Featured In4

More Stories1

  • T Stone Parasprites

    Apple Bloom keeps a journal for school that winds up describing a horror found in Ponyville.
    43,113 words · 643 views  ·  22  ·  3
  • ...
 158
 3,590
Source

As a Royal Princess, it is Luna's responsibility to watch over the subjects in her kingdom. One of the ways she helps the common pony is to inhabit their nightmares, helping them to overcome their fears and anxieties in order to live stronger the next day. However, one night Luna steps into the dreams of a young filly and finds out that the pony is dying. With nopony else able to help the child, the Royal Princess realizes that she has no other choice but to help. Can Luna save the filly walking the line between life and death?

First Published
3rd Feb 2013
Last Modified
6th Sep 2013
#1 · 89w, 3d ago · · · Waiting in the Rain ·

This is already looking promising, I can't wait to see more!

#2 · 89w, 3d ago · · · Waiting in the Rain ·

The concept caught my interest I look forward to reading further. The first chapter was well done.

#4 · 86w, 3d ago · · · A Cup of Tea ·

ZOMBIES!:pinkiegasp:

#5 · 86w, 3d ago · · · Waiting in the Rain ·

Great concept and well-written.

Have a Spike for the Tomb Raider reference. :moustache:

#6 · 86w, 3d ago · · · A Cup of Tea ·

Twilight Sparkle, eat your heart out.

#7 · 86w, 3d ago · · · Fade to Black ·

Oh damn....

#8 · 86w, 3d ago · · · Fade to Black ·

>>2168985

Never played a Tomb Raider game. If anything, the first chapter is an homage to My Neighbor Totoro. Then again, I haven't seen that either, but I at least know of its iconic image.

#9 · 86w, 3d ago · · · A Cup of Tea ·

:moustache: Told you Twilight.

#10 · 86w, 2d ago · · · A Cup of Tea ·

Wonderful! I love your depiction of Luna's 'dream-vision', it feels like something straight out of a Hollywood movie. ^^

#11 · 86w, 2d ago · · · Fade to Black ·

Gah, what a cliffhanger! Really looking forward to more. :)

#12 · 86w, 1d ago · · · Fade to Black ·

>>2169014  That's how I pictured it, actually, was the little girl waiting for the bus in the rain, from 'Totoro'.

#13 · 85w, 8h ago · · · Fade to Black ·

I haven't even finished the third paragraph and I've got it favorited and liked.

#14 · 85w, 7h ago · · · Fade to Black ·

... And then I read the rest. Holy crap, man, good story. I absolutely cannot wait to read more.

#15 · 85w, 7h ago · · · Waiting in the Rain ·

I know you say that the filly in this story has a green coat and blonde mane, but I imagine her as the filly from Super Filly Adventure

#16 · 85w, 7h ago · · · A Cup of Tea ·

Z-z-z-Zombie pony? :fluttershbad::raritydespair::ajbemused:

#17 · 85w, 4h ago · · · Waiting in the Rain ·

Was this chapter a Totoro tribute?:pinkiehappy:

#18 · 85w, 3h ago · · · Waiting in the Rain ·

Very interesting story!:yay:

#19 · 85w, 1h ago · · · Fade to Black ·

Love the idea. Adding to favorites!

#20 · 84w, 6d ago · · · Fade to Black ·

Damned. GO LUNA! HELP NOVELLA!

#21 · 84w, 6d ago · · · Waiting in the Rain ·

>>2220460

Maybe. Go Totoro:yay:

#22 · 84w, 6d ago · · · Fade to Black ·

:flutterrage: MORE MOAR

#23 · 84w, 6d ago · · · Fade to Black ·

Thumbed up, favorited, and watched.

#24 · 84w, 6d ago · · · Fade to Black ·

Congrats on the EQD feature!

#25 · 84w, 6d ago · 3 · · Waiting in the Rain ·

This is a lovely story. I like the idea, and your writing style is very clear and consice. This is one of the few stories I've seen where not a single word was wasted.

There is only one error in the text: you use "lied" instead of "lay" in the sentence, "Luna saw where the filly's enthusiasm lied, and wanted her to use it in any way she could."

#26 · 84w, 6d ago · · · Fade to Black ·

In one colt's dream, the princess came face to face with crystal zombies, whose hard skin made them impossible to destroy. That child had issues.

That was the part that made me fall out of my seat. Although the cliffy end of the chapter is a bit sad, I really like splashes of humor added in like that. Great work on the story!

#27 · 84w, 6d ago · · · Fade to Black ·

>>2169014

...My Neighbor Totoro. Then again, I haven't seen that either....

This is something you should correct.  In fact, you should watch as many Miyazaki films as you can lay your hands on.

#28 · 84w, 6d ago · 1 · · Fade to Black ·

>>2224571 I put that line in there because I was the one who dreamed about crystal zombies. Nice little in-joke.

>>2224699 Haven't seen MNT, but I've very familiar with Miyazaki. I love Spirited Away and Kiki's Delivery Service.

#29 · 84w, 6d ago · · · Clear ·

Yes

#30 · 84w, 6d ago · 1 · · Clear ·

And now, for the obvious Inception joke.

WE NEED TO GO DEEPER

Also, nice touch with Doggieville:rainbowlaugh: I see what you did there:raritywink: same goes for the tidal wave:twistnerd:

#31 · 84w, 6d ago · 3 · · Clear ·

Luna raised an eyebrow. “Doggieville?” The name sounded silly – the kind of name that would only appear in a story intended for children.

You sir win.

#32 · 84w, 6d ago · · · Clear ·

Sir, I have to say I really enjoy this work.  Not only does it deal with an important aspect of Luna, but also with a really dark and gritty reality of something she might actually have to face.  Your writing is also phenomenal for the small amount of words you use.  This could easily be longer, but the short length works just as well. Bravo! :moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache:

#33 · 84w, 6d ago · · · Clear ·

That's Story so COOL! And Novelle is Save *YAY*:yay::pinkiehappy:

#34 · 84w, 5d ago · 5 · · Clear ·

My word.  Luna kept watching past the end of My Little Pony and went straight into Pound Puppies.  And why isn't there a Luna emoticon?

#35 · 84w, 5d ago · · · Clear ·

Hahaha, a German Shepard named Jerry, I'm surprised he's a baker and not a machinist:derpytongue2:

#36 · 84w, 5d ago · · · Clear ·

Holy crap!  This is one of the most amazing fanfics I've ever read, and that's saying something!

Comment posted by amacita deleted at 9:23pm on the 10th of March, 2013
Comment posted by amacita deleted at 9:23pm on the 10th of March, 2013
Comment posted by amacita deleted at 9:23pm on the 10th of March, 2013
Comment posted by amacita deleted at 9:23pm on the 10th of March, 2013
Comment posted by amacita deleted at 9:23pm on the 10th of March, 2013
Comment posted by amacita deleted at 9:23pm on the 10th of March, 2013
#43 · 84w, 5d ago · · · Clear ·

I can summarize this chapter into two words: Pound Puppies

#44 · 84w, 5d ago · · · Clear ·

I reallh like the story so far, its cool

#45 · 84w, 5d ago · · · Clear ·

>>2227234 Luna is in a dream and it sometimes says that she is daydreaming while still in the the dream. so you have a dream within a dream. "we need to go deeper."

#46 · 84w, 5d ago · · · Clear ·
#47 · 84w, 5d ago · · · Clear ·

I hope this ends well.:fluttershysad:

#48 · 84w, 4d ago · 2 · · Clear ·

Did someone (Celestia?) in the real word threw a bucket of water at Luna?

#49 · 84w, 1d ago · · · Clear ·

This is the most AWESOME story ever

Have a 'stache:moustache:

[

#50 · 83w, 3d ago · · · Fade to Black ·

DUNN DUN DUNNNNNNN

0 81282 396327
Login or register to comment