The grammar needs improvement, but it seems really sweet and I would love to see where this does.

Even though I love this ship to death, I just can't find it in me to like this story. It's lacking in detail and descriptions, has many uncapitalized proper nouns and other grammatical errors. Many scenes lack in detail. The scene with Comet Tail and Goldengrape, for example, needs to be explained further. Like, how did they meet? or how did they come to hate each other so? So, yeah I'm a bit disappointed.

Interesting likeing this alot please do more

>>15262961526296 the goldengrape comet tail feud is going to be explained in a further chapter

I like this storyitsvery smooth but alot of your "I"'s are lower cased insted of upper cased

Keep up the story please.

>>15262961526296 throughout the story I will hint at the reasons for their feud, eventually leading to an entire chapter dedicated to the origins of their feud

I enjoyed this chapter

Me gusta

DUN DUN DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUN!!! Comet is the coltfriend Twilight had.

I am kinda interested in this story.

I love it but fasster updates would be nice.

Goldengrape you B@*$&^

YAY! But faster updates.

The plot thickens. And I guess romance...is in the air... I like how this and your CaramelXApplejack story are connected. I sense that its no coincidence that this meteor shower is happening at the same time as The Apple Family Harvest Party. Also Goledgrape is a d*&( Beating up Spike and trying to steal Twilight from Comet...that's beyond evil that's a total douchebag. I am excited see how all this drama resolves, see you in Brighter Days.

Do it...

S*&@$^ just got real

bro fist to spike

THE ADVERTURE IS BIGGER AND JUSICER

Yes because every one has spy suits i loved the chapter

What a Sweet Chapter that made DAWWWWW.

BUT no time for that,we need this guy help.

LET THE FUN CONT.

Finally a new chapter

I really need to continue my playthrough of the Assassins Creed series. Good chapter. Always wanted to break into the houses of an enemy.

A STORY FOOL ME 2 TIMES AND I FELL FOR IT......

Image: http://cdn.derpiboo.ru/media/BAhbBlsHOgZmSSJBMjAxMi8wOS8wNy8xNF80N18xNF81MzhfOTE5NjVfX1VOT1BUX19zYWZlX3ByaW5jZXNzX2NlbGVzdGlhBjoGRVQ/91965__safe_princess-celestia_parody_phoenix-wright_artist-dethlunchies_objection.jpg.jpg

That character is an OC, not an 'Other'

Fix it

I read your CaraJack story before this, and one thing I have to say is that in happy you have a bit of SoarinDash

Spike to the rescue

That was an amazing story! I hope there is a sequel

I love how you put a Assassin's Creed 3 reference in there.

Since I haven't read it yet: Does Comet Tail have his "country" accent from Super Speedy Cider Squeezy?

Radical

omg best story ever

\:) ya did good son real good maybe even the best.

>>20653942065394 He's actually doing something good/likable... I'm calling OOC.

This is like a unofficial sequel to the Holding Hooves story good job on it a few grammar mistakes, but is still good.

As the ones above me DUNDUNDUNDUNDUNDUNDUNDUNDUNDUN