Pinkie Pie wouldn't trade her best friend for anypony in Equestria. She's super duper fast, absolutely awesome, super supportive and the loyalest pony this side of the fourth wall. She can often be a little overprotective, but she never goes overboard with it.
There's only one teeny tiny problem Pinkie has with her. Well it might be a little-wittle bit bigger then teeny tiny. In fact, it's quite big. It's actually what she is, well, maybe one of the biggest whores the pink mare has ever met.
(RainbowPie - PinkieDash - DashiePie or whatever else you wanna call it fic!)
Image belongs to Jack-a-Lynn on deviantART.
Chapters (3)
This is my second attempt at a Rainbow Dash x Pinkie Pie. I'm hoping this will be quite a bit longer then that, and much more humorous (hopefully). I have also tried adding some more mature themes, though I highly doubt I will ever do a clop.
Constructive Criticism is welcome as is pointing out any grammar mistakes!
Thanks for reading and I hoped you enjoyed it,
~Eletricka
1669750
I haven't read it yet, and I don't think I will until there are more chapters. I just can't stand suspense!
Didn't expect that!
When I read the description, I was deeply surprised.
"It's actually what she is," I was expecting it to say that the problem was Rainbow Dash being a pegasus.
", well, maybe one of the biggest whores the pink mare has ever met." !!!
25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_mdclliDENv1r64zjfo1_400.gif
>"Hi there! Please could you be my pre-reader?"
>???
>Profit.
I can definitely see this going somewhere good
And I don't just mean the ending. You seem to be an excellent writer and I really hope I'll be seeing more of your fics
But finish this one first though! I want to see what you come up with.
Also, for that constructive criticism you wanted, You could really implement other characters for longer than that. If Rarity, Applejack or Cloud kicker won't show up in the story later, there really was no need for them to appear now. +
"bothstill" isn't English. But then again, you did mention you didn't have a proofreader.
Otherwise the story was amazing. You have some great humor, you can describe what's happening very well and you seem to have an amazing imagination. Keep it up!
This definitely seems like a story I would follow. The characters don't fall out of their personalities - Rainbow Dash is brash and slightly cocky, Rarity is classy, Pinkie Pie is...well...being Pinkie. Besides a few grammatical errors here and there (or typos, it's hard to tell), the story carries an original plot that starts with a great beginning. Pinkie hasn't even started to express her feelings towards Rainbow yet.
What also adds to the story is how Pinkie will (hopefully) confess to Rainbow, and whether or not Rainbow will break out of the 'one-night stand' psychology and accept Pinkie's feelings towards her. It gets a little boring when a story like this is posted:
>Two ponies have feelings towards one another (the reader is well aware of this)
>They are too afraid to confess to the other
>Will Pony A accept feelings from Pony B if they both have feelings for one another? (I don't know, maybe? Is this supposed to be some sort of undeveloped plot?)
>Confession eventually happens after some event
>Everyone's happy with each other and there is no conflict or resolution whatsoever.
Now this, young fillies, is just flat-out boring.
But you, Electricka, and this story, are an exception. If you can pull this off, this fic should get a good amount of thumbs and a lot of views and comments – keep on writing!
~Neologic
I had my doubts when juding by the header text, but this was so far briliant
Well done! Keep those chapters rollin'!
Silver out!
Ah'm gonna follow this 'ere story. Keep it goin'!
Uh, 2 problems right off the bat.
1: The term is "slut". A slut is a promiscuous person. A whore is someone who trades sex for favour, whether that be money or something else.
2: It's spelled "prologue" not "prolouge".
On a personal note, I just can't grasp this characterization. I mean Pinkie is the "party pony" while Dash seems kind of socially independant, more into her own thing. I mean anything's possible, it just seems more of a stretch based on their characters.
1674206
I've meet lots of tomboy sluts... it's like how most males seems themselves as socially independent and more into their own thing and most of them are sluts/horndogs, no?
You seem a little "ignorant" on the subject.
In the description, fourth is spelled forth. Might want to patch that up.
1674206
http://www.fimfiction.net/story/6868/The-Party-Hasn't-Ended
A PinkieDash pairing is possible.
1674388
Well someone's smug, aren't they?
I suppose I am ignorant of what It's like to be a tomboy and/or a slut. I'll defer to your experience in those subjects.
1674613
I... don't think I ever said it wasn't...
1674662
Oh...I thought that was what you meant when you mentioned the 'characterization stretch'. My apologies, then.
1674662 Just being honest. You don't like it? Well, you can always live under a rock... I mean... if you don't already do, that is...
1674695
Nah. Not commenting on the shipping, that's so automatically OOC that I disregard it's OOCness automatically.
More just that Pinkie seems more intuitively a party girl than Dashie.
1674779
What you have "honestly" is an anecdotal opinion, not "truth".
My opinion is that while Pinkie is a partier, Dash doesn't exactly seem like much of.a social butterfly. I wasn't even referring to her being a tomboy and I'm not sure why you jumped to that conclusion.
Are you even capable of discussing your position on the matter without spouting insults? There is a flaming report feature now, you know.
Hm... I think I'll be tracking this one. You definitely need a pre-reader/editor though. I can see several mistakes throughout this chapter. If you like, I could extend my own services; I'm experienced with editing, and I have plenty of free time.
inb4 Regidar
Anyway, sweet fic, you really need a PR though. I'm not that experienced, so ask somepony else. Otherwise it's pretty good!
1674848 Cute. And how very noble of you with idle threats, great signs of maturity... or is it immaturity?
1673850
I can't stop laughing at that picture, thanks for making my day!
1681260 No problem, I have a library full of 'em! So, how's the story going then?
1681268
Keep them coming!
And the story's doing pretty well, thanks.
Oh, and because of that picture, i'm gonna have to put "boy, that escalated quickly" In there, because it just fits perfectly.
Oh, sweet Celestia, I shouldn't of had so much coffee.
And (I hope this doesn't make me sound rude) I've been told by many people that "Whore" and "Slut" are interchangeable words and I really didn't want to upset anybody over this. Sorry?
1681296 Coffee? Coffee?
i.neoseeker.com/mgv/60953-Shadow%20of%20Death/953/98/132642356564_display.png
A true human being drinks tea!
1681306
First: Awesome picture, again.
Second: I'm not sure I am a human being at this moment in time, especially with Derpy looking at me like that.
1681327 If I awoke to seeing that, I'd phase out of this universe. Screw physics as we know it, I'd want the get the hell away from it.
I like this Rainbow, it suits her.
Loved the prologue, and I hope there'll be more to come in the future!
1681327
Helllooooooooooo? You still alive?
1704405
...I believe so...And the chapter shall be up either now or tomorrow! I don't know why it's taken so long, probably because I was too busy...doing something.
But I'm alive. I'm 20% sure of that!
1708179
i31.photobucket.com/albums/c392/Fezzelfoxie/PONIES/1290133874862.jpg
Here's chapter one! Yay!
Yeah, well, it took me a while to finished this because my like kind of went "afhjfgniveg" for a while and so I didn't really have time to write, and for any of you wondering if it's gonna be:
>Bet is made
>They start hanging out and develop feelings for each other
>Admit feelings and everypony lives happily ever after
Don't Worry! It is not one of those stories.
Anyway, hope you enjoyed reading it,
~Eletricka
Let the games begin
Really liking the story so far. Especially the way you've made the charecters is something to look forward to. I'm really liking the silently pissed off Pinkie and the slightly insecure RD. Also you apparently you can and will avoid the cliches that you stated in your comment above. Keep ut the great work! Also, can you tell me how long are you planning on making this fic?
1725955
I don't really know, it all depends on what type of inspiration I get, plus, I've got exams after Christmas so I won't be uploading much then...
But it should go on for a couple of months, maybe?
And thanks! Glad you're liking it!
Was that a Shark Tale referance?
anyway, would have liked it better if it was longer, but it's still freakin awesome!
This story has a lot of potiential. Although I am not sure why her friends have a problem with RD having mutual one night stands. It isn't really their buisness.
1737544
Yeah, can't get enough of that movie for some reason! And I will try to make the next chapter longer for you.
Glad you enjoyed it though!
Right, okay, I was hoping to have the next chapter up today...but couldn't because it's been hectic at my house and I've had no time to do anything, sorry!
Anyway, is anyone wanting me to change "whore" to "slut", because I hope I haven't annoyed or made anyone angry...1674206 And I really hope I didn't make you angry, but I will change if anybody would like me to.
And a reason I chose Dash as the "player" is because she's at the center of all the shipping charts I've come across. So she just seemed like the perfect choice!
"...she is, well, maybe one of the biggest whores the pink mare has ever met."
I knew as soon as I read that that this was going to be a cool fic!
Why was I emailed that this fic would be updated?
I hope you continue writing this story; I enjoy your writing and find the Pinkie and Rainbow shipping very cute.