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HopelessPotato
Joined November 2011
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HopelessPotato
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63w, 5dDoctor Whooves
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Rarity mentioned that Fluttershy still knew some "people" from when she was a model. Is this a typo, or is Lyra going to have to investigate? I'm going to guess it's a typo. Also, referring to "I" in the first paragraph was a little odd, since your narrator isn't a character as far as I know. You should probably try to avoid that.
Anyway, great chapter aside from that. I do enjoy a good Doctor Whooves story. I'll be watching this.
Because of the fact you said "Green light" that means it's Eleven's Screwdriver. So is this Eleven into Twelve? In other words this doctor is the Twelth. Small nitpick: He would probably hate custard as like with apples when Eleven, he hated something he used to like. Different tastebuds and all that.
I would say Twilight just going along with Doctor just doesn't make sense, but by Doctor Who standards it actually does. How everyone just kinda accepts what he is saying for the most part and follows him around.
Yeah he would be the twelfth doctor, different taste buds do make sense. However, the doctor used to like fish custard. Now he likes daisy custard. The "sadly he could not find any fish" was me breaking the 4th wall. I like doing that.
Thanks for the feedback,
Your timey wimey friend
Exciting series, actually! Of course Twilight would get roped into this, Magic and Science whatnot. Strange how Twilight lets a Stallion into her home without question, hasn't she heard about rapists and thieves? She's only met the guy for crying out loud! Then again... The Doctor's other companions followed him without question... 
Yup, all the companions are crazy! 
the plot thickens!
Really, an entire high tech army with access to weapons lost miserably, but some ponies with cakes beat them without any deaths 
lol...was sort of interesting at first. But the characters are just too agreeable. Wouldn't Twilight would be hounding The Doctor for all the information she can get out of him. (Stuck on him like glue, literally)
Most fics portray ponies as not being inherently violent, would they really cheer all the sudden when the doctor destroyed these unknown creatures? How does Big Mac know to run on sight from the Daleks? (He tends to be rather neighborly) If you were in a total panic, would the first thing that pops into your head be "grab a camera?"
I'd suggest getting to know your cast better.
Duly noted. I'm trying to finish this fic up in a timely manner (excuse the pun), as I have some other ideas I want to work on. However, being a busy high school student doesn't give me much time to write so i can only handle one fic at a time
. To be honest im horrible at exposistion and im working on it. In future fan fiction I plan on excurciatingly painful amounts of exposistion and I will show the cast in a more realistic sense.
Please excuse any errors. Im typing this from my phone.
Lemme name the monsters i know
Vashta Nerada (second favorite)
Weeping Angels(My favorite)
Slavines(or is it Slamines)
Ood
Silence
Dream Lord (not really a monster)
Living Plastic
Daaleks
Those Rhinoceros Things (forgot the name)
SATAN. (Yeah that's right. The doctor killed Satan)
Still trying to remember the rest. I have a type of memory where if I get reminded of something just a little bit, I remember it all. Anyways, just something for Supermunchor
>>159909 well i think youve done a pretty impressive job. although im probably getting some things confused with the other Dr Whooves story im reading, but there doesnt seem to be much im missing. teh doctor'z personality seems cohesive and natural for some sort of time travelling reincarnating alien guy, and the timeline problem with celestia is also sense-making. (course, im good at understanding time travel, so it might just be me, but i doubt it). it all seems pretty much great. so good job! 
>>160261 i recently (like yesterday) heard what weeping angels and slavines (or whatever theyre called) are. creepy stuff. then one of my friends posted a fb status that said that the statue of liberty is a weeping angel, but someone's always looking at it. and thats even creepier.
>>163410 yeah, never said anything about an alternate universe; even from a different planet, constellations will appear differently, because of your view-point and perspective in relation to the stars making those constellations.
AND KNOWING IS HALF THE BATTLE
i like the story so far but this last chapter felt a little off the main issue that i saw was with these three sentences,
With six new companions aboard his stolen Time-Space Vessel he set off for the most logical destination for their first trip; Equestria, approximately 1200 years ago, when it was first founded on Hearth’s Warming Day.
“I was originally planning to take you to a planet called Earth, but I received a distress signal from this point in time and space. I can see why they would be in distress. This is a nasty blizzard.”
So Equestrians have encountered them before? I fear we may be at a temporal turning point in Equestria’s history. Quick, Twilight, you’re the most Equestrian history savvy, what point in time could we be at?”
the first sentence gives us the destination and implies that the doctor knew where he was going and that he had planned on going there from the start.
now this isn't bad he did get a crash course on equestria's history from luna in the last chapter so he could know about the founding and what not, but the other two sentences that i listed contradict this, now if you ask me the best way to fix this would be to have the doctor start the trip to earth, then receive the distress signal and go check it out and then when they arrive have the doctor check the scanner to find out where they are giving them the information that its equestria 1200 years in the past. and the only other thing i had a minor issue with was that you didn't make it clear as to weather or not the doctor made sure he was intervening at the right time i mean just to be clear this is the event that lead to the founding of equestria if the wendigos leave too soon it could have serious repercussions. i'll leave it at that since i have no way of know if that was your intent or not.
"Rarity had to drag Twilight passed the massive London Library."
"Passed" should be "past".
“If it’s supposed to be scarred of pots banging around, what’s it doing in the big city? Shouldn’t it be scarred of all the noise?” Rainbow Dash asked.
"Scared", not "scarred".
Thanks. I always seem to maae tha passed mistake. However the scarred thing probably has to do with the adventure map I played that day. The word scared kept getting misspelled as scarred so it probably stuck in my mind. I'll fix those when im back at a computer.
I know what BAD WOLF is. BAD WOLF is the entity that Rose Tyler transformed into when she absorbed the time vortex. Every BAD WOLF warning throughout time and space was left for The Doctor by the BAD WOLF entity, which having absorbed the time vortex, had or still has control of time and space. Either bringing his attention to something which he will unravel and reveal or giving him that last little mind spark that he needs to cook up a plan to save the universe once again.
So maybe the BAD WOLF entity left this message for The Doctor so that it would bring his attention to the Timber Wolves and get him thinking.
If tl;dr - It's a plot device, deal with it. 
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