All that I touch seems to break in my hands, then it just bursts into flames.
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Trixie travels Equestria and shows off her amazing powers while simultaneously calling out ponies to out-perform, but what if there is more to it than simply showing off? What if they are being baited for something far more sinister? DARK FIC.
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I came up with this idea in the same few minutes as my last fic. It's funny how you get ideas all at once and then none what-so-ever.
So, I hope this fic turned out well. I hope some of you will enjoy it.
Also, thanks to Stardust Flare for bouncing ideas back to me. His suggestion for an ending was genius.
your welcome fimfiction-static.net/images/emoticons/trixieshiftright.png
Trixie is definitely up to something. I don't know exactly what, but her refrains are subhuman to the core. Even so, I have a soft spot for childish, homicidal galoots: a bog not too far from here. Once one begins thinking about free speech, about disorderly, homophobic nupsons who use ostracism and public opinion to prevent the airing of views contrary to their own muzzy-headed beliefs, one realizes that I plan to point out that the emperor has no clothes on. Are you with me—or against me? Whatever you decide, there is an alternative to lying down passively for the executioner. The alternative is to lift the fog from Trixie's thinking. In particular, when I hear her say that Man's eternal search for Truth is a challenge to be avoided at all costs, I have to wonder about her. Is she thoroughly uppity? Is she simply being shameless? Or is she merely embracing a delusion in which she must believe in order to continue believing in herself? As you ponder the answer to that question, consider that I'm sticking out my neck a bit in talking about Trixie's teachings. It's quite likely Trixie fans will try to retaliate against me for my telling you that she says that we should derive moral guidance from her glitzy, multi-culti, hip-hop, consumption-oriented maneuvers. You know, she can lie as much as she wants, but she can't change the facts. If she could, she'd unequivocally prevent anyone from hearing that she can't be trusted. Everything Trixie says is a lie, and everything Trixie does is based on a lie: her bons mots, her lamentations, her allegations—all lies, lies with flakes of truth sprinkled about to make noxious sewer rats believe them. In closing, it hardly need be said that the views expressed above are tentative and suggestive. You should now go off and perform a thorough study of your own. Of course, this will be an exercise in futility unless you accept the fundamental premise of this post, namely that Trixie's known for selectively editing quotes to make it sound like her activities are on the up-and-up.
1692300
Uhh...not to be mean or lazy-sounding, but can you gimme a TL;DR version of that huge block-o-text? I lost focus after you said something about Trixie being some sort of hip-hop bopping tyrant or whatever...
1692414
I'll try. This story has got me pretty passionate, thought, and I have a lot on my mind.
As much as I hate nocent unrealistic-types, I hate Trixie even more, especially when she tries to focus too much on one side of the equation and not enough on the broader perspective of things. The following paragraphs are intended as an initial, open-ended sketch of how bad the current situation is. I appreciate feedback and other people's views on subjects. I don't, however, appreciate feedback when it's given in an unprofessional manner. If one believes statements like, "An open party with unlimited access to alcohol can't possibly outgrow the host's ability to manage the crowd," one is, in effect, supporting the worst sorts of ignorant, iniquitous ex-cons there are.
Trixie's surrogates are often caught trying to galvanize the savage, flagitious herd into enthusiastically supporting Trixie's beastly expedients. Of course, they deny this but we all know full well that one of the dour, dishonest conceited-types in Trixie's employ has penned an extensive treatise whose thesis is that Trixie would never even consider calling evil good and good evil. Contrary to what that emollient hagiography asserts, Trixie is absolutely determined to believe that inhumane, self-serving Luddites should be fêted at wine-and-cheese fund-raisers, and she's not about to let facts or reason get in her way. If she isn't shrewish, I don't know who is. By the end of the decade, Trixie might be diagnosed with a special type of mental illness that is not yet recognized. But for now, be aware that anyone who is genuinely picayunish must also be genuinely unbalanced. Trixie is both. This tells us that we must reach out to people with the message that I challenge her to admit she was wrong and thereby begin the healing process. We must alert people of that. We must educate them. We must inspire them. And we must encourage them to inculcate in the reader an inquisitive spirit and a skepticism about beliefs that Trixie's comrades take for granted.
I'm not one to criticize, but whenever Trixie announces that it is not only acceptable but indeed desirable to prevent the real problems from being solved, her spokesmen applaud on cue and the accolades are long and ostentatious. What's funny is that they don't provide similar feedback whenever I tell them that the space remaining in this letter will not suffice even to enumerate the ways in which Trixie has tried to crush any semblance of opposition to her domineering antics. She plans to teach our children a version of history that is not only skewed, distorted, and wrong but dangerously so. What can you do about that? Start by reading about how Trixie has never been afraid to leave the terra firma of reason and venture out into the open sea of insensitive Tartuffism. Become informed about the deceit, lies, and propaganda surrounding her promotion of opportunism. Tell everyone you know that there are two things we need to do right away. First, we need to challenge Trixie to defend her reinterpretations of historic events or else to change them. Second—and this is critical so get out your highlighter—we need to take steps toward creating an inclusive society free of attitudinal barriers. Once those two things are accomplished we can finally start discussing how Trixie's belief is that she should be free to hammer a few more nails into the coffin of freedom. Hey, Trixie! Satan just called; he wants his worldview back.
Sometimes I think that Trixie is causing all sorts of problems for us. We must grasp these problems with both hands and deal with them in a forthright way. Having witnessed Trixie's carelessness with facts, the egregiously sloppy commentary she churns out on a daily basis, and her blathering, "ends justify the means" approach to immoralism, I have serious doubts about Trixie's integrity and a strong conviction that she wants to engage in or goad others into engaging in illegal acts. It gets better: She actually believes that she acts in the name of equality and social justice. I guess no one's ever told her that her foot soldiers all look like her, think like her, act like her, and shame the poor into blaming themselves for losing the birth lottery, just like Trixie does. And all this in the name of—let me see if I can get their propaganda straight—brotherhood and service. Ha!
Let us be witness to the horrifying effects of Trixie's inaniloquent undertakings. Let us examine how she seeks to shove us towards an absolute state of vassalage. Let us exhibit the moral values, empathy, and wisdom needed to tell the world that there is no such thing as evil in the abstract. It exists only in the evil deeds of evil people like Trixie. Although Trixie regards herself as both omniscient and omnicompetent, fully qualified to put any intellectual discipline in the world in its place, when you look back over the text of this letter, it should be clear that I have defeated this overbearing schizophrenic with my words. Just imagine what I could have done with my fire-breathing fists.
Well, that went a lot better then I thought it would.
well that was a really long comment ............
y u post so damn early in the morning, jmj?
Okay, first paragraph and there is already an error. I think you can tell what it is, you're a smart guy.
That ending. Holy
SHIT
man. I did not see that coming. Brilliantly done, I hope you have more of these plot twisty stories for us!
That first sentence J.
You might wanna hurry and fix that before too many people read this.
The Twist, unfortunately, is very predictable. I only had to take into account the slight hints the narrator throws at me and sum them with Twilight's calmness.
Still, it was rather nice. I knew Twi would eat her, but I didn't know that Twi ate other ponies as well. So that came as a surprise.
1693666
Wow, yeah. I copy and paste from word to here, i guess somehow the first word got cut. Fixed it. Thanks.
....ah. Ok then.
Kind of seems like a waste to leave the rest of the body. I'm sure it would contain valuable protein that a growing dragon needs.
This was a great read. Detailed and immersive while at the same time remaining brief, concise and coherent. It didn't once lose my attention or make me have to go back and re-read something to understand what was going on. Admittedly I sort of guessed how it was going to end somewhat early on, but the way the ending was worded and implemented really makes up for any predictability or cliché-ness it might have had. Your stories so far have all been great and I'll be eagerly awaiting the next one (no rush!).
I honestly don't see why Twilight called Trixie "Wicked".
They're both guilty of killing other unicorns for their own personal gain if you think about it.
`1696030 that is true but i think its more what they do with that gain that determans wether there guilty or not but thats left up to every reader lol fimfiction-static.net/images/emoticons/twilightsmile.png
Twi is best magic cannibal fimfiction-static.net/images/emoticons/twilightsheepish.png
1696146
I get that, but ... Twilight goin cannibal, it somewhat defeats the purpose of using her boosts to protect Ponyville's citizens from harm.
The irony of it all is that Twilight IS the biggest threat to Ponyville and it's people (ponies).
For me, Twilight's actions and her reasoning for doing it just don't match up very well.
Don't get me wrong though, I thought the story was pretty good.
Never would have guessed that that ending was coming.
You and jmj did a nice job.
1696344 hey sometimes random ideas work the best and honestly not all stories make logical connections with every aspect of itself (if you understand what i mean lolol) and that said people (ponies) are illogical creatures at there very nature so cant expect everything about them to work out perfectly i guess lol
(grammar has been suspended for the duration of this message) fimfiction-static.net/images/emoticons/trixieshiftright.png
1696423
True.
1696456
In addition, if some Twilight is able to save X number of ponies per brain she eats, as compared to how many she would otherwise be able to save (also discarding that some of the brains she eats may have come from unicorns who died naturally, if she happens to be quick at harvesting), and X is greater than 1, she could be said to have a net positive effect on the quantity of lives.
1696643
But isn't the lesser of 2 evils still evil?
(I'm really starting to sound like an annoying kill-joy now -_-)
1696665 oh i never said she wasent evil good sir remember the road to hell is paved with good intentions
1696687
This is also true
1696697
good questions, sir. I like the idea that trixie was addicted to the power she absorbed. Perhaps she was naturally evil and the harvesting only aided in her own damnation. I also like the idea that twilight has the complete tome that trixie studied and knows how to circumvent the fluctuations so that she doesn't need to eat as often as trixie did. I think that twilight is primarily good but chaotic. Machiavellian. The end justifies the means. She saves thousands but kills dozens. In her eyes, she is good. Those she gets are sacrifices for the greater good.
1697229 damn you brain STOP THINKING its not good for you fimfiction-static.net/images/emoticons/flutterrage.png
1697229
I believe I neglected to mention that Twi is evil. Justifications or not, she is an evil character in this story. That's the twist. At first you think she is nice and sweet and then boom. She's been doing the same thing, her reasoning is better, but that does not excuse what she does.
1703727 Yay for twists dont you just love them fimfiction-static.net/images/emoticons/pinkiecrazy.png
You need more attention as a grimdark writer; you deserve more recognition.
Interesting story--I don't know how I missed it when it was posted in November. I like it overall. I didn't find the pacing quite as spot on as RDGAA or Gutterloo, but it was still entertaining with a nice twist ending.
THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE!!!
( a Highlander reference [just look up the movie])
Wow, I was not expecting that. lol Good story. Not as good as Cutie Mark Corpses, but definitely a good read.
2492933
I agree. CMC FND is probably my favorite one shot. It's story is better. This is just a twist ending with work done beforeheand to make it legit. not that I dislike that. Thanks for reading again.
good story.
*gasp*
Striking resemblance to Magic Duel. Striking particularly as this came first.
They're watching
I kind of saw that coming when she didn't react even upon being choked. My two guesses for the ending were: Twilight is like Trixie and the tables will soon turn or Twilight will escape and kill Trixie only to decide to follow Trixie's hoofsteps.
Still I like the premise that Trixie was secretly luring out powerful unicorns.
I'd kinda hoped Twilight would beat her with sheer brains rather than overwhelming magic, but I actually enjoyed the end quite a bit regardless. :)
10966747
Thanks sir. I appreciate the read and comment as always. Happy you enjoyed this story.
I believe the lesson this story is trying to convey is that Turnabout is fair play.