i like

here have a pony

Image: http://cdn.derpiboo.ru/thumbs/1200/700/2012/09/18/03_35_38_605_100782__UNOPT__safe_princess_luna_vector_artist_mihaaaa

dun dun dun?

this is...interesting, i'll see where it goes.

"A crisp and spiteful air" was enough to sell me on this story.  

What  I can say?.... It's deep, it's so detailed, and had such a sad atmosphere...

You captured my emotions, and the cliffhanger on the end was nice to keep your readers coming back.

It really is your first attempt?

Congratulations!

Have a thumb up and favorited!

Wow guys. I didn't expect this kind of reception! I'm working on chapter 2 right now and hopefully it won't disappoint!

>>12999541299954 Yes it really is my first attempt. After reading stories such as Within and Without and Don't Let the Sun Catch You Crying, I was inspired to write my own story. I've never really done creative stuff so I was surprised to see that you all liked it so much. And thank you!

>>12992621299262 Thank you. She is beautiful! ''

I applaud you sir, to an excellent beginning to what I'm sure will be an amazing story. Keep up the good writing!

>>13029691302969 Thanks a lot! I think the direction I'm taking should be interesting. So I'm hoping everyone enjoys it. It is my goal not to disappoint!

>>13031041303104

so far so good!

>>13031101303110 Well thank you again. So far chapter 2 is up to 3,000 words and I'm hoping to have it up to 10,000 by the end of the week. Then weekend editing and posting. I would love to hear what you have to say about that part too when it gets uploaded if you wouldn't mind offering your thoughts.

>>13031221303122

10,000 words?! That's awesome, now i have something to look forward to! you'll definitely be getting some feedback from me on chapter 2!

me Gusta...

>>13047571304757 I'm glad you are enjoying it

This story goes to TwiLuna ship, right?

Just, adding to the group TwiLuna, in a folder "Adventures" without addition in "Romance" confused me.

>>13048751304875 Oh I'm sorry. I hope the next chapter will clear up why I put it in the adventure folder. It is going to be a long adventure fic with a romance undertone. I'm still a little new to all this stuff and my friend referred me to the group and said I should add it there. I'm sorry if I did something wrong Can you add it to both?

Wow! I did not know what to expect coming into this story... but dang man, you got something good here!

The scenes are very descriptive. I found myself easily picturing the snow filled field that Twilight came across. Also, that cliffhanger at the end... No spoilers, but that caught me a bit off guard!

Very much looking forward to more!

>>13051821305182 Thanks Morden! I was really trying to be as descriptive as possible so that you guys can see what I see in my head. Glad to know it's working!

Very good! i fully expect that Twilight fans, Luna fans and especially Twiluna fans all across the internet will be on the edge of their seats

The feels in the story remind me of Apotheosis a couple chapters in after Luna understands Twilight is not going to just up and banish her to the moon again.

>>13064201306420 Actually Apotheosis is one of my major inspirations as you will soon see by content. :rarity wink: Needless to say that isn't a very big hint at what's to come at all, but I expect it will take on a similar feel for a part then move drastically away.

Oh that sounds goos I loved apothesis cannot wait for more I'm a twiluna fan and twilight is my favourite character so you sir get a like and a favourite definitely watching keep up the excellent descriptions second chapters gonna be good

Just so you know , I'm studying french and the french in the title should be spelt Fleur-de-Luna if you're referencing Fleur-de-lis. Just a tip is all Unless you meant to spell it wrong...

>>13072871307287 Its actually based on the Santana song Flor d'Luna which is a Spanish offshoot for Moonflower but I decided to mix the French word for black as opposed to the Spanish 'negra' based on a mixture of cultures and a thing my friends and I used to say. So it says Black Moonflower in a mixture of Spanish and French.

>>13072641307264 Thank you so much! I'm glad you have faith in me!

Err, just a pet peeve of mine, but could you use two lines to seperate the paragraphs, please? It makes it easier on the eyes.

>>13074641307464 Oh sure. I'll edit that in when I get back from class at 9. Sorry about that!

>>13074721307472

Thanks, and it's okay.

The Picture drew me in along with a promise of TwiLuna and Adventure which tend to be my favorite Stories. Seeing as you mentioned  Within and Without and Don't Let the Sun Catch You Crying which are my Number 1 and 2 Favorite TwiLuna Stories overall you have a really solid Start here and of course it had to end in an Cliffhanger

tracked and watched

This was a welcome and unexpected find. Good job my friend j

Well now, you have my attention.

I'm done with Chapter one, where is Chapter two?  Seriously though, I enjoyed reading this and can't wait to see what happens in the next chapter.

>>13174611317461 Chapter 2 should be out by wednesday or thursday of this week. I just got hit friday with over the weekend papers and haven't had time to work on it =( But Thursday by the latest!

>>13191271319127  Yay for possible new chapter!

>>13200091320009 Oh it's more than possible. Trust me I'm not going on hiatus or anything! I'm already 5,000 words in to chapter 2 and not stopping now!

I felt it deserved mustache Spike.

When can we expect the next chapter?

I'm eager for more.

>>13398171339817 That depends on when my professors decide to stop throwing loads of work on me. I was hoping to have it out by Thursday but I may require another weekend if this keeps up...

oooooooh, i love long chapters!

>>14723941472394 Well I do hope it does not disappoint. I'm glad to finally give it to everyone.

>>14725301472530

>>14725481472548 It was really cute.

Lot's of world building in this chapter, establishing your own personal canon for Equestria's past.   Not much in the way of story progression, but it was probably necessary to have this little explanation period before the main events of the story kick in anyway.

So yeah.  Keep up the great work, and I'm looking forward to wherever you take this next.

I do like this chapter

I Love this story! Have all my stars! and 's and 's

you can even have a or

Wonderful update. I can't wait for the next chapter.

Wow  so Discord manipulate radiation , and is a mass killer   i want to see the other elements to the news about Celestia. i love this story keep going pleaaaaaaaase

*POSSIBLE SPOILERS*

>>14726651472665 Well there is actually a lot of world building in this story. So I hope you like all of it. From here on, though, it shouldn't be coming as slow as it was from Luna's introspective section. I just wanted to give a little bit of insight into Luna's emotions and past.

>>14727871472787 Will gladly receive all of the above my friend. Can never have enough of them! Thank you!

>>14760031476003 I wanted to make Discord darker than he was. I feel like he is Christopher Nolan's Joker but in God form. So yeahhhh. Also thanks! And I will keep going! *Cue Rocky Music*

Thanks to all for the support. I'm glad you all are enjoying it!

still reading :P

>>14766091476609 Well let me know what you think when you're done haha

“Twilight… My Sister… Celestia… She’s dying…”

Well......................BUCK

Now my story will seem like I'm ripping off of yours.

>>14785631478563 Trust me. Unless you have very specific plot points it won't. Write your own thing. There are lots of stories where Celestia is dying. You could say I'm ripping off of those, but I'm not. Just write what's on your mind and I'm sure it will be great!

*Reads description*

Yes you have captured my interests. Do continue.

And why is this not featured yet?

>>14790751479075 Well as long as those who read it are enjoying it I'm good. Being featured isn't really my goal. But I'm glad you like it!

This story hooked me faster than I expected.

I like the way you write, in detail and easy to imagine.

This is absolutely amazing my friend! Keep up the good work!

This story is very good, and I am interested in what will happen...

Keep up the good work!

>>16433071643307

>>14970811497081

Thanks! Im glad you like it!

This is very good for a first fic. I hope your still working on it Ducky911 because I want more!

>>16805251680525 Don't worry I am. I have the third chapter done except for a few more scrutinizations and minor changes for continuities sake and chapter 4 halfway written!

I will most definitely read this when my head doesn't feel like a truck tire. It's good to know that I at least affected the fandom in one positive way.

Oh yeah, and from what I read in that first paragraph before I started seeing spots, I think I may have released a force far greater than myself.

Also, [Romance][Adventure]...

Image: http://weknowmemes.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/fuck-yeah-story-time.jpg

I'm feckin' excited.

>>17337911733791 Thanks Script! I don't know about being a far greater force, but I do try my best. Hopefully you will enjoy it as much as I have enjoyed writing it.

Just finished reading this chapter, and I gotta say

Image: http://cdn.memegenerator.net/instances/400x/27070999.jpg

Dreamwalking is now canon.

Not that you would care about that, but it's still pretty cool.

>>17718501771850 It is interesting. I enjoyed the fact they acknowledged her role in dreams. But now I wonder if Celestia can appear to someone in consciousness without actually being there... It seems interesting. New fic idea!

>>17721521772152 So many fic ideas just from that one scene!

>>17721521772152 Well the Trojans always respected Apollo because he saw everything, so while I doubt Celestia can randomly peer into the minds of conscious ponies, it wouldn't surprise me to learn that she can see everything outdoors.

hm... not sure about this story, it kinda bothers me that so many of these stories is like the princesses requesting a service and then they have to barge to get them to do it? this isn't a democracy... even in the show whenever they say something everyone just does it without question, even to fight discord, nightmare moon and so on...

on a more personal note, i'm a little bored with the slow pace at places, like you use far to much time to describe tiny unnecessary things, which just feels like it drags out the story... but i don't say it's wrong, many people like stuff like that, i'm just not one of them.

honestly the only reason i even read this is because of the promised twiluna ship which is my OTP. but credit is where credit is due and you write quite well, at least i think so.

>>17828821782882 I can't tell you how much I appreciate getting constructive criticism. I know that the whole Luna requesting thing might not be totally accurate, but I like to think that there is a request rather than a demand as that is how I would like to get the information. And the pace will pick up considerably soon. I just like to take my time. Thank you for the comment. I really do appreciate it.

Sometimes it felt as though Luna asked them about the trip for cough pills.

Celestia. Is. Dying. I think it may be even more important than Discord and others.

But despite that I like how it goes. The scene with Luna and Twilight in the library was really nice.

Spike mumbled, intentionally avoiding the second part of Luna’s query.

“Did you sleep well? I hope I was not an unwelcome guest and that my snoring did not wake you,” Luna replied