And here is my attempt to do the complete opposite of what I normally do.

One of the biggest parts of this chapter was to make sure I didn't go too dark, too quick, but also not to make the darkness too slow. It would have been real easy to have Twilight snap and be a mass murderer, or for her to wallow in pity and not stand up and fight. I needed a balance and that meant a TON of editing and rewrites.

As always, if you find any errors, please let me know.

OOoooohh a dark story of twilight, funny thing though, after the many times she's been shunned and rejected by family/friends

I thought of a story arc  where she becomes malevolent and turns anti-hero esque where in she sides with the main villain at the end of a season (mainle season 3) -tl;dr-

- will read later :3

-----------------------------------------------------

update: just read it, and I can say that  I can damn well relate to twilight's rustled jimmies in this Fic

-this is an awesome fic

>>12952951295295

There are no major problems in your fic, apart from perhaps a too fast-paced plot line. Perhaps just explain a tad bit more about Twilight's schizophrenic flip-side personality a bit more. Also, if you need a prereader of sorts, I'd be more than happy to help. Great fic and keep writing!

I would love to  see her proven right, smack down the changelings, then rub it in everyone's face, that would be comedy gold!

Yay, new Defender fic! MUSTREADMUSTREADMUSTREAD

The story gave me feels. This could work as your cover, if you want...(I never drew it; it was done by randompinkie on deviantart)

Image: http://fc00.deviantart.net/fs71/f/2012/054/5/c/evil_twilight_sparkle_by_randompinkpie-d4q7fwg.jpg

>>12964071296407

What is happening to Twilight will be explored throughout the story. One of the major plot points is how she allowed herself to get this far.

For those that think she went to quick to darkness (and trust me, this is the begining) I will say only this: The Joker was right...all it takes is One Bad Day.

Very, very promising.

>>12965781296578 And Twilight just suffered her bad day, and everyone who caused it will regret it and will wonder when it's too late how they could have been so stupid.

>>12966341296634

I have already written the next chapter and I must say that I love writing vengeful Twilight. I have been a actor and one of my first roles was the lead villain in a musical...I can attest to just how FUN it is to let everything go and be bad. When you just don't care anymore...it is like a drug and that is what Twilight is going to go through.

Twilight is correct! For the most part. Everypony in the throne room was pretty out of character during that scene. Twilight even brings up a good point in her anger: Celestia didn't trust her regarding Nightmare Moon (of course, that's assuming Celestia wasn't playing her like a chess piece the entire time, and it's hard to imagine she wasn't), but she fails to trust her in Cadence's case.

Her slow descent into madness was a lot of fun to read. I hope there's more writing like this in the rest of the story ... but also action.

But putting aside the setting of time and place, Spike would fit this story concept waaay better. They really fail to give a crap about him sometimes, and he probably struggles to stay in an optimistic frame of mind.

Lookin' forward to more.

Have you been watching Doctor Horrible?

This fic has that whendonish feel.

>>12967461296746

Spike will become a major player in this story. Just as I LOATHE Shining Armor, I really enjoy Spike and I have plans for the two of them that will be quite fun.

Not as fun as Evil Twilight, though...remember...the Devil gets the best dance numbers.

Is this going to end with Twilight's dark side being surgically removed?

>>12967991296799

*chuckles* No. Believe it or not this story idea came first before The Many Origins of Scootaloo. But I guess I was in a dark mood after some negative reviews and finally decided to write it.

Whoa...Equestria is screwed.

I'm loving this. I'm guessing Twilight was still right in this universe and after the Changelings are defeated the others are going to have some much bigger problems...

>>12968351296835

Yes, this isn't an alternate universe one...'Cadence' isn't Cadence (While I do love the one story, I forget its title, where Twilight is wrong but cadence defends her to the rest, I didn't want to go that route). And yeah...there are going to be issues. Big ones. Some very dark secrets are going to be revealed.

One more random question,

>>12966401296640

Wait what? Why isn't it up yet?

dont suffer from insanity, enjoy every minut of it!

>>12968761296876

I haven't finalized it.

I could easily post many chapters right now, but they would not be strong. Stories need to sit, to age and be seasoned. I need to write, then let it sit a day, then edit it, then repeat the process. That allows me to come up with new ideas, to correct things, so on and so forth.

Also, by writing ahead, I can make changes to past chapters as I come up with ideas in later ones without having to do major retcons.

Don't worry, I plan to update this soon...within the next 4 days I would say.

>>12969021296902

Ahh, proceed. You have avoided the Plasma Annihilator, for now.

Also, is it just me but I can hear a Brand New Day playing during the fic.

OH please tell me that Twilight rips Chrys in half I would love to see a  bloody start that really sets the mood.... and where did that thought come from I normaly hate gory stories.

Tracking this!

I've already shown my distaste for that particular scene (mostly due to the fact I'm an older sister and I have two older brothers). It was lesson zero all over again. They said they learned their lesson, but it was apperant that they didn't when they brushed it off like it was nothing.  In the show they should be glad that it turned out alright, because this time they are going to feel karma's wrath on them.

(Sorry about any spelling errors that are probably there.)

>>13006111300611

That is 100% my thought. Darth Link's fic did very well in examining it, but he went for the more family-friendly results. Her friends enraged me, Celestia's stupidity annoyed the hell out of me and I HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE Shining Armor so much. I have not seen ANYTHING in the show to prove that he isn't a user who justifies his own poor choices. If you are a fan of his, turn away....I am going to be smacking him with a stick and that stick is named Spike.

Ahem...as I said, Dark Link did very good, but I decided to go darker and ask what would happen if Twilight suddenly snapped and went "Everyone I care about uses me...no more". We've seen her angry and we've seen her go nuts...this is a Twilight that is focused...the most dangerous type of angry there is.

I will leave you with this mere thought: The Joker from 'The Dark Knight' is a VERY big inspiration for what is to come.

Oh yes...there will be blood.

>>13006671300667 Bashing on Shining? Oh I'm really intrested in this fic now.  As far as I recall nopony (exept Applejack if I recall correctly) ever apologized for what they did. So bash away! Hell I'll help!

And joker style Twilight is something I can agree with also.

Finnaly

Oh yes...there will be blood.

>>13007241300724

You are correct, and even then it was after they were defeated and it took the QUEEN POINTING OUT HOW STUPID THEY WERE to get any of them to realize just how badly they had treated Twilight. Chrysalis is smarter than the rest of the cast.

I am currently finishing editing chapter 2, and writing chapter 3 (which will probably be broken into multiple parts. I know the begining and the ending of the story, so the middle will be the hard part.  My hope is to get Chapter 2: Something Borrowed posted on Thursday or Friday, then move into a bi-weekly timeline.

This story actually made me cry about where it describes her normal response to anger.  That pretty much describes me to a T.  I'm interested in seeing where you go with this.

>>13008491300849

I want to explore the idea of letting go. What happens to a person (or a pony) who has held back for the sake of their friends and family...when they decide that no one truly cares for them and it would be better to just let go.

>>13008761300876 That sounds really interesting.  I want to say something, but I'm afraid it might put too much pressure on you.  If you think that's the case, stop reading now, because I don't want to put a ton of pressure on you and make you stop writing this story.  

(Pressure-y statement starts here)  I'm really looking forward to reading this, especially since the Twilight here sounds so much like me.  I had an epiphany on Sunday.  Not really a good one, but at least now I know.  Anyway, the past couple days have been pretty bad (especially considering that my mental issues were starting to show some improvement).  But the idea of just letting it all go kinda appeals to that darker side of me.  I think I'm far too self-insular (that's not the word, but I can't really communicate the concept I want adequately) to do something like that.  So maybe I can live vicariously through Twilight and have that emotional catharsis.  (Pressure-y statement ends here)

I hope what I had to say didn't put you off writing this (if you read it), because that was not my intention at all.  I just thought you should know how much this story means to me.

...wow. The argument is perfectly valid, if self-indulgent in exactly the way people are when hurt.

This looks really good-tracking and such.

>>13011071301107

Not at all and I hope you enjoy living through Twilight as she goes wild!

>>13014261301426

Thanks. I really wanted to get into Twilight's head here, to show how she could arrive at the conclusions she does. When you are upset and frustrated and feeling as if no one as faith in you...you begin to doubt everything. And you can either mope...or let go and rise.

Something is going to rise in the place of Twilight Sparkle and her friends and family better fix things quick if they want to stop it.

HOLD UP, HOLD UP, HOLD THE BUCK UP!!!!! An evil Twilight, an EVIL Twilight Sparkle? Are.....you.....your serious right? And Spike joining her along her dark path of darkness and being the villian, or anti-hero (in Spike's case maybe...can you have him kill Rarity? PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASSEEEEEE!!!!!!) This...this chapter made me cry, I shit you not, I'm seriously bawling my eyes out becuase it's so wonderful, so grapic and so darkly true...I....I love every single second of it, I LOVE IT!!!!

Is Twilight really agreeing with Oblivion? Her dark half, and who is also the Element of Non Magic and enemy...huh, that's most certainly new....Oblivion is cold, emoitinless and to the point so it makes sense in adiing Twilight to come towards a darker route....I'm very, very impressed.

I'll be watching, reviewing, reading and getting into a fight with a polor bear to make sure this fic is complete, no matter what! I await the next tdafrk hearted chapter....will she and Spike join with the queen and take over Equeartia? Or will she and Spike betray the queen and destory Equestria themselves with the help of the Dark Elements (Elements of Disharmony) along with the Queen's own army....hmmm....so many choices and views, so very, little time.

Let the decend into darkness and betrayal begin (Ha, made a betrayal joke because of Disloyalty, Element of Betrayal and dark half of Rainbow Dash...get it?)

Also, a few errors here and there, the thing that bugged me the most is you did not calize the e on Elements of and h on Harmony....so please be sure to fix that my friend.

>>12965291296529 That has to be the most bad ass and darkest pic of Twilight Sprakle I have ever seen....bravo dear sire/madam for finding it and to the creator for making the leader of the Elements of Harmony and Element of Magic truly allow darkness to consume her entire body, mind and soul.....very impressive.

>>13027851302785

I can't reveal too much, as it will ruin all my plans, I will only say that Oblivion does not play a role in this story (never even heard of Oblivion until you brought it up).

But trust me...I have plans and have have a basic guideline to follow for Act 1, as I call it...Act 2 I know almost all the key pieces...the the struggle will be getting from Act 1 to Act 2

Thanks for the review.

>>13030021303002 Yeah, not suprised...it's funny how the Dark Elements (Elements of Disharmony) were in the cartoon episodes themselves in Return of Harmony part one and two and no one has notice them....am I the only one who noticed the dark halves of the Mane Six while  watching those two episodes?

And I trust you, got an amazing feeling for this story This is going to be a descend into darkness that will never be forgotton!

And never a problem.

Oblivion: Element of Non Magic and dark half to Twilight Sparkle, she is cold, cruel and completely emotionless, perfering to be blunt and in many cases rude to get her point across, has a horn but will never use magic unless ordered to by only Hatred alone.

Bio: If there is one thing Oblivion can't stand more then her time being wasted, it's reading.

She, unlike her bearer Twilight Sparkle, would love to burn evey book ever created in the land and beyond as she has done when the Dark Elements destoryed Equestria, centuries ago. She is friends with Hatred, but also wishes for her to be killed so that Sorrow could be leader.

If you wish to know of the other five, let me know, I have one for all of them...and I did not create them, Hasbro did...I just gave them names and elements suitable to them, hoping many fans can embrace them as I have.

>>13030491303049

I find it interesting that Oblivion sounds like the polar opposite of the Twilight I am creating. My Twilight is a mix of Twilight, Trixie and the Joker.

>>13030681303068 Indeed And I really enjoy the Twilight you are creating but Oblivion  is an enemy of Twlight Sparkle so even if Twilight would be consumed by her own darkness, her dark half would never help her...she would kill her then because she is the evil copy of Twilight destroy all in her path. ...in a very emotionless way.

This is going to be fun.

Image: http://www.straferight.com/forums/attachments/gaming-general/20676d1341209060-amazon-summer-2012-game-sale-joker11_and_here_we_go-s259x194-138013-580.jpg

Here is our first meeting with the new and improved Twilight.  The inspiration for her entrance was, of course, the great entrance by The Joker in The Dark Knight. I took much of his swagger and mocking and used it to help inspire Twilight's brash welcome. I decided to have her be a bit drunk to help justify her calling everyone out so soon; don't worry though, now that she has a taste of being assertive she won't need booze as a crutch.

I always find it interesting that Twilight is underestimated. She is very talented and I think it is her lack of confidence is the main reason characters write her off. That said, I knew there was simply no way she could beat Celestia in a fair fight...so she had to go for the cheap shot and then focus on her main target.

Twilight's family...how I loathe them. Shining is a classic user and because we've never even seen her with her parents they have become absentee family. I have plans for them too and it will be fun to explore the mother and father who gave up their daughter to a princess.

There are so many plot holes I got to call out in this chapter on how the characters acted...it was almost a blessing because it allowed me to really focus on how stupid all of Twilight's family and friends had acted.

Evil Twilight is best Twilight. You can take the story veeerrrry far if you do it right.

Only a few typo's here and there, but one thing you need to correct is how you present thought process in prose. Instead of using apostrophes to mark the beginning and end of Twilight's thoughts, you might want to consider using italics. Although I hate how FimFiction presents different font styles when writing a story, italics just make thought process more streamlined. Another thing is your use of ellipses (dot dot dot's). If you add a space after each use, and before the next word, it will make the prose prettier.

Besides that, wonderful story so far. Keep up the good work!

I love this. Please continue.

I really like this.

That's... Kinda hilarious, actually. The villain (dying, possibly) asks the hero's mentor how they screwed up so badly...

And the mentor has no answer.

Brilliant! I'm tracking this.

Perfect Joker line, also, what happened to Spike? More importantly, why did Twillight not just kill the Queen? So the hero is now the villian, huh? Very nice, Dark Twilight is perfect.....in every way, shape and form. So much darkness, so little time......wonder if Derpy will be in this? And Sorrow!!!! Bad ass that you got her in this chapter for a second. A drunk Twilight? Shit, share it with Spike and then count me in! Can't wait for the next one...and I though Celstria was truly blind....is she not?

>>13076211307621

Spike will appear in the next chapter (or, to put it better, he will have lines next chapter). Right now I think Twilight is an anti-hero. She still wanted to defeat a being that was threatening Equestria, but she did it for herself, not her friends. Celestia was also blinded, not actually made blind. A touch too dark to go to that right away.

>>13076571307657 Ah, alright then....well astleast he be in it. And true, very true.....Anti-heroes are always misunderstood....poor dark Twilight. Really, huh...how the hay did I miss that?

I really love stories that explores Twilight's psyche, especially in a more grimdark fashion. With her brain and power, it is only natural to see a darker development in character.

I'm excited to see the further progression and how her friends and family will react to this darker development.

There is no hope for Twilight now, her soul has fallen to hatred from which there is no escape, everyone around her screwed up big time.

>>13076981307698

And strangely enough, I think I just hit upon what story I will do after 'The Many Secret Origins of Scootaloo" that will be the opposite of this: Twilight, through means I won't go into (will ruin the surprise!), is given a great power to DEFEAT Chrysalis and becomes a magnificent hero.

OH GOD, YOU NEED TO UPDATE THIS SOON. THIS STORY HAS ALL MY THUMBS, ALL OF THEM

It is not that Twilight alwais gave and her friends alwais take, Applejack for example was also helping everypony and refused to take anythink in exchange, but I must agree that considering what Twilight did and how many times she was right, she deserved more trust and respect.

So I m on Twilight side, go Twilight and get your revange, lay everythink out and teach your mentor and your friends a lesson they would not forget.

>>13077261307726

And you just hit an important fact right on the head: It wasn't all bad.

Twilight is not thinking clearly and is focusing on the negative, which is leading her down a dark and powerful path.

Fear is the path to the dark side. Fear leads to anger, anger leads to hate...hate leads to suffering.

But there were good times and I will be exploring just what is going on in her head and what her friends and family most do (I will only say that things are not as they appear when it comes to Twilight Sparkle...)

So. Twilight is now awesome.

I approve.

LET THEM BURN!

Cheers

GM

Finallly!

I was so mad at the last episodes, but I wouldn't write about it since I can't write for toffee.

Now Twilight can get her revenge!

How about you add some Chaos?

Image: http://www.google.com/imgres?hl=en&sa=X&sout=0&tbm=isch&prmd=imvns&tbnid=kWfW7z8O1NatUM:&imgrefurl=http://www.fimfiction.net/story/816/The-Mysterious-Misadventures-of-Twilight%27s-Mish-Moshed-Mind!&docid=uqGzK2TJ3WqxKM&imgurl=http://img.ponibooru.org/_images/5a8bbba0f05100e19897a388237fdc02/19353%252520-%252520artist%25253Ascherzo%252520colorist%25253Aanon%252520corrupt%252520evil%252520Nightmare_Moon%252520nightmare_star%252520shadow_sparkle%252520twilight_sparkle.png&w=800&h=845&ei=MB5bUKTLM-_2mAWcqoDoDQ&zoom=1&iact=hc&vpx=88&vpy=123&dur=44&hovh=231&hovw=218&tx=138&ty=131&sig=114600650403590862953&page=1&tbnh=119&tbnw=113&start=0&ndsp=21&ved=1t:429,r:0,s:0,i:73&biw=1252&bih=585

Image: http://www.google.com/imgres?hl=en&sa=X&sout=0&tbm=isch&prmd=imvns&tbnid=a0YlMjbTdJANNM:&imgrefurl=http://japplin.deviantart.com/art/Evil-Twilight-Sparkle-304527882&docid=FTwGVEhv0ieIIM&imgurl=http://www.deviantart.com/download/304527882/evil_twilight_sparkle_by_japplin-d51b37u.jpg&w=224&h=225&ei=MB5bUKTLM-_2mAWcqoDoDQ&zoom=1&iact=hc&vpx=109&vpy=4&dur=1620&hovh=180&hovw=179&tx=139&ty=134&sig=114600650403590862953&page=2&tbnh=128&tbnw=116&start=21&ndsp=27&ved=1t:429,r:13,s:21,i:186&biw=1252&bih=585

quick question, will discord be appering any where in this story? becasue by the look of things twilight will be spreading quite alot of distruction, and with that comes chaos, thus possibly freeing him.

also they would make a awesome team

Love it. Always enjoy seeing a slightly twisted story. After all, all it takes is "One. Little. Push." Right?

I like the new and imporoved Twilight, the way how everyone treat her during the wedding was very harsh, and even if her action about calling evil evil evil were illogical and bad, it was justified by desperation, she felt alown, no help and trust from her friends.

But whats more, after they defeated changelings ( love nuclear bomb ). her friends and Celestia did not appologice as they should, and what Celestia said to her to follow her instincts, great moral, considering that she and Twilight friends do not trust Twilight instincts.

I like this story because Twilight get to show everyone how blind they were, how they treat her, and finaly Celestia and everyone will want to beg Twilight to forgive tham.

But the best part was that Queen Chrysalis, the master in cunning , tricks and lies, who was a strong ruler who would not hessitate to do bad thinks to lead her Kingdom and get food for her subjects, even she fell bad for Twilight, the Queen of tricker was practicaly blaming Celestia for doing somethink, brainwash or torture Twilight she would never do herself even to her enemys, to make Twilight the Joker/Bat Mare.

>>13078651307865

Even Chrysalis knows that ponies are not suppose to be like Twilight and that scared the hell out of her.

>>13078201307820

No Discord...but there will be other characters waiting in the wings...and I can't say any more than that.

>>13078791307879

Yes, I know, and I can not wait for new chapter, how long we need to wait for it to come ?

Ah yes miss OP sparkles back bitches and its time to buck shit up YAAAAAAAAA

Moar please

Only Teen? I was expecting homicidal Twilight.

>>13081801308180

Nah...this is dark Twilight, not homicidal killer Twilight.

Besides...death is too quick.

You conveyed rage really well. Very well.

...

Wow.

Dark Twilight is best Twilight. Let's face it, since 'Lesson Zero' we all knew it was just a matter of time before she went of the deep end

Seriously enjoyed this chapter and I'm eagerly awaiting moar.

On the one hand, this is awesome. On the other, I think this might be a little more personal than you're letting on.

For example, Shinning probably didn't exist until they started planning this episode, so while things can be inferred from him not being mentioned(my personal favorite is that Twilight was hiding his existence from Rarity) it's kind of harsh to make those kinds of judgments on him from such a brief appearance and lack of references  to him in previous episodes.

This goes even more so for Twilight's parents. Twilight has obviously been living an adult, mature (or as mature as any of these characters are), and independent life for the entirety of the show, and before that she was living at the castle as the Princess' personal protege'. Calling them "absentee parents" just seems uncalled for.

That said, my only real qualm with the actual chapter is Twilight's drinking. Every time you brought up the flask or whatever it just threw everything off for me.

Other than that, every other bit of her behavior is pretty much well explained by, "she's only focusing on the negatives"

Also...

And strangely enough, I think I just hit upon what story I will do after 'The Many Secret Origins of Scootaloo" that will be the opposite of this: Twilight, through means I won't go into (will ruin the surprise!), is given a great power to DEFEAT Chrysalis and becomes a magnificent hero.

...seriously?

This is so wonderfully screwed up.

She...she did out on purpose.

I have to see how this ends, but you scare me, in a... good way?

Yay! Update!

*reads from start to finish*

Image: http://cdn.memegenerator.net/instances/400x/24423593.jpg

Twilight Sparkle with Trixie's ego and the Joker's Mental State has left me in awe. Good Job!

Also...

The Changelings overhead paused in their assault, letting out their own cries as if they were being sliced apart but thousands of hot swords.

Please fix... Please?

Oh, this is positively delicious. Particularly how everyone's reactions slowly shift from anger, shame, and disgust, to fear, sorrow, and regret. Especially when Celestia sees the Soul Shield and it hits her just how far things have sunk- it's that moment of dawning comprehension that I live for.

>>13085141308514

The drinking was only added to help explain her sudden dark behavior. Think of it as purely liquid courage.

And yes, seriously. All I will say is no evil shall escape her sight.

>>13086781308678

And it will only get worse as it sinks in just how far Twilight has sunk and just how much damage they have done

This does not bode well.

Good luck on.

You know you fucked up badly when the villan is asking what in the hell you did to them.

Btw I am glad that you keep with the changling queen in disguise thing...makes what happened a lot worse for them.

A dark twilight fic with more mad and anger and less lets kill everypony I am intrigued and i would like to see more

Image: http://www.motifake.com/procrastination-excused-compounded-memory-age-tomorrow-demotivational-posters-112294.html

>>13104411310441

Yeah, if people are hoping for mass murder, they are sadly mistaken and should leave now. This will be a journey through darkness, angst, and sadness. But most of all, doubt.

Mark my words...pay attention to Doubt.

This is a dark story that I'm interested it and would love to see more of keep up the good work sir you have my view and if i enjoy the next chapter my like as well the reason I am not replying is the button is screwing with me

Holy shit dude...

Where's the tragedy tag??

This is fucking awesome. Keep it up.

>>13117391311739

I don't know if I would call this a tragedy...maybe for the others by Twilight is enjoying her new found darkside. If enough people think it needs a tragedy tag I will add it though.

My god...

The hate :, the fear, the anger and the sweet after taste it leaves afterward...  I can practically feel them

welp. this proves to me (and to others as well) how much of a good writer you are :D

-please continue :3 MOAAARRRR

Having reread this chapter multiple times over the past 24 hours (it's simply that good), there's something I've noticed. No clue if this is intentional or not, and I don't claim to be an expert on psychological diseases, but you seem to have written Twilight as having legitimate depression issues (voice in her head that chews on her with her every move), and/or with Impostor's Syndrome (the inability to internalize one's own accomplishments, thus feeling undeserving of any praise that is given (which would explain Lesson Zero, and her idea that she'll be punished for not writing a letter, despite having become a National Hero and a legend by defeating Nightmare Moon and Discord, respectively)).

Again, no clue if this is intentional, or even if it means anything at all, but I'm even more intrigued now. If she were really and legitimately sick, it would lend even more likelihood to her decision to let go, and makes the mistakes made by the others all the more weighty.

I also like how you've made it abundantly clear that no one character is entirely at fault- Twilight focusing entirely on the bad, and the others for what they did and said, all ties together into what has happened. It could have been simple to just make this entire fic a round of Shining/Cadence bashing (and considering your hatred for Shining, I'm even more proud that it isn't). I love stuff that doesn't just go the easy route.

Finally, I'm also left curious as to what direction Twilight's going to go with her newfound self-perceived freedom. Cupcakes-style serial killing? General hedonism? Laying waste to the land, All-Shall-Love-Me-And-Despair style? I doubt you'll answer this question, but I eagerly await the next chapter! Kudos!

>>13137241313724

You are hitting alot of nails on the head. My goal was that this would not be a 'Twilight just snaps' story. This is a story about someone who has had alot of pressure placed on them and over the years allowed it to cause mental issues and what happens when those issues finally burst forth. I hold that the Twilight we know is not the real Twilight...the Twilight everyone sees is a creation, based on what Twilight THINKS the world wants he to be. Now, we are going to see that go in full reverse...while the true Twilight lies somewhere inbetween.

The blame is to be passed to everyone, including Twilight. The idea is that, had just one character taken a different route, none of this would have happened. But they all played their parts in bringing us to this point.

I will only say about the direction that this will not be a murder-spree fic. I am more interesting in exploring internal pain and how it affects characters than having Twilight slash people up.

I wanted to just ask, because I am curious...what do you guys think of the quotes? Are they good or bad? Do they fit the story well? Should I continue with them?

i'm rather scared of this twilight, the path she is on can be very very difficult to get off of. i hope spike hasn't gotten her hatred i could only imagine that his mother figure hating him would be bad for his development. so is this twilight only angry at people who she percieves has wronged her? i hope she doesn't go after derpy.

>>13170141317014

Correct. She isn't a berserker or a Red Lantern. She is only looking at others that she knows and seeing only the negative. As such, those she has not met or has not had major interactions with are not her enemy.

>>13166181316618

Keep the quotes, they do add a bit to the atmosphere when read again after a chapter.

First, my thanks to Akmentop for prereading the chapter.

And here we have the fall out from Twilight's defeat of Chrysalis. For those of you that have never had a loved one injured and possibly dying in a hospital...emotions run very high. It is easy to say things you never would and to react in the cruelest of ways. Pain and guilt are funny things.

I wanted to establish here a bit more about Twilight and how others see her versus her friends and family. Twilight, by all accounts, should be one of the most famous ponies in Equestria. Ignoring all the times she saved the world, the fact alone that the ruler of the country selected her as her student should be enough to get tongues waging.  The idea that Twilight never puts on airs speaks to her personality...and that of her friends.

Finally, the Dragon Egg Test. I always found it odd that they would use that test for CHILDREN and yet Twilight is the only one with a dragon...and thus I decided to make it Equestria's version of the Kobayashi Maru. It was designed to be failed...but Twilight did the impossible and succeed.

Oh shit, Spike's gonna rip Shining a brand new asshole!

You update this quick as fuck , you tease! How dare you leave us with such a tantalizing cliff-hanger!

I am really loving this! And woo, Luna scolding them all. Epic.

More, now!

And to be fair, Kirk cheated in the Kobayashi whereas Twilight played entirely within the rules.

Cheers

GM

PS: Second! It's the new first! :D

I was just about to start re-reading this and saw the third chapter and my comment how DARE you leave us with cliffhanger you had better update again soon or else *pulls out nuclear powered chainsaw*

"Fear leads to anger, anger leads to hate, hate.. to suffering"

I love your quick updates.

I love this story

I can't wait for Spike to kick Shining Armor's ass

ONWARD! MOAR

>>13184311318431 Well that depends on whether or not you view the Sonic Rainboom as cheating since Twilight actually gave up just before the Rainboom hit and caused her magic to go all blasitic.

>>13184921318492 Eh...the Rainboom didn't magically grant her power, it just unlocked that which lay beneath. I suppose you could argue that the Rainboom functioned as a code, much like in the Kobayashi.

But in the Kobayashi, Kirk brought in the data whereas Twilight only brought herself and her hidden potential. The Rainboom effect was really more a coincidence.

Can we see Spike castrate Shining? Those claws have got to do something!

>>13185041318504 I don't know if it will come to that and Spike ditched Twilight as well so he's just as guilty.

>>13185341318534 Yes, but as I see it, Spike is the only one willing to take action to try and correct his mistake.

Plus...you know...Spike being angry is just awesome. :D

Did we really see much of Spike in the Royal Wedding episodes? I can't really recall him making much of an appearance.

“…I hate you.”

Twilight sent another wave of emotion at her.

“I HATE YOU!”

When I read that part it made me think of Anakin sliding down into the lava after Obi Wan cut off his legs.

>>13185431318543

Spike had a VERY small role in the episode, other than a few jokes. As such, that is why, of all of them, he will have the best chance of talking to Twilight without ending up with a mouth for a magic.

As for people calling for Shining's death...well, even as much as I hate his character, that isn't the route I am going to go and even the worst characters deserve some rounding out, so expect to get Shiny's perspective next chapter.

Image: http://geekspodcast.com/geekpress/wp-content/uploads/2009/07/dawson_crying-1.gif

Aw, damn.... Right in the feels.

>>13185801318580 Well to be fair, Shining did fuck up so I want to see at least some physical damage.

Keep in mind, he did abandon Twilight for the hot piece of ass and didn't even talk to Twilight except as an after-thought.

"Oh Twi, by the way. I'm porking your old baby-sitter. Also, that nursery rhyme has a whole new different meaning now."

/scumbag-Shining