• Member Since 22nd May, 2012
  • offline last seen Tuesday

Time Pony Victorious


T
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The eccentric pink party pony, Pinkie Pie, plays detective with her lowly loyal assistant, Twilight Sparkle, solving crimes and having a good old time. From thieves, to missing ponies, stolen cutie marks, and insidious plots, there will be nothing Pinkie can't handle!

Chapters (18)
Comments ( 63 )

Commence read,
Didnt actually take me this long to read, but something sparked my interest.
Really good though, I will be looking forward to more from you.

Really original idea. I'll give this a read as soon as I can. I'LL BE BACK :flutterrage:

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Why thank you, I'm looking forward to more input from you and your enjoyment ^^

Oh. So interesting and so good. I like it and want to see more.

I found this very enjoyable. There isn't nearly enough pony detective fiction. We must write more.
I thought your characterization of Vinyl was particularly good.

Wow, this was way better than I expected, I hope there is more on the way.

This piques my interest. Will be following this story.

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I'm glad to pique your interest and hope to keep you entertained ^^

.... This... is amazing.

Like.. absolutely amazing.

Nod to Friendship is Witchcraft aside, I am loving this! But then, I am now filled with so many questions!

If there is no true 'Mane Six' in this alt universe, does this mean there was no Nightmare Moon issue come Summer Sun Celebration?

Did Inky only act like Pinkie Pie so Twilight could take her to Sugarcube Corner? (very much likely)

What caused Twilight to come to Ponyville, if not to both prep the Summer Sun Celebration and find the Elements of Harmony?

I mean, you make allusions to episodic events that happened, like the MMMMystery and such, but if events truly changed, then what, exactly, is the state of things in the world? What changes have been wrought? And does Twilight still send regular reports to the Princess?

I MUST KNOW!

Liked. Faved. Watched. I got my eyes on you.

THIS STORY PLEASES ME! :yay: :pinkiehappy::twilightsmile: a moustache for your awesomeness! :moustache:

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Thank you for the like and I hope you continue to enjoy this story as we progress right along ^^

Sorry, for how long it took for me to respond, and further apologies to how... vague and uninformative this answer is. As a mystery buff, I learned that you can't really reveal too much too early. Everything will be explained later, but not in the way you expect it. Great questions, mind you, but it isn't very significant to the actual story, presently. Later on, the reason why she is sent to Ponyville is explained, very briefly, as is Nightmare Moon and all of that shtick.

And going on with Inky, I actually adored writing her and hope to put her in future stories because I had initially planned for her to only show up the one time. Hopefully, you'll enjoy her as much I do ^^

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Why thank you! Always wanted one of those :moustache: ^^

I'll do my hardest to please you in future installments.

Wow....Inkie or is it Inky? Well anyways she seems like a real...well I won't spell it out but you can get my point. Keep up the wonderful work:pinkiehappy:

Very fun story and I enjoyed it. I think somebody liked a specific episode of Avatar...

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:pinkiegasp:

Somepony recognized the reference! I must silence you!

*fires confetti at you*

Darn it Pinkie, I told you to reload the party cannon every time you use it!

Now THAT was cute! A nice little scene, to be sure. Of course, now I cannot wait to see the back story.... I must know how Twilight came to Ponyville if not to prepare the Summer Sun Celebration! After all, if some OTHER pony were writing Pinkie's tales of logical deduction and Twilight came across them, it would be one thing, but Twilight herself is. No... instead something else brought the Student of Celestia to the peaceful(?) town of Ponyville.Celestia hearing of Pinkie's feats and thinking Twilight would benefit from learning her method? Possibly, but unlikely, since Pinkie's own sister not only does the same, but lives in Canterlot... unless of course, the point was to move away from Canterlot, out of her comfort zone so to speak.
Hmm... that can be a possibility, but for now there are far too many unanswered questions. The most important of which is the Nightmare... AHA! Clever... I may be leaping at assumptions so I can jump to conclusions but... mayhaps that IS the reason she sent Twilight to Ponyville. Early. To make friends (a nice head start for sure) but also to give her the skills required mentally to be prepared for whatever is to come, ie Nightmare and the like. The biggest issue, of course, is that one of your Elements is a generous thief, the other her accomplice, another unaccounted for save for a brief mention, and the last constantly on the move between Ponyville, Canterlot and Cloudsdale.
Still, in the end I'm only grasping at straws, keep up the good work ^^

Hello! This review is brought to you on behalf of the group: Authors Helping Authors

Name of Story: Pinkamena Diane Pie: Consultant Detective
Grammar score out of 10: 6. Your sentances feel stillted and awkward, some feel to long and need to be broken up with a comma or related punctuation. Your dialogue also fails to engage me.
Pros:
Intesting concept—PInkie Pie the great detective in an alt universe where things are slightly different.
I love large chapters—more for your money, and shows that an author has skill at writing.
The whole alt. universe was an unexpected twist that I rather enjoyed. I love a good alt. universe story.
Cons:
In order to make Pinkie appear smarter, you have dumbed down Twilight. In the mystery murder episode, Twilight acted as intelligent as always, she just alowed Pinkie to take the spotlight in order to develop as a character and a person. Here, it feels like Twilight is not acting as intelligently as she should, and is instead allowing herself to be dragged around by the nose by "Pinkie Pie, Greatest Genius Evar!" As a result of the above, Pinkie is feeling a little Mary Sueish, and comes off as a little too perfect and unlikable, whilst Twilight feels slightly OOC.
Twilights infatuation with Pinkie was layed on a little thick and felt heavy handed.
Rarity was unmasked too quickly for my taste.
Notes Section
Overall, you have built a solid concept for a story—an alt universe where Pinkie Pie is Sherlock, and the varied. However, weak grammar and a Pinkie who is too good at whatever she does ruins my ability to enjoy the story—even sherlock had his failings. Twilight doesn't act so much as a foil, but as a wall for Pinkie to make deductions to, and has very little impact upon the story. Idealy, they would be working together, but I am just not seeing that.

I'd recomend fixing the grammar first—that will drasticly increase the readability of the story.

Hope you enjoyed your review! Please help me out by looking at my story: http://www.fimfiction.net/story/51682/my-little-evangelion

Ohhh the plot thickens...just like a lava flow cupcake with chocolate fudge sauce, and trust me on this those things are dense and can glue your teeth together if you eat too much at once :pinkiehappy:

Indie Authors brought me here.

So you have Inkie Pie taking on the role of Mycroft.

I am liking this series.

Hey, looks like another mystery! I can't seem to find any real detective style mysteries that actually challenge the reader to solve them, so I'll definitely be giving this a read soon. I read and write way too many mysteries for my own good, so I'll enjoy this~ :raritywink:

...Gilda X Derpy? That's a new one. :derpyderp1:

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One of the first stories I read on this site featured a Gilda x Derpy pairing. Originally, I was going to choose Rainbow Dash but decided against it because I like Derpy a little more :twilightsheepish:

A good first glance into this new world you're creating. I found the personalities a bit off, but I just summed that up to it being an AU. So no foul play. The important part was that the story was overly enjoyable. And I'll be sure to read more! :heart:

A cute little scene that really lightens the mood, after the family drama of the last two chapters. And nice to see Twilight's ego get knocked down a peg, only for Pinkie to help her companion feel better again. Plus, what can I say? I'm a sucker for a good Twinkie Pie, and mixing Sherlock Holmes with it just makes it even more entertaining.

Okay, now I'm going to have to look up Derpy/Gilda to even see how that pairing would work out. XD

Another great case! I must say, i'm starting to like your portrail of Rarity MUCH more than the original. I like how she's pretty much turned into a Catwoman-esque character. Villian, yes, but she can choose when she wants to be the hero and when she wants to be the criminal. And, oddly enough, her generocity is shining through way more. I think it also shows just what kind of pony she is, when she does crimes to help others.

Anywho, I'm rambling. Another enjoyable chapter. i'll be looking forward to the next one.

Frankly, these two chapters feel like they don't belong here. They break the pacing, mood, and setting. The rest of the fic is wonderful, but this seems out of place and I can only hope the Doctor won't become a regular cast member.

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They are meant to be a sporadic, almost random, but they coincide with a larger plot point that will be addressed later. It is intentional, initiating the, frankly, sporadic style of The Case-Book of Sherlock Holmes and even both the volumes of the Sherlock Holmes collection as per Dr Watson's style. The narrative between each short-style has little rhyme or reason.

It is entirely intentional, thank you for your interest, however, and I hope you enjoy further installments :twilightsheepish:. The chapters with the Doctor will be addressed in the future :raritywink:

3353642 Sorry, I think you misunderstood me. I get that style. I meant that using the Doctor broke the pacing, not that your writing style did :P

The rest of the fic is very good. It's just that the Doctor breaks completely the suspension of disbelief :P

3356755

The Doctor has a certain role to play but it will not be regular. In fact, his next appearance will be his last.

Okay I'm going to make a wild guess and say that the romance tag is for Twilight x Pinkie Pie. Am I right?

3483334

You must have some detective skills of your own :pinkiehappy:

But there are fleeting moments of romance between, well, a bunch of side characters. But yes, since the story is in Twi's POV it will generally be focused on them.

3483366 Well I just know how the site works is all:twilightsheepish:

Yeah that isn't my ship, which kinda makes me feel disappointed:ajsleepy:...mostly because I yearn for a Sherlock crossover story that DOESN'T become a ship fic:ajsleepy: (trust me it's not you, it's me...I swear:twilightblush:)

3483375

I'm not sure how well I am able to convince you, but I hope to keep this purely a mystery fic, as a Sherlock buff I try to focus on the detective work (which is harder than you think when you're keeping it PG). The ship is merely a side-thing.

3483395 Yeah I guess it's just over expose to shipping that's made me react very negatively to shipping in stories that are so obviously not shipping stories...:ajsleepy::twilightblush:

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Yeah I understand, I hope the shipping here won't repel you, I try to stick to the mystery.

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:o

Creeepy :twilightsmile:

On the other side I enjoy a good Twinkie so I guess you sadly can't win.

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It's all about balance and moderation, in my opinion. Shipping is good and all but if it overwhelms the main element (in this case mystery) then it gets out of hand.

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I agree there.
Some stories just try to cram the Ships down your throat, and others just toss it in out of nowhere. It's very distracting.

(Well, this is unexpected.)

This story is well writen qnd very finely paced, and apparently GypsyPinkie is CANNON, YES!:pinkiehappy:

"You are funny!" she noted, "Why on earth would I give you this lovely treasure?"

"Because you know, as well as I do, that you didn't steal Princess Platinum's tiara."

Rarity frowned and, with levitation, opened her bag and showed the tiara to us. It looked exactly like the piece we saw earlier; same jewels. It was the same tiara.

"You need to get your eyes checked, darling."

Memories of Ace Attorney......

Dat Leroy Jenkins reference tho...

I love this, but I wish there was a version like the BBC Sherlock series :heart:

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