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148w, 2dMy first fan fiction... EVER!1 comments · 76 views
So I decided to join the people on here. I have had enough with freakin' ponychan, those people are mean. Anyway, I got reviews, revisions, and I did all the edits for the story after getting those reviews. And I refuse to go back to ponychan for any more reviews. The story is called: Spike's First Kiss. I am not really a writer, this was just an idea that came into my head, and I thought it would make a nice story that some people might enjoy. I hope you people enjoy it.
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Spike’s First Kiss
By: Dan Gaertner
Twilight knows I have a crush on Rarity, and she has known it about it for quite some time. Then, one day, I wanted to finally let Rarity know how I really felt about her. The problem was, I was very nervous. Every time I try to tell her, I always end up running off or changing the subject because I am afraid of how she will react. What if she doesn’t take a liking to me? So I talked to Twilight to see how I could do this right.
“Twilight, can I ask you about something?” I asked.
“Hey Spike, what do need?” She asked.
“You know that I have a crush on somepony around here, right?”
“Well, of course, I’ve known about it ever since you met her.”
“Yes, well…” I was too nervous to even tell her about what I wanted to do.
“What is it?”
I tried to hide my face from her. My cheeks were blushing just from thinking about Rarity.
“I really… uh.”
“What ever it is, I’m sure I can help.”
“I want to tell Rarity about how I really feel about her.” I sighed after speaking. But Twilight just stood their looking at me as if nothing is wrong.
“Oh, is that all? Spike, all you have to do is just tell her. I’m sure she’ll understand how you feel about her.”
“But I’m so nervous!”
I paused for a moment. Then I walked over to my chair near the fireplace and sat down. Twilight came up next to me and nudged my shoulder.
“Come on Spike,” she said, “What could possibly go wrong?”
“What could go wrong? What if she doesn’t like me back?”
“Oh Spike, you’re making such a fuss about this, everything will be fine.”
“Easy for you to say, it’s not like you have a crush on somepony you really like.”
“That’s not the point, I’m sure Rarity would be flattered by your feelings for her.”
“Flattered? I want her to like me, I have an undying love for her.”
“Well how do you want to tell her?”
I thought for a moment, I was always a little nervous about actually telling Rarity I was in love with her.
Then Twilight looked at me, “Are you really that afraid to tell her directly how you feel?” She asked.
I paused for another moment, and yelled, “YES!”
“Well, how about a gift for her? The holidays are coming up.”
“Hey, that’s right.”
I stood up and jumped around in excitement.
“Yeah, you could get Rarity a gift for Hearth’s Warming Eve.”
“That’s perfect! One question: What do I get her?”
“That should be easy, you should know a lot about what she likes.”
“Maybe, but I’m not sure what she likes the most.”
I quickly ran over to a table and got out a quill. I started writing down a list of things that Rarity would like. And I know that Rarity likes lots of things. So I sat there and thought to myself, What would Rarity like for a gift?
Twilight looked at me, “Well I see you have a lot of work to do, I’ll leave you alone for now,” she said. Then she left the room.
I stayed up all night writing down things that Rarity would like, until I passed out and fell asleep.
In the morning I was woken up by an unexpected voice.
“Wake up sleepy head.”
I shot up as soon as I heard the voice.
“Fluttershy, what are you doing here?”
“Twilight said she needed some help cleaning up her house, so I thought I would stop by and help.”
I looked over at Twilight. She was dusting off some of her books. “Thanks for coming over to help Fluttershy.”
I got up and stretched out my arms and legs. Then I thought to myself, Maybe I can find a gift for Rarity if I go shopping. “Well, I’m gonna go into town, to do some shopping for the holidays. Seeya.”
I stopped outside the door when I heard Fluttershy start to talk. I tried to not let them notice I was still there.
“Spike… going shopping?” Fluttershy asked.
“He’s trying to get a gift for somepony he likes.”
“Who is it?”
“Well, if you really want to know, Spike has a crush on Rarity.”
“Oh, actually I think everypony except for Rarity knows about that.”
“Well yeah, I probably should have guessed, Spike is always going on about Rarity.”
“Do you think he will actually tell her?”
“Well I did tell him that he could just get Rarity a gift, since he is too nervous to tell her directly.”
“Well I sure hope Spike will be able to tell Rarity without getting nervous.”
I walked away trying to ignore the fact that Twilight just told my secret to somepony else.
I started walking into town looking for some places to shop for a gift. I started speaking to myself, “I know that Rarity likes jewelry and gemstones, maybe that would make a good gift. Nah, too expensive.” I walked around for a while looking at the stores. I suddenly thought of lots of other gifts I could get Rarity. But then I thought of a better idea. I decided to go to Rarity’s place and see what she was doing. If I could get a chance to talk with her, I could get the perfect gift for her.
I walked over to Rarity’s place and looked through the window. She was still eating breakfast. Suddenly I heard a voice call to me.
“Hey Spike!” I heard as a shadow flew over my head.
I looked up and saw Rainbow Dash flying around me. She landed right next to me.
“What are you doing?” She asked.
“Can you keep a secret?”
“Sure, what’s up?”
“I have a crush on Rarity. I’m trying to find the perfect gift for her, and I’m not sure what to get her.”
“Oh is that all, that’s easy. You just need to find out what kind of stuff she likes.” Suddenly I heard a door open. Rainbow Dash and I ran away to hide. We both jumped behind a tree nearby. Rarity was coming out of her home with her pet cat Opalescence.
“Ah, what a lovely breakfast, I always love a good meal. Come along Opal,” she said. Rarity walked away as I poked my head out from behind from the tree. “Well there’s an idea, you could take her out for dinner,” suggested Rainbow Dash
“That’s brilliant! Thanks Rainbow Dash.” I said as I ran off.
“Good luck,” said Rainbow Dash.
After running for a while I got tired and started walking. I looked at some of the restaurants as I walked by. So many of them were too expensive, I couldn’t afford it. Then I noticed that I was passing by Sugarcube Corner. I thought to myself, Maybe Rarity would like something sweet, like a box a chocolate or candy. I walked in to the store. Pinkie Pie was in there making some treats.
“Hey Pinkie Pie, what are you making?” I asked.
“Oh hi Spike, I’m just making some holiday treats for everypony. You wanna try one? I’m sure you’ll love it,” she said, talking loud and fast.
“Would I? Sure!”
I picked up a star shaped chocolate chip cookie. Then I took a bite.
“Mmm, this is delicious. Rarity would love these.”
“What was that Spike?”
“Oh, um… sorry,”
“What about Rarity liking these?”
“Well, I’m trying to get Rarity a gift for the holidays to tell her how I feel about her.”
“Oh, you still never told her about your crush yet. You should tell her. I still remember you wanted me to keep it a secret, so I never told her either.”
“Yeah, any ideas of what to get her?”
“Well, I bet she would love some cookies. She would love cookies.” Pinkie Pie was starting to get hyper.
“Yeah, I’ll get her some cookies.”
“Great, I’ll make a batch of cookies for you and Rarity.”
“Thanks Pinkie Pie.”
Pinkie started making some cookie dough for my cookies for Rarity. After having one more cookie I started walking home.
When I got back, I noticed Fluttershy and Twilight were still cleaning. I also noticed that Applejack was there too. She was also helping Twilight clean the house.
Twilight noticed I walked in. “Hey Spike, how’s the gift shopping going?” She asked
Then Applejack asked, “Gift shopping? Who ya gettin’ gifts for?”
“Oh, I’m trying to find the perfect gift for Rarity for the holidays. So I decided to do some shopping,” I said.
“Oh that’s just dandy. Whatcha ya get her?”
“I got her some cookies form Sugarcube Corner. She will love them.”
Twilight looked over at me. “Uhh, I don’t think that will be enough to tell Rarity about how you feel,” she said.
“Then what else should I do?”
“How about you write her a love letter,” Fluttershy suggested.
“That’s a great idea,” said Twilight.
I suddenly started to get worried. “What should I write? I’ve never written a love letter.”
“Oh I should be a snap,” said Applejack, “You just tell her that you love her, or maybe even write a poem.”
“A poem huh? I guess I could try writing a poem for Rarity.”
“I think you can do it Spike,” said Fluttershy.
“I guess I’ll try.”
Later that night, Applejack and Fluttershy left. Twilight was already in bed. I stared writing down ideas for a love poem. I tried so many times but I couldn’t think of one. Then it suddenly happened, a genius idea for a love poem. So I started writing. As soon as I finished I began to read it out loud to myself.
The sun lights the day
At night there’s the moon
The best way to spend the holiday
Is being with you.
“That’s perfect!” I said in excitement. Then I noticed it was getting dark out. “I guess it’s time I got some sleep.”
I walked upstairs to my bed; Twilight was already asleep. I laid down in my bed and fell asleep.
The next morning I woke up and got an early start on my chores. I made Twilight some breakfast in bed. Then I went over to Sugarcube Corner to pick up the cookies that Pinkie Pie made.
I walked in and said, “Hey Pinkie Pie, how are the cookies coming along?”
Pinkie Pie looked back and said, “Hi Spike, the cookies are all finished.”
“Thanks Pinkie Pie, I sure hope Rarity will like them.”
“Oh, I’m sure she’ll like them. In fact I think she’ll love them.”
“I sure hope so. Thanks again.”
“Good luck Spike.”
I walked out of Sugarcube Corner with the cookies. I took a peak inside the box to see how they looked. They looked perfect. On my way to Rarity’s house I read over my poem a couple more times. I also started to get really nervous. Will she accept my feelings for her? I hope this goes well.
I arrived at her house, and saw that she was stitching a dress. I tried to toughen up. As soon as I felt like the time was right, I open the door and walked inside.
“Hello, Rarity!” I said loudly.
“Spike?” Rarity was startled.
And then disaster struck. I startled her and she lost control of the sewing machine. Her leg got caught under the needle in the sewing machine. The needle came down and pierced her skin. She cried out in pain as I dropped the cookies and ran over to help her.
“Oh no, Rarity, what have I done?” I was crying too.
“Please somepony help me,” she yelped.
I helped Rarity cover up the wound on her hoof, and got her over to Nurse Redheart. Of course I didn’t want to leave and forget my gift for Rarity. I picked it up on the way out.
“Everything will be okay Rarity, I promise.”
“Please hurry Spike, it hurts so bad.”
I was in such a rush. I didn’t care if the wound was major or minor. I had to help her.
As we arrived at the office, Nurse Redheart took Rarity to a bed. I sat down in the waiting room.
I started talking to myself, “Why did this have to happen? Poor Rarity. She must be in so much pain, it’s all my fault.”
Moments later Twilight, Applejack, Fluttershy, Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie arrived.
Rainbow Dash started shrieking, “I just saw you taking Rarity into here, is she okay?”
“I hope she is. This was all my fault. Now she will never like me,” I responded.
“Now Spike, don’t talk like that, I’m sure she will forgive you,” said Twilight.
Nurse Redheart came into the waiting room.
“Nurse Redheart, is Rarity okay?” Asked Fluttershy.
Nurse Redheart looked at everypony and said, “She is going to be just fine. She might be in some pain. It was just a small puncture on the skin near her hoof. You could have just wrapped it up to stop the pain. Nothing major.”
“Oh thanks goodness,” they all replied.
“Can we see her?” I asked.
“You can come back here, but please be quiet, this is a hospital,” said Nurse Readheart.
We walked into the room that Rarity was in. Pinkie Pie brought in the box of cookies. I rushed over to her bed and apologized for the accident I caused.
“Rarity, I am so sorry for what I did, I didn’t know I would startle you, this is all my fault.”
“Oh, Spike, it’s okay,” Rarity said, “It still hurts but I know you didn’t mean to do it.”
“I um…” I was too nervous to tell her about the gift.
“What is it Spike?” She asked.
“I uh…” My cheeks started to blush.
“What’s wrong Spike?” Rarity might have noticed my cheeks blushing.
“When I came into your house I was going to bring you a gift.”
“Yes, it was supposed to be for the holidays.”
“I have it right here,” Pinkie Pie interrupted.
I stepped closer to Rarity and said, “I couldn’t really think of a perfect gift, so I got you a treat from Sugarcube Corner.”
Rarity began to blush, “Oh Spike you didn’t have to…”
“And I also wrote a poem for you.” I began to read the poem to her. “The sun lights the day, and at night there’s the moon, the best way to spend the holiday, is being with you.”
A tear came out from Rarity’s eye as she said, “Oh Spike, that was beautiful.”
“The truth is Rarity, I’m in love with you. I’ve been in love with you since I first laid my eyes on you.”
Then the greatest moment of my life happened, she puckered her lips, and we kissed. My first kiss ever, and with the pony of my dreams.
Everypony looked at us, “Aww, how sweet.”
Rarity looked up at me and said, “Spike, I would love to spend the holiday with you.” Then we kissed again.
Nurse Redheart checked Rarity out of the room and escorted us out of the hospital. Rarity and I leaned our heads against each other as we left the office.
“I love you Rarity,” I said as we walked. My cheeks were blushing even more.
“I love you too Spike,” she said back, “and thanks for the gift, even though you didn’t need to get me a gift.”
“Why don’t we go over to Sugarcube Corner for some hot chocolate?” suggested Pinkie Pie, while hopping in excitement.
“That would be wonderful,” said Applejack.
“Sure, I would love some cocoa,” said Rainbow Dash.
“Then let’s go,” said Twilight.
As we sat together sipping on hot chocolate, we started chatting about what to do for the holidays.
“I think this is going to be the best Heart Warming Eve ever,” I said, “Because I’m spending it with you, Rarity.”
“Oh thank you Spike,” she said back.
And then we gave each other one more kiss before we continued to drink some more hot chocolate.
And that is the story on my first kiss, and my best Hearth’s Warming Eve ever.