Even the toughest of us have emotions. When a certain cyan daredevil is feeling under the weather, Twilight ventures to help Rainbow out of her rut, and possibly gain more than she had hoped for.
That was stupid cute and I loved it.
stared and thumbed up. Enough said
Short, cute, shipping involved. I smell featured.
I.....wow......one of the best ships on the Rainbow/Sparkle angle ever read............thanks for the uplift....I needed this one today......bloody good show!
And you are excused from the minor mistakes mentioned in the A/Ns
I'm jelly. You can have a complete story under 20k words. That will not be possible for mine.
That was just too cute for me to handle. I-I-
So beautiful, love it. This just touch my heart, great work.
I enjoyed this. It was that pick-me-up cute that everyone needs from time to time.
One thing that peeved me off about the story was your use of links to video's and music and whatnot. I mean, I'm here to read your story, why would you want to direct my attention elsewhere? Stuff like that should only be added into the A/N at the end of the fic in my opinion, because it encourages re-readability, being able to enjoy a scene that much more because you know what inspired it, not have it be a distraction while reading it.
Cute... painfully so.
This needs featured. That was just pure cuteness wrapped up in a few thousand words.
Any hope for a sequel?
That was a fun read, (helps that its my favorite ship) brought some moisture to the eyes near the end. Excellent story really well done. Only question, what does yonks mean?
. . . . daw :3
That was ridiculously cute and I loved every moment of it!
Cute and sweet. A little over the top with the Wonderbolts favor Twilight was able to arrange, but not enough to make me stop reading. Thumbs up for you.
Couple of minor errors, as you mentioned:
Daring Do and the Quest for the Goron’s Ruby - should this be Gorgon's Ruby?
Well Twilight said you’d help us with out flying techniques today - should probably be "our"
Also, I've never heard the word "yonks" before. At all. Ever.
>>I’ve been trying to get into the Wonderbolts for yonks now
>>Rainbow’s been wanting to perform with you guys for yonks, now
Actually had to Google this one! Some sort of local British slang for years / a long time / ages? Learn something new everyday, I guess.
Very sweet. After dozens of doomed romances dancing across my screen, I was happy to see one that worked out nicely -- at least for the moment.
Oooo, Chester See. Awesome choice
It's short and the reveal feels just a little bit forced.
All in all though an enjoyable piece of writing.
D'aaawwww, this story let a flower of happiness bloom in my heart. Thank for that.
>>13541901354190 Hmm, yeah good point. But the story was inspired from those two links, so I don't know how it would have worked without. Thanks for enjoying it though
>>13544391354439 Gorons from Legend a of Zelda: Ocarina of Time. Just a little reference I though I'd throw in. And yes, well spotted. I'll edit that now
>>13551601355160 Hmm, forced how? Elaborate a bit?
And thanks to everypony who enjoyed my story. Honestly wasn't expecting so much positive feedback
>>13544391354439 It's commonly used in England, just as I recall the author saying about 'sweets' instead of candy.
Yep, that's what Google said, a few links down. Like I mentioned, learn something new every day!
Good show old chap!
>>13561971356197 >>13562361356236 Tbh I have no idea where I picked that up from, lives in New Zealand and Australia all my life
Holy shit. If this were any cuter, it would've given me a heart attack.
>>13564511356451 Be thankful I did not involve Fluttershy.
That would do it.
i love Twidash so much, and I'd say this is one of the best Twidash fics I've read. It wasn't that thourough, but it didn't need to be. You got everything across in that short of a time, and It was amazing.
So yeah, I'd say second best Twidash fic ever (behind Building Bridges). This will give some of the stories in my favorites on my user page a run for thier money.
Loved it! Few errors such as at one point you said "it will happened eventually" when Rainbow was talking about her concerns.
That was so cute that it turned my blood to syrup. Just a really enjoyable and fun read. Take my thumbs up and virtual pat on the back author; you have warmed my icy heart
The hell is a "yonk"? And how long is it.
Also, this story was so cute it gave you a thumbs, and a a favorite.
Well, I'm off to bed before I wander into another sad story again.
That was an exceptionally heart warming story. It has earned my like, my favorite, and the feature it has. I would love to see a sequel, but it also has the perfect ending. You have made my night, and perhaps my day as well. I shall be watching you.
tl;dr Bravo, good sir, BRAVO!
This was brilliant...I can't even explain how much this touched me. I love Twidash and whenever I read a story with them, it melts my heart. I wish I was able to write romance like this. The ending was beautiful, it made me cry. I don't usually cry when it comes to ship-fics, unless it's The Party Hasn't Ended but; this was just so touching...I couldn't help but cry.
Great story, and all I can give you is a thumbs up, a fav, and a watch. I hope that's enough.
My heart has stopped working.
TwiDash is best ship, by far the cutest
Beautiful just beautiful.
Nice, short and sweet. Definitely a good TwiDash story
abort abort cuteness overload!!! BANG... and crash
That was very sweet. Good job.
I cried. This world needs more love.
Why do I feel like you're one of the few authors of your status who actually takes the time to not only read other people's stories but actually leave a comment. Its really cool that you do.
And a moustache to you, sir, for the best TwiDash ship I've read yet.
well done, a nice, short but touching story and so adorable, felt a little rushed in places including the wrapping up of it, but that in not uncommon with (im assuming) a one shot story like this
also, i am australian (nsw) aswell, and the term yonks does float around not too common but it is still used along with the rest of our slang XD
keep up the great work and hope to see more (maybe even a sequal to this fic maybe?)
Fantastic TwiDash. I'm just sad it couldn't be longer though.
Holy cows. Too cute. This was really just a great read, it made my night. It was totally worth reading. I would love it if there were a sequel, but it would be fine if it ended here; that was the perfect ending. Seemed a little rushed, but if it had gone slower i don't think it would have the same effect.thumbs up, fave from me! You have earned my mustaches.
Beautiful, that is it, take a internet, the only fan fic that tops this for me is Of Harmony & Chaos . Fantastic read thanks for the good feeling I get from this now.
Nice, short and sweet. I admit to laughing out loud when I clicked on the double rainbow link, but I never like to see other media incorporated into a story like that - as I believe someone else said, it distracts you from the story. I didn't actually click on the second link until after I'd finished reading because, frankly, I was expecting Rick Astley's "Never gonna give you up" and I just wouldn't have been able to take the climax seriously if that was the case
Other than that though, this was a good read! Keep them coming
Umm...wow thanks everypony for all the positive feed back Also to those who pointed out flaws in my writing. I'll be sure to take your advice on in the future. Might write some more fics like this If enough people ask for a sequel / epilogue kinda thing, I'll do that, too
My 1st comment ever on this site! That story was SO well written and SO sweet! It was a pleasure to have as my first FIMFanfiction story
ps. i liked the linked media thing, especially for the music, not so much for the video but the added context was great. also a sequal would be awesome but only if you feel there is somthing to add, dont do a sequal for the sake of it
Harsh ending but up to the top with all that love.
yup, plenty of daww in here
>>13582661358266 Happy you feel that way. This site is amazing, and if you ever feel you want to write your own story I'll be happy to help out
Beyond beautiful, though the embedded links leave me feeling like I missed something. Should be described in detail in the work itself.
>>13582631358263This could become one of the best fics I've ever read if you continue it and continue to do it the way it's been done. I meant every word of my previous comment. I really enjoyed this fic, and I look forward to reading more of it and probably anything else you write. Keep it up, and keep 'em coming!
>>13586271358627 And thank you for the support
No problem. This is
>>13586381358638 Oh I see what you did thar.
Also have this one:
One last thing; this made my heart
>>13586731358673 So....many....songs.... Maybe my next story will incorporate a dance track
>>13586791358679This one:(to use)
That was the most heartwarming and Awesome short Twidash shipfic I have read. That was truly amazing and great read. I look forward to any future works of yours.
I'm not going to open the links...
In actual literature, keeping songs and music vague or unspecified as a general rule is better, as the reader is able to fill in the songs frmo their head as they see fit. Personally, I put Ray Charles' "You Don't Know Me" as Twilight's love song for Rainbow Dash.
Anyhoot, all that aside, it was a great and sweet little story.
The story is good, but most of romance in this place are usually the Mane 6. Doesn't it encourage homosexuality? I was thinking, can you remake this one, but maybe Soarin from the Wonderbolts falls for Rainbow Dash and they both love each other? Or maybe Twilight with another nerd. And Canterlot is not full of those obnoxious people. Canterlot is very neat, none of the informal.
But all in all, a very good story, with a good plot.
Looks like I'm tracking another person, huh.
Wow sazura. Great story. I especially love twilight's role in the story, its so her. You nailed it bro. Also, the thing you did with media references with the blue text, that was really cool. Seriously, that. was. cool. Got some good feels from this story.
I went back and read a lot of the other comments. Not sure why people are so opposed to the media references. It isnt really a distraction, you read up until the reference, you go to it, watch it, you come back, and keep reading. I thought it worked excellently, was really cool and I wish it was done more often. As for the song, im glad he referenced to a specific song rather than keeping it vague, for me it was like adding more detail to the scene, my mind wouldn't have been able to set the proper mood without it. I thought this story was excellent. Sigh, if mlp was made for bronies and not young children, then this would have made an excellent episode.
Just simply awesome and completely uplifting. One of the best Twi-Dash shippings I've read! Needed a story like this
"Even the toughest of us have emotions."
I'm sorry, what? I can't help but feel that's rather disingenuous to, I don't know, our entire species?
What a nice little fic, like the equivalent of an eponyephren shot straight into the heart, except it's hot chocholate instead, with cream and marshemallows and all that.
Wow. Beautiful love story. Hope to see more from you. That was brilliant
>>13592191359219 Is the word you're looking for really "disingenuous"? My dictionary defines it as "lacking in sincerity", and how exactly can you lack sincerity to something, much less a species?
Anyway, I really liked this story. One fascinating aspect of it is that you could pretty much cut the ending and one or two sentences before that, and you'd have a classic friendshipping story rather than a romance - which goes to show that this one had quite a bit more thought going into the romantic buildup than the average shipping story. Well done.
A simple, yet beautifully written story. Normally, I am strongly - very strongly - opposed to shipping of any of the Mane 6, but this was so perfectly executed that this story was more than tolerable. I was unsure of reading this story, seeing yet another title, cover, and tags pointing to a stereotypical Twi-Dash ship, but I do not regret reading it in the slightest. I'm glad I read this. I hope to see more from you, shipping or otherwise. Sazura, good job. *Tears up* And the use of that song made it all better than perfect. Great - no, fantastic job.
Awwww! This was very adorable and sweet!
Well done. >>13582631358263 Don't take this the wrong way, but I hope there isn't a sequel, the story is too perfect just the way it is. Continuing it would feel very tacked on to me, but that's just my opinion and may very well not be worth a bucket of horseapples. I do hope to see more of your work in the future though.
This was beautiful, and the song made me shed tears as i read the rest of it.
Oh Celestia....I can't stop all these FEELS.
Amazing fic my friend, made me audibly "D'aww" multiple times, damn TwiDash and making me feel emotions.
Only when well written of course
THIS STORY MAKES MY DICK ROCK HARD.
Wait...... No! No! I take that back! Uh... I don't know Obama!
Well done on this one. Always love a good TwiDash fic. The song featured is great and now a favorite. One of those song that fits perfectly in your life at times. Once again well done on the fic and if you have anymore like this then please share them.
Seems Twilight found the perfect method to seduce Rainbow Dash. No other pony would be able to pull that set of moves off.
That was so sweet, I feel like I need to brush my teeth now
Ending was done way too quickly.
Fleetfoot's a mare.
Made yesterday, already has 94 comments and about 3k views. Bravo :D. Good job on the story, they need more fanfics that don't have the characters going, hey I like you, hey I like you too; and nothing but kisses and sex after that. XD Get's rather annoying after a while, so this was a good story to read. I'll keep this one bookmarked just so I can check you out again for more stories ;P
Beautiful. This is going into my showcase.
I can really relate to Twilight. I have fallen (deep) for my best friend. One could easily compare Twi to me and RD to her, given our personalities and interests.
This story could perfectly apply to our friendship, or at least Twi's feelings.
OMG This was THE best TwiDash shipfic I've ever read I never knew that such works of art could be written in so short a setup, and be so stinking beautiful...Excuse me while I slowly crumble inside as my heart breaks and grows at the same time
Beautiful, cute, awesome, sweet... to many feels.
Good TwiDash is best ponyfiction. Gets all my love, to be certain.
>>13633671363367 That was weird. I was literally just looking at your TwiDash and thank you