Ladies and Gentlemen... The God Squad.

If you can't tell yet, this story is going to be in a similar vein as 'The Many Secret Origins of Scootaloo' but have its own style. There will be an actual narrative and story arcs but the characters (such as Cadence) are based on what happened in "Scootaloo'. I would say this story happened roughly 2 weeks after the events of 'The Many Origins'.

This chapter is a double size one but for the most part the chapters will be 2000 to 3000 words long with several chapters making up a story arc.

Think of this as if My Little Pony was created by  Adult Swim with a dash of Monty Python.

(Note: Yes, I will still work on the Amber Apple but I want to get back to comedy so I am going to alternate which stories I post as the days go on till Faith and Doubt is finished.)

How can you add Absurdism to Retro-Postmodern Deconstructionism?

Doesn't matter, I'll still read it.

Yes, YES!

In your head cannon where do the changelings live

Does Luna still think Twilight is her daughter?

>>14439351443935

That will be covered later on.

>>14440501444050

Yes, but that will be addressed later and won't be a major plotpoint for this story.

So, the Sisters and Tydal are off on a road-trip to Ponyville... via the Changeling Wastes, most likely by accident.  In fact, I'm going to make a prediction and bet that it will be Celestia who manages to divert them to the Wastes by some impossible mischance ("I'll teleport us to the Library... oops, no that should have been turnwise, not widdershins...").  Meanwhile, poor Shining is being dragged along as the group's Zeppo and, possibly, token sane stallion ("Hey, Chrys! Long time no see!" "'Bout time you turned up you worthless bit of male horseflesh! Finally come to live up to your responsibilities?" "Responsibilities?" "Foalcare payments for three-thousand!" "Hey, you mind-controlled me! You should have been the one to remember to use protection!").

Oh, Luna? The reason that Twilight gets to have all the fun adventures and you only get to be in three or four episodes (and the last time only as a one-line extra) is because she is the main character.  She even gets to sing the theme tune! So, until you've got a show whose theme tune you get to sing, this is just the way things have to be.

Now I want to hear Tabitha St. Germain (Luna's VA) singing "The God Squad".

I'm also wondering if Wall Breaker IV is a member of the Pie family?

Well.  Looks like my brain is going to be melted due to this awesomness.  Lemme get my cider.  Thanks for the fic!

I didn't think it needed a sequel but oh we'll why not watch the strangest family in Equestria go on an adventure

>>14446311444631

It is a spiritual sequel/Spinoff. It takes things set up in "The Many Secret Origins" but it follows its own path. No crack stories, no twilight searching for the truth... instead it will be a road trip comedy about what happens when gods decide to explore Equestria.

>>14446421444642 will their be any weird Family Drama like in Origins??? Cant Twilight tag along? Shed probably go insane half way through their journey thought   on second thought best not take her

Oh buck! A nymphomanic, a bored teenager, a stickler, a warmonger, and one normal out of the whole lot? This is gonna be real good.

Oh. My. God. Let the good times roll. Wait, which one is the straight man? They all seem crazy.

Cannot read now, shall do so LATER!

>>14388931438893

A hilarity filled road trip to kill the Changeling Queen?

Image: http://i.imgur.com/Hl2N2.gif

By the way, do you imagine someone's voice when you're writing Tydal's lines? If yes, then who? Just out of curiosity.

This sounds like fun, the powerful yet crazy god family of Equestria out on a road trip.

>>14459701445970

Optimus prime

>>14459701445970

Some have said they hear Gandalf the Gray, and originally it was Leonidas from 300... now I see it as a mix of the two: the old wisdom of Gandalf and the fury of Leonidas.

Ah yes, Wall Breaker the Fourth. A good way of adding more strangeness to an already funny fic.

Also, the title is "Broken Pilot"? Well, it is the "pilot" episode, and eh, logic is broken. I like this.

>>14469501446950

Interesting. But this is also kind of awkward for me because I've been imagining Tydal with the Old Spice Guy's voice.

>>14473721447372

Broken Pilot is also a VERY inside joke: a local band in the town I grew up in had that as their name.

For those that are interested, here is a bit of info about Tydal's kingdom: Lord Tydal is King of the Capricorns, who makes their home on the shores of Equestria and rule the Mareatine (the great western ocean) from Tydal's Keep, a massive fortress/castle that borders Equestria's western shores near the Smokey Mountains. The Mareatine stretches very far across the world and Tydal is master of several islands: Luna's Landing, Celestia's Refuge, Coral's Keep (a replica of Tydal's Keep but made of pink coral), and Misty's Fortress (a fog-covered island and home to The Great Games, Misty's tournament of warriors). Since capricorns are aquatic and can breath both air and water, all their cities save  the islands are found below the waves. The original capital of the Mareatine was Merida's Palace (named after Tydal's wife, the immortal capricorn queen Merida, goddess of the sea floor) but Tydal made his home in Tydal's Keep when Celestia and Luna were sent to live with him.

Before he was returned to live after coming down with a bad case of 'turned to stone', the Mareatine was very dangerous to sail. Now that the God of the Sea has returned, the ocean is passable... but only to those that have Tydal's favor.

Also, a bit about the family tree of The God Squad:

All the divine beings, including Discord, Tydal, Celestia, Luna, and Cadence come from the same mother (aka The Creator of Tau Sunflare). Blueblood is Celestia's adopted nephew (long story that will be explained soon) and Cadence is of course married to Shining Armor. Twilight Sparkle may or may not be Luna and Discord's lovechild... the jury is still out.

Tydal is married to Queen Merida, who came from another world and was turned into a capricorn and made the goddess of the sea floor. They have two children: Coral, the Pinkie Pie of the capricorn race and Tydal's heir in magic, and Coral's twin sister Misty, Tydal's heir in battle and war.

Finally, for those wondering timeline wise, this story will take place between the events of Season 2 and 3.

“All the stallions in my family since my great grandfather have been named Wall Breaker, Princess. I am the 4th Wall Breaker.”

Loving the story so far though, you actually had me laughing quite a bit, especially with nympho Cadence at the end!

“-and then they made me their chief.” Celestia blinked, tilting her head.

Haha! Funny Pirates of the carribean reference.

“Are we getting cupcakes?!” Cadence squealed, popping up behind Shining Armor (she had been taking Interdimensional Teleportation classes from Pinkie Pie for the last 4 weeks).

“Yes, would you like to come?” Celestia said.

“Oh would I!” Cadence giggled, clapping her hooves together. “I love cupcakes…”

“You do know that cupcakes is not a sexual act, right?” Luna asked. “We are talking about the pastry.”

“Oh…” Cadence frowned before perking up. “Can I use them during sex?”

"Yeah! You can set them on your puss!y(no-no word Lol) and make Shining eat off of it." Luna said a playful tone in her voice.

"I have to try that!" Cadence said.

"Luna! You've ruined me!" Shining screamed, horrified.

Where the conversation could have gone, had Luna been more playful.

This needs a second comedy tag.

ROFLOL

This chapter really gets things going and lets you see how the characters are going to be. The silliness, the insanity, the fast banter and the mocking... the characters are being developed.

Poor Wet Blanket. He's going to take so much abuse over the course of this story.

This will be really funny/awkward when Twilight recognizes them, but no one believes her when she tries to tell the others.

Poor Shining and Twilight, one of the few sane ponies left (though the stretching thing may prove that Shining is losing his grip on sanity as well)

>>14557651455765

To a crazy man we are all insane.

Okay, firstly, I'm adopting Night Dancer, Sunny Skies and maybe even Hot Lovin' as the alicorns' "Civilian Secret Identities" in all my under-development MLP stories as of now. I can see Cadance explaining it to a face-hoofing Twilight in a semi-serious or even entirely serious story already! Thanks for that, brother!

Secondly, as parodies go, this is a rib-tickler.  I especially appreciate poor Shining Armour's fate to be sanity in a world of the insane.  If only he bothered to talk to Tidal, he'd realise that he's sane too (at least as sane as a guy who fathered Princess Coral and then spent several years involved in her upbringing can be).  Luna...? Well, how sane would you be after having had your consciousness merged with a multi-quadrillion tonne lump of inert silicates for a millennia? She's allowed to be... er... eccentric.

I love how Lois Lane couldn't see past the glasses.  No matter what the universe, the glasses work... and she is the least perceptive person or pony ever to have lived.

Let the madness continue, enjoyed the interaction of Plotdump with the cast especially Tydal.

Ho ho!  Is this a little jab at those 'Luna goes for revenge against the Changelings and ends up broken because they have special mind powers they obviously forgot they had during the invasion and she's wayyyy to weak-willed and helpless to stop Chrysalis from deceiving/controlling her mind' stories that I hate so much because they make as much sense as Dragon Ball GT?  

>>14558051455805

I didn't even realize such stories existed. This is more mocking the fact that she is hardly featured, so Luna is now getting her own 'show' and cast of characters.

Hot Loving and Night Dancer need to be shipped now!  >.>;;;; Ummm nvm,  Dude I am smiling so big here at work.  Thank you for this.  I am surprised you didn't go for "I'm from Jersey" stichk for "Steve" but Detroit works too.

that was... okay...

>>14558201455820

Since I live very close to Detroit I like to use Detrot as my 'referenced' city for whenever I need to mention a town.

Detrot is of course famous for their Pegasi hockey team, the Red Wings (which had a game called off due to orgy thanks to Cadence) and are the number one maker of wagons.

The question here is if Shining acknowledges his castrated status, or if he's not and everyone simply thinks he is... (including his wife).

I've been waiting for this since you mentioned it during "The Many Origins of Scootaloo" and so far it has been worth the wait.  You're off to an excellent start!  

>>14559251455925

The better question is if anyone realizes what castrated means.

>>14559461455946 - Well... the same phrase can be used to describe both states.

>>14556511455651 OI! You stole my name

>>14558811455881

Well now that makes sense.  Of course having Hot Loving going to any type of physical sport is bound to result in an orgy.  Mental note to take Cadence to a professional wrestling event.  Watch as hillarity ensues.

>>14558111455811  Yeah, such stories exist.  And they always give the changelings excessive psychic mind-control powers and far greater intelligence than they ever showed in the episodes (such as twisting the mind of the Princesses to her will, toying with their thoughts, playing psychological and philosophical mind games)... and then totally ignore the rather obvious fact that THEY LOST in the episodes, never explaing how or why, with such overwhelming advantages, Chrysalis acted like an idiot repeatedly.

Basically, any author giving the Changelings that much mental power both magically and intellectually, needs to completely retcon the episodes because it's inconceivable that the Changelings would have lost the first time around in that case.

Not to mention that were the Changelings that great a threat and somehow the ponies still managed to stop them, the Princesses would have IMMEDIATELY followed the repulsion with a devastating attack to finish them off.  I don't believe they would even accept surrender.  Would you believe the word of a shapeshifter who can screw with your thoughts and perceptions of reality?  NO!  Of course not!  No creature with half a brain would (except maybe PETA members, but they only have 1/3 of a brain... )  

Anyway, the point is that those stories ALWAYS without exception so far that I have read invariably end up ignoring simple logical arguments or making the Changelings overpowered and hyper-intelligent while dumbing down the ponies severely and making both Celestia and Luna little more than weak-willed infants.

It's a completely unjustified mismatch all for the sake of making an emo story involving Luna being mentally raped... often repeatedly... and being too stupid to take advantage of the logical and hypocritical flaws in Chrysalis' attempts at subvertive pseudophilosophy.

>>14564311456431

Huh... well that will make what is going to happen when the cast gets to finally face the Changelings all the more funny.

>>14564511456451  Will Chrysalis be like, "Ok, what if we promise to make draining your love feel like a 6-month, never-ending orgasm."

Dash wingboner's instantly, "SIGN ME UP!!!"  

I lost it at Wall Breaker's brief re-appearance.

Wait, no... I lost it at the beginning.

I have no regrets about reading this!

Sunny Skies, eh? Is that a reference to Sunny Skies All Day Long (Which also involves Celestia and the name Sunny Skies, for those who don't know)?

Oh gods... this is going to be good. Tho we need to watch out. for Wall Breaker the 4th...if he an Pinke Pie were to talk to each other it could be....EPIC!!!

>>14624641462464

Yes. Nightdancer was originally Moondancer till I remembered there was already a Moondancer... but I actually like Nightdancer better.

Just finished the first chapter and I am thoroughly entertained.

Fav'ed and Followed.

Selfless plug!: http://www.fimfiction.net/story/56820/My-Little-Claymare

Thunderlane does not understand what he's gotten himself into.

What does Rosebud believe? That Scootaloo is Ed Wood?

Meanwhile, in Tydal's meditation room, the statue of Discord is silent as always.  However, there seems to be a voice saying: "How ever did they win the war?"

I suggest that one of our 'heroes' 'phone Twilight and ask her to spot them some bits until the end of the week.  You'd be surprised how often the royals bummed stuff off of the Mane 6 (and even occasionally the Cutie Mark Crusaders) because they'd used up their royal stipend a few days early.  Luna actually still owes 2,000 bits to Rainbow Dash after everyone's favourite cyan speedster put up bail for Luna after the disaster of last Nightmare Night.  Celestia still has to return Fluttershy's copy of 'Animal Husbandry for the Handless' and we won't go into the number of public indecency fines that Twilight has paid on Cadence's behalf.

Part of the fun of The God Squad is how the five leads interact with each other. They obviously care about each other in some way or form but like all good families their are complex undertones. I wanted there to be glimpses of underlying issues, such as all of them realizing that Celestia 'decreeing' something is a VERY bad thing. I also enjoy taking characters that didn't get alot of development in the show and giving them more depth. For example, I love the idea that Cadence has a gambling problem.

And, of course, there is the insanity that is Equestria.

You wrote the Many Secret Origins of Scootaloo? Well, damn... this might turn out to be quite fun then (ignoring the out of place MS quality oc pony in that lot ^^;) I'll give this a shot!

I here by am asking if I may borrow 4th Wall Breaker in any D&D game I run.  It will be just perfect.

Thunderlane, noooooooo!

/mourns Thunderlane

Good chapter, but really a cage made from bread dough and Mrs. Cake sounding like she is trying to extract money from them. Oh well Equestria and its residents are insane.

>>14679631467963

Go right ahead.

>>14678671467867

Not sure what you mean and don't really care. Tydal is used because I wanted another male figure to interact with Shining and I wanted a character with a short fuse and a violent streak.

Those guards are the best guards ever!

And I just love it that cadance makes everything into a overkilled sexual innuendo

>>14682121468212 Well, not caring and all, I was stating that the portrait of said OC clashed in the picture. Not talking about what he'll be doing in a story so don't take it as a "OC MS PONY NO BELONG IN STORY " and more of my nit-picky fashionista side wishing for a better mesh of colors among the portraits. (you can even see the unsteady lines of the horns added to a pony creator pony, just saying)

Apologies if flanks were hurt in my last comment

Oh dear Celestia, I do love this! Of course, I do hope it doesn't take away from the few Many Secret Origins of Scootaloo chapters left.

>>14683001468300

Ah. No problems then. Yes, that is an older picture of Tydal... when I update the image later on, there will be a cleaner version with the entire cast together.

For those interested, here is what Tydal looks like (after one can only assume a complaint made by Shining Armor):

Image: http://i36.photobucket.com/albums/e26/defender2222/Tydal.jpg

A normal capricorn (non-royal) has stub horns, is smaller, they have no beards and their tails are shorter.

That is all.

>>14455461445546 Shining Armor if you ask me, Luna is impatient, Celestia takes too long to make decisions, Cadence is sex obessed, and Tydal has anger issues.

And of course this little "Road Trip" can only end in hillarity except for everyone involved.

>>14468681446868 Which Optimus Prime are we talking about, G1, Beast Wars, RiD, Armada, Energon, Cybertron, Animated, Prime, or Live Action?

Tydal and Shining being scared because they agreed on something and hug each other out of fear. And then Cadence joined in the hug. I guess this proves one thing: OCs are very huggable.

Say, do you think we'll see any of Wall Breaker IV in the comments?

>>14685431468543

Wall Breaker will appear throughout the story as I go back and see what is happening in Canterlot... since the rulers of Equestria are gone, others are going to fill the void...

*Brings Wall Breaker along.  He looks confused*  "Why am I here?"  *points to comment above* "Well what do they wish me to say?" *shurgs* "Very well then.  You, yes you whom asked for my input.  All I can say is with Blueblood trying to take over expect some rather odd...what?" *Murmuring* "Well why didn't you say so?" *More murmuring* "Fine fine."

((that is all I got))

>>14558811455881 I get tired of people bashing Detroit all the time, lots of big cities have problems you know but you never hear THEM complaining.

But I'm not going to not follow this just because of that.

As for the story I just want to know WTB (What The Buck) is a Sutra?

>>14686061468606

The Pony Sutra is a famous book in Equestria that teaches of the many different sexual positions two or more lovers can assume.

Prince Blueblood is in charge?! We're all doomed!

ARGH!

" Spike asked Innocent."

InnocentLY

Please, go through the story and look for little things like this! I'm not trying to be mean, I just freaking love this story and it needs a bit more polish to really shine!

First of God Squad is published already?

Image: http://dashie.mylittlefacewhen.com/media/f/img/mlfw352_8959%20-%20twilight_sparkle%20yes.png

Image: http://dashie.mylittlefacewhen.com/media/f/img/mlfw4877-19a.jpg

Too bad I have too many things I'm my plate right now, but I'm definitely going to eventually get to this.

Image: http://dashie.mylittlefacewhen.com/media/f/img/mlfw7655-13429595205781.jpg

Pinkie....Promise.

>>14685411468541

G1 optimus

>>14691561469156

And as I have told people in all my stories, just let me know and I will correct the tiny mistakes. Simple as that.

The part will that guard named Wall Breaker reminded me of this scene from Spaceballs.

Ok, so KingofSquirrelz created this story, A Red Maned, Black Coated Alicorn named Mary Sue has a Birthday. Depressing as hell. And because I am a redemptionist at heart, I, with his permission, have adopted Mary Sue the alicorn into God Squad canon as Tydal, Cadence, Luna and Celestia's baby sister. She will appear again and get a much happier ending than what she got in his stories.

That said... Tydal does not like OC bashing... one bit. And he is also the eldest member of the godly family not stuck in stone so it is his duty to protect his brothers and sisters... so if you insult him or an OC, don't have a chair nearby.

Next, I give you 'the king', Fakeo Lulamoon:

Image: http://i36.photobucket.com/albums/e26/defender2222/Fakeo.png

And finally... some stories are just fun to write... I am having a blast writing this story and hope you guys continue to comment.

A political debate?

Image: http://pawsru.org/fc/src/fc105583_AW%20SHIT..jpg

>>14792101479210 This is bad.

Wallbreaker?!?! i see what you did there. totally favoriting this.

I am going to using that technique a lot today

Also, I saw a "jus" in one of Shiny's lines.

Hurray for the shout out to Rolly Polly the Dalek that only wants to hug.

O'malley and tydal would be good friends

Mary Sue deserves all the love

Shining is still the bad luck Brian of the series

The logic behind ruling is pretty f**king hilarious

The simplicity of the ponies are unbearable

And I need to go eat at-

BANG

'why aren't you eating at sugar cube corner!

For gods sake how are here!

'pain express!'

Oh lord

'this lord won't save you'

This sounds absolutely ridiculous.

I think I'm going to love this.

This story is so Faust damned stupid I can't even see straight.

I want more.

^_^ Love it

Image: http://th02.deviantart.net/fs70/150/f/2011/277/6/6/derpy_approved_by_ambris-d4bv8qn.png

Great job i cant wait to see the debate

Fakeo Lulamoon? Trixies brother?

>>14796601479660

I was wondering how long it would take someone to get that.

Yes, Fakeo Lulamoon is Trixie's brother.

So I guess the Blueblood declaring himself in charge bit was just to fake us out

I know this is too late to review this chapter and it has already have three more chapters but... I do have a question: What would happen IF Wall Breaker IV starts dating Pinkie Pie... and when will this happen?

>>14440971444097

"Hey, Chrys! Long time no see!" "'Bout time you turned up you worthless bit of male horseflesh! Finally come to live up to your responsibilities?" "Responsibilities?" "Foalcare payments for three-thousand!" "Hey, you mind-controlled me! You should have been the one to remember to use protection!"

That was the single best joke I've ever seen that involved Chrysalis. You deserve a medal.

CUPCKAES

Also, the glasses as über-disguise reminds me of this story.

Please let Tydal murder him, it would save us time.

I imagine Plotdump sounds like this:

The Wall Breakers are actually the cousins of Pinkie Pie.