14
148
174
Joined November 2011
150
1,927
How far would you go for love? Would you travel across the world? Face peril whatever the danger? Even sacrifice your own being? Rainbow Dash will have to answer these questions as she tries to find a forbidden mirror to bring back the one she both loved and lost. But at what price will it be?
Originally publish in 01-15-12. This story has been rewritten.
Okay, so I am successfully distracting myself from the depressive mood here by finding a plot hole and diving in.
Effectively - Cyrus gives them an out. He asks them to give him a reason not to kill them. And Rainbow Dash uses that as a moment to play the lovestruck fool and instead _merely asks that she be killed_.
They are _both_ national heroes. They are _both_ best friends with the personal student of one of the reigning Diarchs. They _both_ may or may not be in semi-regular contact with that same diarch (depending on when this is set). They are _both_ Elements of Harmony/Bearers of the same. Lastly, the other reigning Diarch _owes them her life_. Any of these, on their own, would be a good reason to not kill them. Taken together, their death would effectively book their murderer a one way ticket to the _sun_.
So why does Dash not mention any of these? Why does she attempt to appeal to the softer side of a criminal, a person who, in the course of their profession would become, and even demonstrated that they are, callous gits? I know Dash isn't the smartest pony on the block, but surely even she can recognise that the threat of divine retribution is greater incentive than emotional pleas?
When i first read the origional "Wings of sacrifice"
i thought to my self that there was not a single better story on this entire site... I eagerly and impatiently waited for every chapter... and when i heard you were rewriting it i nearly tore my house apart 
Now that i have read this new and improved remake... i cant help but be excited for the upcomming chapters! this is my favorite story on fimfiction and as i said the last chapter.... if you say this isent good enaugh... im gunna go on a murderous rampage 
You know, when i read the first draft of this story, i loved it, absoulutley loved it. When i found out you were re-writing it, i felt distraught, i felt like telling you that you were in the progress of making a brilliant story and re-writing it will just ruin it, but i didn't.
Im glad i didn't, This draft has SO much more emotion and detail written into it, much more so then it did, and i NEVER thought i'd say this, but i love this re-write.
I honestly can't wait for the next chapters, this has to be 1 of the best story's i have ever had the pleasure of reading. I wish more stories were written in this caliber. 
Now, im just anticipating the new/old chapters to be re-written, that, i am looking forward too.
Well, i have too thank you for such a great story (even though unfinished) 
Forever a fan
~ Dashing 
I read the original version of this story. It was deathly saddening to read that Applejack died from falling off the cliff. 
Now reading the new version of the story, it isn't only deathly saddening again, but I just can't help but get pissed off at Cyrus. You picked a smart, cold thief for the leader (great choice by the way). The only thing I can't ever picture, even if reading it in this story, is Rainbow "mercy killing" Applejack. It may be my opinion, but I kind of preferred the original version of Applejack's death. Still, the story is brilliantly written, as well as emotionally inducing. Can't wait to read the next, new version of this story. I do hope it will turn out like the original with Rainbow in Grydon and I saw Gilda in there as well. Meeting of two ex-best friends, still interesting. 
Emotions get the better of people in dire situations.
And she was juxtaposing her own life with Applejacks. "Shes honest, caring" implies RDs lazy and apathetic (although we already knew that); "Shes got a family that cares so much for ger that I'm even jealous" implies RD's family isnt and probably hasnt been there for her for a while. Shes just ruling of reasons as to why killing Applejack would be the least immoral desicion, and why she would be the more appropriate candidate to be slain.
Also, the gryphons are already wanted in their own country, so maybe RD figured the "diplomatic" aproach wouldnt be as effective as an emotional one.
Or maybe Im just reading too far into this; Its late, Im sleep deprived and Im suppost to be up again in five and a half hours for another gruelling day at work. 
Great rewrite, by the way.
I thought so too. I wonder how Pinkie Sense will pick up a death this time. My version:
Pinkie was finishing up a bach of muffins for Derpy, as she was putting them on counter, she suddenly felt tired and weak. Flipping the tray and spilling hot muffins all over the floor."Pinkie what's wrong?" Asked a worried Mrs. Cake. Upon reaching her she noticed Pinkie shivering, like she's been stuck in a meat locker for some time.
Something like that.
Actually, no. There are going to be two chapters before we get to where we left off. It's going to take place in the Port of Grydon, where Dash needs to find away to get out of the port which is on lockdown for military reasons. It's going to help explore the nature of the Griffin Republic (Which is not as democratic as you might think) as well as explore the nature between the ponies and griffins after AJ's death and Celestia determination to enter her troops into the nation.
So be sure to keep an eye out
I loved how it had a 'happy dark' going on near the end. "I stabbed her I stabbed her!" was the theme and I loved it. I was hoping Celestia would beat the manure out of RD, pick up and toss AJ's corpse out of the coffin, jam RD in there and scream: "YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN KILLED INSTEAD!" before sealing the whole thing with magic and burying it. I was so engrossed in the story that I was stopping every paragraph just to imagine how it could have ended from those points. I want RD to smile a creepy smile and say "Looks like I win AJ, and I have everypony believing that the gryphons killed you. It was the perfect crime." Then Luna overhears or something and the whole scene turns bat wild. Too bad, I loved the story anyway. "I killed her, it was me! I finished her off!" Hahaha! Priceless! OH AND THE "Why?" from Apple Bloom, just hilariously put mate, absolute gold! Good show!
You should make an alternate ending where everyybody gangs on on RD for some reason, and slices her eyeballs out with a screwdriver. Everybody has insane bloodlust and then they start eating her while she's writhing on the ground going "OH MY GODDES OH NO!!!!!!!!!!" Then everybody including the princesses, Trixie, and the changelings have an orgy on top of AJ's still-open casket.
I'm picturing RD upper cutting Celestia in the jaw in slow motion
I'll have to admit. The first time i read this on fanfiction.net i was much darker
and i actually read through the whole story when i found out it was changed 
i like this story better, it's not as dark but you get the feeling that it is actually the character thinking or speaking 
great work! I hope to see this story finished and is anxious to find out how it ends ^^
Oh hello? Has Christmas come early? I've been waiting weeks for this!
The blade of the ax bit into Rainbow Dash’s skull with a wet crunch.
WTF! Did I miss something!? 
Well done sir. I couldn't even read the next sentence I had to go check the previous chapter to see where the hell I was lol
A tip of the hat to you. 
That mirror of yours seems to have an uncanny resemblance to a certain diamond in real life (If I remember right it's called The Hope Diamond). Very entertaining, can't wait for more. Almost enough to bring forth those manly tears, but no such things happened (In honest truth I didn't even cry at My Little Dashie, but it made me tear up and left me up all night to think.) How we met was one of my favorite stories, and this is shaping up the be the same way.
/potential spoilers(?)/
Pretty much the main characters of FMA, Edward Elric and Alphonse Elric, try to bring their dead mother back to life via alchemy. They gather the required elements that make up a human body, eg carbon, phosphorus, salt, etc, but when they actually get the to 'reviving the dead' part, Ed ends up giving up his left leg while Alphonse loses his entire body to revive whats essentially half a human corpse with an entirely different soul thats not their mothers. Ed then binds Al's soul to a suit of armour, sacrificing his right arm during the transmutation.
At the end of it all, Ed lost an arm and a leg, and Al lost his entire body all for a dieing corpse, which died shortly after, that didnt even have their mothers soul in it, all because of the #1 law of alchemy known as 'Equivalent Exchange'.
Its a good show.
Not many stories can make me cry... But you have... Congratulations sir...
This story is by far one of the best I've read so far, right up there next to Xenophilia.
I didn't out right burst into tears, but I wish I'd had some tissues handy. Especially for that quote from granny smith :
“No mother should have to bury her child,” muttered Granny Smith as she placed the flower inside, “but it’s unthinkable for a grandmother to bury her grandchild."
And the song from Apple Bloom.
I really like how you didn't jump right into Rainbow's quest and had a lot of very well done, heart rending, build up.
I can't wait for the rest of this story to come out, I already know the ending will be bitter sweet, but I want to read it anyways.
It made me very happy when Dash Talked to Big Mac, it made everything a little happier knowing that he didn't blame her. It was also pretty neat how you managed to put in his characteristic "eeyup" and "nope."
Keep up the amazing writing, and have a thumbs up from me.
Ooh, interesting. I'm wary about this exchange thing, though. If Applejack is to come back whole, then Dash or someone else will have to leave whole. Other than that there's bound to be soul angst or zombification happening somewhere. The whole Gauntlet thing reminds me of Dragon Age and the Andraste's Ashes quest - which can only be a good thing. Keep up the excellent work, and even though I'm (most likely mistakenly) hoping for some sort of happy ending, the dark undertones are really emotional and gripping - nice job
This is absolutely hands down the best story I have read yet. My little dashie was also one of the best, but this is for sure the best story I've read so far. I'm 17 and I've cried only three times in my life, when my brother died, when i read MLD, and now this. Rainbow Dash is the best pony. Please don't stop writing this.
Well, I tried..I really really tried to make it without shedding a tear. I had tears in my eyes but they didn't make it down my face till the goodbyes started. I see this hasn't been updated in some time, which makes me sad to no end. Nothing worse then a story like this that is left unfinished.....I may have to finish it myself and tuck it away so I can have my happy ending and closure. Gotta say, another good round...
ONE complaint.......I can't see AJ killing herself. I just can't. Shes stronger then that. ASking someone to end your misery and doing it yourself are different. There my two cents.
Your not the only one. Some people prefer the old way she died (off a cliff), but I changed it to this one because I feel it would have a more emotional challenge for Rainbow Dash to overcome since Applejack asked her to end her suffering for her. As for the updating, things have been slow because of holidays and the ApplejackxDash Contest, but now I'm working on the next chapter and I'm 1/3 done.
Update: She doesn't kill herself. She asks Rainbow Dash to end her suffering because there is no hope for her and she wanted a quick death then a slow and painful one.
Excellent to know you are still working on it....I don't know, the way i read it, when AJ pulls Rainbow Dashes head to her with the dagger in her mouth, just seems like like she more did it herself. I agree though that Dash ending her suffering would give Dash more emotional challenges to over come. I just pray and hope, in the end, they can be together, I may just die from heart break otherwise.
ok i have made this account with the sole purpose of commenting on the story. i have read many different works on the site but you sir have my utmost attention with this one, every time i think of it my heart aches for her and i feel a knot in my stomach, i have read many novels, short stories and even the occasional non - fiction and they all pale in comparison to these four short (hopefully temporarily) incomplete chapters.So please for the sake of my knotted up stomach finish soon!
Silva saluted. “Commander Blackwing, I was investigating two griffins who were acting suspicious. I followed them to this alley when they suddenly attacked me. This pony, Rainbow Dash, assisted me when I was in need of help.”
Is it intentional that Silva uses Dash's actual name, and not her fake one? :x
Reset Password
Resend Verification Email
1,927 ( 6,999 )
More
Less
Post Comment
Refresh
.
Image: http://mimg.ugo.com/201105/5/4/3/188345/cuts/ege_288x288.jpg
and 
are the most appropriate things here. That was a heartrending depiction... I cannot wait to see where you go with this from here on out.
Cancel
Send