When a contemporary human stumbles upon Equestria and makes his presence known in Ponyville, he believes he is living his most cherished desire. But reality soon begins to intrude upon his Hub-tinted vision of this magical land and he begins to question his most basic assumptions about life, Equestria, and what My Little Pony means to him. Ultimately, the characters he knows and loves could end up influencing the most important decision he will ever make.
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This is my first FiMfic, so be gentle guys! Constructive criticism is always welcome, and please do comment. And, as always, thanks for reading.
Artwork by Mandi "Mitti" Tremblay - www.potluckart.com
Chapters (3)
Made an account just to track this :3
Looking good so far, keep 'em coming!
An interesting take on Human in Equestria, looking forward to the next chapters
Very nice... I shall track.
The story is very well written, I can't wait to see where it goes!
Oh, it seems promising... But I feel like I need another chapter before I'll really know what to think of this.
well i be damned that was pretty cool
I need more
MOAR
Yep...more.
great
I liked it so far and I love the idea.
I cannot wait to read the rest!
Well, I came a long way to be here today
And I left you so long on this avenue
And here I stand in the strangest land
Not knowing what to say or do
As I gaze around at these strangers in town
I guess the only stranger is me
And I wonder (yes I wonder)
Yes, I wonder (oh I wonder)
Is this the way life's meant to be?
OP y u no deliver?
This seems promising...
I have a natural skepticism towards these kinds of stories. However, something about the tone of this one, and the interactions of the characters, seems spot-on. Plus, it's well written. I'm hooked!
One quibble is that it seems like the ponies in this story are larger than I usually imagine them -- but that's open to interpretation anyhow. Plus, I guess it's a good thing they are big enough that he can easily enter and move about in their buildings.
Markarian: Where did you get the toy ponies in that picture, can I get them here in Holland (online maybe). I want one! (Rainbow Dash) They look way better than everything I've seen!
Another good chapter, looking forward to what comes next
128031
As far as I know, these ponies were sold in a set of 12 exclusively by a store we have here in the US, called Toys R Us. They are the same as "blind bag" ponies, but they come as a collector's set of 12 with the mane six, including six other ponies. An example of the set can be found here:
http://www.ebay.com/itm/My-Little-Pony-TRU-12-FIM-Friendship-Magic-COLLECTION-SET-G4-HUB-/300649274874?pt=LH_DefaultDomain_0&hash=item460017ddfa#ht_8043wt_1398
If you just want Dash, just search eBay.com for "rainbow dash blind bag." I hope this helps, and thanks for reading!
I look forward to reading what happens next in your story
Two problems:
1) "Remotest" isn't a word.
2) The part between Caleb getting run over and waking up is vague. According to what you wrote, he didn't lose conscious after he got hit. He only suffered. While this isn't necessarily a problem, if this isn't what you intended, I suggest you rewrite that section.
Loving this so far.
I want moar nau pleez? Lol. This was a good read.
128530
Thanks for the help. Looks like Hasbro messed up on the mane and tail colors (AGAIN!) In that case, I think I'l go for Pinkie Pie!
I have a feeling he's scared of AJ with her lie detecting powers.
Aw, wow, this is really great! I heard about this fic on the last Bronyville episode, and... wow. Please update!
200920 Dude, love that podcast, and they actually read my email on that one (halo brony)
200920
Thanks, everypony. You guys are the best. I'll try to get chapter three out within a sane amount of time, but all the planning for EFNW has eaten a lot of my spare time, as one could imagine. Thanks again for reading.
Came here through the Bronyville podcast - Brilliant story so far - Fantastic writing style!
I'm surprised Caleb didn't comment on the "Lily returned with a glass of water, handing it to Caleb." statement ;)
I'm anxious to see what Caleb gets up to - It would also be interesting for him to comment on things that he could not possibly know due to his Brony-related knowledge (Eg: Scenes from the series where characters are alone in a location doing something)
I must admit - The second you started describing Fluttershy's house, I was like "OMG YES YES YES!!!
"
Good luck with the story! :D
He could always just explain away his knowledge as being a sort of seer, or something. It's not like anyone would be around to know better. Anyway, this is set at the very beginning of the series, right? Shouldn't the Apple Family reunion be going on, among other things?
Anyway, this is an interesting take on the HiE concept.. I like it. Looking forward to more!
Glad to see this updated and FIRST!!!!
YAY another chapter. I can't wait for the next one.
Professor Hugbox here. The amount of good reactions you've gotten so far are quite surprising for a story like this. I will be sure to follow that example of open-mindedness. I will be beginning now.
574116
I really do appreciate it. I know this kind of story isn't exactly everypony's cup of tea, but I hope you enjoy it just the same.
Ok, this is pretty awesome, very well done. I need more.
Wow - That was an interesting way to describe how he knew what was going on - Congrats :D
Looking forward to more :D
You updated! YAY!
Been following this since being promoted by someone in the Fanfiction section of the Bronyville podcast. And I looooove it!!! Just please please please update more! :)
I was wondering when you were going to touch on the "You are in a TV show" trope. :D You did it nicely. And it's just like Applejack to not question anything. LOL
I'm hoping another update will soon our way come. Though the premise of the story is generic and overused, the way you tell it is what makes it great. This has great potential.
Any ETA for an update?
Hey Markarian. I was listening to BronyShow and got to where you were like first mentioned and then this fic was mentioned in the same ep. I gotta tell ya, this is a bit better than I thought it would be. But ya haven't updated for almost a year now. I'd hate to see this story die as it has pretty good promise. So I can only imagine that you are just super busy and have no time at all really to update. Hope you find time to write more and update this story, as truly this is a good story so far.
No criticisms thus far. The reading format is a bit rough but then my eyes are used to a slight spacing and actual spaced out paragraphs, not everything roughly on top of each other.
Nothing else to say really, so good luck at managing your time and please consider continuing this good story.
Today is 2018. And there is no updates.
I guess Chapter 4 is never, ever, ever, ever, ever going to happen.
He's lucky to not get the Zecora treatment
8975848
Eenope.