Hello. I do things every now and then. Also, ponies.
Berry Punch is the proud owner of the Punch Bowl, Ponyville's one and only drinking establishment. Outwardly, things are going very well, but appearences aren't always accurate. And unfortunately for Berry, sometimes things get worse before they get better.
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I've had this sitting around in a state of partial completion for several months now, and I finally decided to polish it up and publish it. Feedback is greatly appreciated, as always. Also, this story has no relation to "A Pony Walks Into A Bar"; I began work on my story a loooong time before I saw that in the featured box.
I sincerely hope you don't mind, but I have this nasty habit of proofreading in my head as I read along. I think I'll go ahead and do it here, if you don't mind terribly
(Just to note, I don't spy nearly enough grammatical errors for it to be an issue to most readers, I'm just looking to give you a spot of help; no offense intended!)
(those darn possessive apostrophes always trip me up.)
This is hardly worth mentioning, but remember: When making a list, always use colons.
Like I said, little things. They don't really make a difference, but I know some authors appreciate it, myself included
On to the actual story. My God. Flawless. A perfect dip-in to the life of a pony outside of the limelight who has to deal with everyday concerns. At its heart nothing more than a simple story of a random act of kindness, but still so well done. Your vocabulary is expansive and doesn't grow tiring, your descriptions nearly perfect in length and haste, so as not to bore us with the details, and your grammar pretty much perfect. Better than mine, I have no doubt. So, while this may seem like a simple story, I still say good job and I'm glad to have read.
~THD
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I appreciate the grammar help, every little bit counts. And I am very glad you enjoyed it, it was very fun to write.
Wow, thanks so much!
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And that's awesome, nothing's more important than to enjoy what you're writing.
Glad I could be of help!
Berry Punch is best pony.
The having her send letters to Luna felt stilted, but the rest flowed well and gave nice insight to Berry Punch.
And, of course, all the backgrounders know each other. Octavia is rather inspirational at times, isn't she?
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Thanks for pointing that out. And thanks for taking the time to comment!
Hm. Yeah, that was a little over the top, wasn't it.
I finally got to read this story.
Good work and a good read.
A nice little fic with a good message and good writing. Thanks for the read!
This was an amazing little story.
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Thank you! I'm glad you all enjoyed it.
1435441 It'd be awesome if you'd make a sequal.
I want to see a Mop-Ninja story. Like now.
Also, I love the world you've created here. It's rich and fully. I love the hints of back stories you've given everyone. And I hope Derpy gets sober. Goodness knows stopping cold turkey is difficult. I'd love to see more stories in this world you've created.
And I love that you made Berry Punch more then just a drinker. She's a bartender here. Nice change of pace. Head Canon accepted. I wonder where her mother went? Sounds like she abandoned her or she died.
Again, excellent hints at back story.
I had all da feels.
Well played my friend. I look forward to more in this little world of Berry Punch letter to Luna you've set up. True, it did seem a tad stilted, but you recovered very quickly and made it work.
So in short hand:
files.sharenator.com/moar10-s750x600-263864.jpg
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Wow, thanks! I did try really hard to flesh it out, so I'm glad you picked up on that! I'll do my best to keep it up in future side stories.