The Soul of a Pony
Chapter 7: The Student
"Is everything ready?"
"Yup! I've got the streamers and the balloons, Applejack's bringing the cake, and Fluttershy has the presents. Are you sure you and Rarity can keep them busy while I set everything up?"
"With my moves? I could keep 'em watching for days!"
"I don't need days! I only need an hour! Actually, it'd be more like fifty-three minutes. Fifty-one if I rushed. But then I might mess up, and I'd have to fix things, which might make it take as long as sixty-two minutes, which—"
"I get it. Don't worry. Like I said, we have it covered."
"Awesome! This is gonna be the most super-surpriseriffic surprise party ever!"
"I hope so, with how long we've been planning it. Anyway, I've got some weather jobs to do, so I gotta dash. I'll see you tomorrow, Pinkie."
"Bye Dash! Don't be late!"
"Twilight? Are you all right?"
Twilight shook her head, clearing away the last vestiges of the soulgaze. "I'm fine," she answered, and was dismayed to find that her voice cracked. She tried again, this time with better success.
Fluttershy didn't look convinced. "Are you sure?" she asked. "You look a bit... upset."
"What do you mean?"
"You were, um, crying a bit."
Twilight brought a hoof up to her face. There was a line of moisture down her cheek, confirming what Fluttershy had said. Well, that's new, she reflected. I wonder what—
Her line of questioning was abruptly interrupted by the second phase of the soulgaze. Information rushed into her head, drowning out any other thought. As it had done four times previously, Twilight's spell gave her a sudden. deep understanding of the pony before her.
Fear, in one form or another, was the guiding force in Fluttershy's life. Heights, darkness, dragons; she was scared of so many things, and went out of her way to avoid them. She stuck to what was safe and familiar, and it took a great deal of pressure before she would try something new.
Fluttershy was, as her name implied, shy. Other ponies terrified her, and she couldn't stand the thought of being watched or judged. It was a crippling fear, one that shaped everything she did. She secluded herself from the world around her and lived mostly in isolation, with only her animal friends as company. When she had to go into town, she finished her business as quickly as possible, keeping her head down and avoiding crowds. Though she had recently, with help from Rarity, begun to open up slightly, it was still very rare for Fluttershy to so much as speak in public.
Timid though she was, Fluttershy was not weak. When push came to shove, she was one of the fiercest ponies around. The pegasus had an inner strength, ready to be called on should she or her friends be in danger. Given the proper motivation, Fluttershy could perform amazing feats, from staring down a cockatrice to outflying Rainbow Dash, the fastest pegasus in all of Equestria. There was no question that, once she'd finally managed to overcome her fears, nothing could stop her. It was this, paradoxically, that scared Fluttershy the most.
The only thing the canary pegasus feared more than social interaction was herself. She'd seen what her other, more aggressive side could do, and she hated it. Freed from her normal inhibitions, she'd hurt other ponies, even her own friends. The pain she'd caused was more than she could bear, so she did everything she could to keep herself in check. This was part of the reason she was so nice and submissive to everypony; it was atonement for the pain she'd inflicted.
The other reason for her kindness was her enormous capacity for empathy. Fluttershy couldn't stand to see anypony be sad or hurt, or especially scared. She'd been there, and she knew how it felt, so she did what she could to make sure nopony else went through the same thing. It meant that she often gave praise where it wasn't due, or else refused to question another pony's actions, but it was worth it if it meant she could make them feel better.
Fear, strength, and kindness. Everything that Fluttershy was, it began there. Twilight saw, and she understood.
"Twilight? You're crying again."
"Huh?" Twilight snapped out of her trance, Fluttershy's voice bringing her back to reality. "Oh, sorry," she said, wiping away the tears with the back of a hoof.
"Are you... are you sure you're okay?" Fluttershy asked, her voice filled with concern. "Was it the soulgaze? It was bad, wasn't it? I'm sorry..."
"What?!" Twilight exclaimed, making the pegasus flinch. "Are you serious? It wasn't bad at all! It was amazing!" She took a breath, calming herself down. "Fluttershy," she said, gently, "you have nothing to be afraid of. Your mind was one of the most beautiful things I've ever seen." She paused. "There's a sentence I've never said before," she commented wryly.
That got a nervous chuckle out of Fluttershy. "You really mean that?" she asked.
"Of course. I could tell you about it, if you want."
"Oh no, that's okay. I have some, uh, animals to take care of anyway, and I wouldn't want to keep them waiting."
"Oh, I'm sorry," Twilight said, mentally scolding herself. Once again, she'd put her own needs ahead of her friend's. "I didn't mean to keep you from your animal friends."
Fluttershy hurriedly tried to explain that she hadn't meant to imply that Twilight was intruding, but the unicorn interrupted her before she could start hyperventilating.
"It's fine," she said. "I should probably get back to the library anyway. I'll see you later, okay?"
"Okay," Fluttershy agreed. "Bye, Twilight."
"Bye, Fluttershy." Twilight turned to leave, and took a few steps before stopping. "Fluttershy?" she said, not turning around.
"Yes, Twilight?"
"Thanks."
Fluttershy's cottage sat on the edge of the Everfree Forest, about as far from the rest of Ponyville as it was possible to be without actually being separate from it. The walk from there to the other side of town was not one to be taken lightly, and by the time Twilight reached the towering tree she called home, the afternoon had given way to the evening. The normal activity of Ponyville had begun to wind down, the ponies wrapping up their business and getting ready for a good night's sleep. It being summer, the sun was still out, but it wouldn't be long before it, too, turned in for the night.
Owloysius was already awake when Twilight walked through the library's door, perched on top of a bookshelf. He gave a hoot of greeting on seeing his mistress return. "Hello to you too," she responded, before letting out a yawn. She was completely exhausted, both mentally and physically, and couldn't wait to climb up to her room and collapse on her bed. She felt like she could sleep for weeks.
The same could not be said for her young assistant. Spike, filled with the excitement so common to young children the night before an important day, was making dinner in the kitchen. Twilight could hear his happy humming through the doorway, and decided that sleep could wait until after she'd eaten. "Spike," she called, "I'm home."
"Cool," came the response. "You're just in time; food's almost ready."
Isn't that convenient, she thought. Still, at least she wouldn't have to wait very long. Sleep was calling her, and she was finding it harder and harder to resist.
"How'd it go with Rarity?" Spike asked, once they had begun to eat. "You were gone all day; did something happen?"
Twilight finished her mouthful of food, chewing slowly as she considered the question. "It went..." she started, not sure what to say. Her first encounter with the fashionista had been an unmitigated disaster. Twilight doubted she'd ever be able to forget the look of pain and betrayal that had been on Rarity's face, or how much her accusations had hurt. At least she'd been able to apologize, and their friendship would certainly recover with time. In addition, it was that mishap that had given Twilight the opportunity to soulgaze both Applejack and Fluttershy, and so put that whole issue behind her. "It went well," she declared.
"That's good," the dragon replied. He leaned in conspiratorially, lowering his voice to a whisper. "What was it like? Was I right?"
"Spike," Twilight scolded teasingly, "that's her business, not yours."
"Oh, come on!" he complained. "Please? I won't tell anyone!"
"Sorry, but I'm not telling." Before her assistant could object again, Twilight added, "Maybe later. It's just been a really long day, and I really don't want to think about this stuff any longer than I have to. I'm just glad this is all over."
Spike made a show of grudgingly accepting her explanation, but he knew that he would get the full story eventually. Twilight always told him everything; all he had to do was be patient. As he resumed working through his food, something about her sentence made him do a mental double-take. "Did you say something about all this being over?"
"Yes, I'm done with soulgazes," Twilight answered. "I've used the spell on everypony now, and—"
"Everypony?" he interjected, a note of panic entering his voice. He wouldn't put it past her to have gone overboard with yet another psychic spell.
"Oh, you know what I mean. Fluttershy, Applejack, Pinkie, Rainbow, and Rarity. Not everypony in town." Spike gave a small sigh of relief, as Twilight continued, "Anyway, once I've recorded my observations, we can put this whole ordeal behind us." She yawned, then added, "I think I'll leave that for tomorrow, though."
"Speaking of which, what did you want to do for the eve of the Summer Sun Celebration? I was thinking, since we don't have to organize everything this year, maybe we can take the day off," Spike suggested. "You know, just enjoy the summer weather, hang out with friends, sleep in..." He trailed off, imagining his perfect day.
Twilight yawned again. "Right now, sleeping in sounds pretty nice. Here's hoping we don't have to deal with another world-threatening disaster, like Nightmare Moon." She paused, having just realized something. "You know, come tomorrow, we'll have been living in Ponyville for two whole years."
"Yeah," Spike agreed. "It's crazy how fast it went."
The next morning, Twilight woke up once again to the sun streaming through her window. That's two days in a row I've slept in now, she noted, resolving not to make a habit of it. With a yawn and a stretch, the librarian climbed out of bed and walked over to the mirror on the wall to begin her morning routine. It started with brushing her hair and generally cleaning herself up (yesterday's events had reaffirmed the necessity of this step), followed by breakfast, then she or Spike would set out food for Peewee and Owloysius. While both phoenixes and owls were predators by nature, ponies had long been able to make alternative foods to meet their dietary needs, and it was this that Twilight poured into their respective food bowls. After that, she brushed her teeth, and then the day could begin.
Twilight's schedule for today was largely empty, and what few things were on it weren't especially time-sensitive. This was partly a result of the lesson she'd learned after her dabbling in time-travel, but mostly because even she recognized the importance of taking a day off every once in a while. It being the eve of the Summer Sun Celebration, and the second anniversary of her move to Ponyville on top of that, made today perfect for a bit of worry-free relaxation.
So it was that the lavender unicorn spent the entire morning curled up in her study, nosing through whatever books struck her fancy. Interruptions weren't an issue; even at its busiest, Golden Oaks Library rarely had to deal with more than a dozen or so customers in a day. Ponyville was only a small town, after all, and the lack of a major university or academic institution beyond a primary school meant that there weren't many ponies in need of research materials. Add in the fact that today was both a holiday and a Friday, and the library probably could have stayed closed for all the business it would see.
After Twilight had devoured the complete text of The Comprehensive Compendium of Canterlot Coinage—rather wordy, but fascinating all the same—her thoughts turned to the events of the previous couple of days. She'd experimented with a new field of magic, and the laws of scientific discovery dictated that she must make a record of it. The unicorn pulled open a drawer of materials, telekinetically lifting out the supplies she needed to make her report. A quill and ink pot joined a set of fresh scrolls on her writing desk, adding to the clutter of notes and reference books already covering it. She unrolled one of the scrolls, weighting it down at the corners to keep it flat, then picked up the quill with her magic. Dipping it lightly in the ink, she set the nib to the paper, and began to write.
The spell itself was the easy part. Twilight had already exhaustively calculated and catalogued the mechanics of the spell two days ago, which she diligently rewrote, adding in her observations of the mental fatigue and headache that followed each soulgaze. After three scrolls had been completely filled with dense notes and formulae, the librarian began the much more difficult task of describing and analyzing what she'd actually seen.
How could she explain it? There didn't seem to be words that could express the powerful emotions those visions had provoked. Joy, despair, rage, and, above all, intimacy. She'd seen all her friends as they really were, stripped of any false appearances or affectations. It wasn't really the sort of thing that lent itself well to the dry, clinical world of academic discourse.
Lunch came and went, and the afternoon quickly made its presence known, and Twilight still hadn't made any progress in her report. As the pile of failed starts grew, so did her frustration, until she was about ready to slam her head down on her desk and give up. Fortunately for the integrity of her cranium, a knock came at the door.
"Hi Rarity!" Twilight greeted upon opening the door and seeing her guest. "What brings you here?"
"Hello Twilight," the fashionista responded amicably. "And hello to you too, Spike."
Sure enough, as soon as he'd heard the name of his crush, the baby dragon had rushed to the door. "Hi," he said dreamily.
Rarity gave him a smile, before returning her attention to her fellow unicorn. "Are you busy at the moment?" she asked.
"Not really. I'm trying to write a report on the, um..." Twilight hesitated; sure, she and Rarity had made amends, but talking about the soulgaze with her still seemed incredibly awkward. "On some stuff," she said, lamely. "It's not going well. I can't figure out what to say."
"I've certainly been there before. Sometimes I'll just get stuck on a design for ages, waiting for inspiration to strike. I find that it often helps to leave it alone for a while, and come back to it with some fresh ideas. As it happens," she said, and Twilight could tell that she was coming to the real reason for her visit, "I may have just the thing you need. Rainbow Dash has been pestering me all day about some new routine she's been working on, and how I simply must see her perform it. I don't suppose you'd be willing to accompany me?"
"I guess so," Twilight answered. In truth, she had no desire to get back to writing. Maybe seeing some death-defying aerial stunts would do her some good.
"Can I come too?" Spike asked excitedly.
"Why, of course you can," Rarity told him. "Come along, Rainbow won't wait forever!" As the party of three began to walk over to the field that was to be the venue for their friend's performance, Rarity hung back slightly. Unseen by the other two, she turned her head back to the enormous tree that was Ponyville's library, and winked at one of the bushes by the door. A pair of bright, blue eyes within returned the gesture, and then Rarity quickened her pace to catch up to Twilight and Spike.
"So?" Rainbow asked, fluttering back down to the ground. "Was I awesome or what?"
"'Awesome' might be pushing it a bit," Twilight teased. As ever, the pegasus's flying had been spectacular, but to admit that would be to stoke her ego even further.
Rainbow stuck her tongue out in reply. "Whatever, you know I'm the best."
At this point, Spike chimed in from his perch on Twilight's back. "Hey, where'd Rarity go?"
Twilight looked to her left, to where her fellow unicorn had been standing to watch the performance. She was nowhere to be found. "Huh, I dunno. She was right here a few minutes ago." This, Twilight was sure of; Rarity had been cheering just next to her when Rainbow pulled off a delayed triple-axel corkscrew spin, and that hadn't been that long ago, surely. After that had come the Flaming Flip, the Amazing Aerial Acrobat, the One-Mare Death Spiral...
Maybe it had been longer than she thought. And, now that she thought about it, Rarity had been awfully quiet during the second half of the performance. Had she slipped away while Twilight was focused on Rainbow? "Did you see her go?" she asked the pegasus.
"Me? Did you see the sweet moves I was pulling off? I wasn't really paying attention to what my audience was doing." She shrugged, then said, "Maybe she left her sewing machine on or something."
"Maybe," Twilight said, frowning thoughtfully. Something wasn't right here, but she couldn't quite place it.
Before she could try to figure it out, Rainbow spoke up again. "Hey, thanks for coming to watch me and everything. I'm gonna head home now; you probably should too."
"It's not that late," Spike commented, but Twilight shook her head.
"No, Rainbow's right. We really shouldn't leave the library open with nopony in it." They said their farewells and headed their separate ways. Rainbow took off at her usual, reckless speed, while Twilight set a much more sedate pace.
Before long, Twilight and Spike reached their tree/house/library. As the librarian opened the door and stepped into the darkness beyond, she suddenly became aware of three very important facts: first, that when Rainbow Dash had flown away earlier, she had gone in completely the wrong direction to get home. Second, that today was the anniversary of a very special occasion in her life, and yet Pinkie Pie had thus far failed to make an appearance. Third, that she was currently staring down the barrel of a ridiculously large cannon.
Reacting purely on instinct, Twilight dove to the side, just as the cannon released a thunderous report and filled the air with... streamers? "SURPRISE!" five ponies shouted together (one of whom was rather lacking in volume, if not enthusiasm). The lights switched on, revealing all of Twilight's friends, a large cake, and a banner emblazoned with the words, "TWO YEARS IN PONYVILLE".
Pinkie Pie jumped out from behind her party cannon, positively beaming. "So?" she asked, expectantly. "Whaddya think?"
"I think my ears are bleeding," Twilight groaned, getting to her feet.
"What is all this?" Spike asked, slightly dazed. He hadn't been as quick to react as Twilight had, and he'd taken a direct hit from a burst of confetti. As Fluttershy flew over to him and made sure he was alright, Pinkie launched into her explanation.
"It's a party!" she said enthusiastically. "We've known you for two whole years! It's like a birthday! Well, except that nopony was born today. Okay, some ponies were born today, but that's not what we're celebrating."
"It's wonderful," Twilight said. "Thank you all for doing this; it means a lot."
"Aw, it's nothin' special," Applejack said. "We just wanted to show y'all that we're happy to be your friends."
Spike, having mostly recovered his balance, asked, "Hey, why the second anniversary? Why not the first?"
"We had planned on celebrating your one-year anniversary, of course," Rarity explained. "But after that, ah, altercation with Discord, we were rather distracted."
"So now it's a party for two years instead of one," Pinkie finished. "That means we have to have twice as much fun to make up for it! Come on, there's no time to lose!" Before she'd even finished talking, the confectioner leapt over to Twilight and grabbed her by the hoof.
As she was dragged away, Twilight couldn't help but smile. Here were all her closest friends, having worked tirelessly together just to make her feel welcome. There was Pinkie Pie, chattering away about something or other even as she pulled Twilight over to where she'd set up Pin-the-Tail-on-the-Pony. Applejack and Rainbow Dash, arguing over the latter's sleep schedule. Rarity, talking with Spike about one of her orders, and the rare gems she'd had to procure for it. Fluttershy, standing off to the side and listening to the music. Five completely different ponies, all of them friends.
In the past two days, Twilight had used the soulgaze on each of them. The whole time, she'd thought the spell showed everything there was to know. Clearly, that wasn't true. It was only now, seeing them all together and enjoying themselves, that Twilight finally understood. The soulgaze only showed their most basic traits, the beliefs and ideals that drove them. Their personalities, their little foibles, the things that made them laugh or cry—everything that made them individuals—were left out.
No spell could capture all the intricacies of a pony. To suggest otherwise was to display complete ignorance of the way relationships worked. Only by talking, playing, laughing, and fighting could one pony ever hope to know another.
Pinkie Pie, Applejack, Rainbow Dash, Rarity, Fluttershy, and Twilight Sparkle. Bearers of the Elements of Harmony. Heroes and saviors of Equestria. They were more than that, though. Above all else, they were friends.
BEHOLD! 'TIS CHAPTER SEVEN!
Wow, this took a disproportionate amount of time. Over a month to type 3,715 words? I'm ashamed, frankly. Interestingly, it was getting back to classes that really enabled me to finish writing. I don't know why, but that's how my mind works.
No soulgaze this time. It just didn't fit thematically with the chapter. Oh, and don't worry; as conclusionary as the last few lines here might seem, this isn't the end of SoaP. The next, final chapter ("Reality") has yet to come. Really, though, I see it more as an epilogue. The plot, inasmuch as this story has one, is pretty much done now. All that remains is to wrap things up and close off a few loose ends.
Stay tuned.
EDIT: Whoops, apparently the first chapter is actually the last one. Fixed. My bad.
You're not letting us see Spike's soul? Damn it, I was looking forward to that.
I wonder if Twilight could possibly find a way to cast the soul gaze on herself, perhaps with a reflective mirror or something?
Aw. so cute!
I loved this story. Fantastically written! Good job.
omfg I'm first
I'm never first
...or not.
Rarity has to be the one to soulgaze Twilight -- she earned it.
yay. I liked this story
Huh...
My immediate reaction on seeing this is that it should have been called "Windows to the Soul." Something about that picture I think.
Ah well, more reading to do~
This was a very interesting character study. With the amount of thought that appears to be put into this story, I'm not surprised it took as long as it did. Regardless, DON'T DO THAT AGAIN!!!
I was thinking a way to let everyone else see her soul she saw theirs let them see hers.
I hope you're going to have Twilight tell the others what she saw in their minds. Especially Rarity, I think she'd like it, the others would too, it could be a beautiful bonding experience for them all.
I read all the chapters in one go, and this is one of the most well written stories I have ever read.
Is ever twilight going to look into her own soul?
1709528 fuck her own soul, Celtia's the real deal. just wonder how it will be given she is an immortal. twilight could even end up insane, after all there is no ruler which all actions are all kind and fair.
1708835 This is still incomplete?! What else is gonna happen?!
1708963
This is totally what's going to happen. Rarity is a unicorn and Twilight left the spell report out in the open.
It is my headcanon that the only reason Twilight is so fucking overpowered is that she's the only unicorn to actually study 25 hours a day for roughly 10 years, and any unicorn that puts the work into learning it can use any spell.
1708835 I want someone to soulgaze Twilight!
I want to see her soul! I want to see what keeps her up at night, too frightened to go to sleep!
Don't short me a chapter on Spike's soulgaze, man. I'd love to see how you interrupt him. Sarcastic, practical, and fun loving, show us the good stuff man. Loved Shy's too.
1708846, 1709991
I won't do a soulgaze on Spike in this story. My reasons are complicated, but it just wouldn't work. Maybe, at some point in the future, I'll put up what Spike's soulgaze would look like.
1708859, 1709528, 1709979, 1708963, 1709821, 1709116
Okay, since I evidently didn't make this clear: yes, Twilight will be 'gazed. I had planned to do it in this chapter, which is why it has the title it does. No, Rarity will not be the one doing the 'gazing.
Chaos Knux, to my mind, has a point; why else would the ponies have spellbooks at all? Even so, as Twilight said in "Boast Busters", some magic comes more easily to a given pony than other magic does. As Twilight is basically the Red Mage, it stands to reason that she'd have the most natural aptitude for spells.
1708874, 1708990, 1709018, 1709526
Arrgh! All these compliments aren't helping! I need criticism, for pony's sake! STOP LIKING ME SO MUCH!
Nah, but seriously, thanks a ton. It's your continuing support that has kept me writing this thing.
1710161 Well, I hope so
Gizogin, you should know that I'm a terrible, horrible, awful, mean-as-a-jealous-Luna person. If I could find something inherently wrong, I would have flooded a bloody spotlight onto it.
1710161 I would give you criticism, if there were anything that needed criticism. Serioulsy, I have not a single complaint about your story. It is a very well written yarn, and I am looking forward to more!
1710161
If you want criticism, how about that there isn't really a conflict in the story. She soul gazed her friends. So what. Put her in a situation where she needs to use her new knowledge or skill, maybe a sequel. This was more like a description of an event and results of an experiment than a tale, which is great if that's what you were going for, because you write in the style you used really well. But a story without a conflict is hard to read. It was very interesting to read about the inner nature of the mane 6, but I find that I am more involved in a story when I can root for the good guy or, in some cases, the bad guy. Still, if you were going for the kind of story it turned out to be, we'll done, because you pulled it off beautifully.
How was that for criticism, even though I am sure there points have come up before?
1710265
Perfect! You've dashed my hopes and left them dying on the floor. Well done.
I jest. You raise an excellent point, and it's one I'm well aware of. I didn't really set out to write a story, as such; it's a character study, loosely tied together with narrative. I wanted to explore the personalities and motivations of the Mane Six, and this seemed like the best way I knew to do it. It's not for everyone, I admit, and if I'd started writing it now, I would have done it differently. So thank you for your criticism; it shows that you care.
Love it!
1710358
Not sure if someone else said it, but Tales of a Wizard: Flesh Masks is really good too.
I wonder if the Soulgaze can be used on a mirror, to "see" oneself...
1710161 It's way simpler than it sounds. Basically, it lets Twilight see just how much Spike has to put up with on a daily basis, and that he only does it to keep all his friends happy. Twilight then sees how mature and selfless Spike really is, and that you really don't know what you have until it's gone.
There are about a thousand other reasons, so i'm sorry to say that this excuse isn't going to cut it.
2.asset.soup.io/asset/2692/6386_4558.gif
(I wonder how many that use this know what movie it's from?)
1709821
Nein. It's been said that most unicorns only have a little magic, and it's usually only related to their special talent/cutie mark. What that statement implies is that while all unicorns are magical, they don't have much magic-capacity, and generally don't have much magical understanding.
Rarity doesn't do much magic, but from what we've seen she is a much higher grade of spellcaster than most unicorns are - she was probably the best in Ponyville before Twilight appeared.
Most unicorns only display telekinesis, and that's pretty much it. It's not that they're all wizards, it's that they all naturally have the ability to levitate objects like a spectral appendage they're born with. I imagine it's a spell that requires next to no understanding or is completely instinctual.
With a low magic capacity, they couldn't do much more than that in the first place. Then the fact that since they have all the magic they need to use in their conceivable lifetime - telekinesis is very versatile - they have no need to research and decipher magicks that they can't even use in the first place, and would have no use for even if they could.
However, given that Twilight's special talent is magic, and she has a wellspring of magic inside of her second only to the divine beings of the series, there should not be any other unicorn capable of truly matching her in ability regardless of how many hours they put into the books. As the rule goes, Twilight is the exception - she is never the standard.
Hypothetically speaking, I kinda wonder what would happen if Twilight tried to soulgaze a duplicate pony from the mirror pond...
Nice work. Such lovely sentiment from Sparkle.
I'm copying these to Word so I can read them without Internet connection, and I can't help myself from looking forward to the end after copying each chapter >.<
Oh my goodness yes. This updated.
Argh. Gimmie Twilight soulgaze. I need it. For my soul. Anyway. Thank you. I am terrible with character development, and this helped me understand the mane six better.
I really liked this.
I dislike the concept of Twilight soulgazing a couple of ponies without them really knowing what it is because it's so invasive, but this fic was pretty great.
EDIT: Bookworm 917 has it right.
1711147
Haven't a clue, wish I did actually.
1719568 Citizen Kane.
I think bookworm917 had a valid point in that conflict (beyond Twilight's guilt at using the spell without permission) would have made for a more engaging read, but I don't think it was really necessary for the story to have it. Mayhaps this spell is something that will be useful in a future fic with conflict though.
Overall, I like the story, and the soulgazes seemed to be well thought out for each of the characters. Your final couple of paragraphs added extra insight and depth in a way that was just awesome. Nice work.
Ok you made me cry a little at the end
//dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/Rarity_lolface.png
When Twilight told Spike: Her mind is her business, not yours.
Even though they got everything straitened out, I couldn't help but think:
how hypocritical
Where you said "So it was that the lavender mare...", the words so it was that the don't sound right in the way they are write. May I offer you use "So that was how the lavender mare..." or "The rest of the lavender mare's morning was spent..."
Other than that, it was good and I am off to read the next chapters.
1749277 Not really, at that point she'd learned a lesson and realized that she was wrong. To be a hypocrite she'd still have had to think that she was right. A hypocrite is someone who tells other people to do things they don't believe in, or that contradict the standards they hold themselves too.
1750879
"So it was that" is rather fine, actually. A bit anachronistic, sure, but otherwise fine.
I think.
I'm not sure about the tense expression. But I usually go with my gut on these things, because it knows English better than my head does (and by "my gut" I rather mean the collective, mostly subconscious or otherwise not actively remembered knowledge I've acquired from everything I've seen, heard and read - usually expressed by "feeling right").
I would've prepended it with an "And" - "And so it was that" sounds better to me. Perhaps "And so it came to pass that" would've been even better.