Bad End
The following chapter is optional story-canon, and has more plot holes in it than a book about Swiss cheese. Take it seriously at your own volition.
THEY SHRUNK MY T-SHIRT IN THE WASH! I’VE BEEN BETRAYED!
There was a stillness across all of Equestria, and the smell of petrichor was heavy on the land and air. The tempest of Discord’s chaos had passed and Harmony reveled in the calm after the storm. Flight came easy to her even without any draft carrying her wings. She was alone in the sky, but the brief sequestration was not unwelcome. She did not enjoy over-crowded social gatherings as much as Celestia and Luna, neither did she feel that the celebration was justified. The six mares wielding her elements were not the heroes they believed they were, and the hardships they suffered were only a fraction of the sacrifices made by the true heroes.
The tragic fate of the loving mother still weighed heavy in her heart, but Harmony continued to rise upward as the craggy mountain grew closer. She ignored the small shiver that traveled through her veins. The lack of sunshine was likely just making her feel a bit chilly. It was odd that the skies would be still choked with clouds, but she humorously dismissed it as her brother’s world’s flair for drama still lingering and carried onward.
Miles away from civilization, in sealed by stone inside a long-abandoned dragon’s den, the unsung martyr of Equestria waited patiently in his prison for his earned reward. Discord’s shell would remain imprisoned and alone forever, but his spirit would finally be able to rise above the hurt and the strife that had followed him for all his life. The draconequus had not spoken a word to her or Brother Love after Screwball was given her peace, and Love had excused himself to find his fiancé soon after. Harmony watched alone at a distance as Discord spent the last few hours of his mortal life in his world of chaos, laughing emptily as prank after horrid prank was sprung on the hapless ponies. She couldn’t have asked him to undo it, not after losing Screwball. With her gone, he only had chaos left to fill his broken heart.
She circled around the base of the mountain, climbing higher until she reached the summit, where a pile of boulders standing on a ledge were stacked against the outside of the mountain. She flew through the stones as if they were made of gas and entered her brother’s tomb. Not even the dimmest ray of light from Celestia’s sun or Luna’s stars would would ever enter the cave. She did not imagine that Discord could tell the difference between any light or darkness, but the princesses did enjoy making a point.
With only the slightest exertion, Harmony’s feathers began to glow like embers. Soon she was like a small comet in the cave, casting shadows across her petrified brother’s face. She was fearful for a moment. She knew Discord had his face stretched in fear, but the glow of her half-light warped his features to something hideous and wrathful. Forcing away as much of her fear as she could, she dimmed her light and perched on Discord’s outstretched arms. His shadow-crossed and hateful eyes looked fixed on her. She was unable to rationalize it to herself and began the spell to free his spirit.
After many seconds, it became clear that something was very wrong. She had opened the door for Discord to exit through, but he did not come. He was undoubtedly still mourning the loss of his mother, but he should not be left alone. In some cases, people who were left to be consumed by their grief could become self-destructive. She bobbed back and forth on her feet when she imagined feeling the statue throb under her. She looked around her, as if she expected to find someone ready to help her. Foolish old girl. She didn’t need anyone else for this, she could do it on her own. Her feathers bristled as she took a deep breath in preparation for entering her brother’s prison. She closed her eyes, and Harmony vanished from the world.
It felt like she was drowning in an arctic sea. The blinding darkness around her sapped away at every ounce of her strength, threatening to steal her away forever. She swam, she flew, she fell, she fought with all her strength to escape the numbing emptiness around her. Eventually it took her, and Harmony drifted through the blackness entirely apart from herself. It was not frightening anymore, but it was still strange. She felt like she was a spirit again, moving through the void just by willing it. Her body was still with her, but it was as if she was dragging a puppet behind her rather than controlling it. Is this how Discord felt for all those centuries?
She sluggishly moved her head side to side as though it would bring her more clarity of mind. Finding Discord was the whole reason she had come here. She needed to find him and get back home to Love and the others. The Princesses. Them. Equestria? The dark was fuzzy around her, like a big black mat of fur. It sloshed in her ears, slipping in and out and taking everything with it. She was Harmony. She was there to help someone. It was who she was.
“Hello?” she called into the darkness. “Is anyone there?”
She craned her neck without moving it, tilting to the side to listen to the soft hissing leaking in the distance.
“...seND... AwAy... anD nOw... gaME... They ARE... Time To sHow... MakE tHem... STaRt...”
The leak dripped out her ears and she could not remember.
“Is there someone there? Anyone? I think I’m lost. I’m looking for a way out. Can you hear me?”
The hiss dripped in every direction. It never got louder. But the longer she listened, the clearer the idea became. It had to be what she was searching for. She followed after the leak, unsure if it was moving away or coming closer to her.
“ThEy maDe me... HER... fOrever... theY thiNk The... is Over... WrONg... whAt real ChAoS is... feel what I feel... CeLeStia’s fAUlt... with... HER.”
Harmony stopped breathing. The leak was staying where it had always been. It was all around her.
“H-hello?! W-where are you!?”
“Very. Close. By.”
Even in the numbness, she could feel the crushing pressure as fingers laced around her throat and chest. She could not move, she could not think, she could only wait.
“I think that I will stay a little longer. I owe Celestia something. I owe all of Equestria, really. A present. And I think that I’ll give it to you, first. Sister Dear.”
Flesh and bone twisted. And Harmony vanished from the world.
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Bad ending is sad ending
Harmony nooooooo
I congratulate you for writing an excellent bit of fanfiction, good sir! It has been great fun working with you and getting ALL THE SPOILERS on everything.
Wait, so "Screwball dies, Discord leaves forever, and no one is ever told that he's not the horrible villain they think he is because if Love or Harmony told someone what's going on it would make things slightly less tragic" ISN'T the bad end?
I am almost afraid to read this chapter.
EDIT: Ah. It's the difference between a Tragic end and a Tragic Dark end.
Interesting!
Not exactly something that I feel fits with the story but nontheless appreciated considering the vast ammount of happy endings that you usually get. So I am very gratefull for this change in pace. Thank you.
That's clever. I like that ending, not as much as the true ending, but it's a clever link.
SO MUCH WORDS... SO MUCH YES...
AUTHOR, I FUCKING LOVE YOU FOR WRITING THIS.
1468448
There's also a fourth way, where an author can hockey punch their reader. But that's really the least common way of doing it. Be sure to email me any tears you find. I need them for reasons.
1468686
You know, I never felt one way or the other about Screwball before writing this story. Then I wound up tearing a bit writing the last few chapters. I can't believe Hoity Toity and Winona have character tags, but Screwball has to get roped in with "Other". We should petition a Screwball tag.
That aside, I'm eagerly looking forward to seeing you later on! And please do check out my other two fics if you'd care to.
1468783
Um. Well. I can honestly say I've never made someone introspective with a story before. So this calls for some celebration whiskey distilled from the tears of my readers!
But who said Death was the bad guy? Just because he tries to kill everything, "Oooh, he's EVIL." Harmony's the one who ultimately put Discord down, I say SHE'S the true evil mastermind of the story!
1468850
Delicious tears.
Um.. About that alternate ending. I met you half-way in that I gave you a new way for it to end. Just not a happy way. You're welcome!
1468870
No, thank you for reading! I mean it, I'm glad that I could make an impact however small or fleeting on a person's life with just my silly story.
1470111
Thank you for sticking around for the full year! I'm glad that I could brighten up your days a bit!
1470436
Those damn delayed-reaction onions. I don't even know why farmers insist on growing them.
Thanks so much for reading!
1470466
I'm truly flattered! Thanks a bundle! I hope you enjoyed the new experience of sadness at a story. I feel like I popped your emotion cherry. This response is going really well so far, I'm proud of myself.
Though I'm having a bit of trouble seeing what your image is there.
1470506
I'm glad that you're still going to like the story for the whole and not let any problems at the last sour it for you. But just as you'll stand by your judgement, I still hold firm that I had to give it a more definite ending. The battle was the climax of the story, chapter 18 was the falling action, and the epilogue was the dénouement. I'm a stickler to Dramatic Structure, since that's how I was taught to write stories. But even if you didn't like the ending, I'm glad that you at least didn't hate it, and even more glad that you've stuck with us to the end.
1472888
Hearts? I can't drink these! Maybe I can distill it into alcohol or something, I don't know, I'll figure it out. Thanks for the love!
1473231
Where's the fun in a perfectly happy ending? I wouldn't be able to get nearly the reaction from people if he lived happily ever after, especially when we know Discord doesn't. But as for "why", it's because I'm an awful mean person who never got enough hugs, so now I trick people into getting attached to stories and tearing their hearts out.
And sure you got the Cadence reference. But did you pick up on the clues that our friend Masky is the ancestor of a certain Mane 6 member?
1476206
Pashoo, old buddy old pal, I can't tell you how much it really does mean to me to hear you say that. That was honestly very beautiful, you should try your own hand at writing! I'd love to see what you can do! You can bet that I'll be writing for a long time to come, and I have plenty of story ideas already lined up. You'll be hearing a lot more from me.
1479157
I don't think I can let Sir Beakington read the part where she dies. He might think I'm discriminating.
Thanks for all the fun, Grey! But the joke's on you, I've been getting all the spoilers on YOUR story, too!
i.imgur.com/YAT54.gif
1479189
Yup. I like to think of the Bad End as a bit of a silver lining. For someone. Definitely not anyone in these stories though. Maybe Luna a bit in Heavenly Turmoil.
1479218
I do hate to see happy endings myself. I just wrote this up to complete my original intention of linking this story to Heavenly Turmoil. I realized that I couldn't make it work feasibly, since this Discord isn't pure evil. So I fudged it a bit~
1479443
I love you too, mysterious crazy stranger! Enjoy the story!
Gee, that would be sure to put a downer on my day. I dunno, honestly, I don't feel much from reading this ending as compared to the other ending. I legitimately think my mind is rejecting this one in order to save me from unnecessary mental trauma. Like, I physically cannot process this and oh my god what's going on please help. In any case, I stand by my original point, you have written my most favoritest story, ever, and I shall cherish it always!
Well, now I'm going to have to read Heavenly Turmoil, aren't I
>Tragedy, Dark
>TheManWithTwoNames
i258.photobucket.com/albums/hh257/webbymcroll/120154__UNOPT__safe.png
I have mixed emotions with the two endings. I'm more of a fan of happy endings (the good ones that aren't lazily, unrealistically sweet... which are nearly extinct) so I can't say I was... erm... happy at the bittersweet ending. (Though I'm glad Screwball regained some lucidity before she died.) Ultimately, though, I enjoyed it, even when I was depressed.
I'm grateful that it was a thoughtful ending, rather than a simple, slapped together ending. ("And twenty years later, everyone realized that Discord and Screwball meant well, so the princesses broke Discord free, Discord learned his ways, Screwball regained her mind, and everyone sang Kumbaya while having a pizza party. -- The End.")
And even though the "Bad End" is thoroughly epic, as it's been said, it doesn't feel like it connects well with the rest of the Head Full of Cotton Candy... unless, of course, something gradually happened in Discord's head that we weren't aware of...
Anyway, it was overall an amazing story, and I look forward to reading your future stuff.
And I just realized... silly me. I tried to follow you twice, and in effect, stopped following you completely! Time to turn stalker mode on again. >:)
I was wondering how this would mesh with Turmoil. Clever way to have your cake and eat it too. I look forward to any and all of your future work.
It's a stretch, but I guess it makes sense, since Screwball was pretty much his only grip on anything but chaos since the beginning. Truly losing her and then being left alone for a few more moments to drown out the pain with grey before being turned to stone for what I'm guessing was just a day or two yet could have felt like a century to Discord,could have allowed his mind to fracture.
As for why his rage is focused on Celestia, and not say, his 'family' who brought Screwball's suffering to light, perhaps in his fractured psyche (within his petrified body) he realized Celestia created him and blames her for what he sees now as a painful and pointless existence? Would make Celestia's downfall in Heavenly Turmoil much crueler too, given he never really explains why he's doing any of the things he's doing.
How morbid.... (Reflects for a few minutes. Considers the possibility that the whole Changeling Invasion might have been caused by Discord. Considers the tone of this chapter and the other one....)
I like it!
I honestly don't know wether to slap you or hug you for the sheer amount of emotions you made me feel through the last few chapters... You made me cry dammit now I need to hug my imaginary plushy... *sniff* DAMNIT WHY DID YOU HAVE TO KILL SCREWBALL
Just take my moustaches...
...
I'm off to cry for discord... So much pain...
But the great cannon to the clouds shall tell,
And the king's rouse the heavens all bruit again,
Re-speaking earthly thunder.
dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Lyra_cry.png
I'm gonna take that last chapter as an "alternate universe". I like the new discord you've put before me. He's crazy and kooky, but he has his "try to be a good guy/pony/draconus" moments(when he isn't being driven completely insane by his chaos...) also read the chaos continues section, and thought it was very well written and an interesting way to tie it to cotton candy. Thank you for the good read. I'll be back to read again someday.
oh one other thing before I forget. I see some fimfic authors who try to do small printing sessions of their stories. Is that anything you'd every consider doing with this cause I'd honestly buy that. Just a question. Thanks again.
1512550
Yup. The original plan was to make HFoCC a prequel to Heavenly Turmoil. Buuuut then it wouldn't work out with the nice guy Discord I wrote here, so I decided to just make that an alternate ending. I look forward to seeing you back.
I'm truly flattered that you say so. But as this is, I don't have much interest in printing this particular story. Maybe one day I'll revisit it, take the ponies out of it and rework the story and writing and make it something original. But for now, I think fimfiction is a good enough home for it.
This story made me cry, and it was beautiful ending, I don't think that it needed anything else, and I don't really like revenge-obsessed characters. But that's just my opinion I suppose. I bet lots of people are happy to see more being added to the story, and I'll stick around and see what happens later, but in my heart, it ended with the epilogue.
Little Talks by Of Monsters and Men
I realized a while ago but forgot, then remembered. This song is eerily appropriate for the story, from the disregarding words and disappearing, to the old and empty house and the ship made of moonlight, and the little voice inside her head that's holding her back. My mind was blown when I made the connections, and then it was blown, again, when I remembered, after I forgot.
I just had a thought/question there at the end about love....and was wondering if you could answer it. Love said he(Albeit she) was a princess from another kingdom. He's pink....He(she) wouldn't happen to be Cadence would they? Just wanting to check.
1601267
Precisely.
THAT is devious, tricky, and with the marriage to shining and all that(especially with the latest episode), kinda creepy. Good job.
This is a very good tragedy story, this whole thing was just one big clusterfuck of a situation the only group I consider to be a villainous would be the other spirits except Harmony. If anything it was just a series of poor decision making on everyone's part. Discord wasn't really a bad guy what sent him over the edge was being encased in stone and killing screwball
that pretty much did it. It really did not help that just about everyone treated him like a big o pile a crap. Just to be sure this is in no way a negative review I just have problems conveying meaning through writing. Awesome story.
Unrelated to above but I'm pretty sure Harmony and Celestia stole the name for the elements from Discord and his lessons from Screwball she did after all come up with it when she met him I may have to re-read but I'm pretty sure.
Feel free to point things out to me on my shoddy comments I'm fairly sure i missed something.
1693039f
You're right on the money about the names of the elements. Discord even commented about it in the Epilogue.
1737834
Thank you so much for all your kindness! I actually never wanted this story to turn into my headcanon while I was writing it, but it starting leaking in eventually. I still try to separate this story from canon, but I'll roll my eyes whenever I hear someone say Screwball is Discord's daughter. Because I know better.
So many comments about the tragic structure of the story and how tragic the events are, but no tragedy tag?
1756182
Because it isn't really a tragedy. It doesn't meet the qualifications. It has sad parts in it, because no interesting story is happy the whole way through. I like to think of this story as mostly light adventure with a bittersweet ending than a long march to the gallows. If you want to see a tragedy, check out my other story "Heavenly Turmoil."
Can I just say that I loved this story from beginning to end? Absolutely everything was brilliant, from the characterizations to the pacing to the story itself... honestly, I see nothing here to complain about and a whole lot to admire.
The action scenes were great, in my opinion, and the comedy scenes were funny and well done. Discord's genesis fits in with the canon and makes an otherwise unsympathetic villain suddenly very relatable and likeable. Screwball was a fantastically realized character, and her fate was a gut punch (in a good way, if that's possible). The emotional impact when I realized what was going to happen to her has stayed with me, even since I'd finished reading this. I have a feeling that I'll still be feeling that hit in a year, two, three or more. Whenever I think of Screwball, now, I'll think of this story and feel a burst of melancholy.
All in all, a highly polished work of art, and it definitely deserves whatever praise it gets.
1836376
Thank you so so much for all your kind words! I'd be flattered to hear that from anyone, but coming from a popular author on here makes it even more exciting.
But consider Screwball's gut punch as making us even for making me sad with the Keepers of Discord.
2063087
I don't even remember what I was doing that night that elicited such a comment...but it has been made, and I stand by my statement.
2063664
I still think it was funny.
2064225
S'all that matters to me.
2355189
This is the meanest April Fools joke EVER.
But for real, thanks so much for your kind words! And now to add your tears to my collection...
And if you want to read more about the other Spirits in a sillier story, check out "The Life and Times of Love and Harmony."
I just finished reading this, and I have to saw, it is one of the best stories I've ever read. You ripped my heart out, you bastard, and actually managed to make me cry from it.
Easily up there with Fallout Equestria and the show itself.
2458394
Delicious, delicious tears sustain me.
Thanks so much for your incredible compliment! I've never read Fallout, but from what I understand it's a big deal.
But now what you've gotta do us dare people to read the story without crying. When they get a few chapters in and get cocky, you put a wager on the line. Then by the end of the story you've made some easy money.
2458496
That was your great evil plan. Make the story all silly and light hearted, get us to love Screwball and Discord, and then BAM!
Right in the feels organ.
If Screwball was voiced, what do you think she'd sound like?
2818445
I'd like to imagine a sort of young and nervous but still motherly voice. I remember talking about voices for the story ages ago with someone else in the comments, but I can't for the life of me think of what I said. Maybe I had said Nicole Oliver before? Or Hynden Walch.
Been reading this at work on my kindle the past few days. I really really enjoyed it. My only complaint is that you had some epic foreshadowing at the beginning when Harmony said she could only offer Discord a chance to fix himself and then forced it in the end anyways. I was really looking forwards through the whole story on how you would work that into the confrontation between the sisters and the king. I feel a little cheated. Other than that though, very well done.
2942679
The whole gag I was working toward was that Celestia and Luna were only important in their own minds. In every other story you read, they're portrayed as bitter rivals, so that was something I wanted to turn on its head.
Plus, keeping in mind that Discord accidentally kills entire armies and two alicorns before the story starts and he knows how to use magic, there wouldn't be much of a brawl.
And the final gag was that just like Discord never took the sisters as a threat, the Spirits never took Harmony seriously. And all of them ended up foiling the others.
There, got through the to the end. Kinda wish I had stayed with it when it was updating.
This story had all sorts of ups and downs on the emotional level. Just when things look like they are going to get better, it gets worse. In the context of this story, I really felt the tragedy that surrounded Discord and Screwball throughout their journey together. But during that journey there were flashes of hope and inspiration that Discord wasn't just a doofus with a twisted mind, but a complex being just trying to find his place in the world.
I found the earlier to middle stuff, when Discord and Screwball were traveling around and meeting new characters that would play a role later, to be some of the weaker parts. It just didn't grab me like the ending chapters did. At the time I wasn't sure where the story was going, but the payoff was worth it I think. I just had to tough it out.
A wonderful job on this! Thanks for giving us this insight for these characters!
3179589
I wrote that chapter half a year before that episode existed.
Just keep reading, I've got a contingency plan for that whole deal.
3181575
That was Love, the very first.
And thanks for the compliment on the battle! I was afraid it was going to be too over-the-top, but I never heard any complaints about it.
And eh... hate to rain on your parade, but Snake's speech was "War has changed." The Fallout intro has the "War never changes" line.
3181922
YOU BASTARD! HOW COULD YOU MAKE THIS CANON!? HOW!? If this had to be canon then...SCREW YOU!
No seriously, i got oucjed by this, and it's not any day i simply read a fic and have a mini Discord poking my heart with a stick. IT HURTS.
3181922
It still counts. Or i'd rather just go find another person that says that line. NAAAAAAAH
3354487
I have no idea what the hell this is.
3357646
A cloak?
I love this story, but you should add the dark tag and tragedy tags methinks, it's not bloody or anything like that, but Screwballs and Discords fate is more and more tragic the more you actualy think about it. Did i mention more?
7626846
I wouldn't say I'm never around. Just more like a ghost
You should read on! It gets sadder.
I read this story quite a few months ago but have only just made an account on the site, so I felt I should comment. I absolutely loved it - the characterization was spot on, the chaos wasn't overdone, and the plot was continually surprising.