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Mystic

Joined November 2011
470 followers

Groups

Stories (9)

  • As the Sun Sets
    A trip to see the dragons sets in motion a chain of events that leaves Twilight and Celestia in a desperate struggle against ancient evils long thought defeated. Something dark is stirring in the east...

    40,819 words · 2,290 views · 296 likes · 3 dislikes
  • Dancing on Silver Strings
    Celestia and Discord struggle in a psychological battle.
    11,757 words · 3,961 views · 283 likes · 6 dislikes
  • The Sun Whispers Your Name
    Twilight and Luna enter a dreamworld to rescue an unconscious Princess Celestia.
    32,094 words · 7,462 views · 539 likes · 17 dislikes
  • Perfect the Way You Are
    I will always love you, Derpy. You are perfect the way you are.
    5,453 words · 6,104 views · 184 likes · 4 dislikes
  • All Paths Lead Home
    109,814 words · 2,079 views · 127 likes · 2 dislikes
  • Only a Choice
    9,430 words · 530 views · 53 likes · 1 dislikes
  • Hell's Traitor
    32,046 words · 850 views · 58 likes · 2 dislikes
  • Evicted
    4,482 words · 1,177 views · 120 likes · 8 dislikes
  • Epic Ponies Doing Epic Things
    9,615 words · 877 views · 37 likes · 2 dislikes

Blog Posts (45)

Source

When Twilight is given the opportunity to travel with Princess Celestia on what appears to be a regular dignitary’s trip to see the dragons, she’s ecstatic. After all, nopony has seen the dragon kingdom in over a hundred years.

But they are not alone on the journey; there are rumours being carried on the wind, hushed whispers of something stirring in the east...

Their presence reignites an ancient chain of events that will see Twilight racing for help in the darkest places on earth and the princess struggling to reconcile her role in the world, surrounded on all sides by enemies she thought defeated millennia ago.

The clock is ticking. Time is running out, and the sun has already begun to set...

(Cover art by the amazing xX-Mr-No-Name-Xx)

Featured on EqD!

First Published
6th Jan 2013
Last Modified
18th Mar 2013

Comments ( 188 )

#1 · Chapter 2 · 90w, 3d ago · · ·

This is epic. NB4 featured, definitely. I look forward to more!

#2 · Chapter 2 · 90w, 3d ago · · ·

Oh boi here we go! This looks promising :rainbowwild:

Great. Have all of my thumbs, you know how much I adore Twilestia, and I can already feel this will be epic.

I have a question though, regarding the lenght of this. How many chapter are you planning to have, approximately?

#3 · Chapter 2 · 90w, 3d ago · 3 · 5 ·

Added to the "to read" list :pinkiehappy:

#4 · Chapter 2 · 90w, 3d ago · 1 · ·

Ah'm fairly certain the second line in ya' synopsis was used ta' describe Mordor.

#5 · Chapter 2 · 90w, 3d ago · · ·

You never fail to captivate me with your words, Mystic. Can't wait to see how this turns out!

-JJ2

#6 · Chapter 1 · 90w, 3d ago · · ·

I see the beginnings of NMM here.

Also: Moriath. That name made me think of Morgoth, the true dark lord from LotR.

#7 · Chapter 2 · 90w, 3d ago · · ·

Just curious, Mystic: how long are you planning this one to be?

>>1914972 It almost feels to me like that is the point, considering that the second additional tag on EqD's post is 'Tolkien is my god'.

#8 · Chapter 2 · 90w, 3d ago · · ·

It was part of the agreements made in the second age.
Yes, I am receiving very strong LotR vibes now.

Twilight sighed. She had more questions than she could count (she knew that because, for a moment, she had tried to list them in her head in order of importance).
I really liked this section. It feels veryTwilight.

Luna raised an eyebrow. “Do not grow complacent in the shadow of the east, Sister. You of all ponies

“And I haven’t. But it is nothing anymore. Just a shadow.”

It seems like something got cut out here...

I can already tell that this is going to be amazing. This is something I only do rarely, so when I do, it really counts.

MOAR!!!

#9 · Chapter 2 · 90w, 3d ago · · ·

I love epic storytelling like this, and your style does not disappoint!:twilightsmile:

#10 · Chapter 2 · 90w, 3d ago · · ·

This seems very interesting, and I look forward to what you have in store!

#11 · Chapter 2 · 90w, 3d ago · · ·

"The clock is ticking. Time is running out, and the sun has already begun to set..."

Getting 'Eternal' vibes from that. Haven't read it yet, gotta' wait 'til I get home from work, lol. I'm crossing my fingers for Twilight and Celestia going on an adventure together, and not Celestia getting tied up with this-and-that and Twilight having to go off adventuring without Celestia. Twilight never gets to adventure with her mentor. :twilightangry2:

#12 · Chapter 2 · 90w, 3d ago · · ·

Luna raised an eyebrow. “Do not grow complacent in the shadow of the east, Sister. You of all ponies

I think you accidentally the end of this sentence. :derpytongue2:

Anyway, this is certainly shaping up to be a really interesting story. I'm looking forward to more.

#13 · Chapter 2 · 90w, 3d ago · 1 · 1 ·

I'm sorry, if I were an EqD pre-reader, I would've waited for more before I accepted it. It's a good start and all, but usually stories of this caliber tend to burn out before they're finished, or usually don't hold what it promised.

Spots of telling here and there, maybe rephrasing of some things to make it a bit more eye pleasing. The block of italics smack in the middle of things makes me wonder is it a flashback or thought? That and it's kind of stylistically ugly, imho.

UPDATE: I must've angered someone with my blasphemy.

#14 · Chapter 2 · 90w, 3d ago · · ·
#15 · Chapter 2 · 90w, 3d ago · · ·

Haven't begun reading yet, but tell me. Do the go on this trip alone? Just the two of them? A Goddess-Princess of Equestria and her personal student and a wielder if the most powerful artifact in the world? Going into another kingdom on a possibly dangerous diplomatic trip? Without a huge contingent of guards? Seems legit.

If they do not go alone, then I'll gladly read it, because Twilestia is indeed bestia. :pinkiehappy:

#16 · Chapter 2 · 90w, 3d ago · · ·

That is likely the best story summary I've ever read on FIMF. :rainbowderp: This is most definitely going in my "read later" list.  I'd read it now, but I have over a hundred in that list already. :raritydespair:  If the story itself is half as hair-raising as the summary, you've got yourself a winner.

#17 · Chapter 1 · 90w, 3d ago · · ·

A wonderful start.  Glad to be reading another adventure story from you, Mystic.

#18 · Chapter 2 · 90w, 3d ago · · ·

Excited, loved your previous story in this universe, can't wait for more.

#19 · Chapter 2 · 90w, 3d ago · · ·

>>1915397

The great and powerful Varanus enjoys this work. Only good things can come of this.

>>1915424

That's what grabbed my attention, at first. The "Twilight +1 Adventure" and "Fun in the land of Dragons" gave me a Off the Edge of the Map/Apotheosis tickle. Opposite order, of course.

To the author: I kinda hate to start off by comparing your to other authors. Everyone should be appreciated for their own work. I even bitched someone out for that very thing once months back, so my apologies. I haven't even read the chapters yet, so please understand I was merely going by the description. Props to the cover artists, too. You're definitely going in my "read later" list. There are now 43 stories in there, but I'll likely bump yours up in the queue.

#20 · Chapter 2 · 90w, 3d ago · · ·

“Do not grow complacent in the shadow of the east, Sister. You of all ponies

“And I haven’t. But it is nothing anymore. Just a shadow.”

Your sentence seems to have lost its head.:pinkiehappy:

#21 · Chapter 1 · 90w, 3d ago · · ·

Wow. I am very impressed with your writing style; I haven't read anything with that intricacy of detail for a long time.

The writing alone would make me want to track this fic, but the concept also makes me curious. *tracks*

#22 · Chapter 2 · 90w, 3d ago · · ·

Adventure.

I like it.

#23 · Chapter 2 · 90w, 3d ago · · ·

An adventure to a Kingdom of Dragons, that Twilight sees as not being dangerous and she doesn't think to bring Spike:facehoof: Sorry that just broke the SOD for me I don't think I'll be continuing.

#24 · Chapter 2 · 90w, 3d ago · · ·

I'm looking forward to the new adventure as 'The Sun Whispers your name'  Is one of my all-time favorites. I hope this one is as epic as the previous however I get the feeling of a much longer story to be told.  I look forward to this tale of epic proportion.

#25 · Chapter 2 · 90w, 3d ago · · ·

>>1914874 Featured? This will never get featured! What are you--oh my God you're right. I think I might be in shock, haha. I hope you like what's to come!

>>1914877 How many chapters? Hmm, somewhere between fifteen and twenty, I reckon. I'm currently cutting/adding a lot of stuff, so it's hard to say for sure. I hope you enjoy it!

>>1914936 Be sure to let me know what you think! :twilightsmile:

>>1914972 Hehe, lot's of LoTR influences in this one!

>>1914985 Thank you! I'm thrilled to hear you like it!

>>1915000 If you think that, you would probably be right, haha.

>>1915087 Pretty long. I have about 160k words done so far, though I would guess that only about 130k of those will make the cut. Still got a handful of chapters left to write too.

>>1915159 Hehe, thank you! I'm thrilled to hear you're enjoying it!

>>1915160 Thank you! I'm glad you like it!

>>1915397 Thank you very much! I'm looking forward to sharing it!

>>1915424 That's what I thought too, haha. There is so much wonderful stuff that can be done with Celestia's character, especially on an adventure like this one.

>>1915431 Good catch! The upload must have derped. Thank you very much for reading! :twilightsmile:

>>1915443 Haha, then it should please you to know that this story is almost finished (as far as the first draft is concerned, anyway). And yes, the italics is a flashback.

>>1915547 No, they do not travel alone. A set of guards go with them on their journey. If you read it, I really hope you enjoy it!

>>1915595 Heh, that's the reaction I was hoping for! I hope you like it! :twilightsmile:

>>1915688 Thank you very much!

>>1915730 I hope you enjoy it!

>>1915822 Well, to be fair, Daetrin's work has always been a huge inspiration for me! I love that style of adventure to pieces.

>>1916094 I have indeed! :S Thanks for the catch!

>>1916383 Thank you very much for reading, and I'm thrilled to hear you're enjoying it!

>>1916420 Thank you!

>>1916615 I actually had a scene where Spike explained why he didn't want to go, but it was long and horrendously boring, so I cut it out of the final draft. The real reason he's not in the story is because, as a writer, I don't feel like I can do anything interesting with his character. He's just not someone who I enjoy writing, honestly.

>>1917306 Oh, it will be much longer and much better, I hope! I have improved a lot since then!

#26 · Chapter 2 · 90w, 3d ago · · ·

>>1917569

I'm always right. ALWAYS.

#27 · Chapter 2 · 90w, 3d ago · · ·

"Not only was she going on an adventure with Princess Celestia, but it wasn’t one that was life-threatening or paramount to Equestria’s ongoing survival! Instead, it was going to be educational!"

Oh Twilight! If only you knew.

#28 · Chapter 2 · 90w, 3d ago · · ·

Oh boy! I've been waiting fervently for this.

Absolutely loved The Sun Whispers Your Name, still one of my favorites on this site. Can't wait to read this one!

My "fics that I need to read right this second" list is growing alarmingly large.

:twilightoops:

#29 · Chapter 2 · 90w, 3d ago · · ·

Wow, you're pretty good at this, you certainly deserve to be a proof reader!

I one day hope to rise up as high as you! :twilightsmile:

#30 · Chapter 2 · 90w, 3d ago · · ·

>>1917980 Hehe, she's in for something special!

>>1918089 I hope you enjoy it! :twilightsmile:

>>1918173 Thank you very much! I say the secret is to practice, practice, practice!

#31 · Chapter 2 · 90w, 3d ago · · ·

>>1917569

Did you already forget that I'm prone of nagging and asking stupid, overly detailed questions? :twilightsmile:

#32 · Chapter 2 · 90w, 3d ago · 2 · ·

What the dick is this shit? Did anyone even edit it?

<3

Grats on the feature!

#33 · Chapter 2 · 90w, 2d ago · · ·

>>1918535 They're the best kind of questions! Haha.

>>1918808 No one ever wants to edit for me. :( They see my writing then laugh and run away all noodly-armed.

#34 · Chapter 1 · 90w, 2d ago · · ·

>>1915000You too?

AuAurvandil? I see what you did there. It was very clever too:twilightsmile:

#35 · Chapter 2 · 90w, 2d ago · · ·

Wait a minute.

Trouble brewing in the east where a dark land of evil rests?

Some sort of evil dude named Moriath?

The use of a names which was a variant of the name that inspired Earendil, master of the morning star?

Are you trying to remind of J.R.R Tolkien?

If so, keep it up!

#36 · Chapter 2 · 90w, 2d ago · · ·

>>1918956 Haha, there is a reason why one of the EqD tags is 'Tolkien is my god'!

#37 · Chapter 2 · 90w, 2d ago · · ·

>>1918960I didn't see the EqD post... but that does explain a lot!:pinkiehappy:

#38 · Chapter 2 · 90w, 2d ago · · ·

>>1918960Also, is this a sequel perhaps? Because I am not sure what this refers to:

“I would like that, actually,” Twilight said. She had spent more and more time with the the princess since their adventure into Luna’s mind, but she still hadn’t seen her for several weeks.

#39 · Chapter 2 · 90w, 2d ago · · ·

>>1918995 It's not really a sequel, but it does take place in the same narrative universe to one of my old stories, The Sun Whispers Your Name. There is a link to it in the description!

#40 · Chapter 2 · 90w, 2d ago · · ·

>>1918995

Read full description.

#41 · Chapter 2 · 90w, 2d ago · · ·

>>1919005Ah okay!Looks like I have some more reading material!:pinkiehappy:

#42 · Chapter 2 · 90w, 2d ago · · ·
#43 · Chapter 2 · 90w, 2d ago · · ·

>>1919005>>1919015Oh yeah! I remember that story. I read the first chapter and gave a thumb up but as I got caught up with story updates, I forgot about it:derpytongue2:.Well, might as well restart it.

#44 · Chapter 2 · 90w, 2d ago · · ·

>>1917569

Then you might want to go back and take a look at that scene and see what you can do to smooth it out because it seems like you just decided that all the other characters don't exist. There is no reaction to the fact that their friend is going on a long trip to a kingdom of creatures that they have only met rogue's from you would think they might be a tiny bit worried don't you think. I'm only saying this because I do think this fic has potential to be very good but if you just ignore other characters even if its just for a brief scene to explain why they won't be coming especially if the character has legitimate canonical reasons to come it makes the story seem rather shallow. This is just my opinion of course but these are the reasons why i'm not continuing, good luck with the rest of your endevours :twilightsmile:

#45 · Chapter 2 · 90w, 2d ago · · ·

>>1919005

I am confused. The Princess asks Twilight to accompany her to the dragon lands, citing her previous expedition to the dragon migration. This is all well and good, but why did NEITHER of them think to invite :moustache:? He didn't actually get to learn anything from the episode, except that Teenagers are Jerks and adult dragons don't watch their kids. It would be an amazing learning experience for him, particularly if Celestia cannot admit that she is worried for his safety. Moreover, once the adventure gets rolling, he would be a dragon (albeit a youngling) amongst dragons in the service of ponies: a source of intelligence and stealth that cannot be rivaled. Even if things don't turn up pear-shaped, bringing him along would still be a good idea politically if dragons have any empathy at all for their young.

This needs to be addressed. If you decide to include him, just don't introduce his parents. No need for that common plot-device.

#46 · Chapter 2 · 90w, 2d ago · · ·

>>1918248

AND she takes the time to read through all of her comments, and respond to them one, by one.

Awesome.

#47 · Chapter 1 · 90w, 2d ago · 1 · ·

Is it 'Moriath' or 'Moraith'? You used both in the prologue, and you only said his name twice total, so I can't go with the one used more, lol.

#48 · Chapter 2 · 90w, 2d ago · · ·

>>1919830 All I'll say is, when you see the type of story this is, you will understand completely why Spike isn't here, haha.

>>1919834 I still get excited that I get any comments at all! Haha.

>>1919901 Oops, definitely 'Moriath'. Fixed that, haha.

#49 · Chapter 2 · 90w, 2d ago · · ·

Great setup to what's looking like an amazing story. :rainbowkiss:

#50 · Chapter 2 · 90w, 2d ago · · ·

>>1919966 Thank you very much! It should be a fun ride.

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