"We pledge ourselves to Equestria,
To be the first that bleed when the nation suffers,
To be the first to fall in its defence,
To be the avengers when it is wronged.
We are Celestia's eyes in the dark,
We are Celestia's hooves beyond her reach,
We are Celestia's will in lawless land,
Until we cannot do more."
~ Dawn Guard Oath
It has been 200 years since the climatic battle between the sisters, and Princess Celestia is still reeling emotionally from the war that consumed Equestria, leaving her distant and paranoid. To make sure that the tragedy would never repeat itself, she had formed the Dawn Guard soon after the battle to find the wicked wherever they might be found, and end all threats to the land and it's Princess.
Celerity was born into this world, and wants nothing less but to live up to the example her grandfather, a legendary leader of the elite group, set for her. As she struggles for her goal, it becomes apparent that others have designs for her too, and she will have to learn the cost of defying them.
This is a bit of a departure for me, but I hope you guys give it a fair shake. If you see mistakes, kick me and let me know, and always, try and enjoy my ramblings.
This chapter was bit of an exposition dump, rule setter, and setting builder. I hope that doesn't chase you away.
Thanks for your time!
Not the CALL of duty?
Go on...
1786346
Ick! No. Never
Chapter Two has arrived; Character development, ho!
I'll have to admit, the introduction nearly scared me off; dull realism certainly isn't something that I'm used to observing in a world of technicolor ponies and magic. However, I'm glad I stayed along for the ride, the clarification of the plot and main characters was all I needed to see to be convinced that this story to work. I also had some impressions based on the cover and initial description that this may be a stereotypical war fic. It's sad that some people really only care for the totally upbeat fics that defuse reality, but here's to hoping this story catches! I'd say it's duly able.
As for grammar / spelling, I've been seeing some repeat errors such as mildly excessive commas, the continued use of "must of been" as opposed to "must have been," and a few double negatives. Overall, it's easy to skim over these mistakes, just wanted to give a heads-up.
Random correction of the day:
Have can be eliminated to fit the style of language you're using. Copper would be saying "have have" otherwise.
I'm back! Woo.
Thanks for yout time guys