• Published 7th Jan 2012
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Phoenix Wright - Turnabout Storm! - Firesight



A famous racer is found dead in the Everfree, and Rainbow Dash stands accused of his murder. Can an Ace Attorney from another world uncover the truth and prove her innocent, or will Rainbow Dash be banished to the sun for a crime she didn't commit?

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Part 17 - Room Raiders

Despite his determination to resume the investigation and visit the hotel room immediately, Phoenix found his attention—and appetite—drawn by the enticing aroma of sweets and coffee coming from a cottage that looked like it had jumped right out of the pages of Hansel and Gretel, made to look like it was constructed completely from candy. An outside sign announcing it to be the aptly named Sugar Cube Corner, Phoenix found his mouth watering as they passed it—he hadn’t had a proper meal, just a pretrial snack since arriving—and Pinkie noticed, all but shoving him inside.

Once there, he met the proprietors—a pleasant blue-and-beige earth pony couple with cupcake and baking cutie marks unimaginatively but appropriately called The Cakes, who plied him with fruit and pastries as a thank-you for defending Rainbow Dash. Pinkie got into the act too, all but stuffing a pair of her pink-frosted cupcakes in his mouth, insisting he try them.

To his surprise, they were unquestionably delectable—the best baked goods he’d ever had—and he also had to admit the confectionary’s coffee was light-years better than the cheap stuff he normally got at the courthouse and police station back home.

Wow—this place could give the high-end coffee houses I know a run! he realized as he started into his second cup.

Sated and feeling far more himself than he had all morning—did his sleep deprivation have something to do with his poor trial performance as well?—he followed Pinkie another block to their original destination, polishing off the coffee and licking the frosting off his fingers as he went.


Hay and Stay Hotel
June 10th, 12:53 PM

“Daaaaa da la~ dada daaa da da daaat da daa… … Dat daa~ da daaa…” Pinkie hummed to herself as they reached the hotel, which by Phoenix’s lights wasn’t all that impressive compared to the Gatewater and other high-end hotel chains he knew back home.

Kind of funny, though. That song she’s singing sounds strangely familiar, Phoenix realized as they reached the hotel, tossing his empty cup in a wastebasket by the front door. He was sure he’d heard that tune before, but for the life of him couldn’t remember where.

Pinkie smuggled him into the hotel by throwing a blanket she somehow produced over his head and telling him not to peek. He couldn’t fathom how it could work, but somehow it did; she pulled the blanket off him to find himself under an interior stairwell—they walked down a second-floor corridor, dodging a couple cleaning crews until Pinkie spotted the room number they were looking for.

“Lookie, Feenie! Here’s the room!” she announced, jumping up and down in excitement.

Phoenix took out the key that Rainbow Dash had given him, but hesitated at using it. “Do you think we’ll get in trouble for going in without asking?” he worried, having second thoughts as he saw no police tape but a do-not-disturb sign hanging off the doorknob, worried again about going into a possible police investigation site without permission.

To little surprise, Pinkie Pie seemed to have no qualms about breaking the rules. “It’s to help Rainbow Dash, right? Then who cares?” she told him, causing Phoenix to suddenly wonder if she was somehow channeling Maya at that moment. “If anypony complains, we’ll just tell them we’re room service!”

“For a dead guy?” Phoenix couldn’t help but facepalm, feeling a surprisingly strong sense of unease at entering the room. “Actually, Pinkie? I’m really not comfortable with this. Maybe first we should—”

“Aw, don’t be such a chicken, Feenie! Here, gimme that key!” With that, she snatched it right out of his hand and turned with it towards the door.

H-hey! We can’t just—” Phoenix tried to reason with her to stop, but it was too late; Pinkie already had it in the lock, leaving him open-mouthed as she worked it—how can she hold something like a key with her hoof?

Oblivious to the impossibility of what she was doing, Pinkie turned the key, her delight in breaking the rules and entering areas she wasn’t allowed in very much reminding Phoenix of Maya at that moment. “We just give it a twist, aaaaand…” The lock clicked open and she turned the doorknob, entering immediately as soon as the door swung free. “We’re in! Pinkie Pie, Master of unlocking!” she boasted, taking a deep bow and then tossing the key back to him.

I really hope I don’t get sent to the Sun for this! Phoenix gulped to himself as he put the key back in his jacket pocket, sweating a bit as he stepped through the open door.

As Phoenix examined the hotel room, the first thing he noticed was it had two pony-sized beds against the back wall, which struck him as odd as he thought the only occupant of the room was the victim. Maybe they were out of singles? Two large bookshelves mirrored each other on the facing walls of the small room, each filled with an array of different volumes.

As he scanned a few of the spines, he wondered why there would be so many books in a simple hotel room and guessed it was due to the fact Equestria didn't have television or internet, so the books simply substituted for that in the bizarre world he now occupied—which, the more he thought about, almost struck him as an early 20th century analog for his own in terms of architecture, technology and décor; the apparent ‘Stallion of Liberty’ picture on the back wall notwithstanding.

On the right side of the room, Phoenix noticed a wooden ladder propped up against a bookshelf and was instantly relieved Maya wasn’t present, else she’d want to start tweaking him over its proper name. Towards the front, an ornate but single table stood with a few papers—or was it papyrus given some of them were rolled up into scrolls?—lying on top of it, breaking the theme of twin furniture the room seemed to have.

“Well, now that we’re here… seeing as how Ace is dead, surely he won't mind if we look around?” Phoenix asked rhetorically.

“My name is Pinkie, not Shirley!” she corrected, causing Phoenix to blink before letting out a groan of annoyance. “So what are you trying to find here, Feenie? A magical stone? A secret chamber? A prisoner? A goblet? Maybe something you ordered? Oatmeal?” She rattled off a list of items Phoenix couldn’t help but find strangely familiar.

He shook his head to clear it, having a hard time following her quick changes of subject. “Oatmeal? Why would anybody want to find oatmeal?” he asked, wondering what that had to do with the other items she mentioned.

“Duh! When they’re hungry!” Pinkie said brightly.

Phoenix was starting to get exasperated, rubbing his forehead and letting off a huge sigh. She’s still not growing on me, Rainbow! “No, Pinkie Pie, we’re trying to find clues that relate to the murder,” he explained.

Her expression dropped. “So, no oatmeal?”

“No oatmeal,” Phoenix confirmed, trying not to roll his eyes.

“Awwwww…” a crestfallen Pinkie said in dismay, falling back on her haunches and putting on a pouting face.

Phoenix didn’t understand how her mind worked, and he wasn’t sure he wanted to. “Look, let’s just get this search done quickly, okay? I don’t want to be caught here, so let’s try and finish this as soon as humanly possible,” he added, looking around nervously.

“Alright! I’ll try to be as fast as pony-ly possible then!” Pinkie remarked, causing Phoenix to let out another huge sigh.

“Right.” Maybe it was a mistake taking her in here along with me, he was starting to think, even if he had gotten some excellent coffee and cupcakes out of the deal.

Just then, Pinkie noticed something out of the corner of her eye. “Look Feenie, a step-ladder! Is that a clue?” she asked in excitement, bouncing up and down again.

Phoenix grimaced and couldn’t help but wonder if Pinkie Pie was channeling Maya again. “One: that’s not a clue. Two: that’s not a step-ladder; it’s a ladder,” Phoenix enlightened her, hoping she’d take the correction with less resistance than his assistant normally did.

“There’s a difference?” Pinkie asked, tilting her head at him in confusion.

“There’s a big difference!” Phoenix proclaimed, a pet peeve of his having been triggered. “A step-ladder has an A-frame that folds while a ladder is flat and just leans against something like that one. It really bothers me when people don’t know the difference!”

She gave him another cockeyed glance, then looked back at the ladder, studying it. “I still don’t see what the difference is. I mean, you still step on it, right? Wouldn’t it be a STEP-ladder then?” Pinkie reasoned, striking a pondering pose that mimicked his.

“How can I put this in a way you’ll understand?” Phoenix wondered aloud, looking up and scratching his chin. “It’s like cupcakes and muffins.”

“Cupcakes and muffins?” Pinkie tilted her head at him again.

“Exactly! Both look kind of the same, but they’re totally different, like ladders and step-ladders,” he began, groping for an effective analogy. “Cupcakes have frosting on them, like how step-ladders have a folding frame on them, while the muffin is plain, like the ladder is flat,” Phoenix tried, hoping the odd comparison would make sense to the Pinkie Pie's decidedly odd mind.

To his surprise and relief, Pinkie seemed to understand. “OOHHH! I think I get it now! Like hacksaws and saws!” she said, making a surprising comparison of her own. “Why do they call them hacksaws anyway?”

Phoenix was caught off-guard. “Huh?” he asked, suddenly feeling an odd and unpleasant tingle, like a chill going down his back.

Oblivious to his discomfort, she continued on, every bit as bubbly as before. “I don’t get it—hacksaws don't hack; hacking is what you do with daggers and axes! AND KNIVES!!” she exclaimed with another pronk, never losing her smile but acting like she was discussing a subject she really liked.

Phoenix had a sudden and very strong urge to back away slowly, the hairs on his neck sticking straight out. “Uh… yeah,” he said agreeably even as he felt something unspeakably grim in the air around him; he swore the temperature of the room had dropped ten degrees as she spoke.

Okay, seriously, she’s freaking me out now! he thought, unable shake the feeling that Pinkie had a hobby he really didn’t want to know about.

“But you sure know a lot about ladders, Feenie! Are you sure you’re a lawyer and not actually a ladder connoisseur?” Pinkie asked, dropping the subject to his great relief.

“It’s just common sense!” Phoenix said with a sigh, not sure if he’d imagined a temporary temperature drop or not. “I find it annoying that a lot of people don’t know the difference between the two,” he added, but then something clicked. “Wait a minute. Wasn’t the victim a pegasus? Why would he need a ladder anyway? He could just fly up to get the things he would need a ladder for,” he reasoned.

“Maybe he was superstitious and didn’t want bad luck!” Pinkie suggested, still all smiles.

He gave her a look at that. “Keeping a ladder doesn’t prevent bad luck. You get bad luck from walking under a ladder!” he corrected her, but his earth pony companion had already been distracted by something new, reaching down to pick something up off the wooden floor.

“What about this? Is some ripped-up paper good luck?” Pinkie asked, showing him a piece of partially crumpled-up letter scroll held in her hoof.

“It’s a ripped-up piece of paper. Why would it be good luck?” I need an aspirin! he thought, feeling a headache coming on the longer he spoke to Pinkie.

“Guess you’re right, it just says a bunch of mumbo-jumbo on it anyway!” she said, squinting an eye at it.

That caught Phoenix’s attention. “Mumbo-jumbo? Let me see it!” He held out his hand, still marveling how she could hold something in her hoof as she passed it to him. Un-crumpling it as best he could—whatever it was made of, it was thicker than the paper he knew back home—he read it aloud:

“This is a letter announcing my resignation from your employ. After the Equestrian 500 is over, I can no longer work for you. We made quite a team but I—” the words ended at the edge of the tear. “Then it cuts off. The rest must be on the other half! Pinkie! You found a clue!” Phoenix announced, scarcely able to believe it.

“I did? Is that good luck?” She wanted to make sure.

“No! W-well… yes. Kinda! Good job, Pinkie!” he praised in no small amount of amazement.

“YAY!!!” Pinkie jumped for joy.

“It would only make sense that Ace wrote this, since it’s his room. But who was he writing it to?” Phoenix scratched his chin, pondering the question.

“Maybe he—” Pinkie began to suggest, only to gasp loudly when her tail started to tremble. “OH NO!!”

This made Phoenix jump in surprise, his shoulder accidentally banging one of the bookcases. “Ssshhhh!!!! We aren’t supposed to be in here, remember? What’s the problem!?” Phoenix asked, sticking a finger in front of his lips and quickly steadying the bookshelf with his other hand.

“My tail’s twitching!” Pinkie exclaimed.

Phoenix blinked at the nonsensical statement, not understanding why he was still surprised at anything she did or said. “So? My foot fell asleep, but you don’t see me freaking out!” Phoenix retorted, but before he could say anything more, Pinkie dove head first under the table and stayed there.

What’s with the duck and cover? “Pinkie Pie, please stop fooling around and—” he was cut off as something large suddenly tumbled off the very top of the bookshelf and hit him right on the crown of his skull.

“OW!!” He let out a cry of pain, cringing and clutching at his head while the object that hit him tumbled to the ground, sending Phoenix falling to his knees beside it.

“See? I warned you!” Pinkie admonished, crawling back out from under the table.

“W-what?! You didn’t warn me that something was going to fall on my head!” Phoenix all but hissed, spitting out each word through pain-gritted teeth.

“Sure I did! I said my tail was twitching. That means something’s gonna fall!” Pinkie claimed as if it was self-evident, making Phoenix even more annoyed.

“That’s ridiculous! You can’t tell me you can make predictions like that based on body spasms!” Phoenix shot back, while Pinkie Pie was studying the fallen object—a very thick book.

“So, what’s that book say?” she asked, completely unperturbed.

“You mean the thing that fell on my head?” Phoenix replied grumpily, picking it up and looking at the cover with one hand while his other still rested on his head, rubbing the growing lump there. “It looks like some sort of spellbook,” he told her, trying to force his crossed eyes to focus.

“Spellbook? Coolamundo! Hey Feenie, can you cast spells? I can’t since I’m an earth pony,” she asked in perfect earnestness.

He looked at her like she was nuts. “Of course not! I’m not a unicorn! I can’t read it anyway… I only know it’s a spellbook because I saw Twilight reading one just like it this morning, and I asked her what it was. She said it was a reference book for magic full of advanced spells and enchantments that unicorns could cast,” he explained, wondering what the difference between the two was.

“I asked her about because the text wasn’t in English. It’s written in these weird hieroglyphics that I guess mean something if you have a horn,” Phoenix further noted as he flipped through the pages, finding something interesting about halfway through. “Huh? Look at this,” he said, lowering it so she could see.

Pinkie leaned over to read a decidedly non-hieroglyphic line. “Continue from here, third line,” she recited the short handwritten message, written in cursive on the upper and outer corner of the left-hoof page.

“Seems someone scribbled a note here,” Phoenix mused, his head starting to throb.

“Oooo… that’s a no-no! You can get in big trouble for writing on somepony else’s stuff like that! Do you know what Twilight would do if you jotted notes in the books you borrowed from her library?” Pinkie all but shivered, a nervous note to her voice.

Phoenix shook his head, re-aggravating his pain, wondering again what he’d done to anger the trial gods after everything that had gone wrong that day. Okay, other than turn in my worst-ever courtroom performance and cover it up by accusing an innocent pony of complicity in a murder? “No, I don’t think this is the hotel’s book. Twilight said these advanced spell books are only available in Ca… Can… Con…” he tried but finally gave up. “I forget the name, but it starts with a hard ’C’, as I recall.”

“Cookie?” Pinkie blurted out.

“No.”

“Cupcake?” she tried again.

“No!”

“Candy?”

Phoenix’s headache was getting worse. “No! No. Just, please stop guessing, Pinkie. The point is; this must be someone’s personal book,” he said as he made a point to snap several pictures of it with his camera, taking pains to get one of handwritten—or should that be hoofwritten?—note:

“Probably isn’t important, but sometimes little things like that matter. Still, guess I better put it back on the shelf just in case it is the hotel’s book,” Phoenix decided, trying to find where it had fallen from. “Now, where was this thing?”

“It was all the way up there,” Pinkie pointed up to an empty spot at the top of the bookcase roughly the same width as the book.

“I think I can reach it.” Phoenix stretched his body up high, suddenly wondering why the ceilings were so tall when ponies were so short. “Almost… got… it!” he said, standing on tiptoes. But then, just as he was only about half an inch short…

RRRRRRRRRRRIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIPPPPPPPPP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

“GAAHH!!! NOOOOOOoooOOO!!!” Phoenix shrieked, pulling his arm and the book back down.

“Hey! Didn’t you tell me to be quiet a second ago? Practice what you preach!” Pinkie scolded.

“But I ripped my suit!” Phoenix whined, putting the book on the second shelf instead of the top one lest he worsen the tear further.

Pinkie’s eyes went wide. “OoOOoooOOOooooo… you’re right, Feenie! You have a big hole in your armpit! Guess you should have used the step-ladder instead of reaching so high,” she admonished him in amusement.

“It’s a LADDER!” Phoenix said, fuming in frustration and anger. His head hurt, he was a pariah in Ponyville, Twilight hated him, Fluttershy was probably cowering in a jail cell, he was stuck with an oddball equine, and now on top of everything, he’d torn his favorite suit! “You don’t realize how bad this is, Pinkie! I can’t walk around with a big rip in my suit!” Phoenix whined, pinning his arm to his side to try and hide the tear.

“No use crying on spilled milk! Or ripped armpits!” Pinkie pronounced with a fresh smile on her face. Phoenix could only groan in response, experimentally pinning his arm to his side to try and cover the tear. He wondered if he’d be able to hide it for the duration of his time in court the next day, certain he’d hear no end of insults and jokes about it from Trixie if nothing else. Suddenly, Pinkie Pie piped up again. “Oh, lookie there, Feenie! It’s Rainbow Dash!”

His head shot up in confusion, his torn suit momentarily forgotten. “Huh? Where?” he asked, looking around but not seeing her, unable to fathom why she would be walking free.

“Right here on the table!” Pinkie pointed to another piece of partially curled thick scroll paper as Phoenix walked over to have a look. Unrolling it the rest of the way, he realized it contained a roster of names, written in what appeared to be the same elegant cursive handwriting as the note in the spellbook:

“Well, it’s her name, alright,” Phoenix mused, tapping the name at the top of the sheet. “But what is this? And why are Rainbow and these other ponies listed here?” he asked Pinkie.

Hmmm… Oh! I know! Maybe it’s a party invite!” she guessed, getting excited again.

Phoenix would have rolled his eyes if his head didn’t hurt so much, the lump on his head starting to throb. “Maybe. Do you know who these other ponies are, Pinkie?” he asked, showing her the list.

She ran down the list and shook her head. “Nope! Except for Rainbow Dash, none of these names are familiar. Dashie is the only one here I know!” Pinkie replied, her eyes widening as she realized—“Uh-oh! I have to find who these other ponies are!”

“Why?” Phoenix asked, confused—one thing he was starting to get about Pinkie Pie was that she always had a reason for saying or doing something, even if it didn’t initially make much sense to him.

“I throw a party for every new arrival in Ponyville!” Pinkie exclaimed, following that up with a very loud gasp of air. “That reminds me! I haven’t thrown a welcome party for you yet, Feenie! I’m really sorry; I just haven’t had the time today! But I’m sure I could put something together by tonight!” she assured him.

“Uh… that’s alright,” Phoenix offered carefully, giving her a sideways look and noticing she suddenly appeared quite saddened—the first time he’d really seen her lose her smile. She seems so upset about it… he recognized, feeling an odd pang of sympathy for her as he returned his attention to the list. “Tell you what, Pinkie—you can throw me a party when I get Rainbow acquitted,” he offered, deciding that if he was yet able to pull out a win after falling flat on his face that morning, he might actually deserve one.

Pinkie Pie instantly perked back up. “I can? Deal!” she instantly agreed. “In fact, once you prove her innocent, I think I’ll throw a Super-Duper Special Party for everypony!”

“Uh… sure.” Phoenix had no idea what that would entail, but decided he could suffer through a game or two of pin-the-tail-on-the-donkey as recompense for Pinkie’s help. Or would they call that something else here? “Hey, look next to Rainbow Dash’s name, Pinkie. It’s a time: ‘8:35’.” Phoenix observed, pointing at it.

Pinkie’s eyes got wide. “I was right! It’s a party invite! Rainbow Dash party at 8:35; got it! I’ll try not to be late this time! And even if you can’t come, I’ll save some cake just for you, Feenie!” she promised, her smile returning as quickly as it had left as she reared up and pinwheeled her hooves again, this time in giddy anticipation.

Phoenix was forced to disappoint her, tapping his fingers on the low tabletop as he considered what he found. “I don’t think so, Pinkie. I think this is something else entirely,” he answered, starting to get a very nasty suspicion about the purpose of the list. No proof yet, though. And what is it with Pinkie and parties, anyway? he additionally wondered, finally making the connection between her three-balloon cutie mark and what he was starting to gather was her favorite activity.

“You know? Tell me! Tell me!” Pinkie implored him, bouncing excitedly on her hooves again.

Phoenix gathered his thoughts carefully. “It’s more of a hunch than anything else, but I think it’s a—” he began, but before he could finish, the door opened behind them.

“And just who are you two?” an oddly familiar female voice demanded to know.

Both Phoenix and Pinkie froze at that moment. Oh no! we’re CAUGHT! the former realized, wondering if he was shortly going to find himself on the other side of the Detention Center windows.

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