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To Twilight Sparkle and Princess Celestia, it is a simple surprise visit to Canterlot. To the ponies of the Equestrian Civil Service, it is twenty-four hours of chaos, politics, weaponized dessert, politics, underhooved manipulation of media, politics, and things batrachian and tentacular. Who said bureaucracy isn't exciting?
First!
Ha, I never got to say that before. :)
Anyway, I'm stealing the idea of using the first comment for Author's notes from my good friend Bad Horse. You can also find them, unsurprisingly, in the Footnotes & Author's Notes chapter. I wanted to put them in the description but after an hour of trying I gave up. It's impossible to control where the 'more' will appear and if it bisects your link, well, it ceases to link anywhere.
This story has been pre-read by Bad Horse, a noted scholar of pony words and the author of a great many lovely stories, and Dagger Tongue who is the proud co-author of On Wings of Change. A little bird tells me that he's also going to write a story of his own, so do be on the lookout for that. Varanus, who I feel needs no introduction, was also of great help with certain grammatical problems and, also, caught that I had forgotten my own character's name at one point.
The cover image is by the inestimable KP-ShadowSquirrel who has kindly agreed to let me use it here. The original image can be found on the artist's DA profile, or by following the link below.
KP-ShadowSquirrel's DA profile.
I hope you enjoy the story, and thank you for reading!
Chapter one.
Just. Chapter one. I have no words, your style of humor is simply off the charts ghost. If this doesn't get featured, I'm going to mutiny against reality.
I bow to my superior.
All hail Ghost; Herald of Humor, Creator of Comedy, and Practitioner of the Pony Prose.
-Koba
Whelp, you're my new god now.
Or would have been, except when you said "last minute changes of heart" you actually typed lass. 
I love this. Just one chapter and I LOVE it.
Moving on to chapter 2.
Gosh. Making me blush here, Koba.
Mmm. I've a special arrangement with the Lords Of Creation that allows the fic to coexist with, you know, the material universe.
I'm happy you liked it. 
I'm on record as shipping GhostOfHeraclitus/Footnotes. Strictly speaking, though, these are endnotes. But that's okay. I'm very modern about that sort of thing.
And then, as if by magic, the typo[1] was fixed. Can I be your deity now? I'm very easy on the smiting, light on fasting and acts of penance and I have a very liberal set of commandments. 
Glad you are enjoying yourself!
[1] A typo that survived three pre-readers and and four "final editing sweeps." Resilient bastard.
Well, here at GhostOfHeraclitus Divinity Services Inc. we aim for customer satisfaction above all other things. As a result we are industry leaders in tailoring our divinity towards the individual needs of prospective worshipers, you may be interested in our Flexible Godhood(TM) program and, especially, our Give Me That Old Time Religion(TM) package: for just a few prayers extra, you can have upwards of six major smiting instances a month and with our new pray-as-you-go contract you can even tailor the smiting to your own needs: locusts, pillars of salt, rains of blood, spongecake massacre, and more!
GOH Divinity Services: Who Do You Want To Pray To Today?
Spongecake massacre? SCORE! Sign me UP!
For a brief insane moment she considered confirming everything, just to see the look on that reporter's face as she capered and danced off into the sunset, magnificently lit by the flames of her burning career. It was a tempting vision.
That is the greatest mental imagine I have ever seen described.
Psh, everyone knows Twilight keeps a giant turtle with 4 elephants on its back in her wardrobe. She managed to have it moved to the Books and Branches last week.
Ooooh. Shaped like frogs.
Oh lord. That was wonderful. The words horrifying and entertaining once again come together in my head. You have a serious gift with words. You know precisely what words to use to convey your exact meaning. It reminds me of the writing of Terry Pratchett or Douglas Adams actually. If this is the quality of your [i[starting work, I think we can expect great things in the future.
Cadance is totally in town at this moment to hear Celestia's announcement that Twilight Sparkle is her immaculately conceived starchild, as well as the declaration that Twilight is to be the new Overtyrant of Equestria. Obviously.
I love lower deck episodes. And footnotes endnotes.
Oh high holy hell. I came for the story (Dagg sent me), but I'm staying for the Ghost. "Give Me That Old Time Religion" You sir, are a god amongst men... and whatever Koba is. Also, GhostOfHeraclitus/Footnotes, hm? Ghostnotes: OTP.
EDIT: Pray-as-you-go OHHHHHHHHMYGOD
Oh high holy hell. I came for the story (Dagg sent me), but I'm staying for the Ghost.
Ah, another candidate for the "Things Said About Me" quotes field. With your kind permission?
Also, GhostOfHeraclitus/Footnotes, hm? Ghostnotes: OTP.
Our love is a forbidden one, but all the more passionate. What kind of a world is it where a man can't stand up, proud, and say "Yes, yes I am in love with an abstract typographical convention? Is that so wrong?"
EDIT: Pray-as-you-go OHHHHHHHHMYGOD
Brilliant! It was very reminiscent of reading Pratchett, and not just because of the footnotes. It's unusual to see a story which centers around OCs be so engaging, but I would happily read more about the Civil Service ponies and their endless struggle against generalized idiocy. In the meantime, I would offer feedback to help you improve as a writer if I could, but you're working well over my skill level. Instead I'll point out all of your typos like a total jerk.
Yes, all three of them! And in all seriousness, I really only noticed these little things because this is one of the most technically perfect fics (as far as my American public school abilities can detect) that I've ever come across on this site. Here are the three I found, listed for your editing convenience...
1. "That she has come, Dotted? That's what we fear. We can only hope for the latter." said Lady Cloudsdale, her tone suggestive. [The period before the quotation mark should be a comma.]
2. And one, a certain Ivory Abacus, was too occupied watching the cabinet secretary pivot trough the air to get any distance in. [Through]
3. The moment he saw her he knew—the princess was here, and nothing can go wrong anymore. As long, of course, the princess is happy. [There is a missing 'as' in the second sentence. Also, and this one I'm not sure of, should the 'can' in the first sentence be 'could' because of the earlier 'was'? As in: '- the princess was here, and nothing could go wrong anymore.']
Tl;dr: Wonderful! Nitpicking! More please!
Brilliant! It was very reminiscent of reading Pratchett, and not just because of the footnotes.
It's unusual to see a story which centers around OCs be so engaging, but I would happily read more about the Civil Service ponies and their endless struggle against generalized idiocy.
I would be lying if I said I wasn't thinking of other ways to erode Dotted's dwindling reserves of sanity. So I won't. Because lying is wrong.
Yes, all three of them! And in all seriousness, I really only noticed these little things because this is one of the most technically perfect fics (as far as my American public school abilities can detect) that I've ever come across on this site. Here are the three I found, listed for your editing convenience...
Ah, the wonders of not relying on dead trees as a publishing medium. The typos are all gone. I'm just amazed they survived the scrutiny this thing was put through. Then again, real honest-to-goodness published books have typos, so I shouldn't be surprised.
Tl;dr: Wonderful! Nitpicking! More please!
Lwjf;dr[1]: Glad! Thanks! Working on it.
[1] Length was just fine;did read
Blackmail! Such an ugly word. No no no, Dotted is just expressing how sad, nay, despondent he would be if details about the Cypress Hall project were to leak (the cabinet is like a sieve these days, it really is, makes you wonder what the world's coming to, it really does) to certain papers leading to the Honorable Member being unseated. Honest.
In seriousness, a) politics is a dirty business, here or in Equestria, b) the views of the characters aren't necessarily those of the author c) Sky Slicer had it coming.
I really did. It had me going:
Although, I think that for the idea behind the story, it was pretty much the perfect length. Not too short and feeling rushed and not too long and starting to strain the concept. It of course did what all good stories do and left me wanting more material to feed my insatiable addiction.
The humour was top notch, and as others have said, reminiscent of such masters as Pratchett and Adams. The best part for me was how you seamlessly inserted the reader into the heads of characters and let their natural reactions to the situations drive the humour. The smidgen of eldritch abominations and weaponized spreads and desserts certainly didn't hurt either.
The harshest criticism I can give is that the footnotes (endnotes? Who cares for technicalities? THIS IS PONIES!) seemed to dry up towards the end. The longest chapter, chapter three, only had two and chapter four had none at all! Clearly this heinous act on the behalf of the author cannot go unpunished.
In conclusion, really really good. If this doesn't make the featured box / EQD then there is something terribly wrong with this reality.
P.S. Any chance of borrowing some writing skills and focus from GOH Divinity Services (I sure there are some livestock nearby that I can sacrifice to the gods [1]).
[1] Although, knowing Australian fauna, the gods might decide I was trying to kill them instead of worship them.
I really did. It had me going:
I remember first figuring out that books do, inevitably, end when I was a child. I've never felt so betrayed.
The harshest criticism I can give is that the footnotes (endnotes? Who cares for technicalities? THIS IS PONIES!) seemed to dry up towards the end. The longest chapter, chapter three, only had two and chapter four had none at all! Clearly this heinous act on the behalf of the author cannot go unpunished.
I'm going to blame Scrivener. I love that program to pieces, I really do, but its support for footnotes is of the devil. Ugh. Clearly, if I ever write something else, I'll need to make sure that I put in more footnotes. I just gotta have more cowbell footnotes.
In conclusion, really really good. If this doesn't make the featured box / EQD then there is something terribly wrong with this reality.
You know what with you and Koba proclaiming my imminent triumph I feel this is going to end up like on of _those_ sentences. You know. This ship is unsinkable. Iceberg? Pfffft. 
P.S. Any chance of borrowing some writing skills and focus from GOH Divinity Services (I sure there are some livestock nearby that I can sacrifice to the gods [1]).
We are always there to serve prospective worshipers. Please state the nature of the religious emergency?
[1] Although, knowing Australian fauna, the gods might decide I was trying to kill them instead of worship them.
GOH: APPROACH SUPPLICANT AND LET US SEE THY SACRIFICE!
SL: Well uh, I have this. Uh. Damn. *stabbity*
GOH: YES. GOOD. THY GOD IS A GRACIOUS GOD AND THY SACRIFICE WILL NOT BE FORGOTTEN LET US SEE IT IS...aaargh...it's biting my....OH ME IT BURNS IT BURNS OH ME WHY IS IT POISONOUS AND VENOMOUS TWICE...aghhaaragha...EATING MY FACE....
SL: Perhaps I shouldn't have sacrificed the rare and endangering[1] Blue Ringed Dropbear.
[1] It was supposed to be 'endangered' but it ate the ecologists who were doing the population survey.
>>1397975 I remember first figuring out that books do, inevitably, end when I was a child. I've never felt so betrayed.
We at Bad Horse Industries have come up with a solution to this problem:
Fascinating. I'm partial to the old Borges 1000 model (they don't make 'em like they used to) but I'm seriously considering switching. It works fine enough, but it keeps eating bookmarks. Very frustrating.
Dotted's gray coat took an a disturbingly greenish cast.I believe this should be "on a".
That was only typo I noticed, so good on ya for that.
On to comments, which I'll be leaving as I read each chapter.
The humor is wonderful. It is so dry and sudden, I just can't help but burst out laughing. The writing itself is reminiscent of Douglas Adams and I adore that so very much.
The blade could come off, after all...
This line right here is where you sold it. Up until that line I had my suspicions about the kind of ride I was in for, and right there you made me pull out wallet to buy a ticket. If this chapter is any indication of the quality of the ride ahead, I have no doubts I'll be buying more tickets.
Other notables include the fun characterization, and the way you managed to make learning about Equestria's politics compelling and interesting. For what is presented thus far, a cast of OC ponies, you've managed to make each one you spotlighted feel both natural and interesting in a very short time.
I'm eagerly looking forward to more of this. I'll endeavor leave my thoughts on each chapter as I finish them.
My money is on the good ship USS Twilestia.
The story is very clever and written in delightfully overwrought prose of a sort of vaguely British flavor (flavour?). I learned that some folks call a zucchini a "courgette," and I also learned that some folks have yet to realize that zucchini-flavored baked goods are delicious, which is terrible. Also, I must protest your characterization of poor Rarity, for I firmly believe that she would not be so easily taken by the popularization of an eldritch brain leech as adornment for one's head. But anyway, this was a real treat.
Ah, a GOH story! Can't read now, but will definitely do so later. I've been eagerly awaiting your first work, as you are one of very few internet dwellers to cling to my memory through comments alone. That's no small feat, considering my memory is kind of like a sieve someone has shot repeatedly.
And then fed into a blender.
And then shot again.
I truly wish FIM:FIC would implement the feature that you had to leave a comment before you down-voted something. If you find something is bad about a fic, please tell us why so we can fix it. {Or tell you why you're an idiot.} 
Anyways, I can only assume that this hasn't passed moderation yet, as I've yet to see it in the feature box.
Hope to see you there soon,
-Dagg
PS: The Titanic was sunk by poorly smelted iron rivets. True story.
well this story is tied with Slice of Life for my top comedy slot, SoL has slapstick and whole lot of references going for it, while this story is more in the subtle-yet-obvious category, like as people have mentioned Douglas Adams and Terry Pratchett, I will also add The Bartimeaus Trilogy, by Jonathan Stround, to the list of comparative works just because of the funny footnotes
Hope you write more like this
The Equestrian Civil Service can neither confirm nor deny such scurrilous rumors impugning the immaculate character of Her Highness, Princess Celestia and the Lady Sparkle, Hero of Equestria.
Ah, English is not my first language, so my vocabulary is a mishmash of British and American usage. As a result, I call them courgettes. You'll be pleased to know that Pinkie did eventually crack the problem. The solution, it turns out, was hot sauce. A lot of hot sauce.
Oh, I agree. Rarity isn't a fashion follower -- she's a fashion setter. But she needs to keep a close eye on trends, be they leechlike or not, so she can stay at the top of her game. Mind, those decorative leeches are very attractive.
Oh when she was living there the chaos was less focused but more sustained. So sustained, in fact, that Dotted got his current job early. His predecessor now lives, retired, in a cottage on the foothills of the Unicorn Range where she refuses to see any newspapers and refuses to deal with any unit of time shorter than a season.
Lessee, Beleaguered Bureaucrat. Bothering by the Book, Blackmail Is Such an Ugly Word, Government Procedural, Incredibly Lame Pun, Manipulative Bastard, Our Prime Ministers Are Different, Reassigned to Antarctica, Servile Snarker, Sesquipedalian Loquaciousness, Sleazy Politician...that's a decent start, surely.
I'd link to the relevant pages on TvTropes, of course, but I like my readers and I haven't the heart to throw them into that particular black hole.
Astounding.........I haven't even read the damn thing yet and the COMMENTS are cracking me up. Now I know I must read this. Probably right now, no less.
Alright, I'm going in. I'll be back with another comment when I'm finished............Should I not make it back, My last will and testament can be found in the 43rd feather up on the right wing of my Statue to Princess Luna...........*ahem* what? 
............ And Mr. Heraclitus, get that GOH Divinity Services paperwork ready, you just might have another worshipper when I'm done with this. 
Some parts of this story leave me completely baffles me. It isn't the description of political workings (although those are somewhat of a chore to comprehend). Nor is it your writing style, which could be described as more hectic than most stories on fimfiction, but I'm sure I'll get use to interpreting it as I go through the chapters (hopefully). No, what I find confusing are certain character motivations and actions concerning the plot.
Firstly, the situation with the this "Silverwing" noble. What exactly does Dotted mean that this guy "is going to run roughshod over all of the service. He has every right to complain to Her Highnesses now." I understand he's suppose to be an affluential noble, but what can he do exactly? I understand he made some sort of deal to keep the arrest discreet, but what could he complain about that would equate to police brutality? They apparantly put a bunch of locks on him, but they didn't throw him to the ground or beat him in anyway (at least that you mentioned). Also, the threat Silverwing poses right now is that he might make make an "appeal to the princess." Could you explain what "appeal" in this context means? What would it do to help him get out of sexually assaulting a minor? In fact, why would Princess Celestia ever help this dirtbag? Fan fiction means interpreting the characters and their world in your own way, but under what circumstances would Princess Celestia excuse a sexual offender? Granted, sexual offense isn't a topic breached by most stories on this site, but I cannot possibly see either of the Princesses letting a person like that worm out of the consequences.
On a related note, this sentence completely confused me: "They have foals in the Met, too, you know. Sisters. Relatives. What do you think—"
What is the "Met?" Is it a police station? Is Leafy descibing a list of ponies molested by Silverwing? I just have no idea what the context is.
The other seperate event that needs some explaining for me is what is FECK is going on with Scootaloo:
"Just as her beleaguered mind tried to process what she just heard, something orange, blurry, and really quite fast flew right at her. She realized that this was a foal and, without even thinking about it, leaped ahead to catch it before it cratered onto the flagstones of the plaza. She managed to grab the little orange missile from the air, spin with as much grace as was possible under the circumstances, and land on the ground on her own four hooves."
My first thought is, "Scootaloo FLYING?" My next is, "What is she doing?" You say that she was about to smash into the pavement. Was she about to injure herself? Was she trying to just make a hole in the paved ground to earn a cutie mark for protesting/public destruction? How would she even do that without something like a giant hammer? Attempting to destroy government property is the only reason I can think of for a government employee manhandling a child.
Oh when she was living there the chaos was less focused but more sustained. So sustained, in fact, that Dotted got his current job early. His predecessor now lives, retired, in a cottage on the foothills of the Unicorn Range where she refuses to see any newspapers and refuses to deal with any unit of time shorter than a season.
"BYCELESTIA'SSUNANDALLTHATISBRIGHTANDHOLY!SHEDIDIT!SHEACTUALLYDIDIT!WE'REDOOMED!"
"Slow down so we can understand you, Dotted Line! Take a few deep breaths."
"DOOMED, I TELL YOU! DOOMED! — gasp —"
"In… Out… In… Out… That's it. Now, who's done what that's doomed us all?"
"It's — gasp — Twilight Sparkle, ma'am. SHE'S — gasp — LEARNED TO TELEPORT!"
"Are you sure? Are you absolutely sure? No unicorn since Clover the Clever has successfully cast that spell!"
"She materialized in the bloody throne room before Celestia, myself, and the ENTIRE BLOODY COURT! GIGGLING! YES, MA'AM, I'M BLOODY WELL SURE!"
"Right, then. I hoped that this day would never come. Inform the Royal Guard that we are going to TWICON 1. I repeat, TWICON 1. May Celestia have mercy on our souls."
This... this... Oh, dear Celestia, this masterpiece... I have no words for how happy this entire story has made me. I can't seem to wipe this huge smile off my face, and my smile frequency can be measured by blue moons. I shall watch your writing career on this sight with considerable interest, and if you ever publish an actual book, then I'll eagerly buy it. Bravo, indeed!
>>1420052 No... this requires... more...
Greatest story ever.
Both amused, and feeling sorry for the guy at the end.
Twas hoping Twi could have somehow cheered him up, but alas...
Brilliant! Absolutely magnificent!
One minor quibble, though - you seem to jump back and forth between present and past tense a few times, especially in chapter three. Ex. "In the privacy of her head Spinning swore. This was going to turn into a right and proper hatchet job. She can deny anything she pleases, that just means that Canterlot News Nightly will run something with a headline like..."
Dear heavens that was one of the most amusing things I have read in an age. I'm still clearing out the tears from my laughter and checking to make sure I didn't wake anyone with it. The word choice helped sell the whole story given the kind of ponies it contained. I'm going to favorite this so I can pull it up when I need a good lark in the insanity that is the daily life.
Okay I have returned. I almost died of laughter there in the last chapter but pulled through grinning. Seriously, though, this was a wonderful read all the way through. And I especially loved the last chapter.
I started to really feel for Dotted Line in all his escapades and can honestly say I liked him. His cynicism was wonderful and I was impressed at how well he handled a Tower covered in custard and filled with wall to wall jam, among his many entertaining issues he had to deal with. At least he got a pet out of the whole thing. I also enjoyed all the others you presented too. It felt kinda refreshing, for me anyway, to read about others besides the main six, or the princesses, or the usual background characters, and to see events going on behind the scenes, as it were, in Equestrian life. I greatly enjoyed the immense scale of vocabulary and the way it was presented too. Such a delicious variety for the mind here with entertaining conversations and vivid detail in description. And that humor, sweet Celestia, that humor. As you've heard many times by now, your comedy is golden and I completely agree.
All in all, Great stuff Mr. Heraclitus. You certainly deserve the thumbs, favs, and watches you receive. Mine included, of course, and give your freind The Bad Horse my thanks aswell for directing me here with his last blog posting.
Now, about those GOH DIvinity Services.......... *pulls out a pen and clicks it open*
First of all, the 'Met' is short for the Canterlot Metropolitan Police Force. It's no secret that I've based my Equestria a bit on the UK and the nickname they give to the Metropolitan Police Service (that's responsible for Greater London minus the City of London) is 'the Met'. Sorry, didn't think it would cause confusion.
Now, the Silverwing situation is meant to be a bit confusing, after all, it's a slice of the daily issues the Service deals with and it is meant to be a bit fuzzy on the details. But since you ask: The nobles in Equestria have a number of privileges (a word, itself, that derives from 'private law' interestingly enough) and special rights that are guaranteed by ancient agreements and such. Society has moved on beyond this, and there is growing discontent with the situation, but all the relevant laws are on the books and still, technically, valid. By those laws young Silverwing ought to have advantages in the trial process because it demands that the jury be filled with fellow nobles (most of whom he's, of course, related to) and privileging his words over the accuser's, considering it is, after all, a common pony (Juniper Leaf, an Earth Pony mare who was only attending the social function where the assault took place because her family did the catering). Further, the investigation has been hindered monstrously by noble society who closed ranks and refused any sort of cooperation. When sufficient damning evidence has been acquired through some deft police work (and the testimony of one Velvet Masque, a major in the 143rd Scout Battalion. She had been the one to stop matters before they escalated.) Dotted in his capacity as Wrangler of The Nobility for Her Highnesses (suprisingly not an official title) managed to parlay these investigative results into an agreement that the matter can progress through the normal courts, and that it would not be fought, as long as there is no publicity and none of the other members of the nobility are charged with obstruction of justice.
As you can see I worked the details out beforehand, but my story was already exposition-heavy and I didn't feel an infodump like the one above would help the narrative move along snappily.
Scootaloo was, again, supposed to come over from nowhere illustrating the bewildered state of Spinning Top. But, since you asked, they had all donned balaclavas and had their slogans all nicely memorized but weren't sure about how you go about protesting. Sweetie Belle had, from cursory examination of her sister's newspapers, a notion that protestors just sort of...stood around. Scootaloo considered this approach insufficiently awesome and, thus, found a pleasantly inclined bit of marble statuary (the cloak of some pony hero or another) and, guided by her principle of WWRDD, decided to take this protesting thing airborne.
Hope the answers at least amused you.
Hey! No upstaging the author with the funny!
But yes. Something like that.
Well, if you look at that map of Equestria that's been floating around, you'll see a pair of islands northwest of Vanhoover. Dotted is supposed to be from the more northerly one. But, given that I've based my Equestria a bit on the UK, it is also, I hope, clear that Dotted is supposed to be a bit Scottish. In fact, I described him as low, wide and of shaggy coat -- in other words a Shetland Pony.
Yes! It's very much supposed to put you in mind of those very shows. In fact, there used to be a bit where a Sir Apple-Pie (scion of two great families, even!) is mentioned as having the Minister for Administrative Affairs well in hoof, but I cut it out for being too self-indulgent.
I'm glad someone caught that one. Actually each title is supposed to reference something. Stygium is from Terry Pratchett's Making Money and Soapstone Statue is meant to be a Lovecraft pastiche. The statue of Cthulhu recovered from the Louisiana ritual is described as greenish soapy stone.
Possibly. I did think about that, but in the end I decided that I wasn't narrating anymore, as such, but was instead describing the general situation as if from her point of view. So I went present-tense. Could be wrong, I grant you, but I liked the sound of it.
I see. Read the review. 'Didn't like it' is the vibe I'm getting from it.
Awesome story. Incredibly reminiscent of the best scenes from Python, and the heigh of Pratchett's writing.
I'd love to see more, as you obviously had all sorts of ideas on what could actually be happening in the background that you just never put into the actual story.
Like Lord Bucket, I was getting this devious, devious feeling in the back of my skull that I had stumbled upon a fusion of MLP and Yes, Minister. Lo and behold, it all its wondrous glory, it is. I love you and think that you deserve better than a mere emoticon:
Ho ho, I hope Sir Humphrey is on Celestia's side 
I'm going to be frank here... I didn't get a lot of the humor in this story, up until the final chapter.
This story was recommended to me by several people, and i now understand why. This story's already thrown me from my chair once in laughter. Also the sheer humor of it all going wrong for Dotted really speaks to all of us, well me, at least. We've had those days, and we cherish the little victories in them.
But seriously, decorative leeches? That's completely ingenious. I would say photo finish might be a little pissed at being the target of that lie, but she might actually thank him later for it. Now, where does one acquire a 'decorative leech' to wear?
I believe i can say Congratulations on making it to EQD as well, from what the people who recommended it to me said.
+1 fave, watch, and thumb. You deserve em.
Random question time:
[7] The rooms were named by the Princess who was, in that century, in something of a puckish mood. Other rooms include the 'Salon of Desperate Yellows' and the 'Irritatingly Long Gallery'. Luckily for school tour guides in the subsequent centuries, the name "Hall of Phallic Pillars" was vetoed, with as much tact as possible, by the then Cabinet Secretary. Sadly this act of heroism remained unrecorded by pony history.
What is this a reference to? I swear i know a similar version of this from somewhere.
Now that would be a clash of wills. Or, as the show itself points out, a clash of the political will and the administrative won't.
As for the (unholy) fusion of MLP and Yes, Minister I propose that we name it. My suggestion is: My Little Minister: Bureaucracy is Magic.
Well, though the story is full of little references (nobody got the Deus Ex:Human Revolution one--understandable considering how deep I buried it) that bit is, to the best of my knowledge, all mine. I just riffed on the notion of the rooms being named things like "The Yellow Drawing Room" and added just a soupçon of Trollestia and there you go.
That's the thing. That quote isn't the reference, word for word. What i meant is having silly names for rooms or buildings from a ruler just on a whim. I know i've read (or seen, not sure) something like that somewhere before this. I will admit your names are funnier than i recall the 'original sighting's' to be.
Then again, i could be am totally completely insane. I remember the weirdest things that seemingly never happened, so there's that.
Wordy and crunchy, this story is like delicious peanut brittle for the brain. Not a swift read, despite its length, but worthwhile, and like the aforementioned candy, it leaves you picking tasty bits of it out of your teeth for hours to come. You've drawn your (largely) OC cast with impeccable warmth and solidity, and while the narrative occasionally gets lost in the language's mechanical cleverness, I really should expect nothing less from your pen. I am shocked, shocked to find footnotes here, I should add.
There were a few niggly points where I would disagree with the verb tense usage, but otherwise, a very quality execution. Grade A, will read again. Congrats on a most impressive debut.
This is actually the best characterisation of Celestia the Goddess that I've seen on this site so far. All-knowing, all-seeing and all-powerful (at least in any terms that matter) and also essentially very kindly, gentle and maternal to her Little Ponies.
The whole situation in this chapter was, once again, a fine merger of Yes, Minister and Discworld. I liked the leaking of the scoop to Equestria Daily so that Twilight's visit would be forced off the front page. I even more liked that it was done in a gentlemare's club, just the sort of place where two mares of importance would meet to discuss business of the greatest import and discretion but should not under any circumstances be committed to the official record. I'd bet many would be surprised at just how much of the real world's government is done in such a manner.
Yeah, it never ends, does it? There's always a new day full of new idiots. Still, at least this one has been concluded with a minimum of destruction. He even managed to get a cup of tea from the Goddess Herself out of it!
I'm holding Dotted Line solely and personally responsible for Rarity going to the bog in an attempt to find her own brain leech. 
Fortunately, fashion trends are things that pass in the night; no-one needs to worry about long-term consequences because there is no long-term.
A brilliant comic work! Well done!
This is quite possibly one of the funniest stories I've read on this site. The wit is so dry you can burn down all of California with it, and I love it! All the little internal monologues, brilliant wordplay... Ah, this is simply splendid! I dearly hope you'll write something more in this style, good sir, for these characters are wonderful! 
I think my favourite scene is Celestia's little appearance... Talk about the answers to your prayers!
Okay, normally I try and write longer responses to stories. I think it's a disservice to the author not to at least try and go over the best bits and things you feel could use improving, and generally provide feedback longer than a single line. But I can't here. This is one of the few stories I've simply read straight through, without a single thing tossing me into edit/critique mode. As an enormous Celestia fan I especially loved her brief cameo - and the fact that it was a brief cameo makes it work far better. After all, the story isn't about her...
Overall I can only say this is glorious. It's uplifting to read. It's humor that makes you feel good about everything and just generally brightens your day.
Pretty hilarious, I have to say! If you think you can keep the story straight, more please; by which I mean that an invasion by Cthulu is out of the question. This is all funny, but its hilarity has kind some kind of relation to the probable likelihood of Equestria's continued existence and remaining at least minimally organized.
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I resent that statement thrice over you muck-dredging frivolous mouth breather. You know very well what I am.[1]
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...is this...a My Little Pony Yes, Minister crossover...? It is! 
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