Please let me know of any spelling errors! (Unless it's something like American vs. Canadian.  There are select words I spell American, but the rest are usually Canadian.  Though sometimes I do get some German thrown in there..) Or any continuity errors!  Thanks!

(Also, I can never remember how to make the long dash.  Hence the --- a lot.  Sorry!)

>>12735201273520

FOUND ONE

"There are a select words I spell American"

lulululul sorry, I'll read it later.

>>12735271273527

STFU.  Your quote is inaccurate now bitch.

This is looking interesting.

I saw that video, and man it creeped me out. I'm very interested in reading a story based on it.

Hmm...this seems oddly familiar...

first lol

do want.

>>12735201273520

For em dash Alt + 0151 should work. Alt + 0150 for en dash.

You're welcome.

Hell of a coincidence that I found this now, since I'm on my phone. I like this a lot already, and I would offer my services as a prereader, but I've already got a story I'm working on. I might still be able to, but I'm not sure right now. Anyway, good job, looking forward to the next chapter.

So boss. It's a very well written first chapter and I am waiting breathlessly for the next one. Also... Sweetie Belle...

>>12746931274693

Bah!  Except considering this is my first time on fimfiction, and I don't intend to read any other work, I had no idea.  I just couldn't sleep one night because the idea kept forming in my head. (And creeping me out.)

>>12747921274792

Thank you!!!

>>12748131274813

I know   teared up a little when I was leaving Sweetie Belle behind

>>12746931274693 ...and that isn't even the only other fic to start with the same premise. Hive Mind I think was the other one I saw?

>>12735201273520

" (Unless it's something like American vs. Canadian."

You mean American vs British?

>>12748511274851

Nope, Canadian. There are differences between Canadian and British.

>>12748621274862

Huh

Never heard anyone use it before.

>>12746931274693

>>12748421274842

No worries on my part! I approve more people writing more stuff. I hope to read this one, myself. =D

I will say, though, that the cocoon vector image in the video was made by user Atnezau on DeviantArt, and it is not creative commons licensed.

In an odd turn of events, that other fic mentioned by Nostalgia Schmaltz has been frontpaged on EQD, yet it has the screenshot you have chosen here as the header...

It confused me greatly...

>>12748421274842

There's nothing wrong with different authors writing a story on the same idea, but... Well, the timing works against you, as the other story linked appeared on Equestria Daily today, and the post there uses the same image as the one you chose.

I'd suggest finding a different picture, just to make it clearer that you're not intentionally copying the idea.

>>12751101275110

Oh no, I know that.   I remember my favorite author saying that she felt crushed when she realized someone had submitted a novel with the same premise as her.  But they always go off in different directions.

Where else to get a super creepy pic of ponies? Hmmm...

Just wanted to say thanks to everyone so far for reading my story and all of the positive feedback!  I've never let anyone read any of my stories before

Anyone interested in making some cover art for me?

This story has caught my interest...lets see where this goes

Ok!  Here's Chapter 2!  I was a little eh.. on doing two Twilight chapters in a row, but I had her next phase planned out in more detail than the others.

I don't plan on all chapters being this long!

Also still open to anyone who wants to make me some cover art (so it doesn't look like I'm copying this other story that I've never seen)

And I realize this chapter pretty much ends with the same wording as the first one.  That's just the way it sounded best in my head, so, ba ha, deal with it.

a bit rushed but good all the same

Hurrah, nice update, now with Princess Luna by their side the Changeling army doesn't stand a chance.

Please do keep up the good work upon such a wonderful story as this one.

>>12869131286913

Thanks for such a nice comment!

Very nice... Keep up the good work!

I noticed two errors:

"Or maybe the hissing was there their way of communication.

Quickly, Twilight hissed back.  She couldn't hesitate too long, lest they become suspicious.  She hissed back viscously viciously, and kept walking."

Otherwise, good story!

>>12889071288907

Thanks for the corrections!  Typos drive me crazy, especially when they're my own.  My spelling has gone downhill lately (just ask BronyMike), so it's much appreciated!

Here's Chapter 3!  Yay Pinkie! Please let me know of any (ridiculous) typos!  Not doing my best at proofreading right now, because, well, I should be doing homework instead of writing in general.

Uh is allowing pinkie pie access to grenades smart? I dont think so lol

There will be explosives.

I approve wholeheartedly.

Do I suspect an upgrade form of the Party Cannon in future chapters of this story ?

So apparently the Mane Six were sent to wherever they were most needed...interesting...

As if the party cannon wasn't enough.....now she's got full on explosives

Ok everypony, here's a little bit of late night writing for you!  Chapter 4!  Just a little chapter, but be prepared for typos errryyywhere!

Thanks again for those who continue reading!

Awwww.

All my feels.

Rainbow Dash trying to be patient:

Image: http://dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/sillyfilly_Rainbow_Dash.png

Image: http://dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/shrug_Rainbow_Dash.png

Image: http://dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_rainbowkiss_flip.png

YAY, good Derpy's here to save the day.

THis adventure's going to be fun and easy now.

Please do keep up the good work.

These things feed off of the love ponies feel for others, right? That means that they can't lock onto somepony without much a social life; thus Rainbow Dash has been saved by someone Blessed With Suck.

I'm enjoying this story a lot. I can't wait to see where the other 4 need to be and what allies they're going to recruit.

>>13020701302070

You mean other 3 =D  We've seen Twilight, Pinkie and Rainbow Dash so far.  Next will either be Applejack or Rarity.

>>13030861303086 Woops, my bad. I meant 3.

So we're slowly getting an army built up, huh? Looks like Chrysalis has cause for alarm.

A'ight, here's Chapter 5.  It's not the best chapter, but I had to get Applejack's chapter out of the way first, before I could move onto Rarity or Fluttershy.

Things are a brewin'

Ohh Zecora is safe?

So, whatever they're planning, they'll have to do it from either Zecora's hut or the old palace.

Evil will never win as long as there are good ponies fighting back.

>>13128111312811

Execpt evil will always triumph,because good is dumb.

I must say that is a somber update, especially in a tragic light

I wonder how they'll tell Applebloom about this ?

Nice update and great bonding moments between the two siblings.

I'm guessing Fluttershy will be getting Zecora...just a guess.

BAAAAHHH HAAHAHAHAHA!

Rarity's Chapter!  It's more rushed and shorter than I had sort of hoped it would be. I think that's just 'cause I was so excited (!!!!!) to write it because:

A) It's RARITY's Chapter

B) Something super important happens!

C) Rarity!

Yay Rarity! Sounds to me that Rarity is your best pony, mine too. A lot of people give her shit, but when need be, she gets down and dirty. She just doesn't like to unnecessarily.

hmm, if I were Celestia, I'd send them all to the diamond dog hideout. It's underground and the changelings probably assume the diamond dogs are all dead anyway, there's little chance of them being discovered. I doubt just having the elements solves the problem instantly, they'd probably still have to confront Chrystalis without getting caught.

Clever Celestia, very clever.

Nice update and interesting team-up, I wonder who will Fluttershy and Twilight find ?

Please do keep up the good work upon such a great tale like this one.

Wait.  This really is real?

>>13302431330243

So far Twilight has found Luna

Just as someone predicted!  Zecora!

Didn't quite turn out like I wanted to, but none of them really seem to.  And please forgive me, I'll get better at writing Zecora's rhymes.

And just as a side note, I absolutely hate Scootaloo.  Ask BronyMike, she is my most hated pony. Ever.  Hence why she has no place in this story.

Ah. Well, the others seem to have a certain measure of fondness for her so it's "Let's kill Chrysalis" time.

You killed scoots nooooooooo i love everypony :(

Good work tho i love this story so far

It's ok everypony, she's in a better place now.

Man, Rainbow Dash is just going to lose it when she finds out that Scootaloo's dead... + =

Nice update, and I was kind of shocked that you killed Scootaloo. I can almost see Dash just losing it and having somepony hold her down.

Please do keep up the good work upon such a great storyline as I cannot wait to see what happens next in this tale.

>>13362221336222

Image: http://dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/sillyfilly_Scootaloo.png

Image: http://dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/Scootaloo_lolface.png

>>13529311352931

Everyone has their most disliked pony, and mine just happens to be lil' Scootaloo.

And I got word of Faust's design and that was a little Easter egg I threw in there ;)

Ok, so, a pretty weak chapter but I had to post something.

And the next chapter will be Twilight Sparkle again, because I didn't want to post a super long chapter, and her next encounter was going to be separated anyways.

Promise will post again soon!

Everypony!!!

For those who are unaware of my little pinecone tidbit/hat off to my bro (BronyMike) this is where the pinecone reference comes in:

http://trixieeatingpinecones.tumblr.com/

>>13583211358321 ok i don't know what is up with Trixie....but I LOOOOOOOOOOVE IT! Insanity FTW or whatever is going on with Trixie....but i do feel sorry for that pine cone!

What if Chrysalis is fighting a turf war against Discord? What if, in their hatred, they hired several ponies/dragons/minotaurs/griffons/goats/anything of 9 different classes continuously fighting to the death via a machine that magically brings them back to life. They fight in many ways, capturing intelligence, capturing areas and buildings, holding down a single point for a specific amount of time, or pushing a bomb to the others base.

But bam! A twist! A third one, Celestia, sends robots of the mercenaries to fight and kill Discord and Chrysalis. Do protect their lives, they team up and...

Goddammit, I need to stop playing TF2.

DANG, didn't see that Coming....I mean Twilight meeting an insane version of Trixie.

This could be a bit interesting and a bit difficult for Twilight to endure, but desperate times calls for desperate measures, right ?

Nice update and great usage of the Shadowbolts as I didn't know Princess Luna held this power?

Nice udpate overall as I can't wait to see what happens next.

While it's great to see Princess Luna again, what she revealed was some surprises for Twilight and her friends to endoure.

I mean it was Discord's twisted words that caused her to change into Nightmare Moon and she still has some of her powers from that time.

I cannot wait to see what happens next in this story, especially after a reveal or two like that.

Trixie has lost it and is now obsessed with a pinecone. So many lol's x3

>>12747921274792 Ifi I hold alt and type what you wrote, the dash doesn't come up. Can you help? I never understood how ti do those kinds of shortcuts.

RRRRRRAAAAARRRRRRRRRIIIIIIIIIIIITTTTTYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!

Omffgggggg!!!!

It's really concerning me that some people are reading newer chapters before older chapters.  That just doesn't compute people.  The numbers don't make sense.  Read them in order, otherwise you'll miss important things.

Don't worry everypony!  Next chapter continues with Rarity's rescue and her rescuers!

awww why did it have to be another pony that rescues Rarity. i wanted her hero to be spike lol

So now they're starting to hook up. Good. The more, the merrier.

Ummm.... i have a question! Where did those boxes come from that she used to escape.

>>13798121379812

Where indeed

>>13791391379139

Your comment made me LOL and it was much appreciated.

>>13798121379812 The rock farm. Pinkies sisters said they found a cave and were mining gems.

>>13802191380219

Please do continue this story as  I cannot wait to see what comes next in this tale of yours ?

Plus, I wonder what happen to Spike in all the chaos and maddness of the wedding ?

Anyone else imagining Blinkie walking away all nonchalant from the explosion?

>>13847881384788

+ badass smirk on face

So, they gotta patch Rarity up before hooking up with the others. I think I know of somepony who could probably handle that.

>>13848131384813

Obvs

So that's what happen to Rarity as she is saved by Pinkie and her sisters. Nice update and it would be interesting to see how Rarity takes the Pie sisters as opposed to her own sisterly relationship with Sweetie Belle.

Nice update and nice insight on what happen to Pinkie's family after she left.

Interesting occupations that the other Pie sisters have,....makes me wonder what the future holds for them when all is said and done.

Please do keep up the good work upon such a great tale like this one.

How dare those changelings hurt rarity! Where is spike?

>>13847881384788

Badass mares don't look at explosions.

>>13862521386252

I know, that's why she's just walking away all cool-style

>>13585811358581 You have no idea how hard I laughed at this comment. And you know what? that would make an awesome fanfic.

Image: //dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/discord.png

Image: //dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/shrug_Queen_Chrysalis.png

Boo, she survived. BOOOOOOOOOOOO

This isn't going to work is it

>>13847881384788

While pulling on a pair of sunglasses.

There were explosives. You fleshed out Pinkie's family. You've given her mother characteristics that make her likable and made me really hope she's ok, and I feel involved in the story.

This is going well.

>>13862521386252 Hooah! If I have to write some words, I will!

Ok guys!  Sort of a rushed chapter, but I just wanted to get it out of the way and for them to meet up

Sorry if you feel cheated that I didn't write out AJ and Big Mac's short walk from the farm to Ponyville.  I assure you they'll all get their proper air time

Next up, I should think we'd get Twilight making the scene.

BONUS LUNA CHAPTER!

For any other late night readers! (It's really late/super early morning where I am :P )

IMPORTANT NOTE:

Please please PLEASE make sure you read the chapters in order!  Whenever I tend to post two at a time, whichever one is posted first tends to get over looked!

Chapter 7 has more views than 6, 9 more than 8, and it's just not right people!

So if anyone is confused as to how/why Luna is suddenly in the maze, this means you didn't read Chapter 8! GO BACK AND READ IT!

Yay. Two chapters at the same day

Yay another awesome chapter. I loved the touching moments between rainbow and aj. Aj will be so happy to see applebloom when they get to zecoras. The group is almost back together.  Still no spike yet!

Uh-oh let hope Luna survives this battle.

I wonder what the changelings want with Discord ?

Nice update keep up the good work.

Great update I still cannot wait to see how Rainbow Dash takes the news of Scootaloo's death.

Great spotlight on Derpy and Rainbow Dash in this chapter.

Nice update and reunion between friends/rivals.  I can't wait to read more of this story.

Yay two chapters in one day THE FUN HAS BEEN DOUBLED

I do hope luna is okay tho.  Im sad still over scootaloos death