Bussiness should be spelt Business.

Other than that, this was rather snazzy. I may read the others.

FINALLY, I was so excited for this one

P.s. magnum is the freaking best

Nice chapter, have some moustache.

>>15387011538701 Well its kinda hard to understand whats going on if you didnt read the first couple stories.

>>15394131539413

I did get that impression, yes. I'll read them once I'm done grammar Nazi'ing something.

>>15394191539419 Sounds positively delightful! Do enjoy yourself while you ..... grammar Nazi some stories

*Sighs* I hate to be a parrot, but Magnum's a dumb-arse.

This looks promising. Tracking.

>>15437841543784

but how can you hate magnum.

She's my favorite

Noooooo, DERPY!  Good chapter! Keep it coming

I don't know if everyone agrees with me but it seems as if your trying to save everypony in the story? I for one like it when the story has a sad twist that draws me in. It makes me feel for the characters on a deeper level.

>>17053771705377

It's one of those stories where everything is just fine and then suddenly- BAM. Everypony dies. I'm just saving everypony (for now) to prepare for the mass killing at the end

And thanks for commenting! Glad to hear from a reader!

I just couldn't stand seeing this empty so I added another comment.

neat, finally caught up with my reading.

I know this sounds stupid, but how do I post a story? When I click new story, there's no section for the story itself. Is there something I'm missing, or am I just dumb?

CaptainButch

Just create the story with the options they give you first, then once the story is created you can add chapters afterwards.

Yes update!

I liked the chapter but I'm still curious how come the doctor would no longer be a time lord? And how is derpy a mutant but isn't brain dead?

>>19760621976062

This is due to change, but...

-The new reality had a completely different timeline, and while it may share many similarities glitches still occur because of the immense amount of change that occurred in the universe, because the new reality is almost the exact opposite of the old one. Glitches like Rainbow and Silver are called 'Splinters', while there are other glitches as well like the Doctor not being a Timelord, and Melony coming back as a restored self with Neon.

-And Derpy is just Derpy. Doesn't make sense, and never will

Works for me.

Ok, you've been saying you want feedback, well here we go:

Nuclear devices don't use multiple chemicals, there are no incendiary nukes, they are nukes.  Either plutonium or uranium atoms are split in a fission device (Fat-Man/Little-Boy) or hydrogen is fused via tritium and deuterium in a fusion device.  By nature it is an incendiary device, just really damn mean about it.

A 9mm cannon would be a pistol.  9mm is basically the smallest effective round, weakest while still having a bit of stopping power.  This is the round in the Baretta M9 and the MP5 submachine gun.  A more effective round for a "cannon" would be a 30mm round like the one used in the GAU-8 Avenger on the Fairchild Republic A-10 Thunderbolt II.  The 30mm gatling gun is a monster, especially since it uses depleted uranium rounds.  The key is the 9mm caliber refers to a specific type of round, the 9x19mm parabellum.  The rifle version of the 9mm is actually the .375 caliber round.  The anti-materiel rifle that Magnum uses is a .50 caliber 12.7x99mm round which is bigger than the 9mm/.375 round.  

I believe there were some other technical issues but I can't remember them at the moment.  Great story otherwise.  And I love how fast you keep belting em out.

>>20780282078028

I'll just give your comment a thumbs up of approval while I remain my lazy self and not change anything, which might soon lead to my last resort of saying 'Screw Logic'

I thought you were going to be lazy and not explain the nuke or the 9mm thing. I chuckled when I saw your reasoning behind the 9mm bullets.

You.Magnificent.Bastard.

That had to be the most EPIC thing any author has EVER pulled straight out of their GODDAMN ASSES!

I applaud you sir.  You have won favorites and a follow.  Fucking.  Epic.  Win.

Fimfiction needs a mother fucking slow clap macro.

>>21603202160320

*sigh there it is again.  Although, it does have the 'sad' tag

Also, glad to see you're still reading this

Right in the feels.

Thought the alternate ending was humorous. Also you need to start wrapping up the story I'm not saying it has to be in the next two chapters, but it feels like nothing is happening. Like they go from one place to the next while not really gaining anything.

>>21962712196271

Once they get to Haven, and that's when everything truly kicks off- because rainbow delivers her speech, the whole of magic faction(and some other characters who will remain secret) will come out and it'll just be absolute chaos.

!!SPOILER ALERT!!

*************************************************************************************

You might be seeing an Ursa Major strolling onto the battlefield in later chapters.

Argh! I'm trying to catch up while still getting the content! I'm so going to miss the conclusion aren't I?

>>23428622342862

Might wanna watch out for some tiny details I'm throwing in there right now... They might turn out to be much more important in the conclusion;)

>>23432682343268 Doesn't matter i'm trying to finish the second one. Why did I put this off so long

Im surprised, none of the BH stories have more than 6 comments

Its so weird even the worst stories have some kind of comments, positive or otherwise.

Anyway keep up the good work these stories are cool.

So little so late. Better sooner than never. I shall persevere.

>>23664112366411

I was doing some stuff and didn't log in for the past few days, but when I did today: Jesus Christ that's a lot of comments- lol. But I love reading them

And that is what I call the ultimate april fools prank.

... well that happened.

I was going to ask how magic had survived for so long... but at about 50 left I guess it makes some sense. Except after X00 years how do you still go about having the same offspring?

Bio bombs... Ew.

Ha nice troll

Anyway keep up the good work

You have very silent fans.

>>24055872405587

Or the more likely explanation, there aren't any in the first place

>>24089022408902 Well I'm here aren't I? What am I? Chopped liver?

>>24089352408935

Well, you know

>>24097242409724 no, I don't know. Do I just not count?

>>24103222410322

Aren't you just like a reader

>>24115082411508 a reader can't be a fan? Can a fan not be a reader? Would a reader go through all those chapters if they didn't like it?... I think I might have forgotten to favorite.

>>24115172411517

Good point

I have finally caught up with this awesome story. Thanks for writing this hyper-cool(I am out of superlatives ) story. Just one complaint - I am missing that "bounty huter" feeling (and theme) of the first book.

And I am out of things that I wanted to say - just keep up the good work, you have gained one faithful reader.

>>25060642506064

Thanks! And yeah... It did kind of lose that feeling a while ago-.-   But don't worry, I have a general idea of what the next story arc is going to be like- and that should bring everything right back. Although... That's gonna be quite a long way away...

>>25072592507259

Long way away does not matter, I am really interested in this story. Just keep up the good work ... I am really hooked to this story ... so ... just ... like .. go on and it will work out   .. I am really  looking forward for next chapters ;)

Your faithful reader, Leo.

New chapter is as awesome as always, thanks for this übercool (is that even word? well, in central europe it is and it means "(much)more than cool") story.

And for the chapter itself - I have wished for a bit more gadgety-talk, but otherwise good chapter.

Your faithful reader, Leo.

>>25237972523797

I'm afraid to announce that you'll have to sit through RD's speech next chapter then-_- but I'll try make it exciting. Sh*t hits the fan straight after that, so yeah last little bit

U know what... this seems like a really awesome story... but waaaaaaaaaaaaay to many words... : / I'm not strong enough to read this

>>25514912551491

Trust me, it is worth every second of reading, the first chapter is always hardest, then, it will just ... whats the word ... hook you in.

New chapter, simply, AWESOME. Exactly what i like in fanfiction - action, development and funny comment at the end, simply perfect.

Just one thing - saying "sixty miles an hour" and a few sentences later "two meters" is just strange ...  choose one system (preferably metric) and stick to it.

>>25544352554435

Well there's something I'll need to watch out on