• Member Since 18th Jul, 2012
  • offline last seen Jul 2nd, 2013

apple short


I'm me.

Comments ( 46 )

This is seriously the best thing I've read all day.

You cannot comprehend how much I await the next chapter.

1651629 By appleshort's standards, it's FAR from the worst I've seen. A few formatting errors and a lot of purple prose of course...

Edit: Okay... That was fucked up.

1651658 Yeah, Appleshort got better.

1651269 Thanks :twilightsmile: that made my day. :yay:

1651282 Hopefully I will be able to have it up and posted by the end of the week. :pinkiehappy:

1651643 Thanks :twilightblush: I'm glad you like it it took awhile to write i think it is probably the longest first chapter to have ever been released by me. :moustache:

1651658 1651666 Thanks I have been to working harder at getting the best that is me available.

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.....admitted, the title is funny. The rest...

He breathed.
“I hate you to the most deepest rends of out in in space and beyond to the worlds that are undescovred in our univuers. You are like an ass to unstone yourself and try to become king here! I am not you slav! I will not become your sex toys first victim! I am the black clawed son of death and a valcano that insisted to fuck the boobs of a cock that violates your mom on nonpony earth where Martin Willis is from with a plunger and a rake from the ass of her to the deep cock of your best friend Sombra hissing spoons of vomit into the crevice that is your pathetic but hugging life! i am a violent tornado ripping the shreds of this world and piecing the happines of ponies into a thin web of peace that i protect by belching magic flames to a princess and her favorite tought pony! Because i am the universe hugger and i keep the ponies happy and out of fear. i am the cutest long tongued tiny loved gift to rarity that ever shined like diamonds. I am the calm before a roar that shatters the peace of each one of your deep seated real life issues!”
He breathed.

all i see is wall of text

TL;DR

1651715 You are missing out.

1651833
its on my read later so ill give it a shot when im less tired... staying up all night doesnt help at all
\

As of writing this "Discords Handgina - The Gangbang Explosion Of Sadistic Throbbing Gloom!" has eight dislikes to nine ten dislikes. That's a powerful new best for apple short.

Sure, the story still has some serious legibility and wall of text issues, but things overall are trending in a fairly positive direction.

“Where is Willis yall?” Applejack fought through to the annunciation of her pressured being and violated pinkies bubble of lol with that repercussion of a knowledgable emote of wondering fear.

I have no clue what that's supposed to say, but I'm pretty sure you misused most of those words. It's like someone spilled a dictionary. I'm not sure if I should laugh or cry.

This is beautiful. It's like the second coming of squirrelking.

This is art. The perfection of this is beyond words.

1651629
1651643 Did you two just almost simultaneously post the same pic!

1652882 Beat him to it.

1652910 Well yeah, you are the great time traveling Regidar. I shall make you rue this day...well...what are you waiting for...starting rueing already. RUE!

I
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MOAR:flutterrage:

If you fail to deliver, i will be forced to un-birth you.

I love you, you cockjuggling thundercunt

AS, I f:yay:cking love you.

“like cause I have pony howdy found this fucking thing in his room when we were playing snoop on people you love earlier.”

Sounds like something out of Night Vale.

Will read later.

Lolcongrats apple short you made people like your story
I wish I could picture the faces of all the readers

I... All Hail High Lord Appleshort! HEIL! HEIL! HEIL!

-Chessie

Holy shit, apple short making something that people enjoy? While I won't read it due to my current aversion to clop, I must say that you have come a long way if you got that many people to enjoy your work. Good job. :yay:

Yes appleshort, you seem to have impressed quite a few people. well done.
*pats on back*

Wait a minute . . . apple short wrote a story that people are legitimately liking?

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I might actually have to read this.

1656852 I can't really tell how many of them are being sincere. They're either enjoying it in a so-bad-it's-good way of being entirely sarcastic, from what I can tell.

Yeah, though, it looks like apple short may be gradually evolving. Terrifying thought, really. What if Prince Martin Willis 3 is actually... (gulp)... GOOD?

1656964
The day that happens, I will commit seppuku. DO NOT TALK LIKE THAT!!!! Don't even talk about the possibility of a third Martin Willis. Just don't. :twilightangry2:

1657037 ...AS already said there would be one. So many times. Including at the end of the second one. One of his last blog posts before his hiatus mentioned that it was already in the works.

1657119 Better wash off that sword and practice slicing upward with a reverse grip...

1657129
Already working on it. Thank god for the bokken, without which I would be practicing with a real sword. And with my clumsiness, I'd probably lose a limb or two. :derpytongue2:

I'm not sure what a handgina is, but I'll honest, it's pretty funny.

Well appleshort, it would seem you're moving in a positive direction. That being said, it's still kind of a mess. So...good...job?:rainbowhuh:

Looks like I've got another dramatic reading to do later on today. :D

Spike almost had an orgasm just from looking at it. “Oh yeah well I am Spike!” he breathed “You will not defeat me.” He breathed deep. “I am a motherfucking fire breathing ass rending boob hunting bitch loving pony dating love guzzling tongue licking finger fucking ass breathing son of thunder and a scorpion combined to violence! That will create the heat to spawn demented unrest within any who dare cross my self imposed ease to prevent unneeded death!”
He breathed.
“I hate you to the most deepest rends of out in in space and beyond to the worlds that are undescovred in our univuers. You are like an ass to unstone yourself and try to become king here! I am not you slav! I will not become your sex toys first victim! I am the black clawed son of death and a valcano that insisted to fuck the boobs of a cock that violates your mom on nonpony earth where Martin Willis is from with a plunger and a rake from the ass of her to the deep cock of your best friend Sombra hissing spoons of vomit into the crevice that is your pathetic but hugging life! i am a violent tornado ripping the shreds of this world and piecing the happines of ponies into a thin web of peace that i protect by belching magic flames to a princess and her favorite tought pony! Because i am the universe hugger and i keep the ponies happy and out of fear. i am the cutest long tongued tiny loved gift to rarity that ever shined like diamonds. I am the calm before a roar that shatters the peace of each one of your deep seated real life issues!”
He breathed.
I am spike the dragon." he breathed deep. "i am your worsst nightmare when you cannot wake up and i haunt you by pushing you into the tracks of a train that wont stop and i am the chainsaw of vulgar giddy laughter that violates your tongue when you wake up! i am a tear that will not be seen! i am your only love when she is naked in the shower and you are not at home and so i fuck her. I am the worst possible enemy to have and i am not your friend! It is that you were destroyed within my fire that is grasped in deadness! You scelch breathed foul fucking chum fingered tit slipper puke generating slime slapping grim diced wipe pig with a cross eyed discord chain balled dick for breath fly wing chewing fridge living crude slumming fashion fail! You ate three hundred ant hill and to spit out bugs you pissed blood and licked it up with a thumb nail from the clogged outhouse at the farm where applejack and the other apple ponies live. you suck boobs like they are melons going rotten in your dirt flung sideways cracked finger slots and secretly you cant kiss for shit you you faggot craved hair snotter fuck trotting pony dragon eagle from shit world of that hangs you from a fly catching trash dump but hug.
He breathed once more so deeply his tail shook and his scales flayed in brillient splendar and beauty.
“I am a lover guzzling mud smuggling fire cheating death beating face fucking cock monster battling the sky for who gets seen first! When terror strickes I smack it ion into the motherfucking past like a weiner shoving pinstriped exterestial beast from the fourth dimension of dick weavers with breath made of shiver slipped metal and hair forged from dreams and the blood of ten billion slave ponies deep in transit! For i shatter diamonds with my weakest tooth and I split the fucking earth with my tail and any bitchpony with my pleasure seeking viral leaking saliva streaking purple dotted juggernut spliced sliced tongue of rage! You can suck my bird saving ass raving tick tock slut clock dick rock with your brown dot cleansing mouth hole that sucks on my shoes golden turd!s You gross flung shower smudge pimple zit fart reek fucking tiny dicked thick skulled balls deep between my clawed left third toe from the inside squeezing out your babies to their motherfucking doom!

I am laughing so hard that I think I'm going to die.

Thanks to everyone for all the kind words :twilightsmile: I am glad the story is turning out to be much better than my stories perviously when glanced at first for to be reviewed and seen. Hopefully I will have written and done chapter two to be out soon.

Is anyone else reminded of this?

--CEO Kasen

It's still bad, but you've improved, that's for sure.

The... the.... the fuck? How did even pass the submission?!

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