That's a BADASS coverart.

Also the story is coming along well.

I like where this is going.

WANT

WANTWANTWANT. Gimmie MOAR

Cheers

~iraqlobstah

I have not even clicked on the chapter link yet, and I'm loving stuff about this. The picture, the summary, it's just too AWSOME!!!

Trying not to set my sights too high just yet. But I've got a feeling you may just meet, maybe even surpass, my expectations.

Here's to hoping!

SHIT JUST GOT REAL

I used this image for a comment! Neat!

I can tell that this is going to be epic

I look forward to the next chapter.

An interesting story, but you really, REALLY need to work on your comma usage. There were FAR too many run-on sentences. That was the only thing that jumped out at me.

>>117173117173 And with that first chapter finished, you sir have officially blown my mind!

Welp. I'll say this. While the grammar isn't perfect, the setup is good.

I'd suggest getting a very good pre-reader before continuing.

Was very short yet you have my attention. Like Alzeron said a few sentences seemed to go on too long. Other than that looking forward to seeing where this leads off to.

Not going to lie here, but when Angel quoted Hannibal, I luled. I'm curious to see where this is going.

hmm very interesting story and the mention of humans and how well written this is is even more awesum keep up the great work

That part when Rainbow tells Pinkie that she dropped her toothbrush in the toilet was from an episode of Spongebob.

I'm loving this story.

pure liquid sugar

That would be caramel. It's what you get when you melt sugar of any kind.

Wow! Gonna be epic!

Thanks for reading and commenting guys. I really appreciate it. Keep in mind this is my first fan fiction ever. I DO NOT expect it to be great despite any attempts on my part. I made this chapter much cheerier then the last out of necessity but also to try my hand at a slightly different writting style. Also this chapter was slightly focused on Pinkie Pie and we ALL know anything involving her will be either funny or strange. (Cupcakes does NOT count.) Finally just so future readers know, I plan on taking my time with writting this. I don't write well under pressure and rushing along will deminish the quality so please be patient. CHEERS

Excellent

Dat coverart

SO BADASS

well expect for the fact that the chapter was kinda short it was awesome cant wait to see the up coming return of the humans WUAHAHAHAHA keep up the great work

You guys don't know this but I've had pneumonia for the past 2 weeks. I'm only now getting better (still hacking up my lungs though) and I'm working on the next chapter when I feel up to it. Sorry, I tried to work on it sooner but anything I wrote came out terrable. I don't like to keep any of you guys waiting especially since I don't like waiting ether yet I also don't like to be rushed so it's kind of stressful situation for me so please please please wait a little longer.

you really should have separated up the walls of dialogue more like whenever princess Celestia stopped and you described something exasperated the wall of dialogue, other than that the story seems pretty good so far keep up the great work   

SKYRIM FTW

Nerd-Gasm at the Dragonlance reference!!

>>205401205401 At least somebody noticed that.

THe only complaint i have is the wall of text, you should break that up, it can be difficult to follow for some readers, but overall pretty good.

Try to work on the giant walls of text you got going on and see if you can put them into different paragraphs with each new or different idea/description. The part where you're describing what each of the mane6 are looking at in the room especially could use some breaking up since it's a real strain on the eyes for most people I'm sure. (Myself included.)

Another great chapter otherwise. Now lock your armor Spartan! We're about to go feet first into hell! (Halo reference? No? Ok...)

>>208024208024 I think I'm noticing a trend here. I'll try to work on that in the futer. Also another thing...Orbital Drop Shock Troopers. I am aware of the refrence.

YEY AN UPDATE!

ths story just keeps getting better

cant wait to see the next chapter

I'm now imagining OUR human race (No magic or that stuff) suddenly popping up out of nowhere and fighting off the other humans/

wat

i though he would say ' IT WAS PAIN' no death... oh well.

Our time has come.

For one thousand years, we prepared, we grew stronger.

While you rested in your cradle of power.

Believing your people safe and protected.

You were trusted to lead the three races, but you where deceived.

As our powers of darkness have blinded you.

You assumed no force could challenge you.

And now.

Finally...

Image: 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

...We. Have. Returned.

FATALITY!

FLAWLESS VICTORY!

Awww yeah shit's getting real!  Can't wait for the next chapter

And it would seem I'm first.

So did celestias parents kill all of the bipedal races?

i almost forgot about this story.....................and now its updated it hath became 20% cooler!

I THIS STORY!

p.s. I CLAIM THE TITLE OF: "THIRD!"

>>498456498456 That will be explained a bit more later but I plan on leaving the full story of what happened more or less vague.

>>498742498742 damn you!!!, Jk aslong as this celestia dies, i will be a happy man

Sounds like everything pony like is going back to nature. Animals are skittish, clouds and rainbows are going back water vapor and light reflections. Pest animals are showing up in a utopia. Yep, sounds like humans to me.

Freaking Elements of Harmony.

When skill and ability aren't enough, god-mode it.

i call hacks, no way they could have done that

Noooooooo! WHY! WHHHHY!

*sighs*

Why did the humanzzz have to loose.

It aint over yet people.

Honestly... I want the humans to win...

i knew the ponies would win....and do you know why?

Image:  http://images1.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20111201160912/callofduty/images/8/87/My-little-pony-friendship-is-magic-brony-case-closed.jpg

but knowing how kickass the main villain is and the fact that he has a missive freaking golem i think i know how he will react....

Image:  http://img.ponibooru.org/_images/dd17138cd51f2dd99ac660e3ebb401af/41543%20-%20Act_of_War%20Friendship%20anti-bronies%20hate%20reaction_image.jpg

WHY WONT YOU DIE PONIES!!!!

I call upon the highest of bullshit if he is defeated and this is the end of the war.

First the mane 6 win because of Deus ex Harmonia.

Then, Illitheous gets wasted when he was winning for the same reason.

If, Illitheous dies then really? That would simply be one of the most horrible ending in the 'ENTIRE UNIVERSE' besides ME3, man that sucked.

I´m calling it, he gets turned to stone, every pony sighs in relief, and 2 seconds later the stone prison explodes, and the shrapnel kills at least one of the Mane 6 (or injures at least)

(By The Way) Great story .

FOOLS! VENGEANCE NEVER DIES!

I can't be the only one feeling sorry for Illitheous am I? I know he is a lich, but still I find him more enjoyable than Celestia as a character.

And as for the Deus Ex Machina stuff from chapter 10 I have this to say to the author “For that latest attempt on this story, you have set in stone a very slow death for yourself.”

The elements of harmony vs a revenge obsesses lich?

obviously the mane 6 are forgetting rule 13

Image:  http://www.motivationals.org/demotivational-posters/demotivational-poster-15931.jpg

epic chapter is epic

Ok readers I've got good news and bad news. The good news is the new chapter is up and I have about two chapters worth of un-edited material in the works. The bad news is that my proof reader is on vacation for the week and wont be available to make the chapters presentable. So you'll all have to wait a minimum of 5 days to a max of 10 days before any updates after this. Sorry.

Still, any comments, thumb ups, and such are appreciated.

Is this middle earth or a combination of fantasies? I CAN"T TELL!

>>627185627185 Think about my friend. Think about it long and hard and the answer will come to you.

>>627185627185

I get the feeling that this is playing a big part in the story.

Image: http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/b/b7/Unico_Anello.png

As others have said, the grammar could use some work. However, the descriptions are genuinely a bit creepy at times, and you've done a good job of setting the mood, despite this chapter's brevity.

Once I've read the story as a whole, I'll try and give what feedback I can. If I weren't so busy, I would volunteer to be your editor, as I can see some real potential here.

Image: http://fim.413chan.net/oatmeal/src/130050806390-Pinkie_go_on.jpg

>Ben Baggins

HOLY FUCK A HOBBIT

YES

Hope they die, in this story, no hard feelings.

animals everywhere are going crazy with a capital 2+2=FISH!

Image: http://i1.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/000/158/617/tumblr_louw4gpxLg1qj41h3o1_400.png

Image: http://i1.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/000/155/668/tumblr_lok1aaKkUa1qj41h3o1_500.jpg

I truly hope the Humans win, I feel thier pain, It was the Alicorns fault through, not the Equestrians (ponies), it was all their fault. The humans just want there land back

THERE CAN ONLY BE O-*zzzzap*

No wait, that doesn't work.

How about.

OFF WITH HIS HE- *bzzzzt*

>>742477742477 ditto, humans ftw

human emporer got pwned

but thunder guys dead now right? so WOOT victory by default for Illitheous :P

>>746660746660 Thank you so much for the comments! I can never get enough feed back (constructive or intertaining).

YOU HERE THAT READERS?! COMMENT!!!

Somehow magically 6 ponies with no combat experience at all managed to defeat all their opponents I can understand not being able to kill Fluttershy and maybe Pinkie but the rest just no. Yeah, I'm done here, it was good while it lasted. :L

>>746924746924 Well I'm sorry to hear that. Though I wouldn't say the ponies had NO combat experiance, Nightmare moon still counts for something and they were all training extensivly for about a month due to Luna and Celestia's warning. Also the elements of harmony have done similer plot device agiants Discord. That was my resoning behind it.I will admit that was not my finest moment but that chapter was filled with writers block and I guarantee you wont be seeing any more of that from here on out if you give my work a 2nd chance you wont be dissapointed...please.

>>746741746741  would have commented faster but my exams only finished recently and i didnt have time to read

but now i have returned....AND I SHALL READ ALL THE FANFICS

KILL EM KILL EM ALL

So Luna, you really think Human's are bad. They do what is necissary, not what is right or wrong.

>>792070792070 Her opinion has changed considerably as of the end of this chapter. Thank you for commening.

a suitibly epic tale for the leader of the humans

nice touch with the taking on the name of his dead brother

>>792241792241 I know right? What a twist!

humanity will rise again take back what is ours

We will rise defeat the wretched alicorns and peace as our reward

Awww man, humanities emperor just got owned... that sucks. DAM YOU OVER-GLORIFIED MULE!

Never saw that one coming! A fantastic plot twist I must say... Now, all that stands against humanities birth right, is Celestia! And the mane six... dam those pest!

>>793875793875 I love that you enjoyed the plot twist. That was my pride and joy when I came up with a rough outline of what would happen in the story. So many comments make me happy Now I only need more thumb ups so it gets featured and today will be just perfect.

the Hannibal quote remedied me of this

Image: http://i.usatoday.net/communitymanager/_photos/drive-on/2010/06/11/vansidex-large.jpg

loving this chatper

Illitheous  is kicking ass and taking names...and hostages too

This world is ours now and forever

yeah... the turnarounds are a very poorly written dues ex machina that is just plainly unsatsifying even for the ones who wanted the ponies to when to be honest :/

>>857455857455 Writers block is bi*yay*.

>>746630746630 KILL ALL THE PONIES!!!!!!

nah, i just want the humans to win without the sappy ' they all lived happily in peace together with the ponies' ending

So what happend to the mother?

>>859936859936 She died due to a deal she made to have the chaotic foreign races moved elsewhere out of Equestria at the cost of her strength. She promptly died of a lack of will to live after. Celestia mentions this from her point of veiw briefly in chapter "One Princess's Perspective is Another Man's Lies". It wasn't overly important to the story so I kind of went over that part in brief. I know in my head what the details were but it would have destracted from the main focus of the story too much.

Lookin good so far.

le more

Alright, Alrght! I got chills at the end of the chapter. I'll delve deeper into the mystery despite my misgivings about humans as the villains. Oh but we make such goooood villains do we not?

Time is 7:10 PM.

>>10586041058604 Just a warning that the chap Bring Down the Sky will be rewritten because it really could have been better I'm told. So mabey just skim that one or something. Im also starting to reworke with most of the other chapters to a much lesser degree.

Score another one for god ol Human ingenuity and force. Humanity is on top, while the ponies are between a piece of lettuce and tomato!

Damnit more then one human. I'm out.

AW, I was hoping that they would be trapped there forever, so they can't possibly interfere with Humanity.

>>14630411463041 No such luck.

I laughed so hard  when that door quoted, 'Horse please, I'm a door.'

Great job!

update yay i love this story

Wow just got done reading this and i have to say, bravo sir this is quite good.

There are one or two elements that seem cliche at first glance but i think overall, they lend a very 'television' feel to the whole thing.

I think you had the right idea with the comic, as good as this reads i think it would be far better as a comic or animation. Not that you have the ability to do that, but take it as a complement i find your story good enough for a more than one medium.