The Equine Hypothesis
Sheldon groaned in discomfort. His body ached and his eyes felt like they were on fire. His back felt sore, and there was something uncomfortable digging into his spine. He awkwardly attempted to shuffle himself off the unpleasant surface, to no avail.
"Is it having a seizure, or something?"
"I don't know Rainbow. It's definitely experiencing some sort of spasm."
"Um, should we help it? It looks like it could use help..."
After about a minute of shaking himself in different directions simultaneously, Sheldon decided his efforts were in vain. With his choices limited, Sheldon fought the pain and summoned forth the energy to open his eyes. The bright light emitting from the sun, impaired his vision but he could barely make out the outlines of six oddly shaped midgets, standing before him.
"Hey, he's opening his eyes! This is so super-fantastically-amazingly-awesome! That means we can throw a 'Congratulations on seeing things for the first time ever party'!"
"Uh, Pinkie, Ah don't think this is the first time he's opened his eyes. He wasn't jus' born."
"Girls, quiet! We don't know how it'll react to us yet. My 'First encounters with the Wilderness' book, said first impressions are everything."
Sheldon may be temporarily blind, but that didn't mean he was deaf. He had been listening to the females' banter back and forth, with stunned intrigue.
Must be some sort of circus comedy act
After the sun's illuminating glow and finally vanished from his sight, he could get a better look at those, who's company he shared.
A lump formed in the throat of a flabbergasted Sheldon, who was currently locking eyes with six, small, multicolored, equine creatures.
Darn it, Sheldon. You promised your mother you wouldn't do drugs
"Hi! My name's Twilight Sparkle, can you speak?" asked Twilight, with a hearty smile.
"You're a horse." Sheldon stated. "Horses don't talk."
"Hey pal, I think the word ya lookin' for there is ponies," Rainbow Dash corrected, with a frown.
"Ignore her," stated Twilight, subtly shaking her head at Rainbow Dash.
Sheldon said nothing, and continued to gaze at the six, scientific anomalies.
"Sorry if we seem rude, but... what are you exactly? Do you live in the Everfree forest?" questioned Twilight, with a hint of curiosity.
Sheldon remained silent for a few seconds before answering. "I'm a theoretical physicist and I live in Pasadena. Not that that's any concern of yours."
"Oh, I'm terribly sorry if I seem too nosy! I just have so many questions; I mean, where is Pasadena? Do all 'theoretical physicists' come from that place? How did you end up here?"
All the ponies stared at Sheldon expectantly for an answer, who offered nothing more than a blank expression. Sheldon had actually stopped listening to the horses and was instead focusing on the last question the purple one asked. How exactly did he end up here?
Well, I remember leaving the apartment and going to my office
The realization suddenly struck him.
He fell. In the corridor, on the way to his office. He tripped over something and hit the ground.
Dear lord, I must still be unconscious on the floor
"Hey uh, you still with us big guy?" asked Rainbow Dash.
"You think he's napping with his eyes open? I do that all the time!" Pinkie exclaimed, as she dropped to the floor and performed a series of fake snoring sounds, with her eyes still open.
"Um, Mr theoretical physicist... you still with us?" asked Twilight.
Sheldon snapped out of his thoughts and turned his head to observe the surrounding scenery. He was slumped against the rough bark of an aged tree, next to a large forest clearing. The sun's warm light, cascaded beautifully through the falling Autumn leaves, floating down from the branches above. Birds chirped to each other, high in the treetops overhead, and the blue, scenic sky, produced not a single cloud.
It was truly the perfect day. The epitome of life, outdoors. Unfortunately the two things Sheldon despised the most about being outside was 'nature' and 'being outside'.
Sheldon gave a long, exaggerated sigh. "Come on Unconscious mind, I'm disappointed in you. You could have at least made the environment look like the Starship Enterprise."
The group exchanged confused glances.
Sheldon turned his head around to meet the ponies' gaze once more. "And what's the deal with the horses? I hate horses. Unless I'm under the effect of some narcotic substance with hallucinogenic side-effects, then I'm unable to comprehend the logic of horses exchanging words with me." Sheldon considered the unlikeliness of this scenario, "Lord knows, the only mind expanding drug this man enjoys is called 'school'."
"Whatcha' tryin' to say there partner?" asked Applejack, hesitantly. "Ah hope yer not insulting us."
Sheldon flinched as soon Applejack began talking. He turned to face the cowpony, and gawked for several seconds.
Applejack let out a clearly uncomfortable cough, and it was obvious she found the strange creature's behavior unnerving. She shifted, anxiously and tried her best to avoid eye-contact.
It wasn't until Sheldon broke the silence, did the awkward atmosphere subside.
"Mom?"
Applejack pawed the ground, her emerald green eyes fluctuating, rapidly between her friends and the creature. "Beg yer pardon, sugarcube?"
Sheldon continued to stare, as if in some sort of trance. Sure the accent wasn't identical, but it was most certainly there.
"Listen, darling. Could you perhaps explain things more clearly? We're really not understanding you," asked Rarity.
The question freed Sheldon from his momentary daze, and he addressed the legged marshmallow. "All of you are just fragments of my subconscious. The orange one is my mom." Sheldon smiled, and reached out to gently touch Applejack's face.
Applejack gave a forced chuckle as she backed away slowly. "Hehe okay, gettin' a bit too 'touchy feely' there, sugarcube."
"Seems you have an admirer," teased Rarity, batting her lashes at the blushing cowpony.
"OOOOHHHHH, What's that thing?" Pinkie interjected, pointing towards a mechanical rectangle lying on the ground. "Is it a frisbee? Can I throw it? Oh, wait, wait, is it an edible Frisbee? Can we eat it too!?"
Sheldon squinted his eyes as he scanned the nearby terrain. He eventually found his prized possession, lying face down next to a moss-covered rock. He summoned forth all his energy and made a crawl for his laptop, doing his best to ignore the inevitable grass-stains that will soon be present on his clothes.
"Oh, that's okay. I can get your frisbee for you!" Pinkie announced, as she bounced over towards the foreign object.
"NO, DON'T YOU TOUCH THAT."
Pinkie stopped, mid-bounce and fell back to the ground. Sheldon's sudden outburst had certainly startled the group, especially Fluttershy, who produced a quiet squeak as she covered her face with her pink mane.
The ponies remained silent, as Sheldon arrived at his destination and practically leaped onto his laptop, clutching it tighter than he'd ever had before.
"You sure are protective of that thing, aren't you," stated Twilight, cautiously.
"That 'thing'?" repeated Sheldon, with disgust. "That 'thing' is an Alienware M17 x Gaming laptop."
"A what now?" asked Applejack.
"We've been through this a million times mom; and before you ask, no. I didn't get rid of it after you selfishly instructed me to last time, it's not 'sinful', it's a technological innovation. if God hates it so much, why doesn't he come down here and take it from me himself?"
A speechless Applejack turned to Twilight for support.
"Uh, well listen. I'm sure you're pretty tired. How about we go to the Library and you can get some rest," offered Twilight.
"My mom said I shouldn't go anywhere with strangers," stated Sheldon, gesturing towards Applejack. "Isn't that right mom?"
"Uh, I, well... um," stammered Applejack.
Twilight had an idea, and she hastily trotted over to Applejack's side and whispered something into her ear.
None of the others could distinguish what was being said, but they could take a guess. Applejack's cheeks flamed from within, and she vigorously shook her head in decline.
Sheldon remained seated upon the lush, green vegetation. His laptop secured firmly against his chest; he looked up at Applejack, expectantly.
The noticeable frown and drawn-out sigh, suggested that Applejack had finally submitted to Twilight's proposal.
She took a deep breath and turned around to face Sheldon. " Uh, it's okay sugarcube. I did say that but err... these aren't strangers, these are my friends!"
"Are these the people you go to church with every Sunday?" asked Sheldon.
"They err... they sure are!" exclaimed Applejack, with an exaggerated smile. "So now that that's settled; why don't ya'll come to the library."
"Dear Celestia! This sure is one weird animal" interjected Rainbow Dash.
Sheldon scowled. "You're a horse. A blue horse. A blue horse with a rainbow colored mane. If the 'Gay Rights Social Movement' ever had need for a mascot, you would be the first person they would turn too," Sheldon continued. "Oh but wait. You're also religious, and you attend church every Sunday. It surprises me they haven't kicked you out already, provided you look this ridiculous in real life."
"What the hay did you just say about me!?" demanded Rainbow Dash, as she darted forward and pushed her snout into his face.
"Oh, I apologize. Did I just send a rush of Neurotransmitters to your Medulla, and increase your blood pressure and adrenaline levels?" Sheldon retorted.
"Anywaaay...," stammered Twilght, as she desperately attempted pull Rainbow Dash away from Sheldon. "We should really get a move on. It's getting dark, and the Everfree forest really isn't the place to be after dark."
"Um, yes. We should go," suggested Fluttershy.
Sheldon used his free arm to heave himself upright. Once he was on his feet, the height difference became, instantly more noticeable. The small horned creatures, came to around his lower torso, and that's including their horns. The other's barely made his waistline.
The distinction in height, was also more visible to the other party as well. Rainbow Dash seemed slightly less inclined to engage the creature, and merely pouted as she struggled her way free from Twilight's grasp and took to the sky.
"Okay, let's leave," agreed Sheldon, after doing some light stretching.
The group made they're way along the pathway, leading out into the small village in the distance. Applejack stared at the ground, while clenching her teeth; with Sheldon walking so uncomfortably close to her. Fluttershy cheerfully hummed to passing ladybugs, and Rainbow Dash flew high above, performing aerial acrobatics. Rarity applied gracious amounts of sunscreen to her cheeks, while Pinkie bounced along without a care in the world. There wasn't much conversation, but nobody cared. It was a beautiful day in Equestria, and nothing was going to ruin that. Strange creature or no strange creature.
After a few minutes of silent wandering, the group arrived at their destination.
Sheldon looked up at the wooden sign, that was perched gracefully over the ground.
'Welcome to Ponyville'
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Well there we are, new chapter out
I hope to god this doesn't start some terrible religious debate. I respect all religions obviously, I'm just trying to keep Sheldon in character here.
Also I apologise this chapter isn't so long. My attention span renders me unable to write anything above 'around 1000 words' without me totally messing it up
I like how everything is developing so far! When is the next update?
1599424
Thank you!
I'm gonna try to update this once every 2 days or something.
I would love to update every day but I'm really busy with college and my job, so I don't usually get free time, and when I do I'm pretty tired and I don't wanna write a crappy chapter with tons of grammar mistakes n stuff and look like a total idiot
Bazinga!
Oh god my sides! This is hilarious.
1599355
Same here, bro.
Quite interesting. Would rather enjoy seeing this continue post haste.
He brings awkwardness to new, higher levels.
alright, this is pretty funny
My God this is Hilarious! Thats EXACTLY what would happen if Sheldon where to End up in Eqestria
You officially got my attention. I doubt you care, but seriously, that was pure gold, my my mind. I died.
Of course Sheldon finds this a dream, though he's definitely disappointed there's no Star Trek. ... Unless Discord got free and talked to him (since Lancie is Q in Star Trek). No doubt THAT would be mentioned!
So far, this is pretty funny, and I'm starting to like Sheldon here, because he definitely sounds like himself, because if there's one thing crossovers have trouble with is getting not only the MLP characters right, but others from the show, who have to accept the concept of talking, magical ponies. So though we're into only two chapters, it's pretty good thus far.
No. I refuse to read this story... Until you publish another chapter that is.
Sheldon: Mom?
Ah need ta stop drinken
Applejack: ...?
Sheldon: Mom?
Applejack: ...Pardon?
Sheldon: Your my mom.
Applejack:
Me:
This is ingeniousness!
Seems like you got Sheldon down to a T, with him interpreting AJ as his subconscious representation of his mom is just pure gold!
Pffffff hrchl mmmmmmmwahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
More! I like it!
Bronydragon
TCH! THIS IS HILARIOUS!!!
MOAR!!
Love how in character SHeldon is, but the whole deal with himand Applejack is scaring me just a bit.
AH MAH GAWD!!!!!!!!!! SO GOOD!!! BRAVO! BRAVO!!
*standing ovation*
I was so impressed with Sheldon's dialog, and THEN you hit me with that HILARIOUS Aj-Mom joke. Oh mah stars! Ah've never thought of that, and you had me laughin' harder than a Pinkie partyin' with 20 other Pinkies. OH CELESTIA!! THANK YOU!!!!
THANK YOU!!! BWAHAHAHAHA. I honestly (pinkie promise) was on the floor laughing. ON THE FLOOR LAUGHING. OMG.
You're so full of win. Ah'm gonna read again. Thank you so much!!
cache.ohinternet.com/images/thumb/2/2d/Trollface_HD.png/618px-Trollface_HD.png
Oh I'm sorry. Have I just sent a rush of Neurotransmitters to your Medulla, and increased your blood pressure and adrenaline levels?
Another great chapter!
1601054
Haha, thank you! I'm glad you enjoyed it!
Comments like yours really boost my self esteem.
1601181
Thank you!
Sheldon: You're my mother
Applejack: God damnit Twilight! Ah told ya to stop casting futa spells on me when ah'm drunk!
Ohh man that is hilarious
Hehe. AJ is Sheldon's mommy!
Sheldon be trolling! 
Hilarious chapter indeed.
lol he should marry twilight, lol...
1599355
don't worry I am Christian but sheldon is my fav character because of how he reacts to religious events 
says its brainwashes people 
but my grandma doesn't like the show though
Loved the part were sheldon made AJ his mom XD
t0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcSoMo6Bcqt94Eq49zxszTpbm2McRjYaCRWtP4VtgemAElWK8EgG&t=1
I'm kind of surprised twilight didn't pick up on the "theoretical physics" part. That seems like something she'd geek out over. Though Sheldon interpreting AJ as a subconscious manifestation of his mom was hilarious.
"Oh I'm sorry. Have I just sent a rush of Neurotransmitters to your Medulla, and increased your blood pressure and adrenaline levels?" said Sheldon with an expression resembling the common 'trollface'.
Translation-U Mad?
1599827 Agreed good, sir. I would actually discribe it as pure genius.
Hoof? Meet face.
DON'T FUCK THIS UP!
That is all...
This is one of the funniest things I have ever read! Sheldon is completely in character. I can only imagine what will happen when he realizes he is not unconcious...
ooooooooooh my god this is to fucking amazing for words
Oh my God I can totally imagine the pauses for audience laughter this is just like the show I LOVE BBT AND I LOVE MLP:FIM THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR WRITING THIS
excuse me ladies and gentleman, we interrupt this fic for a important announcement:
Dr Sheldon cooper for the win, that's Dr Sheldon cooper for the win, thank you
sheldon wakes up on the floor of the science center with princess celestia looking at him. celestia then says, "Bazinga!" and disappears.
Wow, actually further into this than I expected to have found a blaring error...
But yeah, Equestria is behind on science, but they evidently know enough that Twilight might just know what a physicist is. And that it's a profession, not a species. This is a line I would expect from Rainbow Dash or Pinkie Pie, not Twilight...
Not an error, just noting my own surprise that Sheldon is actually applying objective logic to his situation. Given how this fic has been written so far, this was actually a pleasant surprise.
Was he supposed to say something after this line? Because if not, then you're missing a quotation mark at the end of this sentence.
Sheldon thinks he's dreaming, and thus latches onto the female Texan voice as his mind's representation of his mother by way of abstract psychological symbolism. This is actually so clever that I'm sincerely interested in what you're going to do with it.
God damnit! I'm friggin' pissed I can't be friggin' pissed at this plot-point, that's how good it is!
Ah, THERE we go! Okay, I know Sheldon's mom is a fundie loon (I'm an atheist myself, and TOTALLY with bagging on idiotic religious ideas) but she's not freaking Amish dude. Unless she has some prudish objection to the Internet and all the debauchery therein, I don't think she's a technophobe, or at least that's not how I remember it...
Oh gee, THANKS! I'd have never figured out she was blushing because she was EMBARRASSED! If you hadn't specifically TOLD me, I'd have thought she was coming ON to him or something! Seriously, show-don't-tell. We don't need you to explicitly tell us she's blushing "in embarrassment" or that somebody is scowling "in anger". Some things go without saying, or can at least be communicated in a way that doesn't spoon-feed the reader the subtext.
Again, you could cut this ENTIRE damn sentence, as it serves us nothing but to explicitly TELL us what we should be able to GUESS.
Also, is it going to be explained what the ENTIRE mane six were doing there, or is that just for convenience sake?
I just wanted to let you know, lay off the the "sugarcubes" and "darlings" for Applejack and Rarity respectively. They do not say those things THAT often in the show, so they should not be saying them that often here.
BWAHAHAHAHAHA
It makes sense, that Sheldon, being unable to comprehend something, would latch onto the nearest possible scientific explanation.
ACTIVATE SCIENTIFIC MIND
This is gonna be good.
Now you're making me fuckin' angry... I used to like Sheldon, now I don't. Damnit... I mean, how can I let him insult RD like that?
I've never watched BBT, even though everyone says I should (partially because I understand some Quantum Physics while I'm still in high-School), but I fins this hilariously addicting. One More Chapter. One More Chapter.
2609565 To be fair, you can't expect him NOT to have problems with... well anything actually. The idea of anyone going to Equestria would be absurd and mind screwing for anyone. Now when that person is SHELDON... I believe I've made my point lol
Loving this! This story is taking my two favorite shows and making them something amazing! So thank you. Very very much.
2733922
He had problems with giving up a napkin. What makes you think he's just going to let this one fly?
pun not intended
Silly Dash, ponies are horses. Just smaller
I don't know if the author should be saying "somebody" or "somepony"