Theangryman
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58w, 5hPonies in the Real World
Before leaving the house I told Rainbow Dash to fly up in the clouds, so she wouldn't get spotted, but it was un-necessary as the town was still deserted. She gained a better idea of the place though, which was a bonus in-case she got lost later and I couldn't find her. I made my way through the quiet town the same way I did the last time I headed out, occasionally looking up every so often to make sure that the blue pegasus was still in tow.
Strolling through the main entrance to the empty park, I looked around cautiously before shouting up, "Hey Rainbow, it's safe to come down now!" I watched as a cyan streak darted down through the sky and landed ten feet ahead of me, before I beckoned her over to my side. Rainbow Dash trotted over to me, before looking around the deserted area. It must of looked different from above was my only logical reason as to why she did that, or maybe she could see something I couldn't. I never asked her why.
"So this is it then? I was expecting something... ya know..." Rainbow trailed off.
"'Ya know' what?" I asked her; curious as to what she thought I had in mind.
"Something else. This is just a field with a small play-park in it. I was expecting something at least 20% cooler." She replied. OH HOW BADLY I WANTED TO HUG HER RIGHT THERE. All that was going through my head was 'HNNNNNNGGG' at the time, so that probably explains why she was staring at me with a 'what on Earth are you doing?' look plastered to her face.
Fan boy moment over, I finally had control over my voice and told her to look down at the end of the field; It dropped downwards and was practically invisible from the end we were at, so she darted off and found out what was down there before I could stop her.
From the bottom of the field all I heard was a disappointed shout. "THERE'S NOTHING DOWN HERE!"
I chuckled before calling back to Rainbow Dash, "WELL YOU SHOULD OF WAITED FOR ME TO CATCH UP THEN!" I started to stroll leisurely down the field while carrying the picnic-basket, taking in the sight of the large oaks surrounding the lower edge of the park, along with the neighbouring fields and houses. It was quite a peaceful place to be on a calm day; I've had many a fond memory because of this place - Hoping this would be yet another. Eventually making my way down to the bottom of the park, I saw that Rainbow had already found a spot to set up lunch.
"Here's a good spot," She told me, indicating to the ground beneath her. I nodded in agreement, and sat down the basket next to her. Pulling out the blanket we were going to sit on, I asked her why she wanted to go on a picnic. Her reply was that it was a good way to get out of the house, and that it gave us some time to get to know each other a little bit better.
While setting up the plates, I asked "So why do you want to get to know me better? If things go to plan then you should be leaving soon." When I mentioned her leaving she looked away in disdain. To be honest, I didn't really want her to leave either.
Lying down on the grass, Rainbow replied, "This world seems like a nice place. Other than the freaky weather, it's just like home. Sure, I miss everypony back in Equestria, but I could get used to this."
"You're accepting this place awfully quickly." I questioned her, "I thought you would of been more homesick than this - and by the way, the rest of Earth isn't so nice; I'll explain why later though... don't want to ruin the happy mood..." I replied, trailing off so she couldn't catch the last part.
She seemed a little apprehensive of telling me why she was warming to Earth so quickly, which was reasonable behaviour when I found out why. I eventually managed to get her to tell me, but sometimes I wish I hadn't. Remember the crash Rainbow Dash mentioned earlier? Well... I'll just tell you what she told me...
Equestria, Sugarcube Corner, before the Pinkie-Copter accident:
"C'mon silly, It'll be fun!" Pinkie Pie giggled, while bouncing around her latest attempt at Earth pony flight, with a confused Rainbow Dash and a dumbfounded Twilight Sparkle watching her.
"How did you even get the parts to make this? In fact, how did you make this?" Twilight asked, before realizing she was questioning Pinkie Pie and face-hoofed at her own blunder.
"That was easy-peasy! All I had to do was ask Mrs. Cake for some flour and...", Pinkie rambled on; oblivious to the fact her two friends were ignoring her.
Rainbow Dash looked over to Twilight with an apprehensive look on her face, before speaking aloud. "This thing's gonna kill us! Why are we even helping her again?"
"Because we're her friends Rainbow Dash," Twilight retorted before carrying on, " and we should always help our friends when they're in need. Think back to Applejack and the apple-bucking season"
"Fair point, but bucking trees couldn't KILL US. If we fall out of the sky in that thing, then who could save us?" Rainbow replied.
Twilight looked over to the Pinkie-Copter and Pinkie Pie concerningly, before turning back to Dash and replying "I think that's why you're here, Dash."
"Oh, oh yeah. That makes sense." The chromatic mare replied, wondering why she didn't think of it herself.
"...and that's how Equestria was made!" The party pony turned to her two friends, finishing her rant on the making of the Pinkie-Copter Mk2, and asked "So what do you think? Wanna help?"
Twilight and Rainbow Dash both turned to each other, before turning back to Pinkie and nodded simultaneously.
"Okie-Dokie-Lokey! Get in!" The pink pony bounced over to the driver's seat of her bizarre contraption, before settling into the hoof-controls, starting up the rotor-blades and doing last minute pre-flight checks. Twilight nervously shifted her way over to the newly added passenger seat and strapped in, casting a safety spell around the impromptu helicopter making sure that it shouldn't fail mid-flight. Hopefully. Rainbow Dash was already up in the air, waiting for the take-off, practising a few aerial acrobatics while she waited.
"You ready yet?" The cyan pegasus called out impatiently to her friend, halfway through another loop in the sky.
"Yeah, let's go!" Pinkie giggled to her friend. After rising 20 meters into the air to meet up with Dash, they set off over Ponyville and took in the sights. For the chromatic pegasus, this was just another day of flying over the small town, except she had two of her friends with her in a machine that only Pinkie could of dreamt up. For Pinkie Pie, this was yet another sugar-fuelled experience with her best friends that she cherished so dearly. For Twilight, it was a sudden realization of her hidden fear of heights.
Having passed over the town, with Pinkie Pie pointing out every landmark she could see and recognise when they went over-head, they finally made their way to the Everfree forest. They were to meet up with Zecora, as Twilight wanted to pick up a few herbs and magical plants found only in the Everfree that the zebra said she would gather for her equine friend. It was also an excuse for the unicorn to pick up some of her favourite tea that the zebra was famed for brewing.
Flying closer and closer to their destination, Rainbow Dash took the time she had to try and pull-off a few tricks around the Pinkie-Copter attempting to show off as per usual. However, with this being the Everfree forest and nopony in control over the weather, no-one could have expected the following.
A sudden gale of wind blew the pegasus off-course, and caused her to slam directly into Twilight, breaking the unicorns concentration on the fail-safe spell. The shouting ponies in the back had distracted the main pilot, causing her to stop peddling and the rotor-blades to stop turning. Falling out of the sky, the three friends could only hope for the best as the ground started to catch up with them at an alarming rate.
Earth, Post-Crash
"... After blacking out, I woke up in your bed. You know the rest from there." Rainbow Dash finished her telling of the story, with a few tears starting to form in the corners of her eyes, but I still couldn't understand why she didn't want to go back to Equestria.
I sighed, before asking "That still doesn't explain why you don't want to go back home though. What has crashing got to do with it?"
Rainbow Dash had tears rolling down her checks by this point, before she cried out "BECAUSE I CAUSED THE CRASH! IS IT REALLY THAT HARD? IF I WASN'T SHOWING OFF THEN WE WOULD OF MADE IT!"
I was taken back by her sudden outburst. This wasn't like her at all, but then again, being in my world was unlike anything Rainbow Dash had ever done. By now, she was full-on sobbing and I couldn't think of anything. I racked my brain for ideas, going through everything she had told me, anything to make her think it wasn't her fault would of been good right now. I was thankful for the fact the town seemed empty; I hadn't seen another human all day. Thankfully I remembered one thing that Dash had told me when we first met.
I reached over and nudged her shoulder to grab her attention. "Hold on a sec, it's not your fault. Didn't you say that you heard..."
Not wanting to be seen crying like a little filly in front of others, Rainbow Dash opened her wings out and flew off and away. I watched as she darted up into the sky, wanting to avoid any contact with others. The pegasus must of been feeling pretty bad, because even when she was up in the clouds I could still hear her sobbing. I was too shocked by her shouting at me, not expecting Rainbow Dash to do anything like that, to do anything. I just watched as my favourite pony ran away, and I couldn't do anything about it.
'Fuck' was all that was going through my mind as the whole event unfolded before me. What am I going to do now?
Comments ( 4 )
Thanks for the criticism, I was kind of waiting for a response like this.
The reason why the beginning is so rushed is due to the fact I wasn't really writing it out like I have been for the other chapters. I only put it up on FiMFiction to see if anyone would appreciate what I can do. I'm not joking when I say this is the first piece of fictional writing that I've actually written. I personally would like to re-do every chapter as to make the story longer and add in more character development, but this is really something I only do in my spare time, which I don't have a lot of due to course-work and school. Life's a bitch that way.
You've mentioned brainstorming idea's before releasing a chapter too, which I do very frequently with one of my pre-readers whenever I get the time to. We've practically wrote the story together, with me spewing out ideas and him going over them to see if they'll pass. It's sort of a 'Is this any good?' *reads story* 'Yeah, but this could do with...' way of working.
You also mention 'Was I the inspiration for your story? In your description it said 'My Little Dashie' and several others, so I guess it is.' Sorry to disappoint, but I started writing this over seven weeks ago, way before I read your story - which is very good might I add. You do seem like you would make a good critic. How would you feel about pre-reading chapter 5 before it's out? I could do with improving it.







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