You seem to have javascript disabled, or your browser is failing to execute it properly. Much of Fimfiction's functionality requires javascript so we suggest you turn it on! If this message goes away after a few seconds, ignore it, javascript support sometimes takes a few seconds to detect.

Featured In13

More Stories47

  • E Dinky's First Kill

    Like every little filly, Dinky loves everypony and everything... except spiders.
    3,649 words · 6,247 views  ·  542  ·  6
  • E Dance 'Til We're High

    Twilight looks for love at the Winter's Eve Ball. What she finds is like nothing she expected.
    12,494 words · 11,557 views  ·  787  ·  20
  • E Whisk

    A colt and his fathers move to Ponyville to start a new life.
    13,364 words · 1,973 views  ·  115  ·  1
  • T Epic Unicorn History: The Beards of Harmony

    Barely three years old, the fledgling nation of Equestria is threatened by chaos foretold in a dream. It's up to Star Swirl and five erstwhile, beardy stallions to brave the Forest Ever Free in search of their only salvation.
    30,755 words · 2,224 views  ·  230  ·  5
  • E A Lovely Apology

    Spitfire decides to make up for an embarrassing mistake by inviting Filthy Rich out for a night on the town.
    6,802 words · 1,862 views  ·  138  ·  2
  • E The Sun Shines Brightest at Night

    Nightmare Moon's defeat meant more to Equestria than just the return of the sun and their Princess. Witness the conclusion of a story one thousand years in the making, through the eyes of a Hoofington nurse.
    6,108 words · 948 views  ·  91  ·  1
  • T Laugh, Laugh

    Though she admired him, Pinkie Pie was never close to Ponyacci. She wasn't expecting him to call her to visit. She really wasn't expecting to find him like this...
    1,122 words · 712 views  ·  114  ·  2
  • E Treehouse

    She stumbles into the Whitetail Woods one last time, to finish what she'd started so many years before...
    1,988 words · 1,275 views  ·  103  ·  2

Blog Posts665

  • Sunday
    IMDB is my TVTropes

    Pay close attention to the little girl in this promo clip:


    Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you: Andrea Libman.

    Wasn't even her first role!

    Isn't nature fascinating?

    6 comments · 56 views
  • Sunday
    Fic recs, November 23rd: Project Get! #3

    Ha haaa! I bet you thought I'd forgotten about this, eh? Well, fret no more! It's just the nature of the various reading projects I've set up that I do a little for each here and there before releasing one.

    Also I bet you thought I was running out of SONATA PICS YEEEAAAAHHH!

    H: 0 R: 1 C: 5 V: 1 N: 3

    You Learn by A Hoof-ful of Dust

    Genre: Slice of Life

    Three looks at Apple Bloom learning things. It’s not quite a kishotenketsu, I don’t think, but if you go into this expecting a normal mode of storytelling, you’ll be left scratching your head. Here’s the clue: the final scene is meant to be compared to the first two. Once you know that, the rest should come. Beyond narrative technique, this also features some really excellent writing (and hey, it even passes the Zecora test!) Not much happens, but it’s a very pleasant read and gets its point across in a refreshingly unique way.

    Recommended

    The Lucky Ones by Educated Guess

    Genre: War

    A scene during the siege of a fortress. This was written for one of the World-Building Alliance things, but the world-building is really haphazard. It comes off as a list of names that refer to nothing at all, and there isn't really anything pony about it, aside from a horse pun and the mention of the pony races. I like that seaponies are a major part of this, but I can’t say the actual details of their society were terribly interesting. Mostly, I just couldn’t figure out what the hell was going on. Only attempt this if you don’t mind everything being completely alien.

    Not Recommended

    The Baltimare Chase by DegeTheMighty

    Genre: Chase Scene

    Shining Armor pursues a fugitive through town. For just being a long action scene, this is really intense and it grabbed me immediately. There’s no real explanation for how they got into this situation, but the action flows smoothly and the writing is evocative. That said, it could also use some cleanup; this feels like a first draft, with typos, LUS, and some passages that need tightening down. Still, if you like action scenes, this is pretty short, and has a couple neat ideas to boot.

    Recommended If You Don’t Mind LUS

    Winter Threads by Dreamy Days

    Genre: Slice of Life

    A pegasus walks around Manehattan and thinks about all the ponies who he could help, but can’t. He does end up helping one, thank goodness, because this would have been very dull otherwise. I once wrote a story where the narrator wandered around his town, commenting on the bleak bleakness of everything about him, and the first third or so of this made me think of it (and how awful it was). Instead, what we get is a lesson in the value of kindness, wrapped in some fairly lackluster and unfocused writing. Not to mention, it’s very Earth-analogue. (I can’t imagine a pony threatening another the way the bellhop does; also why is it the bellhop’s business who’s paying what for their room?) I suppose this might be worth it if you need something to restore your faith in humanity.

    Vaguely Recommended

    On a Cool Summer Night by psp7master

    Genre: World-Building

    In the early days of Equestria, a stallion from Saddle Arabia is called under the tutelage of Star Swirl the Bearded. What caught my attention is that, when writing about ancient Equestria, we usually just write about, well, Equestria. I’ve never even considered what the zebras or anyone else might have been doing at that time. That said, this does have some problems, all of them conceptual. (Well, I did tire of the continual stream of honorifics directed at the Queen, but that at least fits.) I was charmed by the idea that Saddle Arabia is matriarchal, just like Equestria, so the slightly less appealing aspects snuck up on me. Yeah, Islamic culture is just sort of copy-pasted into this as world-building, and while the ending is nicely surprising, well… The confluence of the events with what goes into them is problematic, to say the least. I did at least enjoy it while reading.

    Recommended If You Like World-Buidling

    Leaving the Ground Behind by q97randomguy

    Genre: Inner Monologue

    A pegasus mailpony — no, not that pegasus mailpony — makes a delivery and contemplates the joys of flight. I’m surprised by this, because it gets somewhat poignant by the end. I mean, this is just a character sketch for an OC, but the character ends up being pretty compelling. Interesting.

    Recommended for Slice of Life Fans

    Folksong by Adda le Blue

    Mature: Sex

    Genre: Personal Writing

    Most of this reads like free-verse poetry, with a staccato, otherworldly feeling to the writing. It’s very hard to figure out what’s going on, but in a way that only makes you want to read further. Here’s what I know: the main character is a pegasus, part of the Royal Guard, and, I think, was originally human. Or else visited the human world once. She plays guitar. She’s learned that her father died. She has tumultuous sex with an unknown stallion. She blacks out from drinking too much and wakes up in Princess Luna’s bed, which is where things get considerably more concrete. Given the mental impairment, I think the scattershot writing really fits the mood, if nothing else. I do feel like there are one or two details this might need, just so we can draw solid conclusions by the end, but I’d recommend this just for the experience. I’ve definitely not read any fics like it. Check it out if you're up for a challenge!

    Recommended for Fans of Experimental Writing

    What Color Are My Eyes? by Protopony350

    Mature: Gore

    Genre: Horror

    Vinyl Scratch sets the record straight about the color of her eyes. Do not read this without heeding the warning in the description, it is very a propos. I wish I had more positive things to say about this. The idea is creative, and the final line is just perfect, not to mention I got a perverse kick out of Vinyl’s thinking that a pony with a scalpel cutie mark was a doctor. Unfortunately, this doesn’t have much going for it other than shock value. The writing is rushed and full of typos, and there is definitely room for expansion. I think the only people who would want to read this are those who enjoy gorefics.

    Not Recommended

    Eyes on the Road by Art Inspired

    Genre: Drama

    Lightning Dust tries to redeem herself in Rainbow Dash's eyes and be recruited into the Wonderbolts. This gets off to a poor start with a telly prologue that lays out just how things have changed since Wonderbolt Academy. The writing continues to be telly, and in need of a good proofread, as we move into the main portion of the story. Now, this does set up some good interpersonal tension, and I liked Spitfire’s dynamic with Lightning Dust. But all of that is dropped for chapters two and three, which are a lengthy action scene involving a race to determine the next Wonderbolts recruit. This is a setup I have some issues with, but really, it’s not the worst part of this story. Rather, the author attempted a “it doesn’t matter who wins, the important thing is they make up” ending, which would have been the right thing to do if so much attention hadn’t been put onto the race. I didn’t like the race segment, but I wanted to know who won! That kind of ending only works when the personal drama is front and center. Suffice to say, I found this story supremely unsatisfying to read, and it would take a lot of work to improve it.

    Not Recommended

    Ra Ra Raspberry by Loganberry

    Genre: Historical Crossover by Way of Musical Reference

    The tragic tale of Raspberry Ripple, who loved too much. If you are not up on memes — and I mean really up on them — you will miss out on this story’s central joke. However, you might still get the historical references, so there’s something to be said for this; knowing the referenced song will thus explain why certain odd choices in telling the story were made. I was charmed by the storyteller approach, which helped wave away some of the flimsier parts of the story, as well as the “alternate Equestrias” framing narrative. I can’t really think of anything else to say that wouldn’t spoil it. I guess, if you read it and are still confused, click on this for the answer. (But not before, I’m serious!)

    Recommended If You’re Knowledgeable About Memes

    13 comments · 156 views
  • Saturday
    Fic recs, November 22nd

    Jeff Burgess, possibly our fandom’s best musician, has written a concept album based on Device Heretic’s story Eternal. (That’s the Youtube link, not the story link.) It’s a really great album, especially if you’re into indie and/or experimental music. Check it out!

    If you thought the ride was over, well brother, you were wrong! (And whooooooa this one’s not Sonata!)

    It's weird how much my reading schedule depends on me walking on the treadmill in the morning. c.c I haven't done that all week, but it's time for this dry spell to end! In the meantime, have a bunch of stuff Youtube picked out for me. :B Also, my 1500th review, and oh, what a story it happens to be!

    H: 1 R: 3 C: 0 V: 0 N: 1

    A Muddy Hole by PoweredByTea

    Reading by DeftFunk

    Genre: Comedy

    A behind-the-scenes from Sisterhooves Social, answering the question: How did Applejack get Rarity into that mud pit? Applejack’s usual roles among her friends in fanfic are either straightmare or well-meaning antagonist. This story shows just how much comedic potential she has: more, I’d say, than even the show writers consider using. It’s wonderful watching her snark her way through helping Rarity, and I got a kick out of the schadenfreude. This is rather straightforward, but nevertheless some of the best AJ/Rarity interaction I’ve seen outside of shipping.

    Recommended

    Hearth’s Warming Eve by Admiral Biscuit

    Reading by Hero541

    Genre: Holiday Special

    Dinky and Sparkler try to make Hearth’s Warming Eve special for their hard-working mother. There really is not a lot to this story; it’s short, heartwarming fluff. But for once in my life, I actually like short, heartwarming fluff, because I have lived this story. My dad’s a mail carrier, and many are the Christmas Eves we stayed up watching the snow and hoping he would make it home. We’re lucky he carries in an affluent Cleveland suburb, because around Christmas, he could bring home hundreds of dollars in tips in a day, as well as fancy candies, cookies and other items we’d never have a prayer of affording on a regular basis. So remember to tip your letter carrier around this time of year, and your paper carrier too, if you get it delivered. You’ll help make someone’s holiday brighter.

    Recommended

    Treadmill Twilight by Derpator

    Reading by Akash the Reader

    Genre: Comedy

    Twilight thinks Pinkie called her fat, so she’s burning calories on a treadmill. Part of me wonders if I would have liked this more had I been reading it while on the treadmill myself, but I think the answer is “no”. The characters are all good, but the writing is plain and fraught with errors. The narrative continually finds ways to repeat itself, like in the first few paragraphs, where both Pinkie and Twilight confirm that Twilight is wearing Pinkie’s workout clothes. (Something I really need to see, just sayin’.) Attempts to be descriptive stumble over themselves, we’re constantly reminded of what each character knows, and the telly narrative focuses on the oddest things. I can’t help but think this might be sweat fetish fuel. I laughed at a couple lines, but there’s not much point to this.

    Not Recommended

    The Best Present She Could Ask For by theswimminbrony

    Reading by Dr. Wolf

    Genre: Mother’s Day Special

    Dinky wants to give her Mommy a card for Mommy’s Day, but Mommy is too tired to notice. It’s a very odd quirk of fate that I got two holiday-themed Derpy’s family fics in a row. Like Hearth’s Warming Eve, this one goes for the d’awws, and Dinky is so fucking precious that she flips the dial from “ugh” to “wait, I actually like this”. This doesn’t offer a whole lot more, story-wise, than that previous fic, but I found myself enjoying it from start to finish. It gets a little melodramatic in the middle, and it definitely seems to drag on past where it should have ended, while quoting numerous classic fan comics (I think), but honestly, if you’re looking for something cute and heartwarming, look no further.

    Recommended

    A Moment in the Sun by Chengar Qordath

    Reading (part 1) by Goombasa

    Review #1500!

    Genre: Tragedy

    The tragic downfall of Sunset Shimmer, student of Princess Celestia. This is, without a doubt, one of the best tragedies I have ever read. Despite knowing how it’s going to end (though, vague spoiler, it doesn’t quite butt up against Equestria Girls), watching Sunset slowly dig herself deeper and deeper was delicious. The things she says toward the end just took my breath away. This is a look at how compelling self-fulfilling prophecies can be, and how impossible it is to break oneself from the habits of delusional thinking. There’s also some very timely stuff in there about how we view our success versus that of others. On top of that, it’s a very compelling look at Sunset as a character. Her voicing is excellent, whether filly or adult, and she’s set up as a very believable anti-Twilight: she doesn’t see the value in friendship and steadfastly refuses to listen to any of Celestia’s attempts to push her in the right direction in that regard. She also has crippling mommy issues, which was one of my favorite things about this. And it’s not just her who has a tragic flaw: Celestia openly shares the blame for what happens to Sunset, and if she can be accused of anything, it’s underestimating the effect she has on other ponies. Cadence also shows up halfway through as an unexpected but perfect foil for Sunset (this plays heavily off Cadence’s backstory from the first novel, fyi). Missteps were few and easy to sum up: a few word choices in the first chapter didn’t fit a filly; there are a number of spots toward the end where characters repeat themselves, to no real effect; and use of the word ‘plot’. (I have a slight quibble with the very end, too.) In all, this is a marvelous, emotional, very intense piece and I am definitely looking forward to the sequel.

    Highly Recommended

    15 comments · 209 views
  • Thursday
    Dear Princess Celestia,

    Today I learned that you can substitute 2 tbsp of water, 1 tbsp of oil, and 2 tbsp of baking powder for an egg.

    I also learned that you should not do this in a recipe meant for the microwave. Your cookie will explode into chocolate-chip foam all over the inside of the microwave.

    Just thought you should know.

    Your Restraining Order Defying Faithful Student,

    Perky Pickles

    PS: If you figured out how to make it reliably, you could totes put that shit on coffee. They do that these days, did you know that?

    23 comments · 117 views
  • Tuesday
    Fic recs, November 18th!

    Spoilers: I survived my procedure! :D It wasn't nearly as bad as I'd anticipated (actually, the prep Sunday was the worst part). I am something of a drama queen these days, and I don't like that. D:

    Goombasa has started an audiobook for Pascoite’s excellent Duet in the Folk Style!

    I'm reading the writeoff entries at the moment, so things will be slow and based more or less entirely on audiobooks. I've also started watching G3. Help me. D: Wooooo!

    H: 0 R: 0 C: 3 V: 1 N: 1

    The Best Clop-fic Ever! by ThatGuyFromKFC

    Reading by Smilin’ Sammy

    Genre: Ponies Doing People Things

    Twilight and her friends browse the internet. This was not my first time reading this story, and judging by how I rated it last time, my appreciation for it has not increased. The whole joke is that the ponies are “clopping” their hooves against the keyboards and no actual sex is happening, even though that fact is never really emphasized in the text. (This story, it should be noted, exists in the eleven thousands, number-wise, is just over 500 words long, and has over seventeen thousand views. Epic troll is epic.) I honestly can’t say what would have improved this: more of it, less of it, a different approach, who knows. It’s not even that notable. Read it if you can spare the time to run your eyes across 500 pointless words I guess?

    Not Recommended

    How to Train Your Pegasus by L3gion

    Reading (Part 1) by Illya Leonov and KittenKitoko

    Genre: Coming of Age

    A little pegasus filly is sent to live with her uncle on a rock farm and runs away, only to be kidnapped by a dragon with an eye for pony meat. (Has nothing to do with the Dreamworks movie How to Train Your Dragon, fyi.) This is one of those “small adventures”, where a lot happens in a limited area and most of the exploration comes in the form of personal growth. This does start off in an odd place, though: a scene with Snow Bolt, our protagonist, arguing with her father before he sends her away. The issue is one of sympathy. There’s no real indication of who to root for. Snow Bolt is set up as a Sympathy Sue with a laundry list of problems that will obviously be overcome by the end of the story — she’s got gimpy legs, she can’t fly, she’s a blank flank, she gets bullied at school — but she’s a right little shit, given what she says to her father. He, meanwhile, comes off as overbearing and controlling, but by the end of the scene, it seems like he might just be at his wits’ end raising a daughter by himself. This, as it turns out, is the case, and I’m very glad the final chapter gives us a bit of his perspective.

    As for the rest, well, it’s quite a ride. Mostly, it comes down to character dynamics. Snow Bolt is antagonistic toward her father. She ends up more or less as frenemies with Scarlet, the dragon. One could argue their relationship is actually more akin to Stockholm Syndrome, though I think the commenter who quoted The Princess Bride actually captures it perfectly. Yes, Scarlet continually belittles her and threatens to eat her, but it’s meant to be taken humorously, at least by the reader. Of course, it’s never quite clear just how much she does want to eat Snow Bolt, which keeps things interesting. And then there’s the squirrel, an odd if effective addition to the cast of characters. She and Snow Bolt hit it off after a rocky start, owing to the language barrier, and she not only serves as a friendly shoulder for Snow Bolt to lean on when Scarlet gets too overbearing, but also helps teach her how to fly.

    Missteps in the writing were unfortunately brought out by the reading, most notably close repetitions and an odd habit of having characters say things that could easily be covered by a dialogue tag, e.g.,  “‘Aaah!’ she shouted”. There were also some telling issues, mostly adverbs and those short prepositional phrases that explain what you've only just read. Then there’s Snow Bolt herself. Now, she’s not a Mary Sue, because she does grow over the course of the fic, and her character arc is probably the strongest part of the piece. But she’s also got aspects of both Fluttershy (talking to squirrel) and Rainbow Dash, and, in the story’s most eye-rolling moment, gets her cutie mark by performing a Sonic Snowboom. It was silly at a time meant to be a thrilling climax. Still, as flight-based fics go, this one really delivers; that subgenre tends to be a little dull, but I never found myself bored by the explanations of flight or anything else. This is a very enjoyable read, all things considered.

    Recommended If You Don’t Mind Some Imperfections in the Writing

    I Just Want to Fly by Firefly2012

    Reading by KittenKitoko

    She played Snow Bolt in Illya Leonov’s reading above. She’s a tad on the quiet side, and I was disappointed she didn’t do voices for Scootaloo or Rainbow Dash, but she’s absolutely spot-on with everything else. She’s only got two readings so far, so to the list she goes!

    Genre: Scootalove

    Scootaloo is depressed ‘cause she can’t fly, so Rainbow Dash writes a letter to the Princesses on her behalf. The writing is very, very telly, especially at the start, but I find I can’t hold that against this. The real draw here is the reason for Scootaloo’s flightlessness: it’s psychosomatic rather than physical. I was rather entranced by that. Luna’s advice is also good; I think I enjoy seeing her interact with Scootaloo more than Rainbow, anymore. Definitely a nice, light read.

    Recommended If You Value Substance Over Style

    Between the Lines by Bad_Seed_72

    Reading by Thornquill

    Whoa. This guy is pretty much perfect in every way. He’s every bit as good as Scribbler, and that should be all you need to know! His other readings include a one-shot, A Hoof-ful of Dust’s Synchronicity and Lost and Found, which he’s only a third of the way through, so I guess I’ll be watching him now!

    Genre: Character Piece

    After a book-related incident in the orchard, Twilight starts to think that there might be something wrong with Big Macintosh. It's 2014 and we’re still writing “an Apple can’t read” stories? This one at least makes an effort to differentiate itself from all the others, but it stumbles along the way. For starters, Twilight seems to spend a good two-thirds of the story with the Idiot Ball, trying to figure out what’s pretty easy for the reader to guess. She doesn’t, of course, and I was pleased that my suspicions are confirmed by the text. (She can hardly conceive of a pony who doesn’t like to read, let alone one who can’t.) But therein lies the problem: any bad feelings a reader might get about the first half of the story aren’t put to rest until the final third-to-quarter of it. And the reasons for why Big Mac can’t read, while compelling, are honestly just another “the Apple parents died when their kids were young, and said kids still carry the mental scars”. In trying to add something to one cliched trope, this only serves the reader with a second. As for the writing, well, maybe it’s just a result of my negative takeaway, but I couldn’t help noticing a lot of metaphors that felt really off-base or overblown. The church one near the end especially stands out; there’s an attempt to make it fit, but it honestly feels too much like ponifying an Earth institution without regard for the greater world. Beyond that, though, this is a Bad Seed story and I can’t fault much else. Give it a shot only if the premise is something you want to see done differently.

    Vaguely Recommended

    God Damn the Sun by Dark Avenger

    Prequel to Something Magical

    Collection is tagged Mature, but this story is not

    Genre: Sad

    Something Magical was Dark Avenger’s Outside Insight entry, a compelling story about an aging Cranky Doodle Donkey that nevertheless confused me due to his relationship with a griffin. With the prequel out to explain that, I had to read it right away. Unfortunately, this doesn’t cover the griffin part, but it does lay out, in rapid-fire form, Cranky’s life story, from that night at the Gala, to finding Matilda, to losing her again. That last part is what’s most compelling about this, the rest being perhaps a bit slim, only just enough to give a sense of what’s going on. That said, I found the idea of Cranky cursing the sun (and Celestia?) a might strained fitting into the story, but then I suppose he wouldn’t be Cranky if he didn’t have someone to be mad at. Definitely a good piece if you’re looking for more Cranky stuff.

    Recommended for Cranky Donkey Fans

    19 comments · 235 views
  • ...
 77
 3,375

A mysterious machine appears in Ponyville. At first, it's a curiosity. After its purpose is discovered, however, it quickly becomes a menace and Twilight must figure out a way to destroy it before peaceful Ponyville is torn apart at the seams.

A crossover with Machine of Death intended for readers unfamiliar with the novel.

Published on EQD September 15, 2012. Cover art rendered by Alexstrazsa.

First Published
10th Sep 2012
Last Modified
10th Sep 2012
#1 · 114w, 6d ago · · ·

*providesblood sample*

death by SnuSnu.


huh? wait.. what does that mean.. ohmygodno aaaahhhh!!!!!

#2 · 114w, 6d ago · · ·

Hmm... Well it tells them how they die, it doesn't cause premature death, right? So maybe not so bad. OK, I'll read it.

#3 · 114w, 6d ago · · ·

I assume Twilight's and Celestia's strips read "Act of Will" just based on the story title, but I was wondering what others' take on their fates was. Or is it clearer if you read the original story?

#4 · 114w, 6d ago · · ·

interesting...

PresentPerfect
Author Interviewer
#5 · 114w, 6d ago · · ·

>>1254548

You're correct about the first part, not sure what you mean about the second. Takes on their fates?

#6 · 114w, 6d ago · · ·

>>1254790

As in what they thought the strips said. Figured I might have missed something by not reading the original story

PresentPerfect
Author Interviewer
#7 · 114w, 6d ago · · ·

>>1254829

Well, the 'original story' is actually a collection of short stories.

And the reactions are varied. I go into some of them in the text. That's kind of the whole point, actually.

#8 · 114w, 6d ago · · ·

Good stuff. Written in a Mary Shelly/Bram Stoker style fitting of the subject matter.

#9 · 114w, 6d ago · · ·

“ACT OF WILL"?

Do you actually have an explanation in your own mind as to what this means, or is it supposed to be vague but without true meaning?

Either way, this was great! It's time for me to look up the original stories, because this is such a great concept. Awesome job here! :twilightsmile:

PresentPerfect
Author Interviewer
#10 · 114w, 6d ago · · ·

>>1255296

There's a meaning behind it. Just think about what it pertains to. :)

#11 · 114w, 6d ago · · ·

>>1255654

Okay, I do understand what you're getting at, I think...

...But I prefer to think of it as, say, Twilight willfully acts to save a town of ponies in a dragon attack or something. :scootangel:

PresentPerfect
Author Interviewer
#12 · 114w, 6d ago · 1 · ·

>>1255714

Machine predictions are finicky things. That's not what I intended, but I like the interpretation. :)

#13 · 114w, 6d ago · · ·

>>1255746

Your interpretation does sound like a very Celestia-ish thing to do, if you imagined a future where ponies are extinct and Celestia (and Luna, maybe) are the only ones left. But the way I personally interpret Twilight's personality...I just can't see it happening. So instead I'm going to say that they both got the same slip of paper, but they refer to very different deaths.

By the way, just bought the anthology for my Kindle. Thanks for introducing me to it!

PresentPerfect
Author Interviewer
#14 · 114w, 6d ago · · ·

>>1255791

A benefit to writing crossovers. :)

Ezn
#15 · 114w, 4d ago · · ·

Dat cover image.

Nicely improved from when I checked it out on /fic/. Very cool stuff, PP -- I'll admit to liking this story more than one or two of the ones in the original collection.

I'm a Dinosaur Comics reader and unsuccessfully tried to write something for the second volume when submissions were open last year, so props for succeeding at writing another take on the concept. MLP certainly gives it an interesting flavour.

#16 · 114w, 4d ago · · ·

I haven't even started yet, but seriously, thank the lords of Kobol that someone gets that indents and paragraph spaces do not mix...

Back later!

*reads*

Right!

PP, that, was legendary. Sure, I get that the style may have been taken from other similar stories using the premise, but it's rare that I find short stories on here that actually achieve so much with so little. If I were to hold up an example of how to do a short story, this would be it as of today.

It's positively dripping with emotion, it's concise, it conjures vivid imagery. It gives the reader a sense of knowing what's going on (a much needed sense of attachment all too often missing from MLP fics), without them actually knowing anything truly relevant. It adds mystery, without the reader feeling cheated when it isn't resolved. It carries tension sublimely while never explaining a damn thing. And, of course, it carries an underlying observation on a very real issue of perceiving the value of life and death.

If I knew the alt-code for those little starts, I'd give you six on the spot.

Also, I hate you for knowing someone who does pony art. C'est la vie.

-Scott

P.S. You're getting a blog-post for this one PP!

#17 · 114w, 4d ago · · ·

Very well done and effective. I think that "ACT OF WILL" is one of the few things that I'd accept for a cause of Celestia's death, and it creates a lot of dramatic tension by foreshadowing an ominous  future. That it matches Twilight's own is even more tantalizing.

PresentPerfect
Author Interviewer
#18 · 114w, 4d ago · · ·

>>1263434

This comment means a lot. I figure most people are not going to know about MoD in the first place. And yes, not all the actual stories are created equal. (In truth, I have not even gotten halfway through the first book. I wonder if I ever shall...)

>>1263454

Alex is awesome. :D He whipped this up for me in like an hour and a half, based off the actual cover art for MoD. (To wit, the only parts of the original left are the floor/skyline/sky, the X and the manhole.)

Most people tend to give out moustaches here, I've noticed. :B :moustache:

Wait, blog? :O Wut? Link me. If you've got a blog, I should know!

And thank you! :D

>>1264190

You've got the (intended) meaning down! :)

#19 · 114w, 4d ago · · ·

>>1266379 If there is one thing I definitely can't be accused of, it's being anything like 'most people'.  And no, just a regular blog post on here, i'm afraid. I don't think I'd have enough to say to run a real blog! Well, not enough that anyone would want to listen to anyway...

Maybe when i actually finish my story one day and actually start writing something else, it might become more worthwhile.

#20 · 114w, 2d ago · · ·

A wonderfully depressing story! Thank you for bringing Machine of Death to my attention: it seems very interesting!

PresentPerfect
Author Interviewer
#21 · 114w, 1d ago · · ·

>>1276754

You're quite welcome!

#22 · 114w, 1d ago · · ·

Zero feels, zero creepy feelings. Letters... why?

Bleh.

Loved the concept, but the execution did pretty much nothing for me. Sorry, Pres.

#23 · 114w, 1d ago · · ·

>>1280102

If you're interested in other stories with the same concept except told with humans: Link to Machine of Death pdf ebook

It's an actual book, it's free, and it is fantastic.

#24 · 114w, 1d ago · · ·

>>1254425 You shall be snu-snued by the most beautiful women. Then the large women. Then the petite women. Then the large women again.

#25 · 114w, 1d ago · · ·

>>1255654 They were killed by some guy named William?

#26 · 114w, 1d ago · · ·

Now I want to read the book...

#27 · 114w, 1d ago · · ·

I got MoD on my kindle when it first came out, but I burnt myself out trying to read all those stories at once. This makes me want to go back to the book and read the rest. Or maybe even try my hand at a MoD story (though that's honestly unlikely).

I very much enjoyed the story and thought it was well executed.

As for Celestia and Twilight, my thought would be that they actually both have the same kind of death, and the machine isn't using it's... unique charm in this instance. It makes sense that imortal Celestia wouldn't die so much as she would simply choose to not live anymore (though the distinction is probably lost on the MoD, it is just a machine after all). As for our purple friend, Twilight-as-Celestia's-successor is a common enough trope that I'm guessing the same can be said of her.

#28 · 114w, 23h ago · · ·

>>1283560

That's kind of what I'd assumed as well. That 'ACT OF WILL' means it was either a form of suicide, or murder from a Higher Cause (IE, the Fausticorn/Scriptwriters).

Either that, or the minotaurs are a bigger menace than first thought.

#29 · 114w, 22h ago · 1 · ·

Act of will...Action taken on purpose...Twilight and Celestia's death cards..

....Suicide? :rainbowhuh:

#30 · 114w, 20h ago · · ·

I really wish I had heard of MoD before this, seems interesting.

Anyway, finally, a fic that's just the kind of fic I like! Short, concise, suspenseful, focusing on the emotions and reactions of characters in stressful and terrible situations, while giving just enough of a resolution so one doesn't feel cheated, while not so much that nothing at all is left to think about. Good job!

PresentPerfect
Author Interviewer
#31 · 114w, 20h ago · · ·

>>1284487

Wow, thank you! This is precisely the sort of reaction I'd hoped for! :D

#32 · 114w, 18h ago · · ·

*tests machine, gets slip of paper*  404...

:trollestia:

#33 · 114w, 17h ago · · ·

I pretty much screamed in delight when I realized that this was about the Machine of Death. And I must say-- had this been one of those included in the anthology, it would have been one of the better ones. Very well done.

PresentPerfect
Author Interviewer
#34 · 114w, 17h ago · · ·

>>1284982

Man, I'm so glad this is pulling folks out of the woodwork who actually know about MoD. :D

#35 · 114w, 17h ago · · ·

I've actually started reading MoD because of this. It does not disappoint.

#36 · 114w, 15h ago · · ·

Honestly, it rustled my jimmies. :fluttershyouch: It was so... freaky.

Very emotional and tense. I'm not necessarily the open ended type of guy, but this one got me thinking... real disturbing things. Definitely. :pinkiecrazy:

I love it. You did a good job.

PresentPerfect
Author Interviewer
#37 · 114w, 15h ago · · ·

>>1285636

Thank you. These are all good feelings to have. :3 At least, from where I'm standing.

#38 · 114w, 14h ago · · ·

Looks at linked PDF...

==========================================

[HIV INFECTION FROM MACHINE OF DEATH NEEDLE]

"Well," I thought, "that sucks"

==========================================

^ BEST STORY EVER!!! :rainbowlaugh::facehoof::trollestia:

You did a good job writing this. My jimmies... Dear Luna, they have been rustled!

#39 · 114w, 10h ago · 2 · 1 ·

I think we are all missing the point.  Twilight's card obviously means that she will be killed by Iron Will when he returns for revenge

#40 · 114w, 8h ago · 1 · ·

Does Ryan North know about this?

PresentPerfect
Author Interviewer
#41 · 114w, 8h ago · · ·

>>1287846

Do any crossover media or other IP creators ever know about fanfiction?

#42 · 114w, 8h ago · 1 · ·

>>1287893

Whups, I meant that like 'You should tell him about this, he seems like a cool guy who'd get a kick out of it', instead of 'I must inform him that someone has been STEALING HIS IDEAS'.

#43 · 114w, 7h ago · · ·

You've got me downloading the original and ordering the book online. Congratultions.

PresentPerfect
Author Interviewer
#44 · 114w, 7h ago · · ·

>>1287935

Well if anything, he can be happy with how many people have gotten interested in the book since I

>>1288167

THERE'S ANOTHER ONE :D

#45 · 114w, 4h ago · · ·

very thrilling. i found out about machine of death through this. I've been listening to the audiobook/podcast, and reading the .PDF form their website. needless to say, i'm hooked. i'm a junkie of psychological thrillers and this pushes all my buttons in just the right way. i'm probably going to buy the book as soon as i get some money. please, make more of these. or, if at all possible, maybe hold a pony MoD spin-off competition? i'd love to participate in something like that. if you do plan something like that, please let me know, you'll be making a stupid fat kid really happy.

PresentPerfect
Author Interviewer
#46 · 113w, 6d ago · · ·

>>1289695

I've really got no desire to make more, expand this, or write sequels. I wanted an MLP/MoD crossover, so I made it, end of story.

#47 · 113w, 6d ago · · ·

>>1290712

i see. it's a shame, this is a really good story, and i'd love to see more from it. maybe i'll make my own crossover someday, and be called a an un-creative ripoff artist. lol :P

#48 · 113w, 5d ago · · ·

Oh, curse you and your ambiguity. I couldn't figure out what Twilight's slip said until I realized it (probably) is the title, and I went and looked up "act of will" to find out what it meant and it turns out to be the most vague idiom I could imagine.

The first thing it brought to mind though was suicide, since I think I'd heard the idiom used in that context, and if an act of will is an intentional action, then it would mean death would have to be intentional.

In any case, overanalysis aside, I loved this. Maybe I'll go and get Machine of Death now.

PresentPerfect
Author Interviewer
#50 · 113w, 5d ago · · ·

>>1298996

:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D

Login or register to comment