• Member Since 28th Jul, 2012
  • offline last seen 22 hours ago

GeodesicDragon


I am a Scotsman who writes stories, not all of which are of the self-insert variety. Books are available again; check my userpage for details.

T
Source

Everyone knows the story of how Geo came to be in Equestria, how he came to meet Twilight Sparkle and the Mane Six, and how he fell in love only for Fate to royally screw him over and send him back to his own world.

But what if he had met somepony else instead? Namely Cheerilee, the stalwart teacher of Ponyville's young. Through their time together, they both realise that they can learn so much from each other — including how to love.

But when jealousy rears its ugly head, the consequences can be very dire indeed...

AUTHOR'S NOTES

Part of the Alternate Geoverse.

It is simply an idea that I've had for a while and wanted to write. The story starts after Geo is shot and ends up in the forest clearing. It is written in first person from Geo's POV.

Characters will be tagged as they appear.

Chapters (11)
Comments ( 97 )

Have you ever thought that we only learn because were human, what if we didn't learn... then we wouldn't be human or have to learn at all, weird?
29.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lkhzohB9a31qjtvjso1_500.gif

1650767 Homostuck FTW

Seriously, people. If you're gonna downvote, at least have the decency to tell me why. :facehoof:

1650767

That is weird. :rainbowhuh:

1651310

That means nothing to me. :twilightsheepish:

Hmmm interesting I've read the Too X is human and this alternative change to show what would have happened if geo met cherilee instead of twilight is pretty nice I like it, But I would always prefer geo and twilight :twilightsmile:

1651429 It seems a wee bit rushed to me is all.

Can't wait to see how this goes though. UP VOTE!

b-but... geo x twilight is my otp...:pinkiesad2:

btw cant wait for more

i asked for a sequel...

good enough

1656326

Uh-oh! Someone didn't read the description! :twilightsmile:

This story is NOT part of the To X Is Human series. It is simply an idea that I've had for a while and wanted to write.

1656416 i did read the description

1656603

... :facehoof:

I completely misread your comment. Sorry about that! :derpytongue2:

Twi is damn near my favorite pony, but shit, Cheerilee is pretty friggin awesome too. Let's see how this goes.:twilightsmile:

1661302
Indeed, Just like i had to adjust to a new life.
A Life of death.

I can't wait for the next chapter this story is gonna be amazing :pinkiehappy:

Finally got around to reading it.

Sorry I procrastinate so much.

Hmmm, seems to be coming along. Keep it up good sir!

Tim

Everything before

"It would certainly seem that way." I replied. "I assume you are the pony who treated me?"

is present tense.:moustache:

"What about ME?!":twilightangry2:

Yeah, she barely got mentioned even in her first appearance so far. No sense of connection here?

1735608

Never mind the fact the Prologue was focusing on another part of my storyline, and the fact that this entire story will be based on Twilight's adventures in Season Three.

Oh! I really liked this! I'll look forward to the next chapter! :twilightsmile:

Haha good sir this story is excellent:ajsmug:


But... I want Cheerilee for myself!

Oh well.

*Heads off to an alternate Equestria where Cheerilee is single now*

Yay!

Cheerilee!^_^

I can't wait to see what happons next. :rainbowdetermined2:

Ok, I've given this and the canon Geoverse a shot and I noticed one consistant theme that just destroys it for me.

Geo is constantly ok with everything the moment somepony says 'oh thats normal here' and always gives them a smile.

No way would anyone sane person being told 'healing from a gunshot wound near the spine in two days is a long time' going to let the matter drop like that. If it was me it would require at least 20 minutes to an hour of explaining how the hell that's even possible before I'd let the matter drop.

Seriously, why the hell does he have complete trust in everyone instantly? Going by his backstory he shouldn't be this quick to trust or quick to smile.

In addition, a recurring theme in these stories is the generally weak decriptions and lean content. Overally the whole 'Geoverse' has been a disappointment.

2535936

No way would anyone sane person being told 'healing from a gunshot wound near the spine in two days is a long time' going to let the matter drop like that. If it was me it would require at least 20 minutes to an hour of explaining how the hell that's even possible before I'd let the matter drop.

I'm not you. 'nuff said. You'd think that the fact Geo is in a different world entirely there would be some massive differences. Better to just shut up and go with it, I say.

Seriously, why the hell does he have complete trust in everyone instantly? Going by his backstory he shouldn't be this quick to trust or quick to smile.

Geo's backstory was covered in Chapter Five of To Friend Is Human. Let me go over it really quick.

* He was bullied at school.
* He started lashing out at people who insulted him.
* He was sent to a therapist, where he learned to 1) control his anger and 2) make friends.
* He made a few friends, but they moved away after a while.
* He found that he was slipping back into his old ways, so took the warehouse job to keep himself occupied.
* He had been through a bad shift at work the night he was shot and was angry, thus causing him to shout at Derek when he nearly ran him over.

I'm guessing you didn't see the whole 'therapy' part? Because that probably explains why Geo is quick to trust people (or ponies in this case).

In addition, a recurring theme in these stories is the generally weak decriptions and lean content. Overally the whole 'Geoverse' has been a disappointment.

I'm sorry you feel that way but yours is but another drop of disappointment in an ocean of praise.

2537214

You'd think that the fact Geo is in a different world entirely there would be some massive differences. Better to just shut up and go with it, I say.

All the more reason to question everything actually. Humanity didn't become the dominant species on Earth by accepting everything at face value, we question everything we see and seek ever more detailed answers.

I'm guessing you didn't see the whole 'therapy' part? Because that probably explains why Geo is quick to trust people (or ponies in this case).

No it doesn't, not at all. Far more likely that someone would act open and trusting on the outside but keep everyone at arms length until they're sure they aren't going to stab them in the back.

In fact I could only believe the genuine quick trusting if the character had prior knowlege of the ponies. Which you where quick to show he didn't in the original story

Seriously, people. If you're gonna downvote, at least have the decency to tell me why.

I'm sorry you feel that way but yours is but another drop of disappointment in an ocean of praise.

It always amuses me when people ask 'why do you down vote' or for criticism then when someone actually takes the time to tell them what they're doing wrong they throw up the less-then-ten-word-praise-posts as a defence mechanism. Kid, if you want to write a good story you should consider those short posts to be the enemy and welcome any and all critique you can get, positive or negative.

Someone taking the time to tell you what you are doing wrong is something to celebrate in the fic writing community. If you receive a hundred comments and only one of them is a critique then you disregard the 99 other comments.

If you are satisfied with your current quality (which I grade at 4 out of 10) then you simply wont become any better, you lack the drive to improve. In contrast I am never satisfied, I know I've stuffed something up no matter how many times I double check my work, even with an editor looking for grammer and spelling errors that I missed.

2539906

I'm guessing you didn't see the whole 'therapy' part? Because that probably explains why Geo is quick to trust people (or ponies in this case).

No it doesn't, not at all. Far more likely that someone would act open and trusting on the outside but keep everyone at arms length until they're sure they aren't going to stab them in the back.

How do you know that for sure? In case you haven't noticed, this is a self-insert story. Therefore the character of Geo is based around me and my own experiences. Geo's backstory is pretty much the same as mine. I did undergo therapy to sort my anger issues, and I did learn to trust people. I am wary of new people, but if they're nice enough I will grow to trust them. Yes, I know that even the worst people can act nice, but I know how to handle myself.

It always amuses me when people ask 'why do you down vote' or for criticism then when someone actually takes the time to tell them what they're doing wrong they throw up the less-then-ten-word-praise-posts as a defence mechanism.

Who's being defensive? I'm simply saying that I respect your opinion, but the vast majority of comments are from people who like the story, hence the 'drop in the ocean' paraphrase.

Kid, if you want to write a good story you should consider those short posts to be the enemy and welcome any and all critique you can get, positive or negative.

'Kid'. Wow, that's real original. :facehoof:

Anyway, when have I ever said that I don't appreciate the comments I get? Because I do. It's not my fault the majority of them are positive.

Someone taking the time to tell you what you are doing wrong is something to celebrate in the fic writing community. If you receive a hundred comments and only one of them is a critique then you disregard the 99 other comments.

Again: I appreciate every comment I get. And I do my best to take all the advice I get to heart.

If you are satisfied with your current quality (which I grade at 4 out of 10) then you simply wont become any better, you lack the drive to improve. In contrast I am never satisfied, I know I've stuffed something up no matter how many times I double check my work, even with an editor looking for grammer and spelling errors that I missed.

I'd like to know what you are basing these assumptions on, because that's all they are — assumptions.

You assume that I don't give a shit about my work, you assume that I don't care about the comments I get and you assume that I don't care about improving my stories.

You assume wrong, but I've already said this.

Right, that's these points answered so I guess the ball is in your court now.

2542717

How do you know that for sure? In case you haven't noticed, this is a self-insert story. Therefore the character of Geo is based around me and my own experiences. Geo's backstory is pretty much the same as mine. I did undergo therapy to sort my anger issues, and I did learn to trust people. I am wary of new people, but if they're nice enough I will grow to trust them. Yes, I know that even the worst people can act nice, but I know how to handle myself.

This was justifiable in the original as you skipped several months where Twilight and your character had time to bond. In the case of this story that period never occured and he blindly accepts the word of a stranger and a doctor of unknown credability as absolute truth. If he had prior knowlege of the pony world this would be justified, as I've said before.

Who's being defensive? I'm simply saying that I respect your opinion, but the vast majority of comments are from people who like the story, hence the 'drop in the ocean' paraphrase.

You are trying to make a stone fortress out of short-post-praise when such a defence only amounts to a sand castle.

This isn't about opinion, if it was I wouldn't have read the entirety of 'To Friend is Human' and the first two chapters of this before commenting. If it was about opinion I wouldn't have commented at all and simply navigated away. If I know I won't like a story from the get go I won't waste my time.

There is nothing wrong with HiE Romance, and in fact TFiH did a fairly good job of it overall, as far as plot and direction at least. But as for the writing itself? TFiH maxed out at around 6/10 on quality and then only near the end. It suffered from very little description and was rushed at points and the fight near the end was disjointed and difficult to keep track of the action.

This story, considering what you managed to put out in TFiH, it seems like you simply aren't trying. If you consider this a 'side project' or 'just for fun' then I have to say, unacceptable. You claim to care about your writing, that all my 'assumptions' are wrong, and yet right here there is a story not receiving due care and diligence.

2546061

I'm not going to waste any more time arguing with you, as any point you make I counter, which in turn gives you more of my points to counter. It's a vicious cycle, so let's just agree to disagree and leave it at that.

But if you want to continue then by all means, be my guest. I'm just going to be the bigger man here and walk away.

No joke, I just favorited this today.
And today you updated. Great timing on my part!

dun dun duuuun....:pinkiegasp:

Comment posted by Skyler Walker deleted May 14th, 2013
Comment posted by DAT GUY deleted May 14th, 2013

Dat cliffhanger :pinkiecrazy:
I can't wait to see where this is going :yay:

Nice to see Time Turner used for something other than the tired walking Dr. Who reference. When you're doing an off the beaten-track story like this, best to stay as far off common-meme railroad tracks as possible. :pinkiehappy:

Hmmm...the chapter was a bit too short for me to take time turner as a serious threat

I opened the classroom door just as the bell rang to signal the end of the and the start of the holidays,

I think you're missing some words there... :twilightoops:

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