YAY!!!!!!!!  

Sweet Celestia this can NOT end well... Yay for Pinkamena!!!

*picks up fic*

Hello, this is Axôlú

*reads*

Oooh, sounds good,

*reads*

Yes, please continue...

*finishes*

Wait! Nonononono! Don't put me on hold!

-click-

Dangit! I really like this idea!

If you don't mind me noting a few quick fixes:

In your second sentence you say

They had no idea what the were going to be shown

Also, when ending quotes, put a comma after what they say in those phrases where there isn't a ! or ?

Ex:

"Hi Lyra," Bon Bon said.

not

"Hi Lyra" BonBon said

Anyway, I enjoyed your first chapter and I look forward to more! ^_^

Ave,

                              Axôlú

oh no

SOMETHING I WANNA READ, MOST DEFIANTLY

oooohhhh 0.0

Woo! Update! I was probably the first one to see this....then again...I do seem to be a bit stalk-ish at times. If there is more to this ( why the hay wouldn't there be? ) then I'll be on it faster than Pinkie to a pack of cupcakes...that's really fast. Also... "Shining Armor said as he -say- his reflection in the mirror," Is that supposed to be sees?

>>14368651436865 Yes, yes it is supposed to be sees

>>14368731436873 Ah...so I suppose suddenly the world is going to end because of it.

>>14368781436878 Possibly, thank goodness I have a "end of the world" proof computer

>>14368871436887 It depends...can it handle 0 divided by 0? pretttyyy suuree that no computer can escape a shift in the fabric of time it's self, causing a super nova wiping out the whole universe....

>>14369231436923 I got a magic protection plan on it, I'm fine

>>14368651436865  lol oh theres more and a foal.choco helps me write the stories *kiss*

>>14369311436931 I hope that kiss was for me

>>14369381436938  oh hun, you know it was

>>14368871436887 but are you "end of the world" proof as well? it would be morbid if you weren't... your computer would be lonely

>>14369411436941 Better safe than sorry

>>14369461436946 I will simply download myself into my computer, and continue working from there because science

>>14369501436950 But I have magic...uh...things that prevent that...thingy by doing things!

>>14370991437099 My magic is better since my girlfriend is a Unicorn and she loves the stories, so the barrier is unbreakable thanks to her desire to see them finished

Loving this so much. And loving your picture. And loving you

>>14371221437122 Lol thanks

You're welcome. Keep up the good work.

>>14371071437107 Well...uh...I...crap. -blows up, not wanting to believe the totally legit logic that has been said-

>>14371601437160 Crap, now I have to clean this place up *grabs a mop*

On a completely different note...my bed sheets smell liked a dog barfed on them...yuck.

>>14371711437171 That sucks

I blame my cat...any who...I should reeeallly throw away this blanket before I touch whatever's on it...or mabye put it in the washer...that sounds better than throwing them away.

>>14371831437183 Yeah that'd probably be a good idea

Oh dear...

Awaiting further releases.

Ok that's just plain creepy

Huh Shining Armour you are A dumbshit

Poor Pinkie And RD   oh well can't wait for more

NEED TO KNOW WHAT HAPPENS NEXT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Everything was good before guard DEAD. Seriously, i don't want 'pinkie kills pony ermahgerd so scary'  shit anymore. Enough cupcakes.

Holy crap..This is intense :) Pinkamena is best pony..

Ugghh, not to rush you...but I want mooorree...my tummy aches for more.

>>14415541441554 Maybe tonight. It's all up to the gf

Well...this has certainly earned the dark tag.

Can't wait to read more!

Omnonomnomnom...once agian! I'm some-what the first one to read it! I can't wait to see what happens next...hopefully Pinkie gets better...why would anypony poison Pinkie Pie?! ...Well...yes...she did rape and kill a guard...but...besides that! Who would do such a thing?!

>>14432481443248 oh she's not poisoned. wait 30 minutes and read the next chapter

>>14434031443403 Oh...well then! Don't worry everyone! Crisis averted! Get back to your homes! False alarm...!

YAY!!

"Your name doesn't fit you all *too well." Sorry...had to do it...anyways, loved the chapter! Also...holymotherofgodPinkiPieispregnant. Didn't expect that...no really..threw me off guard completely!

Muffin?

>>14435131443513 It threw you off guard? Eh, eh? Ah screw it

>>14435161443516 Pinkie Pie logic

>>14435281443528 Sorry, that just sounded like something Derpy would say. That aside, I'm loving this story. I'm hoping we get to see more of Pinkamena. We are, right?

>>14435621443562 Possibly, it's all up to my girlfriend, Pink Pearl, since I'm writing the story for her

>>14435631443563 Ah. Well then. I hope she considers the thought.

>>14435861443586 She probably will

>>14435941443594 Good to hear.