- Member Since 21st Jul, 2012
- offline last seen Saturday
Sparkler
Not the G1 Sparkler. Nor the G3.5 Sparkler. Nor the G4 Draft Sparkler. Nor the Winningverse Sparkler (even though she's awesome).
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definitely
Wow. This was pretty damn good! Both characters were believable, and the dialogue was nice.
I really like the way Vinyl still reads to me as a mare, but she's a stallion. It's really an interesting little thing that I'm really liking so far.
I am going to watch this. You wrote this whole part very nicely and gave a great setup. I really am anxious to see what you do with the juicier parts.
Oh, fuck you, you tremendous tease.
2098643
Thanks for the catch. I normally spellcheck the old fashioned way with FIMfics because all the pony-puns make spellcheckers throw their hooves up in disgust, but there's always some words like that that I just miss entirely...
2098764 Why, WHY! WHY DO YOU MAKE GOOD STORIES THAT MAKE ME FEEL HAPPY!
Interest piqued. I'll keep an eye on this.
huh ... well this is ... this is different ... different, odd and ... and surprisingly good for as easily as one could have botched it ... definitely worth faving
This is awesome! I can't wait for the next.
Oh, and fyi: having the 63 spell put on Octavia would make an even more awesome epilogue!
You tease.....
(Joke) Alt. Title: DJ Rul-3 $!x7y 7hr33: Eine Kleine Middle Klasse Musik
You're featured. Here's a song to "celebrate" it:
It's depressing to know that I'm the only one on this whole website who knows who The Rutles or Beatallica are. Le sigh or something.
Oh, you tease. This is quite good. I am eager for more.
WHERE IS CHAPTER 2?!?!?!
2102628 THATS MY PROFILE PICTURE RAAAGGEEEEE
2102747 i0.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/000/496/524/827.jpg
2102747 Oh, shit just got real now.
2102876 2102747
Come, now. Best Ponies shouldn't fight.
2102902 THEY STOLE MY AVATAR.
(Your story is fantastic, btw. Please continue or I will die!)
2103087 There, i like this one better anyways, and yes, this story is fantastic, please keep it up!
If Blueblood is the kind of pony who would make the DJ at his bachelor party get a sex change, I feel sorry for whomever he marries.
Spell 63... oh the possibilities!
.
Actually, this is probably the best possible use..
And then the spell wears off.
how soon do you think you'll have the sext part, if your doing it of corse. please do..
Now slap me with a sandbag and call me dusty, I liked this one! Intriguing story, character-driven, and so on and forth. In allez, I liked it. Follow + Like!
MOAR!
Overall pretty good.
You tease! Please make an epilogue or chapter 2 or something.
You know, I love how you made the entire set-up apply to an outside reason, yet made it work in the mature segment of this chapter. I could totally see Vinyl and Octavia doing this.
I haven't even read chapter two and I know I'll love it.
-SoI
I want to see this story continue! The relationship aspect from here on out would be very interesting.
I only want to know if Octavia will still love vinyl once she reforms back to a mare and continue a relationship, or break vinyls heart
Commence read.
Error?
I really hope tavi doesn't break vinyls heart, I hope she eventually finds feelings for vinyl as the mare she is, and not just want her as COL-7 ( plus it would be nice to see Octavia x vinyl clop lol )
I'd say you did a great job for your first time writing clop.
My only complaints would be a few grammar mistakes here and there, and that I personally felt that Vinyl's infatuation with Octavia wasn't very clear. I dunno, it may have been present in the first chapter, but if it was, I didn't pick up on it. Also, you kept referring to Octavia as 'charcoal' or 'black', which was kind of confusing when you're seeing it in your mind's eye.
Still, I really enjoyed reading this. Goodness knows everyone loves a good genderbending fic.
Not bad for your first time writing clop, certainly better than anything I'd do.
I hope that, if this continues, you explore the relationship post-spell. Or maybe Vinyl, desperate to keep Tavi's attention, spends all of the money she made to stay a stallion. That'd be pretty intriguing.
All in all, not bad. Felt a bit fast when the actual intercourse started, but then again they'd been teasing each other all night, so...
I think you accidentally the sentence there.
I laughed at this. Shameless clop humor is best humor.
You do realize a colt is a child male pony and a stallion is an adult pony, right?
2105452 Vinyl seems to be referred to as a stallion when it comes to talking about gender, so I imagine it's a bit like how you might sometimes call someone 'boy', even if they're a grown man. That's my guess, anyways. Also, DJ Stall10n doesn't look as cool.
2105452
It's really no different to how we use boy as slang for a man. For example, "Boy, why you so late for dinner?" Therefore colt for ponies can probably be used as slang for stallion.
I always like clop better when it's about love, not just bucking. Well done.
I wish I could find more orchestral techno. Yours sounds like a great listen.
2105839
I was listening to a lot of music while writing this, because it was often the only way to get unstuck. Musical influences for that fictional track:
Spin That Record Vinyl Scratch (Nightcore) - the basics of 'cantercore' and DJ PON-3's stage persona
Ein kleine nachtmuzik - eminently danceable, inspiring the "pegasi in flight" sections. And source of a shameless pun.
Pachebel's Canon - another upbeat part of the musical canon, which is often played with cello and which has been translated to more recent genres many times.
Morning in the Jungle (Trance) - the use of 'thunderstorms' in a song.
"Sexy revenge is the best revenge."
Truer words from the Kama Sutra: Sun Tzu edition, have never been spoken.
I am really liking this story. Romantic clop is truly the best clop. Now I'll admit that the shameless sloppy stuff isn't always bad and there are a few good ones floating about out there, but stories like this one have the passion and honest love that make romantic clop my favorite type of clop.
Now I have the happy face!
Your interpretation of Vinyl is spot on, being dorky when not on duty, but should she be on duty, she's on another level of reality. Brilliant.
I did catch a few spots of redundancy in your vocabulary but other than that, it was well done. I'm moving on to chapter 2.
So, if everything works as it should, does that mean foals?
I agree with the pony who commented 'MOAR'
MOAR is definitely needed! Great story!
I've got one issue here, and one alone:
You often use the word "drug" as a past-tense for "drag". To drug something is to dose it with drugs. I believe the word you're looking for is "dragged".
2107319
I actually had to look that up!
It appears that when 'drag' appeared in English in the 15th century, some groups adopted it as a strong verb, and others as a weak verb. I grew up hearing it as a strong verb, but apparently it's a weak verb in most of the world.
It feels weird to realize it's wrong but to not think of it as wrong...
Odd as buck to see a mare change into a stallion, hopefully it does not last though. Impressive that's for sure and seriously well written, I enjoyed this and you have a very great pairing here....love it
Is there a Sense in German Titles?
I'm Naturally German, and I have no idea what a Nachtkore shall be, neither in German nor in English.
The Second one does not make much sense at all. Sense would make: Was die Mode Teilt. Or what I believe you wanted to say is Streng Geteilt maybe with a nach Klassen at the end.
Sry that I only criticize yet, I'm not even finished with your first chapter
Hope you keep going
2098643 ICWATUDIDTHAR...