Swatteam and the Potato

by _Rainbow_Swag_

The Heart

"Swat!"

...

"SWAT!"

"I'm coming, Sweetie!" Swatteam1013 called from up the stairs as he quickly got dressed. Like every other day, he had woken up late. As he rushed down the stairs, Pinkie Pie sat at the couch, looking like a million bits. "You look amazing, Honeybunch."

"Don't call me 'Honeybunch,'" said Pinkie Pie, rolling her eyes. "Or 'Sweetie'. Now, come on! I'm going into town now so I need you to: sweep the kitchen, do the dishes, pull the weeds, mow the lawn, do the laundry (make sure to separate colors and whites), vacuum the house, clean my room, dust the walls and ceiling fixtures, clean the bathrooms, get that nasty stuff out of the gutter, sweep the chimney, and reorganize the refrigerator and cupboards."

Swat smiled. "Anything for you, my love."

"Yeah, okay." Pinkie said as she skipped out the door, not even glancing back at him. "I'll see you in a while!"

"I love you!" Swat called, but Pinkie had already closed the door behind her. She must have been in too much of a rush to say she loved him back.

Now, first thing was first, Swat opened his laptop and quickly went to Equestriadaily.com. What luck! It was 6:00! He was just in time for a post! He scanned what Sethisto was rambling on about and looked at the picture to go along with the post. He frowned. There was a picture of Fluttershy and Pinkie both inside a huge heart. He got nervous, then reassured himself. "Pinkie wouldn't do that to me. We're together forever!" Still, he could feel a hint of jealousy in his heart. "Fluttershy isn't even that cute..." Swat lied to himself. "And besides, if they were together, she would break up with me first." The thought of Pinkie Pie breaking his heart like that worried Swat even more. He closed his laptop.

No. It was just a picture. Pinkie was his true love. Just because they were in a heart didn't mean.... well, it didn't mean anything. Swat took that thought and went on with it.

"Yeah!" He said aloud. "A heart around two ponies doesn't mean anything! You can put a heart around anything! Just because a potato and I have a heart around us doesn't mean we're in love or anything!" To prove his point to himself, Swat grabbed a potato from the kitchen, snatched up a large piece of paper and a red crayon, and drew himself a crude heart. He stood in the heart, potato in hoof. "There! see!" He said to no one. Then he looked at the potato. The nice, round, beautiful potato...