• Member Since 7th Dec, 2011
  • offline last seen Aug 24th, 2015

boredhooman


T

A great cataclysmic event is upon Equestria. Soon, all of the planet will be consumed in fire and death. Ponykind's only hope is to send Celestia's dearest student and her friends to an entirely new world and use the Elements of harmony to establish a link and help Equestria escape. But even with a formidable Royal Guard escort and the power of the Elements of Harmony, the chances of success are slim to none. But even the slimmest chance of survival is always preferable to certain death.

On Earth, Lance Corporal David Beckett of the USMC, a devoted husband and expectant father, just wants to survive his tour of duty in the Israeli/Syrian War and get home. Unfortunately, it won't be that simple.

Side story and partial sequel here: A New World, A New Threat: Of Their Own Accord, written by TheCrazyMan.

Chapters (4)
Comments ( 90 )

This is going to be good :pinkiehappy:

how do you manage to get 2,000 words in!? I can barely manage 700 without running out of ideas for a spot to stop at. :pinkiesad2:

My reaction to that "Aloha Snackbar" line:

Holy crap, that's so awful and so offensive and so hilarious. I gotta fave this. Well done, good sir!

S73

Well, this is new...

No really it is.

Seriously, holy flurking shnit is this unique. Most stories of this nature have things the other way round with humans fleeing to Equestria. I can't wait to see where this goes. Hopefully this will be: A. Accurate with respect to the military, B. Overall, a well written fic, C. Have humans not be dicks...

*Crosses Fingers and places into the "Read Later - Priority 2" pile

EDIT: Read it.

Good so far. Accurate to the best of my knowledge. My personal hope is that our pastel colored freinds difuse the situation so the two sides can get back to killing one another later, but looking at where this is going, Ima have to guess that violence is in the near future- which is fine, it IS your fic... I just hope that it is done well, that all the characters act logically, and that there will be a happy or at least bittersweet ending.

Ta.

Well, this is different, the ponies actually meet the people who oppose America. Wonder if they'll be convinced to hate America and its allies, given that they're gonna feed them only their perspective.

Oh, I like where this is going!

The story itself is well-written, though you could stand to dwell on character introductions a little bit more. You're very quickly throwing a lot of characters at us that we're supposed to remember. At least four marines, the Syrian captain, the pony captain... it gets a little muddled in there, particularly with the marines themselves.

Don't get me wrong... I like the characters you came up with. They seem distinct and interesting, and I could taste a little bit of 3-dimensionality in their attitudes and actions even this early on. Hopefully, coming chapters will expand upon their characters further.

The Syrians themselves reacted with such little surprise that it broke my suspension of disbelief, as well. While I certainly wouldn't expect them to suddenly freak out and shoot at everything that moves if they're trained soldiers, something like a bunch of technicolored horse aliens suddenly popping up in your living room will freak anyone out a little.

I wanted to see some panic, some shouting (not to be confused with shooting), some taking cover and directing weapons and waiting on a reaction... because that's what soldiers do when something unexpected pops up in a battlefield situation (especially one as desperate as these guys would be in, vastly outgunned while trying to fight off the US military). I'd expect the Syrian captain to calm the Syrian soldiers down, which would then establish a better reason in my head as to why Cloudhammer would be so trusting. I'd also expect the Syrian captain to be at least a little concerned or even dubious as to why this creature speaks English of all things. And, most of all, I expected Twilight to take over and say something, because she's the designate diplomat of the group, if I understood things correctly.

I assume you'll explain why the ponies can apparently speak English at a later time?

Also, I assume you meant something other than "...most looked malignant." when you were describing the Syrian citizens, considering the description that followed, which didn't make them sound malignant at all. Perhaps benign? Docile? Nonchalant?

Other than some minor issues, however, you have a solid idea here, with some seemingly solid characters writing to back it up. Celestia and Luna, I felt, were characterized rather well, and your suspenseful buildup as to what's going on that's forcing them to become this desperate was well executed. Again, my biggest issue with this is that a lot happened that I wanted to see expanded upon (that scene when the ponies first pop in most of all)... but you may have reasons as to why you didn't cover it fully this chapter.

Overall, I am thoroughly enjoying this, and I eagerly await your next addition to the story.

ALOHA SNAKCBAR!

:rainbowlaugh: As offensive as that was, I couldn't help but chuckle. More, please! :pinkiehappy:

wow not poped up on un forces thats new

The one word that can describe how I feel about this chapter. . .

ALLONS-Y!!

We must simply hope they make it before the Americans make a move

Me: To late, the Americans are here to secure the ponies and hopefully take them out of the war zone in into a more peaceful area I.e. the U.S.

2258423
images1.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20110927032924/mlp/images/6/6a/Discord_S02E02.png

2248754
Thanks for the in-depth comment. I'll work on those issues and clarify everything best I can in the next chapter.

2249793
u wot m8

2258443
So wait you planning that to happen or do the ponies take Syrian side of the conflict.

I like this so far!

But you got Cloudhammer's permission to use his OC, right?

2290498
Yup. I had a general request on the IRC a few weeks back but only Cloud responded in the positive.

Do you have any OCs? I still have 5 pony spots and X human spots left.

2290521
What kind of ponies? Are they all Royal Guards?

Oh and by the way, your story's already gotten a review.

2294112
Preferably Royal Guards. Any non-guards won't have a part until a lot farther ahead.

Like, epilogue. Possibly.

Also accepting humans. But again, military probably. For example, SG offered Russel from NA. He's on a mortar team, closest I could get to large artillery.

Hmm. Palestine side of that war. Not the most conventional start for a Equestria at War fanfic but. MOAR!!!! :flutterrage:

This ever going to be continued? I think the premise is great, and I'd love to see this continue.

2509887
Yes, it will be continued. I've just been taking a break from writing because of real life stuff.

2513559

Any idea when? I'd hate to see this die down.

2523079
Well I'm currently co-writing a collaboration with another author, so after I get that story's chapter down I will begin real work on this story.

As for this one, I have one scene written but it still needs to be polished. Other than that I have the outline done.

I really, really hope you write more of this.

Wow, this is gonna get dicey. Great action though!

I'm not gonna say anything for either side, but I will say that I love how you are presenting the point of view of the Syrian soldiers.

More please. :pinkiehappy:

Yes! This finally updated!

I knew it was a good idea to follow this, even if I had to wait a few months.

We often dehumanize our enemies. It's interesting how you're giving equal voice to the Syrians.

2741150>>2742700
That's part of what I wanted to do with this: people are people. If I took Yousef and Aali and had them as Joseph and Adam in the US Army, they would be the same character. If David was Dani in the Afghan National Army, he would still be the same guy.

There are different cultures, different nationalities, but overall the guy at the end of your sights is just as human as you are. Yet you have to kill him, that's part of what makes war suck. He is fighting for his country just as you are fighting for yours. You are fighting for your family, and he is fighting for his. You are both right, but only one of you are allowed to leave.

It's an impasse in the truest sense.

2743968 I agree in war both sides believe in what they are fighting for
this only proves good and evil are based on perspective of individuals, a "evil man" most of the time dose not believe he is evil

MOAR PLEASE! Seriously, the way you show the Syrians' side is unfortunately rare in the media these days, fanfic or otherwise. You've humanized them in a way I love! Just...try not to take so long with Chapter 3, kay?

What our enemies have feelings, impossible.

Luna raised an eyebrow. “Even the Changelings?”

“Yes, Luna,” Celestia said, an edge clearly present in her voice. “Even the Changelings. What a small number of them had done in no way deserves extinction.”

This made me feel warm and fuzzy inside :rainbowkiss:

Anyway, it looks like this is off to a promising start. A bit heavy on gun/military porn and a bit light on actual human/pony interaction for my taste, but I'll hold out for that to change.

Sorry, I realize this was late

2898475

This made me feel warm and fuzzy inside :rainbowkiss:

Yup. This is canon Celestia here. Genocide is a no-no.

Anyway, it looks like this is off to a promising start. A bit heavy on gun/military porn and a bit light on actual human/pony interaction for my taste, but I'll hold out for that to change.

Don't worry. We have a looong car ride with Twilight and First Fireteam.

Also the rest of the hoerses and captured Syrians.

If they have a week, and teleportation, they should be able to get a couple thousand of the foreign species to Equestria to evacuate.

The bare minimum for a species to survive long term is 5000, below that line and there's not enough genetic deviation. The Gene Pool is just to small.

Considering the gryphon's are made from a combo of two Hypercarnivores, scurvy should make them it's BITCH (as they should flat out be incapable of eating fruit.), which means if there are Gryphon's in Equestria, and the Griffin Kingdom is across the ocean, it's not a very big distance across the ocean.

Or since Equastria is on a land bridge between two larger landmasses, and both the northern and southern section balloon outwards, the northern part get's close enough the gryphon's can make the trip across, as the arrow to the gryphons on the map points to the northeast east.

Everygryphon who can should probably be gunning it for Equastria, since they can fly they might be able to get a few thousand over in a week, though far more then that would die on the trip.

The Zebra's are, however, screwed, Unless some form of teleport rune station is established for them.

3219215
Funny story. I wrote the outline to this story way before the Syrian shitstorm came to world-wide attention. I knew shit was happening, but still.

This is... pretty good. One hell of a place for the ponies to arrive in, though. Good on Twilight to be thinking like she is and not taking everything at face value.

3388539 B-but, don't you know the Americans are evil? They want to rape our women and steal our oilz. :rainbowwild:

Succession movements? In Equestria? Why? Equestria is booming. With tons of resources, a stable economy, it kind of seems to be going through an industrial revolution, with new techs being invented. Not to mention a goddess ruling the country and leading it into a state of peace that's lasted for hundreds of years. Such that you only have a token army.

And I liked the interaction between characters. Seemed realistic. I can't wait to see more of it.

3389436 I think it was sarcasm, as the :rainbowwild: emote indicates.

Wait, they stopped because of a flat tire? I don't know about you, but with three tires still functioning, I would vote to press on through the war zone to reach the base, especially if they were close. After all, Humvees have wheel inserts that will hold the vehicle up even if there isn't air in the tire:
warwheels.net/images/HumveeRunFlatsKeenan%20(1).JPG

In fact, the AM General spec sheet says you can go 30 miles at 30 mph this way.

3389451
Probably, but ma scars and missing leg don't find it funny...

3389462 Sorry if you're offended. But like Warthog pointed out: sarcasm.

3389490
Not offended, it's just annoying when someone says that and acts like I should hate the gov. just cuse I lost ma leg in the service.

3389523 When did I say you should hate the government?

The comment was pointing out how the Royal Guards just believed what the Syrians told them without question or evidence and how Twilight was doing the right thing by keeping an open mind.

3389592
Not you, I was visiting a buddy's grave today when I had an war protester start bothering me w/that shit. You just had bad luck of me reading that post in a pissy mood.

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