• Member Since 24th Jan, 2012
  • offline last seen Mar 19th, 2020

matrixjorel


E

Sequel to Aperture in my Heart. Chell is lost, and it is up to the ponies to make sure she returns home. However, between Chell and home stands an angry, all-powerful AI, test chambers, and lemons. A ton of lemons.

But no one, not even Space and Wheatley, knows what is waiting for them deep in the bowels of Aperture....

Chapters (4)
Comments ( 132 )

I hate revealing too much, but i will say this; Don't write Space Chaser off as a "Mary Sue" yet... Oh, and first!:pinkiehappy:

DAT CoD FANBOYISM!

... Did they forget that Chell was still there, since she's so quiet? Again?

queue position 25! 1279138 And yes, yes they did. But can you really blame them?:scootangel:

Finally! :rainbowkiss:

This is gonna be SO AWESOME! x3

Spotted some grammar mistakes in the last chapter... but I don't blame you. Good work.

...how did Lyra find out about CoD?

1280772 Same way she found about humans, however that is.

1281451humans i could understand, but CoD? besides possibly finding a game, i don't see how that would work.

COD?:facehoof: let us not forget gta, mortal kombat, halo, super smash bros, battlefield, the bible :rainbowwild: i cant wait for more

The Call of Duty reference is more a joke than anything else, kinda breaking the fouth wall a bit... Just because I don't really like COD and the people who think war is all about predator missiles or M4's or other things like that. Remember, that was just a snippet of the next chapter, not really the important part!:twilightblush:

I mean, i'm no different than what I was before, except..
I'm :P

Hey, I really like the cover pic! Don't change it... :fluttercry:

This looks good. I'll have to find the prequel first though.

Chell is best pony!

Finally, a sequel! Huzzah!

I need a copy of "Humans Exist and I will Tell you All About Them in This Book"

Well, actually, the funny thing about that is

he's a coltcuddler isnt he

1280772 Magic it doesn't need a explanation

epic sequal is epic:pinkiehappy:

1290021 i did to but i burned it because i am pen strokes evil twin sister and i dont beleave in humans:pinkiecrazy::pinkiehappy:

1280466
Lol this works with

surprisingly well

1290332 but it's not magic, it's ancient tech.

1290762
This is a different world. There were humans there.

I will say this... you aren't giving us much to go with when it comes to Chell. She's been very very unresponsive, and she can certainly respond to questions even if she can't speak. You've so far made her out to be robotic, an emotionless figure, and that's kinda boring. She can smile, look afraid or glare angrily... so far all we know is that she's been walking with them. We don't know if she looks scared or suspicious of Wheatly (she could be constantly trying to keep an eye on him, even as she walks).

It's hard to get into this story, because of that. Chell might be a silent protagonist in the game, but she's a CHARACTER now... I think you could use some more defining characteristics. Wheatly and Space have really bombastic personalities, but you have to pay attention to ALL your characters. We just got introduced to this new character... why should we care about her? what's so interesting about Chell? The fact that I can't tell from this story, and have to subsitute my own knowledge of the game, isn't a good thing.

Or of course, Twilight might just not be paying attention to those things, because Chell looks friggen weird. Fluttershy might though: she's used to looking at nonverbal cues from animals.

1292131 You burned a book. Twilight is going to hunt you down.

1292159 twilight doesnt care about a myth about humans (I say as i write about a girl going to equestria for some reason i wont say)

1292429 Why would she have the book in her Library, and have read it, as stated in the story?

1292432 because she heard the word human and wanted to learn about what a human is so she can tell if chell is human

1292453 She had read it previously though...

1292109 Okay, thanks. It is freaking hard to get Chell going without breaking the preset notion that she cannot/will not talk. I'll try to fix that in the next chapter!

Need more. Getting good. I like trains and potatoes. Moar

1293701
Cool! good luck. Just don't forget: though Chell might not be able to talk, she still feels things. Even without words she'll have a personality, a story of her own.

>dat COD joke
i3.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/000/295/379/606.gif

need an icepack, COD players? 'cause you just got burned!
:trollestia:

1294247
At that degree of burn, an icepack might hurt more than help. Better to just wash some lukewarm water over it.:twilightsmile:

1294503
i2.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/000/399/610/a93.gif

lukewarm?
look worm?
lark firm?
bark fern?
snark burn?
idk :pinkiecrazy:

Human: even our "domesticated" pets turn into prolific killers.

No, seriously: in terms of "kills other species", humans are easily #1 (that we've prolly killed at least one of everything that did not have the fortune of being extinct already), followed by house cats, and dogs rank pretty high too.

I don't think sneakpeeks are good idea. It's because you see a story updated, you want to read it but then it turns out it's a small sneakpeek.
Also, You should go to the prequel and first chapter here to edit few mistakes people point out in comments. If you want I can be your Pre-Reader, just let me know

1297085

I second your comment regarding sneak peeks. I would rather wait for a full chapter than get updates that aren't really updates.

1293701 You could always do some magic spell to repair her brain, or fix her vocal chords (I always thought she never talked because she couldn't) or make an amulet that lets her project her thoughts aloud. There's a lot of work arounds to get a character talking.

1306048 Maybe nothing too drastic, although I did just find THIS, and since it's canon, no one can get mad!:rainbowlaugh:

1294586
Trying to reference the fact that with second- and third-degree burns, ice doesn't help all that much, and can actually harm. For second-degree, the first aid is usually cool water, and lukewarm water for a third-degree burn, if you must put anything on it.:twilightsmile:

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