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Fiddlebottoms

Joined April 2012
290 followers

It is finished.

Stories (11)

Blog Posts (38)


After conquering yet another ancient evil, Twilight returns to her library. There, she encounters the ghost of King Sombra, who delivers a terrible warning about the dangers of helping emopones.

A touching, heartfelt tragedy, except it was written by Fiddlebottoms, so it is not.

First Published
16th Nov 2012
Last Modified
16th Nov 2012

Comments ( 32 )

#1 · 88w, 6d ago · 5 · ·

Good thing the store's open late. For some reason, I just realized how much I need a Friendship Express

#2 · 88w, 6d ago · 3 · ·

Spike for the win.  

#3 · 88w, 6d ago · · ·

Nope, sorry Twilight. There is no escape. History is going to repeat itself now, and you're just going to have to live with it.

#4 · 88w, 6d ago · 7 · ·

YOU HAVE JUST EXPLAINED EVERYTHING EVER.

I'm going to go back to crying now.

#5 · 88w, 6d ago · · ·

>>1624019

Thanks. A bunch of personal stuff has been going on this week, so I didn't have editing time for this one.

Also, you're the best critic on repetitions, so was Sombra's too much? I wanted to give him a verbal tic (like "once more"), but couldn't decide on one. Right now, he just gets a new phrase every couple paragraphs and runs it into the ground.

Sombra gets a 1% royalty on all sales of the Friendship Express. Please purchase one, he needs to buy the rest of his metal shirt.

#6 · 88w, 6d ago · · ·

>>1625964 Glad I can help

Nah, Sombra was fine

Metal shirt? I'll buy two, that's a serious matter

My tail of woe started
caught another

#7 · 88w, 6d ago · · ·

OH MY GOD

SMASHING PUMPKINS

I love you, Fiddlebottoms.

#8 · 88w, 6d ago · · ·

Ok, now that' I've read this story, allow me to revise my previous statement.

I'm IN love with you, Fiddlebottoms.

Even when you're writing comedic parodies, you still have that touch of a madman's jester. I applaud you, Champagne of Shame.

#9 · 88w, 6d ago · · ·

Oh so that's what happened to treetrunks. this is now my combined MLP adventure time head-cannon.

#10 · 88w, 6d ago · · ·

>>1626246

When I started writing this, the first thing I thought of was "Zero," (specifically, the part about "I'm in love with my sadness. Bullshit fakers, enchanted kingdoms") for the Crystal Ponies. But the story is mostly about Sombra, and I think the melodramatic martyrdom of "Bullet with Butterfly Wings" fits him better.

Plus, "Despite all my rage, I'm still just a rat in a cage," is just so ... :rainbowkiss:

>>1626334

I'm IN love with you, Fiddlebottoms.

No gay stuff, though. Well, unless you want to.

>>1627317

Crystal Ponies ... Crystal Dimension. Made sense to me.

I'd have to side with the Crystal Ponies on Tree Trunks, though. Episodes with her are like seeing your grandmother in a strip club.

#11 · 88w, 6d ago · · ·

>>1627444 THE WORLD IS A VAMPIRE

But Tonight Tonight... so melodic. :rainbowkiss:

XYU has dat unbridled rage.

1979 is pretty decent too. The whole album... gold.

And maybe some gay stuff. But only a little.

#12 · 88w, 2d ago · · ·

“Oooh, Spike,” she called upstairs, “there’s a visitor requesting the savior of the Crystal Empire!”

:rainbowlaugh: that was funny.

#13 · 87w, 4d ago · · ·

This story kind of reminds me of Tom The Rock...

#14 · 87w, 4d ago · · ·

Godiylhfgiskbohfoyeyid

WINDEX SMEARS!! HAAAAHAHAHAHAHAA-*cough cough- weeze* *inhale* HAAAHAHAHAA!!!

#15 · 87w, 2d ago · 1 · ·

I like this story a whole lot. Have a dollar.

I don't have a dollar, go find one.

#16 · 85w, 1d ago · 5 · ·

Sorry Twilight, your plan won't work because Spike is underage so he can't buy the beer.

#17 · 85w, 1d ago · 1 · ·

This was very funny, witty, and deserving of a fourth adjective to describe it.

Kudos.

#18 · 85w, 1d ago · · ·

Some spiteful part of her brain smiled at the idea that, even though he was immortalized in stain glass, he still slept less than inch from the floor.

I believe the term you're looking for is "stained glass".  "Stain glass" isn't a valid phrase that I'm aware of.

#19 · 85w, 18h ago · 1 · ·

Don't these bozos have a princess now?

Man I really need a Friendship Express...

#20 · 85w, 12h ago · 4 · ·

The mopey, personality-less, and thoroughly disappointing Crystal Ponies deserve to be made fun of, them and their tiny ewes.  Have a fave and upvote.

Pax
#21 · 85w, 8h ago · 1 · ·

NO! YOU MAY NOT HAVE YOUR ALCOHOL CRYSTAL PONIES.

#22 · 85w, 3h ago · · ·

That alliteration always attacks my funny bones.

#23 · 84w, 5d ago · 2 · ·

heh heh heh

made me laugh, so thumbs up.

#24 · 84w, 3d ago · · ·

Haha. The ending made me laugh a lot. Go, Spike! Go save the Crystal Empire again!

#25 · 83w, 5d ago · · ·

Well.... Except that there was no friendship express back then (new invention, ya know?), seems about right. :rainbowlaugh:

Wait... There is other solution too.

Look like crystal ponies and woe with those who returned. I.e just send them back with nothing. :twilightsmile:

Oh... That would be bad thing to do, right? And bad things are done by Sombra and the like. :twilightoops:

#26 · 83w, 1d ago · · ·

Astoundingly funny.

#27 · 78w, 6d ago · · ·

A wobbly start, but once the story finds it's stride, it's gold.

#28 · 76w, 4d ago · · ·

This is why we love you Fiddle.

#29 · 72w, 3d ago · · ·

Spike is best Crystal Savior:moustache: And Gods, I freaking died of laughter from reading this, love hearing of the Nightmare Realm (King Sombra's door) as I call it, it even caused the king to desecnd into darkness, very, very impressive a 15/10:pinkiehappy: Gods you are so good at writing bro:twilightsmile:

#30 · 69w, 2d ago · 1 · ·

>>1794378

Agreed.

If you want booze, help me sort these books. I'll pay you, and then you can go get booze. Otherwise, shut up and GTFO.

#31 · 6w, 5d ago · · ·

You, good sir, are brilliant.

Ten times the writer I am, that's for sure.

#32 · 5w, 1d ago · · ·

Wait, so does that mean that Twilight basically gave Spike away to a life of servitude in the crystal empire?

Geez.

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