“Of Parties and Rainbows”
by Donny’s Boy
Synopsis: A series of drabbles exploring the relationship between Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie. Most will be romantic in nature.
“I Am Afraid”
Sometimes, I don’t tell the truth.
Like, about the corncakes. It wasn’t two corncakes, or three, or even six. It was … well, it was a lot of corncakes. A lot of corncakes.
But it’s not always my fault, at least not entirely. For example, I never actually came out and said that there isn’t anything I’m afraid of. That’s just something other ponies assumed, all on their own. Just because I’m not scared of spooky old woods, or dragons, or hydras, or chocolate rain, doesn’t mean that I’m completely fearless or something silly like that. I don’t know why it should mean that, but ponies seem to think that’s what it means.
The truth is, there are lots of things I fear. I’m afraid of my friends getting tired of me and not wanting to come to my parties anymore. I’m afraid of the look Twilight gets every once in a while, like she wants to cast a spell that will make me disappear forever, which is worrying since forever is a really long time. I’m afraid of not being a good worker and disappointing the Cakes, because I love the Cakes and owe them so much.
But mostly? Mostly, I’m afraid of Rainbow Dash.
I’m afraid of her eyes, which are as beautiful and sparkling as any gem Rarity’s ever found, and I’m scared of her laugh, which always makes my insides feel all warm and jiggly and strange, like I’ve eaten too many candies. I’m afraid of her standing too close, because it makes me feel like I’ve suddenly burst into flames, and I’m afraid of her standing too far away, because it makes everything in the world feel empty and dark and cold.
I’m afraid of every confusing thought and complicated feeling that Dashie stirs up inside me, and I’m afraid of how I can’t make any of it stop or go away.
And I am afraid of how desperately I want to kiss her whenever she smiles at me. She smiles at me too much.
She doesn’t smile at me enough.
I don’t understand any of this, and yet … and yet, I think some part of me does. Understand, I mean. Maybe not understand everything, but understand enough.
Enough to be terrified that one of these days, she’ll finally slip up, I’ll finally slip up, and this entire house of cards will be blown all to pieces and nopony will be able to put us back together.