Took me long enough, but here are the new updates. Enjoy, or don't. It matters not to me.

Just kidding, you guys are great, mostly...

Anyways, here you go.

BTW, huge shout out to my editor, Synthrid, and his amazing ability to somehow turn the bumbling crap that I type sometimes into coherent storytelling. Thanks bro!

Huh. This isn't the greatest fic(way too many cliches for one thing), but it certainly doesn't deserve twice as many downvotes as upvotes. For good grammar and spelling, and perseverance, I award you +1 upvote.

>>17347121734712

Thanks for the fave and the vote. If I may ask though, what cliches have I made? I really don't know, I'm kinda just writing this as it comes to mind, so you'll have to set me straight on that one.

Thanks again though. I hope you're enjoying it.

>>17348291734829

Well, rather unfortunately, your story is built on a series of these:

1: Human in Equestria.

2: Human in Equestria that also happens to be a soldier.

3: Said human is found by Applejack.

There are a surprising number of stories where ALL of these happen. Most of the time though, the grammar and spelling are quite inferior, which is where yours shines above the rest.

Here is what tends to drive these:

HiE: There is (almost) always an underlying bit of escapism here. No matter what human is being put in Equestria, the author is probably imagining it through his/her eyes. Besides this, humans like other humans. It feeds our ego as a species to imagine us going places never gone before.

SiE: There is a particularly pleasing dichotomy achieved by placing a blooded soldier in Equestria. Soldiers tend to represent all that is wrong and right with humanity- they are considered honorable, and yet they kill on orders. Black, white, and gray, they appeal as much as an example of humanities general moral relativism as they do with the simple "cool factor".

Found by Applejack: Applejack is an appealing character given her level-headedness, and thus makes an ideal target for a first contact because her actions are quite predictable in a crisis.

At any rate, in order to truly rise above being saddled with all three of these cliches, a story needs to be extraordinary, and your story doesn't jump over that bar yet.

>>17350001735000

Just wait for it. Sometimes to be extraordinary, we need to cock the hammer back on our story plots first. It will take awhile, but it does get better, and it will be epic.

Thanks for the explanation by the way.

Make more soon before i deploy! Ive been following this since you started it and i love it!