• Member Since 19th Oct, 2012
  • offline last seen Apr 2nd, 2020

AmazingFailWriter


Comments ( 124 )
knighty
Site Owner

God damn I wanted to fail this piece of trash so badly.

knighty
Site Owner

In fact, I'm failing it.

1473601
Please do, I actually beg of you!
Do it for Apple Bloom!
mlkshk.com/r/26H

I had absolutely no idea of what to expect of this when I first saw it...

This couldn't be a worse concept if you turned PDP and Toby into your alicorn OCs.

AGAIN, I SEEM TO HAVE SET THE PRECEDENT THAT IT IS OK TO MAKE SHITTY YOUTUBER FICS

IT IS NOT

I blame myself for this shit.

Comment posted by BuckRogers deleted Dec 16th, 2015

If this was a video, I would send it to the retsupurae guys.

This was terrible. You should feel ashamed of yourself.

Comment posted by AmazingFailWriter deleted Jun 18th, 2014

Of course, PewDiePie won. Because clearly this wasn't enough of a failfic.

At least Toby is mildly entertaining, as opposed to that... THING.

...

No, I'm totally serious. If Tony had been the winner, I'd have given this story a thumbs-up.

I'm only reading this out of curiosity.

TWE EXPLORES, PLEASE! TEAR THIS TO SHREDS!

TEAR IT TO SHREDS AND THROW IT IN THE FALLOUT ZONE!

They're both overly-screaming meme-spurting caterin-to-preteen-girls faggots.

Problem solved

This shouldn't piss me off as much as it does. But it just... does.

\
Because this fic deserves more reaction videos.

I feel like this is coming from a normal troll on Youtube,thinking that all of the big commentators(Pewdie,Toby,Nova,etc),if they met in real life,would beat eachothers asses.There is no competition here.They have said that themselves multiple times :facehoof::facehoof::facehoof::facehoof::facehoof: out of :facehoof::facehoof::facehoof::facehoof::facehoof: and :pinkiehappy::pinkiesick::pinkiesick::pinkiesick::pinkiesick:

I've read some horrible stories before, and while I'm not saying I'm a great writer, nor do I want to be mean here, but This physically hurt to read. It gave me a headache because it boggles my mind how a person could write anything so atrocious and then post it on a website for all to see and critique. So my question to you, Sir, is this: :fluttercry: why would you write this?

:pinkiesick::pinkiesick::pinkiesick::pinkiesick::pinkiesick::pinkiesick::pinkiesick::pinkiesick::pinkiesick::pinkiesick: thats all I have to say.

What the fuck did I just read?
(No offense, but) A piece of trash!

1517363 *Leaps off train*

I'm not able to put in in anyfolders, but that doesn't mean I can't tear it a new one.

Back in a few.

twow443, TWE's Knight in Training

meta.filesmelt.com/downloader.php?file=AVGN.gif
Why should I even try?
Why is his name so relevant?

1517447 GODSPEED, GOOD SIR

Well... at least your handle is accurate.

1473598 It honestly couldn't have been the worst thing you've read right? I'm kind of surprised that you of all people- *reads the story*

......you deserve a purple heart.

I for one found it hilarious. It was pointless and should not be repeated, but it knew exactly what it was and was happy with it. This seems to me to be a piece that is just fun to hate, although I do agree with everyone in begging you to please stahp.

And I thought my stories were bad

As much as I hate to clog up a comment section, there's just no other good response.
media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m9senkeJmE1qmj74b.gif

1473598
Wow... the great admin himself hates this...
*Opens story*
I can see why.

Dude, I love Pewdiepie, but I feel this could have been better. And by could I mean should. Try a bit harder next time. Some people just don't have the ability to write, and some stories are complete flukes. Don't feel too bad, though, you'll find your place in these fandoms eventually.:coolphoto:

Uhhhh, yeah. Someone tell me what the hell I just read! Please?

No matter, it's time to review it. This will be in my sort of traditional review.

So let's begin.

"Alright, bitches, you know what to do." General PewDiePie said as he marched along the lines of the bro army, holding Stephano slightly out in front of him. "Troll Tobuscus' BARREL! account and videos."

Question for you, Is this supposed to be a serious story? Do you plan on adding more and more? Then you need some backstory. As of NOW. Why are they fighting, and what are they fighting about? Most people will judge a story on the VERY FIRST paragraph. You want to draw people in, make them want to read your story and know more about it, not push them away. And I'll tell you the truth, I almost just abandoned this review just from reading that. Not good.

In the Bro Army Land.
The Bro Army readied their battle gear, consisting of PewDiePie T-shirts and stephano statues.
“Today, we kill TOBY!” PewDiePie screamed as he charged towards TobyVille. The Bro Army followed him close by as they charged down the street.
Suddenly, a big flash lit up the sky and PewDiePie and the Bro Army got pulled into a vortex of purpleness. They landed on the ground and stood up.
“Barrels did this!” General PewDiePie called out as he looked around. They were standing in the centre of Ponyville.

What? I lost my focus at this part. Where is this "Tobyville" located? Give us some details of what's around them! Then you randomly dropped them in Ponyville? Why? How exactly did they get there? Give us some details!

About 50 ponies were gathered around the Bro Army. A few seconds of awkward silence and a SECOND purple vortex appeared! The equally cool Audience fell through and Toby and his dog spotted PewDiePie and screamed, “It’s PewDiePie! Murder him and put him in a barrel!” The Audience stood up quickly and charged at the Bro Army.
Ponies began to scream and run in all directions. Twilight Sparkle galloped towards PewDiePie.
“What’s going on!?” She cried over the sound of desperate screams.
“BARRELS!” PewDiePie screamed back as he threw his Stephano statue into a section of The Audience.
“What are these barrels you appear to fear?” Twilight questioned as PewDiePie flung two fanboys into opposite direction.

Umm. No. They would try to figure out what just happened to them, not just start fighting again! Imagine if in the Revolutionary War, something like this happened to them. They would probably try to figure out where they were, doncha think?

I also highly doubt it that Twilight would instantly start talking to Pewdie. Humans just suddenly landed in a world filled with talking ponies. Remember, everything that lives in Equestria has NEVER seen a human. You need to incorporate that in everything you work on that has humans going to Equestria.

“Sir, I have gathered lots of help, but the Barrel King has done the same!” She cried.
“Well, we must kill the BARRELS!” PewDiePie shouted.
“Why do you always shout BARRELS and why do we have to kill them? Can’t we convert them?” Twilight asked.
“Because the BARRELS can never be changed and it sounds cool. Are you a spy for the BARREL King!?” PewDiePie asked, pulling a face.
She shook her head.
“Fine! Ponies! Attack!” he cried out, charging through Ponyville towards Toby.

:facehoof: Okay, we all know that he makes jokes about barrels. It got old in your story VERY fast. Pewdie is a rather smart human, meaning that he can use more words than just saying "barrel!" You're making him sound like an idiot.

Final result. D-
Truthfully, you were doomed from the start. The story make no sense, the chracters were unbelievible and you NEEDED a backstory.
Points for spacing your paragraphs and your capitalization.

Final advice: Re-write this, or scrap it. Truthfully, I don't think this has much potential to be liked.

From a brony just like you,
twow443, TWE's Knight in Training

No.... just no. I managed to get through the first paragraph before my brain started trying to escape out my ear. Only the liberal use of alcohol helped to keep it in my skull.

I can't do anything worse to this story than the author already has.
Was he going for funny, ironic or just plain trolling, I don't know and I don't care.

The sooner this story is destroyed, the better off humanity will be.

Haha this was just completely brilliant :rainbowlaugh:

Serously, next chapter: they better be back as Alicorn OCs! :rainbowkiss:

How can this go so many dislikes when it's such a stupid idea, that it's awesome! :rainbowlaugh:

I wondered how bad something would have to be for Knighty himself to hate it.

...

I just found out.

1.bp.blogspot.com/-05w8H94vXpw/UBVt3OydjfI/AAAAAAAADdM/3u8h20VN2Rg/s1600/tumblr_lf1z60iGD11qdu2tro1_400.png

1517644 Personaly, I'm surprised you didn't review it. Heck, you could have done it better then I did. :derpytongue2:

1473598 Hm, I've seen a large amount of dislikes here...I wonder if this story is really as bad as-

*Reads story*

...

i.imgur.com/M5OTZ.png

Scribblestick here. I've seen downthumb swarms before, but this... this is an infestation.

Let's figure out where it's coming from, shall we?

-Reads story

What... just what... I don't even... what...

I really have nothing to say. I don't know what's going on. I don't know where I am anymore. No context... no explanation... something about barrels...

I think I need to go restart my brain now.

Cheers.

I hate that tryhard PewDiePie. At least Toby is funny when he isn't being a tryhard, but it seems like everything PewDiePie does is forced. At least when Toby gets scared or suprised it's genuine.

1517696
But therein lies madness and I need to hold onto the last vestiges of my sanity as best I can. :trollestia:

I'm not going to lie, I am only a fan of Toby Turner. If your going to make a story like this you should confirm that both of them are in fact bronies. The idea was a bit cheesy, but it was worth a shot.

This is more retarded then that Fic call Prince Wallis. I mean look at the description "Contains one bad word" how fucking old are you shit. I going to give you some advice now listen carefully // GO DIE IN A HOLE AND STOP MAKING FIC\\ thank you for disturbing my night:twilightangry2::trollestia:

1517363 You called?


Time for my review (a long one this time). Well, for starters, you've taken the two most over rated lets-players on the internet and combined them. This alone can send me into a rant about how unfunny Pewdiepie and Toby are, but this is about the story, so I'll refrain.

I like both PewDiePie and Tobuscus. I loved writing this and I hope you can all enjoy it as much as I did.

You've ignited a powder keg in my mind, and it's only two sentences in. Begin the list!

1)

“Hello, The Audience.” The speaker boomed to life as Toby’s face appeared on the large screen of Tobyville. “Today, we dislike spam Pewdiepies videos for trolls and lols!”

"They can take our views, they can take our likes, but they can never take our mindless fanaticism for hyperactive-ass internet personalities!"

2)

Suddenly, a big flash lit up the sky and PewDiePie and the Bro Army got pulled into a vortex of purpleness. They landed on the ground and stood up.

It's like you didn't even try to create a reasonable explanation for the portal. Although, maybe you're a troll. In which case, I'm still going to criticize you.

3)

“He’s a barrel! We must stop him,” He replied, before pointing at an open gap in The Audiences’ defences. “10-12 year old fanboys, attack that area!”

Now I know for a fact you're a troll. But again, accurate criticism aho!

4)

“Well, I guess Rainbow Dash and I could help you and maybe we could get over ponies to help you.” Twilight said, turning to round up some over ponies to assist PewDiePie.

Okay, the ponies have just discovered the existence of humans. Not only that, but Twilight is way too logical to take sides in a war she knows nothing about. That's like if a bunch of ponies landed in Nazi Germany and sided with the Germans without knowing which side was fighting for what. It don't make no damn sense!

5)

Twilight trotted around Ponyville, gathering ponies, little did she know, Toby had already enlisted a pony to round up over ponies to help him.

What the HELL IS GOING ON?!?! There's a battle taking place, and they've been in Equestria for a total of two minutes, but Pewdiepie has already enlisted a regiment of ponies to his command? :facehoof: Fuck off.

6)

“For… PewDiePie!!!” Twilight yelled as she charged along side him.

"For a strange creature I just met mere minutes ago, but has a flamboyant enough voice to give me a false interpretation that he has an actual sense of humor!!!"

The rest of the story was so incomprehensible and shitty that I could barely read it. Even the great Knighty himself shat on your story. I can see it was a troll fic, but even then, it's a terrible attempt at one. And I just realized I've been ripping on Toby and Pewdiepie more than the story itself. But regardless, all 3 suck. Once again, I say: Fuck off.

~Inspectah Dash. TWE's most frequent user of the word "fuck".

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