i find this interesting lets see where this leads on

Good start.

>>162097162097

Thank you! I'm glad you enjoyed it.

I look forward to reading more!

I want more!I see potental!I also see High Ratings!And Pinkie Pie!An-Wait Pinkie?!?!?

>>162148162148

Thank you so much! I'm happy everyone's enjoying it, so far.

Need moar. This has the capability of appearing on my "shit-the-bed-when-updates" list.

Can't say too much about it, as it's only the prologue, but I thoroughly enjoyed what's there. I like your style with the first person narrative.

This is a rough crossover to do right, so I haven't seen a lot of people try to take it on... I'm really curious to see where you'll take this.

>>162192162192

Thank you. And you make a fair point about Dead Space/FiM crossovers. I decided, right off the bat, to not have Issac Clarke as the protagonist. I didn't want to risk pulling him out of character, or confusing people who haven't played the games. Now that I think of it, I won't be referencing the games in any great detail, after the prologue. I want to keep this as open as possible to potential readers.

Interesting premise AND beautifully written? Certainly looking forward to updates and editing of this supposed horrid prologue! Youve got a track my friend

can't wait for next chapter

I appreciate everyone taking the time to comment. When I first submitted this, I wasn't expecting such an overwhelmingly positive response!

Since everyone enjoyed this humble prologue, I will keep to my word, and begin work on a full-length, proper first chapter this weekend. I'll try to update regularly, but I'm going to keep a 'quality-over-quantity' approach to this story. I want to make sure the subsequent chapters continue to be worthy of your attention (and the flood of tracking notifications my Gmail inbox received. Lordy).

Moar. that is all i ask of you.

All of those 5 stars including my own, are mostly for the shear concept of this story, not the length nor quality (although is wasn't bad (actually quite good) by any stretch of the imagination).

I Think the majority of Bronies are also paradoxically dead space and horror fans.

You have my attention, but one thing I'm wondering is what this is a crossover of.

>>163087163087

Dead Space 2, but you don't need any prior knowledge to understand it. I won't be heavily referencing either of the games, in this story.

Dis is approved, now continue before the might of my...I don't know...shoe? Yeah, let's go with that...As I was saying, continue or face the might of my shoe of pain...and tolerance...

I demand more.

moar

I like where this is going! I am anticipating the next chapter!

ponys no like humans 3;

Find a mlp/dead space crossover

objective complete

good story bro (no sarcasm). keep it up!

Thanks, everyone! I'm glad you enjoyed it, I managed to crank it out in an afternoon, since I didn't want to leave people in suspense for too long, after the prologue. I'll try to update semi-weekly, so expect a new chapter sometime next weekend.

Awesome

I rarely give out five stars, but here you go.

Ponies gonna eat 'dem Divet rounds.

And so it was......lets see where this crazy train will take us.

I NEED moar

Well actually i did expect a earlier chapter and i hoping for earlier chapter

I forsee Jack being the only other human becoming a problem.

I don't have much time left.

When I first saw that this was updated, my mouth instantly conformed to the shape of the middle slit of an Advanced suit's visor. Unfortunately, my facial muscles were torn apart in the process, and I'm losing alot of blood. Let's hope I can find an Infector so I can continue reading the story.

EPIC

( I almost feel sorry for him) Are you a red vs blue fan too?

>>180282180282

Yes! I'm glad someone caught the reference.

I liked it! The fight flowed well and was evenhanded, which is rare in Soldier in Equestria stories, so kudos to that.

Now, I did spot a couple of things that, while I won't call them issues, did bother me a bit.

Primarily, I feel that Jack adjusted a little too quickly in that second half. I can understand, mid-battle, how a soldier could put aside all concerns and concentrate on the fight. However, once he was in the castle, I was expecting a "holy hell WTF just happened!?" moment and a little more hostility toward the ponies that beat him up.  It was a little jarring when he went straight from "I'm not sure about these sentient alien beings that just read my mind" to "okay, sure, whatever I can do to help, princess!"

The second thing I noticed, which is much more minor, was Jack's lack of use of his stasis module... that boggled my mind, because I know whenever I played it was the first thing I used against a big enemy.

Again, though, this is minor stuff. The story, overall, is well written and extremely enjoyable. Keep it up!

I got the reference but only because i love red vs blue. but that was a previous life, bout 4 years ago. but i remember every line ever said. but now my concious life is dominated by ponies, and only the most distant thoughts tell anything otherwise. Wow i sound dramatic...i should start writing again

Good story. keep up the great imagination and such. ill be waiting for the next one, ur being tracked

>>180428180428

I'm glad you pointed those things out. Now that I've read back over the chapter, I completely agree. I should have spent more time on the second-half.It could probably use a rewrite or two.

And as for Jack not using his stasis module, don't worry! That'll be explained in the next chapter.

I look forward to seeing where this is going!

>>180428180428: As far as i know the only reason why Isaac has a Tele..Cant spell that. Is because hes an engineer, The soldier also said: telekinetic modules used by engineers to lift heavy objects, something I’d seen dozens of times. I’d just overreacted….somewhat.

Which leaves me to believe that Telekinetic modules are not standard issue for soldiers... Even though they should be :/

Man kills necromorphs in large numbers, survives horrors of Titan station, has been trained for years as a lethal killing machine and as a bonus comes equipped with the best RIG available AND a side arm... Only to get taken out by a DAM PONY with medieval technology....

cool story bro.

hmmm i like deadspace/mlp:fim crossovers but i dont see a high amount of good ones and the good one im reading NEVER UPDATES i will track and move on to the next few chapters and will give more input and most likely positive praise after

PS: awsome start

i would put a bullet in that things head

also its awsome you better never quit writing unless you want a bullet to the head

>>182452182452 err its also a relatively large stallion in thick metal armor 500 lbs he was also disarmed so it be like trying to fight a small quick as shit flying bull with armor versus a normal human that although also has armor probably has no exsperience fighting horses alot of fighting styles are against OTHER HUMANS  thats like training a human to fight a bear when there not fighting bears there fighting other humans

sorry i have to interrupt but in dead space the main character isaac clark can take down bezerkers and levianths kill every living dead necromorph survive massive hits and all. he shouldn't get taken down by a single pony who may be kinda big but it can't be as strong as a beserker. plus the beserker hits you a lot and isaac is a engineer only this guy is a solder probably better armor. i understand he doesn't have any guns but isaac can handle a bezerker hit easily umm bezerker is a lot more stronger. i am sorry if i made anyone angry but its just i feel jack should have beat the pegasus up to nonexistence with minor wounds.

>>197303197303

A fair point. Isaac Clarke is indeed able to take down a plethora of Necromorphs in the game, and can shrug off some pretty nasty hits. But bear in mind, if Dead Space was realistic in terms of damage dealt by Necromorphs, a single blow from a leviathan, or any other Necromorph, could easily kill him. As much as I wanted to have Jack be beat three kinds of snot from the General, I had to keep things realistic and balanced.

When writing the fight scene, I was careful not to make either Jack or the General feel overpowered. Jack had a gun, yes, but pulse rounds aren't designed for piercing armor, and the General was wearing a particularly heavy suit of it (it also has other...properties imbued in it, but that's for later chapters). His wings gave him more mobility and speed, but Jack's suit made them nearly equal in terms of strength. General Titus had to resort to body-slamming Jack, in the end, and no amount of armor or training can help you bounce back from that.

I hope you don't think I'm spitting on your opinion, since I do appreciate you taking the time to comment. I also hope you don't think that I'm going to make Jack underpowered. Trust me, when things start to heat up, and Jack hits his stride, he's going to make Isaac look like a chump with a fancy plasma cutter.

-Wes

Will there be a new chapter soon, because i look at this every day and it keeps knawing at me that it hasn't been posted.

I'll have a new one up soon, hopefully. Probably by next week, since I'll be busy this weekend.

I'm not a huge Dead Space fan, but I have to say you've got me interested. Tracked.

PS: RvB FTW!

>>212860212860

I know the feeling. While I like this story, the game was...creepy...putting it lightly.

well I'm glad for the respond sorry about the rant and i can't wait for the new chapters to come out i definably tracked this

still i wish his suit was stronger than that

I remember reading this when it first came out, but alas, I forgot to track.

I really do hope you go into more details about the Sprawl and Jack's past. You'd make me a very happy pony if you threw some Necromorph in there too. Or give him a Plasma Cutter or SOMETHING besides a pistol.

I happily await an update!

>>228037228037

Where is he going to get industrial engineering equipment in a renaissance era alien planet?

But yeah, a few Necromorphs would be nice.

Necromorphs will probably make an appearance later on, but not in an overt way. I mean, Equestria won't suddenly be invaded by them or anything.  

>>228262228262

Oh, I dun know. Perhaps Celestia can magic up some parts or sumthin. I'm just hoping that he gets a batter weapon.

Very good chapter, I like thinking about a guy trying to explain complex mechinery to a genious.

Haha I'm glad your using dead space 2 for this in dead space 1 you had to find stasis replenishing stations or else it wouldn't be there. Haha in 2 it regenerates and I can't wait to see him finally find his guns hopefully.

>>228745228745

Early in this chapter's creation, I did write, quite in detail, Jack explaining how his RIG worked (which I mostly had to BS, since the inner-workings of  technology isn't really explained in Dead Space). However, I simply didn't want to have Twilight Sparkle nod and understand everything he said. That wouldn't make much sense, since she's never technology like that before.

>>228405228405

The divet pistol is a REALLY good weapon. Did you see what one shot did to Terrence Kyne?

Honestly, I thought this chapter to be most intriguing. Nothing exceptionally amazing, but really good. You're quite the writer, OnlyWes.

This may just be the only Dead Space crossover I like. I'm not a big fan of "First, a guy from Dead Space comes and thEN OMMGG NECROMORPHS EVERYWHER!1".

Jack seems like an interesting protagonist, all in all.

So, good sir...

Image: http://escolatecnicasimonsen.files.wordpress.com/2011/11/not-bad.jpg

>>228281228281 yay we get to watch ponta get there heads ripped off and mutated by necromorphs yayyyyyy

I haven't even played either of the games in the dead space series, but this has OFFICIALLY caught my interest.

*like, track, and watch*

New chapter...soon, please

Can't keep waiting. AAAGGHHHHH

Update...

Good chapter, sir.

THANK YOU! Finally someone makes a protagonist that doesn't use snappy comebacks when the bad guy mouths off. That's a really annoying cliche that I hope people stop using.

Great chapter...beautiful. I am satified...for now

Not bad at all. Some minor grammar mistakes here and there, but those are minor details.  Overall you did a good job at setting the story up. Don't feel bad about the "lack" of fleshing out the Ventralis. Save that for the rest of the story when we can see the man for who is based on his actions...Anyway I am super excited to read this!

Dead Space is one of my favorite games so I highly doubt that you can disappoint me.

Best of luck with your story!

its nice

I only agreed to pre-read it because I love it and you honestly don't make me do much work.

Image: http://regectedriter.files.wordpress.com/2011/10/like-a-boss-700x437.jpg

(I can only hope to be as cool as Beaker someday.)

In  my mind

Image: http://image.gamespotcdn.net/gamespot/images/2010/341/dead_space_2_spacey_72240_screen.jpg

Like a FRICKEN BOSS!!!

Great work man

I'm glad everyone's enjoyed it, so far!

I can not describe how much I am enjoying this story.  The only way this could POSSIBLY get better is if somehow someone got a line cutter...or a contact beam, a force gun...or a ripper. I look forward to the next installment!

Herp derp.

Imagined Isaac fighting the Tripod in space...then replaced it with a griffin.

I enjoyed this SO much!

*grabs a pile of internetz*

*throws them at theonlywes*

Here! Have them all! Your name is on all of them anyway!

Thaank yoooou for the new chapter!

Awesome fight! Just headbutt the bad guy in the head when he's mocking you, that's just awesome!

Maybe the other human is.....

ISAAC CLARKE DUN UDUDUDUNN DUUN

In that case, he'l probably win a fight if he has any of his tools with him.

>Wake up in unknown place

>Instantly be charged with crimes against Equestria.

...

Seems Legit.

*Draws out Pulse Rifle*

*Reloads and aims ahead*

Ready for more Dead Space action!

I wanted to comment earlier, but I couldn't stop reading.

Its pretty good, though the chapters are kinda small. Im just sayin.

Oh and you forgot about his weapon/s!

you know, for someone that has not really, played dead space, i totally get that the RIG is a holographic projection screen that shows info and vital signs and maps and more info, and if i remember right, its also the pause screen to. i have only played the first dead space demo . i really just want the full game!

awesome story!

~~~rainbow_shy   

i still wonder where his seeker rifle is

>>315178315178

Don't worry, his Seeker Rifle will be making a return soon. But, let's just say that Jack won't necessarily be the one who finds it first....

i approve.

three spike and a macintosh for you.

MAOR

10 out of 5 moustaches and a crazy pinkie

and a dancing luna

Image: http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-emvp1EJv8Tg/TbiaREieCuI/AAAAAAAAD2Q/n7J6JQj_bZI/s1600/8750+-+animated+dancing+luna+moon.gif

Jetpacks make everything better.

OH DAMN!

Cigar explosion? Now that's just overkill.

>>353576353576

I know, right? Jack isn't going to be happy about that, next chapter...

>>353576353576Overkill?...Maybe...

Badass?Hell yes.

Your argument is invalid.

And the plot thickens...I gotta admit, the warlock right now sounds more like a magical version of Joker. Long winded speeches, exploding gags, and the use of hammers.

I think you are really onto something here though. Stripping away the innocence of the ponies creates a great emotional impact that I am looking forward to seeing how they develop.  I hope that Jack is there to help them through it however.

I can't say how pleased I am to see this chapter up! I really love your story. It would be interesting to see if something more than just a man from dead space enter the story. It would be nice to see Jack get/create his Seeker rifle again. On the other hand the story that you have established is very well thought and it might hinder your story.  I look forward to your next chapter! Oh and have a wonderful spring break!

No! Not the cigar!

Oh god... It's someone else from the Dead Space universe.

Edit:

Oh my god what if it's Isaac Clarke...

You sure took your sweet time with this. *sigh* Though as a soldier I believe he could have asked for retribution for the crap they put him trough. Btw how in the wide world of f**k does he not have kinessis or stasis?

>>353779353779

I never said that he didn't have them. Don't worry, he'll be using them soon enough. But only in a scenario that fits within the context of the story.

>>353811353811 Mhm. An even though its hardly anything you can do about it now, you made his reactions a tad bit not plausible. Way to forgiving as a battle hardened soldier, he didn't ask for retribution nor anything for the crap he went trough. I've seen this scenario way too many times and its just as unrealistic as ever. Too accepting, too forgiving ,too fast, all I'm saying. And what did happen to his riffle ? Surely you have not forgotten about it.