Action, adventure, ponies and the joys of flight!
A hero is sent to Equestria knowing only that he will be needed to save them in some way, no clue as to what he'll find, and certainly not expecting to be turned into a... well he's a pony...
His powers, his spirit, and the friendship he gains there will be stretched to their limits as he finds that even in the most peaceful land there are those who seek to rule by any means.
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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Wot.
77944
Wot wot?
Mooooooooooooooooooooooooore....
79518
After the holiday, I get the week off, time to write. Thanks for reading!
fantastic
80869
Now you're just over-exaggerating... Thanks, I appreciate it
As soon as you said England I read everything in a British accent.
95745
Good thing too, because I say everything in a British accent. And write it too, if I can help it. You know it's what the American ladies go for, they find it sexy when it's not too overdone.
I like this story take my stars you scallwag
97981
Thanks for the read, I appreciate it, and if you're ever thinking of writing your own story, hit me up for editing and proof reading, I do that usually instead of write my own fan-fics.
Dashie is sad, I am sad
Keep up with the good work
138544
Thanks for the read, and yeah, she's sorta sad, but that's the problem with romance, especially when your friends take things too far without knowing the whole story. The whole 'went on holiday, met a girl that I found easy to talk to, she thought it would go further, had to say no and leave again' story is personal experience, thought it would fit in well here, especially with what's... planned
As long as people keep reading, I'll keep writing
This...is a surprisingly interesting story. Surprisingly well edited and lacking spelling mistakes as well. Your writing style seems incredibly polished as well...
Anyway fun story so far, I'd love to hear more about Nick's world as well. Even if it is outside the scope of this story. You've got my attention with this. Keep up the good work.
138807
Why thankyou, as long as I've been writing, nearly two decades of it, it's still just the same feeling when somebody compliments my work. I'm glad you like the story I'm crafting, and especially glad you noticed the care I'm trying to take in my presentation of it. I also offer editing services to writers of Pony fan-fiction for free (I charge for regular editing
) imagine how clean and readable the work would be if I wasn't putting half my concentration into creating it first... so if you, or anybody you know, might be interested then drop me an e-mail through the address on my profile page.
And Nick's world... ahh if that isn't a story and a half... I've been writing his adventures for twelve years now, no sign of slowing down. Hopefully you'll be able to read it, the comic Haven that I'm working on should be ready to publish... soon? I'm really slow at drawing, but the publishers are interested in what I've given them so far, so as long as they have the opening, I'll deliver the work.
Again, thanks for reading, I'll try not to disappoint you
138849
Ha I knew it! There's no way something this polished would appear on a fanfic site by accident.
However I didn't expect you to actually be a published author! Truly, pony-fandom is amazing, haven't seen that in any other fandoms yet. Also, I hope some people take you up on your offer, I've seen far too many people say "I don't need no stinking editor!" Thank you very much for writing a fic that didn't make my eyes bleed and my intestines try to strangle me
Not much of a comic guy but, you've got me interested.
Also having Raijin and Fuujin named characters? Very cute
"Chaser used Charm! It's super-effective!"
Epic Pokémon reference! Have they been in the Pokémon world too?
139768
It's a thought, but no, not yet ^^ Also, as Kirianna keeps growing on me as a character I have to think less and less about what she'd say in any given situation, it's a lot of fun because her comments have even started to surprise me...
Best bit about spending your life writing? You get so into it that sometimes that what the characters say and do isn't being scripted and directed by you anymore, and their personalities drive instead.
Thanks for reading!
138868
Not a published author yet, I can't stretch myself to quite that much of a boast,
but I have enough articles and fiction material to my name to make a good few novels. Almost tried to get Nick's adventures, Haven, published in novel form, but convinced myself that I needed people to see what I saw. And I do have a trilogy of novels entirely unrelated to any of this lined up for review, you might see them sooner or later on actual bookshop shelves, the first one's called Soul, Light and Leaves, part of the Demon War trilogy (although those are still working titles, pending their review, we'll see what comes out in the end).
And I try to name all my characters, even if nobody ever actually says their names, because it makes them actual characters and not just 'the villains' in my head. Apart from Fuujin and Raijin, who are named for their roles, I've had fun researching names for their culture: 'Margeir', 'Jökull' even 'Fryst Eldi' and the 'úlfur' are a rough translation into a specific language. Try and guess which
Don't let this fic fool you. Thaylien is secretly an evil banana demon from the Alpha Centauri star system seeking to devour our kidneys.
True fax
140929
Curse you! My plan had almost grown to fruition! (Hah, fruit puns...)
Can I 'ave your liver?
140945
Shadowfax
141074
I will consult the council to see what they want in exchange.
141103
You know, thanks to you silly lot, I actually managed to top my best-ever views tally for both daily and weekly views? Well, 's not hard to do, considering I've only had this going for... five weeks now... but still! Thanks for the support.
Whoohooo! I did something without even realizing it. I'm just that awesome
. Teasing aside great opening, though you know if you keep this up you're going to ruin me on other authors.
"Spike made an elegant sounding 'hngk' noise" I think that's my favorite line of this chapter
143004
I try to do that as often as possible to Spike, starting way back in Chapter 1 with his '"Hurgk!" Spike greeted her eloquently', it's the British tradition of poking fun at things by making the opposite statement. Also ten points if you spot the Lion King reference in there too.
95901
...
...
...
WHO TOLD? That was meant to be a secret! It won't work as well if everyone's doing it! *silent rage*
145404
Don't be silly, every British guy knows about it. Trouble is, for the vast majority, they're British guys and therefore do the opposite by overplaying their accents and sounding like posh gits, so you don't have to worry about everybody else. Just concentrate on pitching the accent as juuuuust above 'you have an accent, I can't quite place it' but below 'hey, are you British?' and run with it.
Of course, if you're a true English Gent, like me, you can get away with far more than talking as you'd like. I have something better than an accent, just like Wind Chaser; Charm
Ok either Luna or one of the mane 6 has got to make a trip back to Nick's world after this is all over. Just to turn the HiE into a EoE.
157826
Heh, it's been considered. It's back-burner at the moment, I'll see when things reach their inevitable conclusion.
The idea that I settled on was that Twilight would send a pony (or even all six of them) back and transform them to human in the same way that Nick became Wind Chaser... the tweest of that would be when she bases the transformation off Nick himself. Now our daring hero isn't actually human, he's a transcendant. Pony turns human-ish with super powers they can't properly control (not to mention ponies don't normally wear clothes...); hilarity ensues.
Again, back burner, wait and see
Oh wow, I finally found it!
and I gotta say, I thought initially this switch would be confusing (given the amount of backstory you'll probably end up explaining only very late, if at all), but it ended up being quite intriguing instead! Should have known, given your writing prowess ^^
Wait for me in the later chapters <3
If you'll remember me, I'm Tosxychor, one of the guys that preread this chapter, before it had shifted PoW hehe
Reading through the fic like a hospitalized, ravenous RD!
So that's where the first chapter went! I should have known better... again
I's being very nice so far! 5/5 yays my good sir
184638
My word, it has been a while ^^ And yeah, I've been trying to bring down the wall-o-backstory and keep it in the descriptive, keep it in the moment to moment of the story rather than linger on things that don't actually need to be explored. Nick/Wind Chaser and Kirianna are... well they're a fully grown character in most ways, all of their development is essentially done. Only by turning them into a new character, or throwing them at situations like this (out of their element) can I keep them fresh and vivid in my mind.
So yeah, I'm glad you wandered on in
81213
No really, you have a gift with words. The prose you write is so smooth, and the choice of words, and how the characters are so alive and well-interpreted, and then the.... *looks down*
...I swear, I had my pants on before I started writing this.
But really, the way you write is fantastic. Thanks so much for sharing your gift with the brony community ^^
Done reading with the chapters so far, and howee, what an enjoyable read.
The plot looked 'simple', at least until this chapter's tweest, and it's shaping up to be very promising indeed ^^ plus that revelation in the comments... *shiver*
The characters exchanges you write are beautiful (if memory serves, you also write the best FS and Luna I've seen so far! And I've read quite a bit ^^)
Your writing in general is stupendous, and it flows so effortlessly to the reader's eye, even if it's so elegant where it needs to, and the chapters are just about of the right length ^^
I especially love how you mixed it up with the changes in PoW, and how effortlessly (and often hilariously!) meld Chaser's and Kirianna's thoughts with the actual narrative.
So what to say, this is one of the best fics on this site for sure (I'm just sorry I couldn't give it more than 5 stars...), and I'm waiting in trepidation for the next chapters to be released!
190996
Okay, now I've got a lot to live up to...
But it's true, the way I create stories is simple; first the world they're in, done for me, next the premise, which is the úlfur in this case, and then throw a character into it and see how they react.
What I do is called a 'stone soup' story. Everybody should have heard the old story of a traveller seeking food from a miserly old woman, he can see her larder is full of food, but she offers him a bit of bread and water and nothing else. So he tells her he can make stone soup. To this effect, he puts a pot of water on the stove, adds a common rock and leaves it to simmer. The woman doesn't believe it can be done, and so he suggests maybe a bit of salt, which she fetches. After a little while, he says that maybe it would go better with a few onions. And after that some carrots... a few leeks, a bit of beef stock, and so on. Every thing he suggests, she grudgingly goes and fetches from her heavily-stocked stores, and eventually the soup is a stew that smells delicious. They eat up heartily and are happy and content. After they're finished, the man leaves, but not before fishing the stone out of her soup-pot and telling her that the magic of stone soup, is that you can use the stone over and over again.
Start off with an unusual base, an element that shouldn't usually work, or something to surprise the audience, then add all the elements that make it a story, and you have your Stone Soup story
You are a bad bad man for ending it there
I am so hooked it is not even funny.
200513
I try not to do that, honest! Cliffhanger endings, and dramatic chapter-breaks of any kind, aren't really my style. But at the same time... I over-ran my word count. I was supposed to end this one in under 6000 words (I've been setting myself to keep this shorter than my rambling usually gets), but no... nearly half a thousand words again as big as it was supposed to be.
Also, I guess I'm doing something right with this one, if you're hooked after such a short time. I only started this in January afterall
200793
You're not the only one who's surprised. Chaser reminds me much of a traditional super-hero from American comics and it is probably one of my least favorite genres of all time. So despite getting that feel you have certainly showed me through the quality of your characters and the stroke of your pen!
200803
American?! Oh dear, then I'm doing something wrong
I'm trying to keep this English 
But still, MLP FIM is an american show, I can't help but adopt a bit of that into the mannerisms here, I absorb a lot of my influences by osmosis, so I rarely notice when my style shifts slightly towards what I've been reading or watching at the time. Thus, american super-hero I guess, doesn't help that he hog-tied a wolf with its own clothing during a surprise attack with a silly catch-phrase, then smack-talked the Regent like a b-movie thug. Hopefully the next chapter will provide him with a little more depth, but to be honest, Nick/Chaser has so many idiosynchrasies, and has so many methods of dealing with 'bad guys', that it's often a matter of picking whichever one feels right at the time.
Hope that I don't give off the american vibe too often though, it's just not who I am ^^
200793
Having had a number of British friends I can decidedly say that Nick/Chaser is anything BUT American, just was trying to describe the feel the setting you had him in gave off. Poorly explained super powers, large organization doing do-gooding (it's a word because I say so), it's just has that feel to it.
Actually this chapter more than ever pushes him away from that feeling and puts him onto a more unique footing as far as I'm concerned. Oh and come on! That smack talk was brilliant! I could just imagine the expression on ol' Celestia's face
Oh dear Celestia may I have more?
200950
[Looks up from a quarter the way through Chapter 10] Oh, soon. Soon.
[/looking up]
Brilliant!
It'll be hard waiting for the next update but life comes before fics. I think we can wait patiently for the good stuff
221841
Why thank you, as always. I do hate dropping cliff-hangers on everyone... but darnit if it isn't fun
Haha, here comes the flank-kicking!
), Chaser threatening with gelding (..pffthahaha! ), Cahser bursting through lightning to save RD, but most importantly, the royal guards keeping the jokes about even in the dimmest of situations. Ponies are a very positive and hopeful race, and authors seem to forget that oh so easily when trouble and/or grimdark sweep the pages; you instead managed to convey that precisely, and I want to thank you for that 
Definitely two beautiful chapters. The most memorable parts to me were Luna's trance, the weird faces (oh the faces!
Also, strange as it sounds, you're the first I read about that mentioned Rarity being initially from outside Ponyville, and that's quite a feat mister
Cannot wait for you to submit your story to EqD, you deserve every view that it will bring you!
224003
'All it takes is a little hope.' If you can get that sentiment right, then you've got the best adventure filler sections for this kind of story. Also, you've gotta love making silly faces at ponies, especially as a pony (pony faces gurn better!), although I'm pretty sure that Chaser might be leaning towards the Renegade side with confluttershying Fluttershy. Can you imagine her adorably confused face? I can. It's epic levels of cute.
Ah, but I think I might have confluttershy'd you as well, that part about being from outside Ponyville was supposed to be from Twilight's perspective, and Rarity was simply the prompt for them to stop and talk rest for a bit (nopony expected her or Twi to keep that kind of pace up for as long as they did). After realising that writing from the perspective of Dash, Twilight, Chaser and Kiri, Princess Celestia, Princess Luna, and Fuujin and Raijin already... that was the probable limit. There might be a few scenes featuring the important bad-guys, but I won't be writing from the perspectives of the other four mane six.
In any case, I need to get on with the next chapter, Chaser's hurt and alone and... well, I don't like leaving him that way! I need to at least write him better, then I can rest.
I don't get nearly enough well written pony-fied battle stuff for my tastes. This is exquisite! I can't wait for gratuitous beatings to follow!
245439
Oh, it's coming. Believe me, it's coming. I'm going to enjoy pitting pegasus against wolf again, this time without our hero having to jump through lightning to get there. Chaser, uninjured and ready for them...? They're going to regret the day they tried to terrorise Equestria.
"...úlfur guards thudding together like furry corks at the end of their chains." God I love that imagery.
Much better job this time around
375426
Thank you, glad you think so. It's great having a reader who's able to call me on my silliness. It proves that no matter how long you do something, there's always something new to learn, and someone who will turn your ideas over and make you rethink.