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  • 78w, 5d
    New User Pic

    One of my favorite people in the world, Kartal, has made me a picture of me as a pony. She is the best. Go like her and stuff on her fimfiction account, and her deviantart.

    http://kartaltheartist.deviantart.com/

    http://www.fimfiction.net/user/KartalTheWriter

    0 comments · 46 views
  • 86w, 1d
    New Collab (And by new, I mean old as hell!)

    I totally forgot to mention it over here, but I have contributed to another collab. This one, to be exact. Go read the collab, and all the other ones, too.

    0 comments · 46 views
  • 104w, 9h
    Tumblr nonsense

    Well, I have a tumblr. I intend to try and use it more often, and since I like writing things, I'll link things not related to ponies over in it. I'll also write random things about my opinions and stuff like that. WOWZERS.

    You should go check it out.

    2 comments · 91 views
  • 105w, 2d
    Welp

    I have two stories I want to do, one almost finished and one pretty much just in my head.

    The first one, the one almost done, has to do with Time Turner and the fact that everyone seems to think he's some kind of time traveling weirdo.

    The other, is well, a way to indulge my love of the Roman Empire. it's pretty much a Roman legion being teleported into pre-Equestria Equestria, and trying to survive. I didn't realize it was something I wanted to do until I noticed I was spending loads of time looking at how Roman legions were formed and what they might do against things like Griffons and stuff.

    0 comments · 55 views
  • 106w, 2d
    Hmmm...

    Is it wrong I want to make a story just so I can use the pun Charlemane?

    2 comments · 48 views
  • ...
 28
 873
Source

Time Turner is one of Equestrias finest timepiece makers.

If only that was what ponies knew him for.

Instead, a rumor started by a certain party pony leads to trouble, as Turner becomes thought of as an adventuring time traveler. As you can imagine, Turner is not happy about this.

Cover art used with permission from sircinnamon.

First Published
22nd Oct 2012
Last Modified
23rd Oct 2012
#1 · 104w, 3d ago · · ·

The alliteration! Read Later for sure!

r14
#2 · 104w, 3d ago · · ·

great idea i read a bit but not done yet.

#3 · 104w, 3d ago · · ·

Very cute; I enjoyed it. I have a short list of little errors, nothing that really detracted from the story, but things that could stand to be patched up;

I mean, why would you not tell me about that when I threw you a ‘welcome to ponyville’ party.

Ponyville should be capitalized, and the sentence should end with a question mark.

Even though he had physically left Sugarcube Corner, Pinkie still talked about ‘Ponyvilles own Time Traveler’. for days on end

"Ponyville's" should have an apostrophe, demonstrating ownership, and there shouldn't be a period after "Traveler."

The Wall-eyed Pegasus

Wall and Pegasus shouldn't be capitalized. I feel your pain on this, I have a tendency to randomly capitalize words quite frequently.

“Ditzy Doo. But you can call me Derpy, a lot of people do?”

Should end with a period or ellipses, not a question mark.

I might have missed a couple things, but those were the errors that stood out to me.

#4 · 104w, 3d ago · · ·

Dat ending lolololol:rainbowdetermined2:

#5 · 104w, 3d ago · · ·

>>1482759

Thanks. I feel silly for missing these during my editing of it. And unfortunately, word kind of capitalized pegasus on it's own.

But yeah, I do have a tendency to capitalize words that don't need it and to forget to capitalize words that do.

Again, thanks for the help, and I'm glad you like it.

#6 · 104w, 3d ago · · ·

>>1482854

No problem, happy to help! My first fic would have been a mess if somebody didn't provide the same service for me!

Oh man, gotta love auto-correct. I always turn those off immediately after getting into any text-editing environment.

By the way, I really loved the way Derpy was characterized in this story, it felt just right.

#7 · 104w, 3d ago · · ·

>>1482909

Thanks. I don't mean to brag, but I kind of like how I did Derpy, too.

#8 · 104w, 3d ago · · ·

Oh my god, that ending. :rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh:

#9 · 104w, 3d ago · · ·

>>1483025>>1482851

I knew I'd get some laughs with that.

If you like this story, go check out The Album. I have a story posted in it, and there are a bunch of stories written by other awesome people, too.

#10 · 104w, 3d ago · · ·

>>1483067

Lol will do

#11 · 104w, 3d ago · · ·

The Doctor has locked his Time Lord self in the fob watch I say! He actually believes he is a pony because he is, he made himself that.:pinkiegasp:

Oh, and nice story.

#12 · 104w, 3d ago · · ·

>>1483298

Thanks, I'm glad you enjoyed it.

#13 · 104w, 3d ago · · ·

A very good  story, but a little too close to the story of sepia tock.

#14 · 104w, 3d ago · · ·

>>1483362

Hmm, I've never heard of that story. Guess I need to go looking. I'm glad you like my story, though. :twilightsmile:

#15 · 104w, 3d ago · · ·

>>1483413 if that's the case, you have an interesting read ahead.:pinkiehappy:

#16 · 104w, 2d ago · · ·

Magnifique!  I'm so glad I started watching doctor who because now things like this make sense to me!:yay:

Also I love how it was Derpy's idea to go along with being The Doctor.

#17 · 104w, 2d ago · · ·

A unique, light-hearted and rational look at Time Turner, and how attached we are to the idea of Dr. Whooves.

The secret ending was fun, and Colgate was a perfect choice. For some strange reason, we insist on thinking of her as Colgate, the dentist pony. Despite the fact that throughout the series, her cutie mark has always been identical to Time Turner's. Thematically, it fits in well with the rest of the story about how we become a bit too attached to the stories we make up about these ponies, and reminds us that they are probably quite different from what we expect.

Could be a good thing to start thinking about not getting too attached to fanon ideas about popular background ponies. Especially if the show creators  decide to bring them more into focus in future episodes (like they did a bit with Derpy).

#18 · 104w, 2d ago · · ·

That was a delightful read. Mr. Turner and Ditzy seemed very real and likable. You have my watch. :pinkiesmile:

On an editing note: Be careful with your narrative tenses. At a few points in the story, the narration slips into present tense as opposed to the literary past you maintain through the majority of the story. An example of this timey-wimey slip up, emphasis added:

Instantly, Turners rage dissipated, and a deep sense of guilt overtook it. “Oh my, I’m so sorry miss. I, I didn’t mean to get so angry. I…. I guess I thought you were someone else.” She doesn’t respond, and continues to weep on his stoop. Instinctively, he wraps his hooves around her in an attempt to try and calm her, and despite his previous demeanor, she just embraces him, her tears dripping all over his coat.

This actually marks the beginning of biggest passage where there is an issue. Nevertheless, this didn't detract from my sincere enjoyment of the story. Keep writing! :heart:

#19 · 104w, 2d ago · · ·

>>1490430

I do have that problem a lot, especially when I take long breaks away from writing like I did with this one. Thanks for pointing it out, I'll get to fixing it soon.

And I'm really glad you enjoyed my story.

#20 · 104w, 17h ago · · ·

Please let there be a sequel to this

#21 · 104w, 16h ago · · ·

>>1500094

I can't really think of a way for there to be a sequel to this. I do intend to write other stories, though, and being the silly guy I am I'll probably have any future stories be in the same "canon" as this one, if you will.

#22 · 103w, 4d ago · · ·

first I was like :rainbowderp:

then I was like :applejackconfused:

then I was like:trixieshiftright:

then I was like :scootangel: :moustache:

then I was like :facehoof::rainbowlaugh:

and I am never (maybe) doing that again

#23 · 103w, 4d ago · · ·

>>1519432

I assume this is a good series of events.

#24 · 103w, 4d ago · · ·

>>1520147

sorta kinda it averaged as good, ended good what would have been better is seeing a fob watch in a glass container in the back

#25 · 103w, 3d ago · · ·

>>1520821

That probably would have worked, too, but oh well.

#26 · 103w, 3d ago · · ·

>>1522540

sometimes I think I make a better editor than writer

#27 · 46w, 6d ago · · ·

Very sweet and fun. I love the message in this fic and how well you handle it. Definitely looking forward to more from you.:twilightsmile:

#28 · 4w, 5d ago · · ·

>>1500094 I agree. Even though I support the Colgate = Romana thing, Colgate does make for a nice Doctor.

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