TheOnlyWes
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Prologue
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It didn’t take a genius to know I was a dead man. All around me, screams, gunfire, and hellish roars blended together in a deafening cacophony of sound. Necromorphs of every shape and size poured from broken vents and bulkheads, charging towards the struggling squad of soldiers clustered at the end of a narrow hall. And, as fate would have it, I was among those brave, doomed bastards.
My name is Jack Ventralis, a Lieutenant serving in the elite EarthGov Special Forces. I have the best RIG money could buy, my armor was beyond bleeding edge, and months of brutal training had shaped me into a killing machine that excelled at...well, killings things. My job ensured that I’d been briefed on the Necromorphs, two years before my deployment to Titan Station. All members of the Special Forces were given data on the Necromorphs, on the off-chance we ever fought them. EarthGov was quite proud of its skilled Intelligence teams for giving us accurate intel, though nothing could have prepared me for my first encounter with the damn things. I’ve seen a lot of nasty stuff in my time, but Necromorphs take the cake. Rotten corpses with blade-like limbs protruding from their backs, eyes that blazed with nothing but as feral instinct to kill. They were the stuff of nightmares...or maybe a cheesy horror movie.
Still, I wasn't doing half-bad on that insane, chaotic day. I might have been on the receiving end of a Necromorph onslaught, true, but I certainly wasn't panicking. My modified M-5 Seeker Rifle was dismembering Necros with ease, and I’d settled into a comfortable routine of aiming and shooting. Given, I was low on ammo, but at least I was taking dozens of the ugly bastards with me. The squad of terrified security guards around me opted to blindly fire on full-auto with their pulse rifles, not even bothering to aim for the limbs of the charging nightmares, despite my insistence otherwise. I couldn’t blame them, really. I doubt their superiors told them about the Necromorphs in any great detail, sans for the useful of advice of “aim for the limbs”. Given their horrid accuracy, however, I had a feeling most them were asleep for that particular lecture.
I didn’t know how long the firefight had raged in that blood-stained hall. It could have been minutes, or well over an hour. It’s hard to tell in the heat of battle, and I wasn’t paying attention to clock on my HUD. Whatever the case, as the battle neared its crescendo, and the tide of Necromorphs threatened to finally overwhelm us with sheer numbers, everything began to shake violently. The Necromorphs immediately started backing away, rushing away from us in a veritable stampede, as if someone had flipped a switch in their brains (or what was left of them). I didn’t bother trying to shoot them, not with the floor shaking like it was. I didn't want a case of friendly fire marring my combat record, after all.
“Magnetize!” I shouted to stumbling the security team, “Magnetize your boots, dammit!” Despite their fear, my voice cracked through them like a whip, and the sound of magnetic boot soles clamping firmly to steel quickly filled the air. The vibrations were gradually worsening, but none of us were in danger of getting thrown to the ground. The heads-up display of my helmet informed me that the entire Government Sector was experiencing a massive power surge, and that several critical systems were in danger of failing, including life support. The lights on the ceiling rained sparks down on us as they shorted out, plunging the hall into almost total darkness.
Just when I thought it couldn't get any worse (I try to be an optimist), a bone-shaking explosion rocked the hall, just as a giant ball of white light appeared at the end of the hallway. It was incredibly bright, bright enough to force the visors of my helmet to darken in order to protect my eyes. The security guards around me began shouting and cursing, covering their heads with their arms as the light quickly began approaching us. I fired off a few rounds from my seeker rifle, though I quickly realised it was a waste of ammo. The bolts merely caused ripples in the surface of the blazing orb, doing nothing to stop, or even slow, its approach.
Like I said earlier: I knew I was a dead man in that hallway. Hell, I was a dead man as soon as the outbreak started. Everyone on the station was, and no amount of sweat and bullets was going to change that. At least I was going out with a bang. In my line of work, that’s all you can ask for, really. Well, besides retirement and fat pension check, that is.
I closed my eyes as the ball of light enveloped me. For a brief moment, I felt a searing pain flash through my body, followed swiftly by a welcome fall into merciful unconsciousness.
Finally, I remember thinking to myself, I deserve a damn rest.
Author’s Note: Well, if you’ve made it this far, congratulations. I can’t say I’m proud of this prologue, seeing as how it’s a pretty much a complete rough draft/ rush-job. This short prologue was born from a dare I made with a friend. He claimed, rather brazenly, that I couldn’t write a story that managed to transition from a heated battle that took place in the Dead Space universe, to My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic. When I told him, also rather brazenly, that I could, he gave me an hour to write him a prologue. The abomination you just read is the product of that. Lieutenant Ventralis is in desperate need of more characterization, bless him, and I fear the action scene could use a bit more flare. Well, besides the giant ball of light that appeared. Har-har.
Once I’d completed the prologue (with time to spare), my friend insisted that I upload it to FIMFiction for critique/comment...without editing beforehand. He’s a funny guy, my friend, but who was I to say no? Besides, I think it’s high time I uploaded a story for all to see. I mostly keep my work to myself, though this my first ever fanfiction, so I’m interested to see how I do.
Your opinions and critiques are, of course, welcome for this first-time endeavour. If you enjoy it enough, and want the adventures of Lieutenant Ventralis to continue, I will happily begin work on a first chapter, one not tainted by time constraints and brazen challenges. And, of course, it will have ponies. Many, many ponies.
-Wes
Comments ( 28 )
I want more!I see potental!I also see High Ratings!And Pinkie Pie!An-Wait Pinkie?!?!?![]()
Need moar. This has the capability of appearing on my "shit-the-bed-when-updates" list.
Can't say too much about it, as it's only the prologue, but I thoroughly enjoyed what's there. I like your style with the first person narrative.
This is a rough crossover to do right, so I haven't seen a lot of people try to take it on... I'm really curious to see where you'll take this.
Thank you. And you make a fair point about Dead Space/FiM crossovers. I decided, right off the bat, to not have Issac Clarke as the protagonist. I didn't want to risk pulling him out of character, or confusing people who haven't played the games. Now that I think of it, I won't be referencing the games in any great detail, after the prologue. I want to keep this as open as possible to potential readers.
Interesting premise AND beautifully written? Certainly looking forward to updates and editing of this supposed horrid prologue! Youve got a track my friend
I appreciate everyone taking the time to comment. When I first submitted this, I wasn't expecting such an overwhelmingly positive response!
Since everyone enjoyed this humble prologue, I will keep to my word, and begin work on a full-length, proper first chapter this weekend. I'll try to update regularly, but I'm going to keep a 'quality-over-quantity' approach to this story. I want to make sure the subsequent chapters continue to be worthy of your attention (and the flood of tracking notifications my Gmail inbox received. Lordy).
All of those 5 stars including my own, are mostly for the shear concept of this story, not the length nor quality (although is wasn't bad (actually quite good) by any stretch of the imagination).
I Think the majority of Bronies are also paradoxically dead space and horror fans.
You have my attention, but one thing I'm wondering is what this is a crossover of.
Dis is approved, now continue before the might of my...I don't know...shoe? Yeah, let's go with that...As I was saying, continue or face the might of my shoe of pain...and tolerance...
hmmm i like deadspace/mlp:fim crossovers but i dont see a high amount of good ones and the good one im reading NEVER UPDATES i will track and move on to the next few chapters and will give more input and most likely positive praise after ![]()
PS: awsome start![]()
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Not bad at all. Some minor grammar mistakes here and there, but those are minor details. Overall you did a good job at setting the story up. Don't feel bad about the "lack" of fleshing out the Ventralis. Save that for the rest of the story when we can see the man for who is based on his actions...Anyway I am super excited to read this!
Dead Space is one of my favorite games so I highly doubt that you can disappoint me.
Best of luck with your story!![]()
*Draws out Pulse Rifle*
*Reloads and aims ahead*
Ready for more Dead Space action! ![]()
You did a great job on the story intro, I didn't spot in grammar or spelling errors for a rough draft
ive got a question to every1 who knows the awnser. who will win in an epic battle between the necromphs of dead space or the flood of halo?







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