clopstock's prophecy she is rejecting to fulfill will play a major role in her character. I can also guarantee you that my fanfic will be COMPLETELY unlike the ending to Bioshock: Infinite.

The first part was nearly identical to the game because I posted it before the game came out. I didn't want to give out anything that might screw me over when Infinite was released. Now that I feel more comfortable, I will use the same premise but with more emphasis on the thoughts of the characters.

Definitely one of the best stories on this site. I hope Booker gets to f#ck up some guards soon.

2377095 Thanks. I'll try my best to keep up my streak here and hopefully not end up like *looks at other fanfic*...it. But we'll see. You might not see much for a little while. Been busy on trip and work. I'll find some time on a keyboard next week instead of my phone.

I do not know why no one has commented. But I shall

2415806 Yeah it's very quiet comment section. While you're here *pulls out fanfic application I made to prepare for occasion :twilightsmile:*, ahem. How has your story experience been so far? Did you find this story satisfactory? If not, please address why. Is there anything you wish we had done to make your fanfic experience more enjoyable?

Okay I'm done pulling off the stupid jokes now. Just want to know what you thought so far and anything constructive that'll help keep the story flowing.

2417160 This story is great. I had Bioshock: Infinite the first day it came out and I have been waiting for someone to make a very good Fan Fiction about Bioshock. So all I have to say is this story should be Featured.

(Note) Notice how good may grammar is. :twilightsmile:

2421190 *my :derpytongue2:

What do you mean by Featured?

2421217 It should be on whats hot in the browse section.

2424946 Duh. *facepalms*. I honestly don't know what else I was thinking

I really hopes he nails Fank in the head.
Another great chapter

Zebras are African americans. Pony's are Caucasian's. Irish are Changling's ?. I don't even know :unsuresweetie:

This summer. There will be a guy his name would be Booker (Or Equin) Dewitt and he will DO something... Starring Morgan Freeman

2448554 I have no racial consistency linking the races of the game's characters, nor do I have plans on doing so. The focus is mainly on the discrimination of all beings not pony. So don't knot your head in this one. I actually plan on having Daisy as a Griffin. :pinkiegasp:

Comment posted by ThatMrSomeGuy deleted Apr 22nd, 2013

Twilight: Shining are you crying ?
Shining Armor: No its just liquid pride.
Booker: *In the audience* That shits powerful !

I wonder if Luna is somehow involved in this...

I have a few ideas if something like tears will exist in this story.

2452645
That's bad right?
Or do have a-
(No... No he doesn't)

Honestly well done i have nothing i dont like a smart way of pulling of this crosser

2462774 The best (and not followed enough) way to start any good fanfic is to give the reader a reason to want to keep reading. I know this sounds like a "no duh", but it didn't click in my head WHAT they wanted to see. Turns out rewriting Bioshock: Infinite with everyone being a pony wasn't that interesting. (Part 1 was made before the prologue. I got 5 of those 6 dislikes from doing just that.) What made me grab the people's attention was when I tied in characters for the broad brony audience, Celestia and Twilight. Even now, the atmosphere between the two isn't what you expect. You can tell that there are things Celestia is concealing from Twilight, something completely against her nature. That is something which grabs the readers' attention.

As for a crossover on the game itself, since the story is so complex, I'd lay out a destination. Figure out how you should start out and where you want to end. For the middle, I let my imagination take over. I make myself some checkpoints along the way. (They're goals to where and/or how I should end the chapter.)

TL;DR Know how you're hooking the reader, start strong, keep the reader hooked, and have a plan where to end each chapter and the whole story.

2460942 Wait for some reason I have the wrong reply number *deletes comment*. I just don't know what went wrong :derpytongue2:

A great chapter, I love how it doesn't stick to bioshock infinite's original storyline. It instead has it's own.

10 outta potato

Day plot twist.

I like how a lot of this story is original while only following certain aspects from the game. I can't wait to read more.

2531242 Thanks :twilightsmile:. I'm planning on pulling away from Bioshock: Infinite now that the story is nearing the middle.

Just a little friendly reminder that I'll be unable to find the time to work on the next chapter in the following two weeks. Now go read another fanfic. (I would have put this on my blog, but seeing as only 1 person read my last one, I decided to post it here.)

Comment posted by ThatMrSomeGuy deleted May 29th, 2013

" celestia, the highest standard of living"
That would be a really funny catch phrase in the post card.
Also of all the names you could have used you use CLOPstock...
Clop....stock
His parents must have hated him.

2732791 I knew that Clopstock wouldn't be taken maturely to everyone. Hell, I sometimes cracked a laugh thinking about it (at first). Just try to put a dirty mind aside and you'll do just fine.

My brain when I thought Clopstock: :trollestia:

Me when I wrote Clopstock: :ajbemused: :facehoof:

When booker gets to the raffle...
Is he going to be cutting ponies heads off?
Because you need to know that the game gets very violent very fast in a few minutes.

2732883 There will be nothing gruesome. There's going to be deaths, but it'll remain appropriate for teens to read. My focus is not on HOW characters die, so worst thing you'll likely see is X shot X.

BUMBUMBUUUUUUUUUUUM, introducing in this corner, lady of the downtrodden, rebellious leader, but still just as savage as Clopstock, Daisy Fitzroy!! I love the way your handling this your own way, usually when I read a crossover it's follows plots and twists where it originated from, but you are on a whole other level. You have earned my admiration as a writer :rainbowkiss:
Id love to see what path this takes and I'm sure you won't disappoint.

2463868
I enjoy bioshock, and I enjoy ponies.
Bioshock ponies? Definetly!
But the thing is you appear to just be using the story line of bioshock but just adding ponies. Mix it up a bit! Add that mlp flare to it, or at least get a little more creative with events in the story. Because I'm sure this story may end the same way bioshock infinite did with a light pony twist.

An incerpt from
BEKR

"What's this"
Kieth held the strange bottle in his hands, examining its illegible labels.
"That's a vigor." Interjected maybelle.
" If you drink it, you acquire special powers!"
"Powers eh?"
The bottle was thin and black with a small picture of an angel on the label. The cap was an englazed cork, shaped into a form of wings and a halo on the top.
" what kind of powers?"
"We'll.." Maybelle looked over her shoulders to make sure no one was watching them.
"Why don't you drink it and find out?"
The label was small, but kieth could read it.
"Kiss of an angel." He read out loud.
"Make your enemies your friends."
Hesitantly, kieth uncorked the top and brought it to his pursed lips. Maybelle looked at him with concern.
"Uh kieth, have you ever used a vigor befor, or even ingested rainbow spectra of any kind?"
The cool liquid was like tangy fruit punch, with a strong taste of black licorice as it flowed down kieth's throught.
"Huh?" He said after downing the last drop.
"Uh..." Maybelle started to step away from kieth.
" you might want to brace yourself." She said nervously.
"Wha... Huuuuuuhaaaafggghhhh!!!!! "
Emediatly after kieth ingested the vile liquid green smoke began to billow all around him, stinging his eyes, crushing his lungs. He was on his knees, hurling trying to gasp for breath as the smoke engulfed him. He couldn't see, only smoke throught teary eyes.
But then... So suddenly... A light... From afar.
A blinding light. Shined so bright it cut through the horrible smoke like the Devine winds of god, for her light had shined upon kieth for his salvation!
Then a figure... Dressed in elegant white robes, wings flapping so quitly yet powerful, descended from the heavens. A beautifull angel of Devine poise, and elegance flew to the earth and touched kieth upon the face. Kieth could only stare wide eyed at the majestic mare before him. She leaned in, her eyes closed, lips poised, passion flaring as she pulled kieth into a lovers embrace.
Kieth could not believe what was happening nor move to do anything about it. He could only accept the angel's love and claim it as his own.
And as suddenly as she appeared, the angel vanished, leaving a tingling upon kieth's lips.
The smoke dissipated and he was right back where he was, on his knees on the cobble stone street of cloudsdale market square.
" you alright?" Maybelle asked helping kieth get on his feet.
"Wha-what was that?" Kieth trembled.
" that's what happens to those who take vigors for the first time, your lucky it was one of the more pleasant ones. Imagine if you would have drank a shoky jockey? Or a cherry bomb?"
Kieth was still trying to pull his mind back into reality. Holding his head, he noticed a pair of smoke like wings fluttering around his fingers.
"So uh...I have magic powers now?"
"No...not magic, but now you have the ability to cloud the thoughts of others."
Maybelle pointed at the Pegasus pony at one if the chocolate stands.
"Try controlling him!"
Kieth was unsure, but on instinct he flicked the small wings at the vendor. A trail of smoke an butterflies spun around the stallion's head like birds. He stumbled and faltered until he froze then stood erect, like a solider awaiting command.
"This is incredible!" Kieth exclaimed.
"He's under my control!"
" If you think that's cool, wait till you see the rest if cloudsdale!"


Couldn't write more story too long!!!

2779459 Thank you for the advice. I'm planning on making it less of a copy/paste with ponies as it progresses. I simply wanted to conjure up familiarity from the start before branching out. Regardless of the fact that I am saying I'm attempting diversity, I cannot deny that is still lacking. Thank you for using your time to create such a detailed example and I look forward to providing better quality content as the story advances.

2732791

His parents must have hated him.

Heh, I see you haven't finished the game.

Comment posted by RedoutPony deleted Jul 13th, 2013

2868075
Oops. My bad.
But at the same time, it would be nice if you end the story differently then from the game....not to forget this is mlp fan fiction.

2868394 Yeah I did keep that in mind. Easier said than done, right? I'm trying to slow down and actually work at a pace where I come to my senses instead of mindless first-thing-that-comes-to-mind type. Oh and feel free to type with spoiler tag.

2868411
Booker:
It looks like I've been shot. I guess the only question that comes to mind is, " how many trash bins do I have to search through to find enough wasted, perfectly good food to eat to make my health go back up.

Elizabeth:
Booker! I found a random gun in the ground! Here! Let me throw it to you while it's armed and with the safety off while we're in a public place!

Booker:
You're so useful. *sniff*
( booker gets hit in the head with the gun because Elizabeth has a killer right through and booker can't catch for beans.)

"I have played through a good portion of the game-"
"-but he has not yet completed it."
"I know how it ends, though."
"I know."
"Why wouldn't you?"
"I could have asked you the same thing."
"You did."
"Did I?"
"You should have."
"Then, I must have."
"We wish you luck-"
"-in crafting a clever plot-line."
"Do you find it strange that we-"
"-finish each other's sentences? No."
"I was about to say the same thing."
"But you did."

"A fascinating development-"
"-if I do say so myself."
"But you have."
"Of course I have."
"Unless you haven't."
"Good point."
"As always."
"Not always."
"Hmm. You're right."
"Unless I'm wrong."
"You could have been."

"He was discovered."
"He actually lasted much longer than I originally presumed."
"I told you it would work."
"You're quite sure of this theory of yours."
"Why? You aren't?"
"I have been, and am."
"Is that your perception of it?"
"It could be."
"And it is."

"Dead is dead."
"Alive is alive."
*flips a coin* "What do you see, here?"
"I see heads."
"I see tails."
"It's all about perspective."
"Are they dead?"
"Are they alive?"
"Died. Dies. Will die."
"Lived. Live. Will live."
"Two sides of the same coin."

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