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defender2222

Joined August 2012
1,227 followers

Stories (13)

Source

There has always been a little voice in Twilight Sparkle's head, whispering dark musings to her. And until her brother's wedding, she has managed to push those bitter thoughts away and focus on the good. She forgives and forgets and holds onto hope.

But when her friends turn their backs on her and her brother cuts her from his life, Twilight finds herself alone, with only the little voice to comfort her.

And it is through anger and hate that has been repressed for so long that Twilight finds the power to rise up. Harmony and Friendship have only brought her pain and suffering. It is time for her to embrace her dark side. No longer will she worry about what others think. Twilight is going to live her life how SHE chooses: without friends, without family, without love and without harmony. She is going to cut loose, have fun, and screw what others think.

For her friends and family, it will soon become apparent that if they don't find a way to mend the damage they've done to the lavender mare...Twilight Sparkle might be lost to them forever.

Thank you to everyone that got this story as one of the Featured Stories here on the site!

The TvTropes Page can be found here: http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/FanFic/FaithAndDoubt

Cover created by the amazing FerGarcia220

First Published
18th Sep 2012
Last Modified
1st Nov 2012

Comments ( 1,977 )

#1 · Chapter 1 · 83w, 2d ago · · ·

And here is my attempt to do the complete opposite of what I normally do.

One of the biggest parts of this chapter was to make sure I didn't go too dark, too quick, but also not to make the darkness too slow. It would have been real easy to have Twilight snap and be a mass murderer, or for her to wallow in pity and not stand up and fight. I needed a balance and that meant a TON of editing and rewrites.

As always, if you find any errors, please let me know.

#2 · Chapter 1 · 83w, 2d ago · · ·

OOoooohh a dark story of twilight, funny thing though, after the many times she's been shunned and rejected by family/friends

I thought of a story arc  where she becomes malevolent and turns anti-hero esque where in she sides with the main villain at the end of a season (mainle season 3) :pinkiecrazy: -tl;dr-

- will read later :3:scootangel:

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update: just read it, and I can say that  I can damn well relate to twilight's rustled jimmies in this Fic

-this is an awesome fic :moustache:

#3 · Chapter 1 · 83w, 2d ago · · ·

>>1295295

There are no major problems in your fic, apart from perhaps a too fast-paced plot line. Perhaps just explain a tad bit more about Twilight's schizophrenic flip-side personality a bit more. Also, if you need a prereader of sorts, I'd be more than happy to help. Great fic and keep writing! :twilightsmile:

#4 · Chapter 1 · 83w, 2d ago · · ·

I would love to  see her proven right, smack down the changelings, then rub it in everyone's face, that would be comedy gold!:rainbowlaugh:

#5 · Chapter 1 · 83w, 2d ago · · ·

Yay, new Defender fic! MUSTREADMUSTREADMUSTREAD

#6 · Chapter 1 · 83w, 1d ago · · ·

The story gave me feels. This could work as your cover, if you want...(I never drew it; it was done by randompinkie on deviantart)

#7 · Chapter 1 · 83w, 1d ago · · ·

>>1296407

What is happening to Twilight will be explored throughout the story. One of the major plot points is how she allowed herself to get this far.

For those that think she went to quick to darkness (and trust me, this is the begining) I will say only this: The Joker was right...all it takes is One Bad Day.

#8 · Chapter 1 · 83w, 1d ago · · ·

Very, very promising.:pinkiesmile:

#9 · Chapter 1 · 83w, 1d ago · · ·

>>1296578 And Twilight just suffered her bad day, and everyone who caused it will regret it and will wonder when it's too late how they could have been so stupid. :twilightangry2:

#10 · Chapter 1 · 83w, 1d ago · 1 · ·

>>1296634

I have already written the next chapter and I must say that I love writing vengeful Twilight. I have been a actor and one of my first roles was the lead villain in a musical...I can attest to just how FUN it is to let everything go and be bad. When you just don't care anymore...it is like a drug and that is what Twilight is going to go through.

#11 · Chapter 1 · 83w, 1d ago · · 1 ·

Twilight is correct! For the most part. Everypony in the throne room was pretty out of character during that scene. Twilight even brings up a good point in her anger: Celestia didn't trust her regarding Nightmare Moon (of course, that's assuming Celestia wasn't playing her like a chess piece the entire time, and it's hard to imagine she wasn't), but she fails to trust her in Cadence's case.

Her slow descent into madness was a lot of fun to read. I hope there's more writing like this in the rest of the story ... but also action.

But putting aside the setting of time and place, Spike would fit this story concept waaay better. They really fail to give a crap about him sometimes, and he probably struggles to stay in an optimistic frame of mind.

Lookin' forward to more.

#12 · Chapter 1 · 83w, 1d ago · · ·

Have you been watching Doctor Horrible?

This fic has that whendonish feel.

#13 · Chapter 1 · 83w, 1d ago · · ·

>>1296746

Spike will become a major player in this story. Just as I LOATHE Shining Armor, I really enjoy Spike and I have plans for the two of them that will be quite fun.

Not as fun as Evil Twilight, though...remember...the Devil gets the best dance numbers.

#14 · Chapter 1 · 83w, 1d ago · · ·

Is this going to end with Twilight's dark side being surgically removed?

#15 · Chapter 1 · 83w, 1d ago · · ·

>>1296799

*chuckles* No. Believe it or not this story idea came first before The Many Origins of Scootaloo. But I guess I was in a dark mood after some negative reviews and finally decided to write it.

#16 · Chapter 1 · 83w, 1d ago · · ·

Whoa...Equestria is screwed.

I'm loving this. I'm guessing Twilight was still right in this universe and after the Changelings are defeated the others are going to have some much bigger problems...

#17 · Chapter 1 · 83w, 1d ago · · ·

>>1296835

Yes, this isn't an alternate universe one...'Cadence' isn't Cadence (While I do love the one story, I forget its title, where Twilight is wrong but cadence defends her to the rest, I didn't want to go that route). And yeah...there are going to be issues. Big ones. Some very dark secrets are going to be revealed.

#18 · Chapter 1 · 83w, 1d ago · · ·

One more random question,

>>1296640

Wait what? Why isn't it up yet?

#19 · Chapter 1 · 83w, 1d ago · · ·

dont suffer from insanity, enjoy every minut of it! :pinkiecrazy:

#20 · Chapter 1 · 83w, 1d ago · · ·

>>1296876

I haven't finalized it.

I could easily post many chapters right now, but they would not be strong. Stories need to sit, to age and be seasoned. I need to write, then let it sit a day, then edit it, then repeat the process. That allows me to come up with new ideas, to correct things, so on and so forth.

Also, by writing ahead, I can make changes to past chapters as I come up with ideas in later ones without having to do major retcons.

Don't worry, I plan to update this soon...within the next 4 days I would say.

#21 · Chapter 1 · 83w, 1d ago · · ·

>>1296902

Ahh, proceed. You have avoided the Plasma Annihilator, for now.

Also, is it just me but I can hear a Brand New Day playing during the fic.

#22 · Chapter 1 · 83w, 1d ago · · ·

OH please tell me that Twilight rips Chrys in half I would love to see a  bloody start that really sets the mood.... and where did that thought come from I normaly hate gory stories.

#23 · Chapter 1 · 83w, 1d ago · · ·

Tracking this! :twilightangry2:

#24 · Chapter 1 · 83w, 1d ago · · ·

I've already shown my distaste for that particular scene (mostly due to the fact I'm an older sister and I have two older brothers). It was lesson zero all over again. They said they learned their lesson, but it was apperant that they didn't when they brushed it off like it was nothing.  In the show they should be glad that it turned out alright, because this time they are going to feel karma's wrath on them.

(Sorry about any spelling errors that are probably there.)

#25 · Chapter 1 · 83w, 1d ago · · ·

>>1300611

That is 100% my thought. Darth Link's fic did very well in examining it, but he went for the more family-friendly results. Her friends enraged me, Celestia's stupidity annoyed the hell out of me and I HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE Shining Armor so much. I have not seen ANYTHING in the show to prove that he isn't a user who justifies his own poor choices. If you are a fan of his, turn away....I am going to be smacking him with a stick and that stick is named Spike.

Ahem...as I said, Dark Link did very good, but I decided to go darker and ask what would happen if Twilight suddenly snapped and went "Everyone I care about uses me...no more". We've seen her angry and we've seen her go nuts...this is a Twilight that is focused...the most dangerous type of angry there is.

I will leave you with this mere thought: The Joker from 'The Dark Knight' is a VERY big inspiration for what is to come.

Oh yes...there will be blood.

#26 · Chapter 1 · 83w, 1d ago · · ·

>>1300667 Bashing on Shining? Oh I'm really intrested in this fic now.  As far as I recall nopony (exept Applejack if I recall correctly) ever apologized for what they did. So bash away! Hell I'll help!

And joker style Twilight is something I can agree with also.

Finnaly

Oh yes...there will be blood.
I say bring it on.

#27 · Chapter 1 · 83w, 1d ago · · ·

>>1300724

You are correct, and even then it was after they were defeated and it took the QUEEN POINTING OUT HOW STUPID THEY WERE to get any of them to realize just how badly they had treated Twilight. Chrysalis is smarter than the rest of the cast.

I am currently finishing editing chapter 2, and writing chapter 3 (which will probably be broken into multiple parts. I know the begining and the ending of the story, so the middle will be the hard part.  My hope is to get Chapter 2: Something Borrowed posted on Thursday or Friday, then move into a bi-weekly timeline.

#28 · Chapter 1 · 83w, 1d ago · · ·

This story actually made me cry about where it describes her normal response to anger.  That pretty much describes me to a T.  I'm interested in seeing where you go with this.

#29 · Chapter 1 · 83w, 1d ago · · ·

>>1300849

I want to explore the idea of letting go. What happens to a person (or a pony) who has held back for the sake of their friends and family...when they decide that no one truly cares for them and it would be better to just let go.

#30 · Chapter 1 · 83w, 1d ago · · ·

>>1300876 That sounds really interesting.  I want to say something, but I'm afraid it might put too much pressure on you.  If you think that's the case, stop reading now, because I don't want to put a ton of pressure on you and make you stop writing this story.  

(Pressure-y statement starts here)  I'm really looking forward to reading this, especially since the Twilight here sounds so much like me.  I had an epiphany on Sunday.  Not really a good one, but at least now I know.  Anyway, the past couple days have been pretty bad (especially considering that my mental issues were starting to show some improvement).  But the idea of just letting it all go kinda appeals to that darker side of me.  I think I'm far too self-insular (that's not the word, but I can't really communicate the concept I want adequately) to do something like that.  So maybe I can live vicariously through Twilight and have that emotional catharsis.  (Pressure-y statement ends here)

I hope what I had to say didn't put you off writing this (if you read it), because that was not my intention at all.  I just thought you should know how much this story means to me. :twilightsheepish::heart:

#31 · Chapter 1 · 83w, 1d ago · · ·

...wow. The argument is perfectly valid, if self-indulgent in exactly the way people are when hurt.:twilightangry2:

This looks really good-tracking and such.

#32 · Chapter 1 · 83w, 23h ago · · ·

>>1301107

Not at all and I hope you enjoy living through Twilight as she goes wild!

>>1301426

Thanks. I really wanted to get into Twilight's head here, to show how she could arrive at the conclusions she does. When you are upset and frustrated and feeling as if no one as faith in you...you begin to doubt everything. And you can either mope...or let go and rise.

Something is going to rise in the place of Twilight Sparkle and her friends and family better fix things quick if they want to stop it.

#33 · Chapter 1 · 83w, 19h ago · · ·

HOLD UP, HOLD UP, HOLD THE BUCK UP!!!!! An evil Twilight, an EVIL Twilight Sparkle? Are.....you.....your serious right? And Spike joining her along her dark path of darkness and being the villian, or anti-hero (in Spike's case maybe...can you have him kill Rarity? PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASSEEEEEE!!!!!!) This...this chapter made me cry, I shit you not, I'm seriously bawling my eyes out becuase it's so wonderful, so grapic and so darkly true...I....I love every single second of it, I LOVE IT!!!!

Is Twilight really agreeing with Oblivion? Her dark half, and who is also the Element of Non Magic and enemy...huh, that's most certainly new....Oblivion is cold, emoitinless and to the point so it makes sense in adiing Twilight to come towards a darker route....I'm very, very impressed.

I'll be watching, reviewing, reading and getting into a fight with a polor bear to make sure this fic is complete, no matter what! I await the next tdafrk hearted chapter....will she and Spike join with the queen and take over Equeartia? Or will she and Spike betray the queen and destory Equestria themselves with the help of the Dark Elements (Elements of Disharmony) along with the Queen's own army....hmmm....so many choices and views, so very, little time.

Let the decend into darkness and betrayal begin (Ha, made a betrayal joke because of Disloyalty, Element of Betrayal and dark half of Rainbow Dash...get it?) :rainbowlaugh:

Also, a few errors here and there, the thing that bugged me the most is you did not calize the e on Elements of and h on Harmony....so please be sure to fix that my friend.

#34 · Chapter 1 · 83w, 19h ago · · ·

>>1296529 That has to be the most bad ass and darkest pic of Twilight Sprakle I have ever seen....bravo dear sire/madam for finding it and to the creator for making the leader of the Elements of Harmony and Element of Magic truly allow darkness to consume her entire body, mind and soul.....very impressive.

#35 · Chapter 1 · 83w, 18h ago · · ·

>>1302785

I can't reveal too much, as it will ruin all my plans, I will only say that Oblivion does not play a role in this story (never even heard of Oblivion until you brought it up).

But trust me...I have plans and have have a basic guideline to follow for Act 1, as I call it...Act 2 I know almost all the key pieces...the the struggle will be getting from Act 1 to Act 2

Thanks for the review.

#36 · Chapter 1 · 83w, 18h ago · · ·

>>1303002 Yeah, not suprised...it's funny how the Dark Elements (Elements of Disharmony) were in the cartoon episodes themselves in Return of Harmony part one and two and no one has notice them....am I the only one who noticed the dark halves of the Mane Six while  watching those two episodes? :rainbowlaugh::unsuresweetie:

And I trust you, got an amazing feeling for this story :pinkiehappy: This is going to be a descend into darkness that will never be forgotton!

And never a problem.

Oblivion: Element of Non Magic and dark half to Twilight Sparkle, she is cold, cruel and completely emotionless, perfering to be blunt and in many cases rude to get her point across, has a horn but will never use magic unless ordered to by only Hatred alone.

Bio: If there is one thing Oblivion can't stand more then her time being wasted, it's reading.

She, unlike her bearer Twilight Sparkle, would love to burn evey book ever created in the land and beyond as she has done when the Dark Elements destoryed Equestria, centuries ago. She is friends with Hatred, but also wishes for her to be killed so that Sorrow could be leader.

If you wish to know of the other five, let me know, I have one for all of them...and I did not create them, Hasbro did...I just gave them names and elements suitable to them, hoping many fans can embrace them as I have.

#37 · Chapter 1 · 83w, 18h ago · · ·

>>1303049

I find it interesting that Oblivion sounds like the polar opposite of the Twilight I am creating. My Twilight is a mix of Twilight, Trixie and the Joker.

#38 · Chapter 1 · 83w, 18h ago · · ·

>>1303068 Indeed :rainbowlaugh: And I really enjoy the Twilight you are creating but Oblivion  is an enemy of Twlight Sparkle so even if Twilight would be consumed by her own darkness, her dark half would never help her...she would kill her then because she is the evil copy of Twilight destroy all in her path. ...in a very emotionless way.

This is going to be fun.

#39 · Chapter 2 · 83w, 7m ago · 5 · ·

Here is our first meeting with the new and improved Twilight.  The inspiration for her entrance was, of course, the great entrance by The Joker in The Dark Knight. I took much of his swagger and mocking and used it to help inspire Twilight's brash welcome. I decided to have her be a bit drunk to help justify her calling everyone out so soon; don't worry though, now that she has a taste of being assertive she won't need booze as a crutch.

I always find it interesting that Twilight is underestimated. She is very talented and I think it is her lack of confidence is the main reason characters write her off. That said, I knew there was simply no way she could beat Celestia in a fair fight...so she had to go for the cheap shot and then focus on her main target.

Twilight's family...how I loathe them. Shining is a classic user and because we've never even seen her with her parents they have become absentee family. I have plans for them too and it will be fun to explore the mother and father who gave up their daughter to a princess.

There are so many plot holes I got to call out in this chapter on how the characters acted...it was almost a blessing because it allowed me to really focus on how stupid all of Twilight's family and friends had acted.

#40 · Chapter 1 · 82w, 6d ago · · ·

Evil Twilight is best Twilight. You can take the story veeerrrry far if you do it right.

Only a few typo's here and there, but one thing you need to correct is how you present thought process in prose. Instead of using apostrophes to mark the beginning and end of Twilight's thoughts, you might want to consider using italics. Although I hate how FimFiction presents different font styles when writing a story, italics just make thought process more streamlined. Another thing is your use of ellipses (dot dot dot's). If you add a space after each use, and before the next word, it will make the prose prettier.

Besides that, wonderful story so far. Keep up the good work!

#41 · Chapter 2 · 82w, 6d ago · · ·

I love this. Please continue.

#42 · Chapter 2 · 82w, 6d ago · · ·

I really like this.:twilightsmile:

#43 · Chapter 2 · 82w, 6d ago · 3 · ·

That's... Kinda hilarious, actually. The villain (dying, possibly) asks the hero's mentor how they screwed up so badly...

And the mentor has no answer.

#45 · Chapter 2 · 82w, 6d ago · · ·

Brilliant! I'm tracking this.

#46 · Chapter 2 · 82w, 6d ago · · ·

Perfect Joker line, also, what happened to Spike? More importantly, why did Twillight not just kill the Queen? So the hero is now the villian, huh? Very nice, Dark Twilight is perfect.....in every way, shape and form. So much darkness, so little time......wonder if Derpy will be in this? And Sorrow!!!! Bad ass that you got her in this chapter for a second. A drunk Twilight? Shit, share it with Spike and then count me in!:pinkiehappy: Can't wait for the next one...and I though Celstria was truly blind....is she not?

#47 · Chapter 2 · 82w, 6d ago · · ·

>>1307621

Spike will appear in the next chapter (or, to put it better, he will have lines next chapter). Right now I think Twilight is an anti-hero. She still wanted to defeat a being that was threatening Equestria, but she did it for herself, not her friends. Celestia was also blinded, not actually made blind. A touch too dark to go to that right away.

#48 · Chapter 2 · 82w, 6d ago · · ·

>>1307657 Ah, alright then....well astleast he be in it. And true, very true.....Anti-heroes are always misunderstood....poor dark Twilight. Really, huh...how the hay did I miss that? :rainbowlaugh:

#49 · Chapter 2 · 82w, 6d ago · · ·

I really love stories that explores Twilight's psyche, especially in a more grimdark fashion. With her brain and power, it is only natural to see a darker development in character.

I'm excited to see the further progression and how her friends and family will react to this darker development.

#50 · Chapter 2 · 82w, 6d ago · · ·

There is no hope for Twilight now, her soul has fallen to hatred from which there is no escape, everyone around her screwed up big time. :eeyup:

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