Simultaneously able to type 94 wpm and still take five years to finish a story. If you're feeling generous, throw a ko-fi at me.
Maybe someday she'll learn her lesson, Twilight thought. But Trixie never did. And now, a few years into the future, she's coming back; but this time with an army at her disposal.
Luckily, if there's one thing Twilight knows, it's how to be prepared.
She has two weeks.
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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Cue training montage of Twilight and Spike preparing parchment, sharpening quills, collecting ink, stocking up on cupcakes, and putting on headbands. Because in every preparation montage, somepony puts on a headband. Headbands are cool.
...I should put a headband on my avatar....
1) I think of all the options he thought of, this would be the scariest.
2) I only wrote in four intentional innuendos for Derpy. If you found five.... you need help. Also, I almost made Dust Dancer's departing line, "I have to pee on her," but I wasn't sure how many people would get it.
3) Better question... how did she combine the terms “orange” and “door hinge” into a workable sentence?
(that's the only exception I can think of. If you have another, post it in the comments and win... well... nothing, really.)
4) DELETED SCENE: Twilight recaps their successes.
Deleted because didn't really add much to the story, just fluff.
Twilight turned to face the gathering of ponies in the library. It was dark, as she had placed dark curtains over all the windows to hide their activities from any prying eyes. Spike sat high on a chandelier full of candles, expertly lighting each one that went out with a quick burst of flame.
She cleared her throat and the murmur died. Most of it, anyway. “Phase one was a success,” she began. “Special thanks to those in step three, codenamed estrus cycle; especially Pinkie Pie and Berry Punch. You girls did wonderful work.”
Pinkie grinned widely. “I do what I can!” she said happily.
Berry grinned as well, though a bit more unsteadily. “I put my pants on.”
Twilight decided to skip that particular response and continued. “I believe I can safely say that Trixie will be overconfident and that soldier morale will be dipping by a factor of at least...” She realized that some in the audience were not paying attention to her, but to a certain teal unicorn cuddled so closely to a blushing cream-colored earth pony mare that they looked a bit like Siamese twins. Lyra was kissing her cheek repeatedly, and being none too discrete about it, either.
“Lyra! You're distracting others,” Twilight said.
Lyra looked up and pouted. “I can't help it! I need my fix of mareflesh! That stallion today tasted like dust. I don't want my lovers to taste like dust!” Her voice dropped low and sultry as she leaned against her friend again. “I like them to taste like sugar.”
Twilight hadn't thought that Bon Bon could get more red, but she was mistaken. Ah, the downsides to having a light colored coat....
A small flash of purple later, and Bon Bon and Lyra found themselves on opposite ends of the room, having just been on the receiving end of a teleportation spell.
1) I write by setting up the characters in my head, and then letting my imagination “run the simulation”. The problem with that is, sometimes the ponies do very cute things unexpectedly. This was one of those times. Luckily, my roommate was home and he knows CPR, and so was able to start my heart back up again.
2) At least, that's what I thought... until I read this.
3) I will let the reader decide what Angel Bunny did to be on the wrong side of the stare.
I don't care how many times I see this, it sends shivers up my spine every time I do.
4) When I wrote this scene, a song popped into my head; which I then wrote down and recorded. I suppose this means that my writing inspired my song. I'm not sure if I should use an Xhibit meme or an Inception meme.
...No meme, because my memes are bad and I should feel bad? That's an option too, I guess.
I love this story! Keep writing, and keep up the good work!
Scumbag OP:
>says Twilight has two weeks to save Ponyville
>doesn't update for a month
Author's notes:
1) Do you know the Rule?
2)Deleted lines (deleted because reasons and didn't flow): Lyra looked up hopefully. “Top is good, right?”
Previous conversations ran through Rarity's mind, and she coughed nervously before answering, “In this case, yes.”
3) ...but can she see why foals love cinnamon toast crunch?
4) This was played for laughs. Note lack of romance tag. Unfortunately, sometimes what I think is funny, isn't. Ah well.
Part of me is worried that most of this story is just ping-pong dialogue. Thoughts?
*looks at the title* aw shiiiiiiiiiiiiiit.
*finishes* PREPARE THE ARTILLERY!
1840854
All hooves on deck!
1840880FIRE AT WILL
I love it. Even more. Nice job.
MOAR. PLZ.
so i gusse there not going to use matchlock guns in tixie army, becasue if she have gun to the griffon kingdom and got there weapons and uncons was useing them i bet ponyville is doom.
2704250
Nope, nothing like that in this universe. Just brute force.
2704261 i look at the pic and theres 21, are there more in her army, becasue if that's it than twilight win she out #
2704275
Yeah, Trixie has a lot more in her army. More than live in Ponyville. But Twilight is smarter, so she's going to win.
2704285 saermter mean not a win all the time, look at the romans they was high tech with steel technlge and weapons that make ohters look like noting but they lost to a goupe that out # them by 10 to 1 that use battle tacks that is burtle.
the battle of the roams vs the barbarians, and gusse what the barbarians won out in the end.
That what i think this battle maybe like twilight is book samert but is she battle saermt. Tixie how ever been on the road way more the twilight ever did, so she have battle epx under her.
Remmber tixie was a show ponie wiach mean she have to think fast and think sermt at the some time not like ok i do this type of fast i mean think fast like 10 out comes if i do this kind of.
i love reading battles of the old and new, twilight is book saermt with battles she mest have read on books of war, but tixie mest have done more than reading a book, for crying out load she have a god danm army.
Twilight Sparkel you Magnificent Bitch! That's a compliment for the record.