I write the occasional pony story. What else could possibly matter?
Rarity is at her wits' end. Try as she might, she can't come up with an idea for her charity fundraiser. But Applejack can, and now she has to convince Rarity and Fluttershy to take part in the last thing either of them wants to do.
Well, that was a very pleasant surprise! Wonderful storytelling, spot-on characters and a rather unique idea. I very much hope this is not your last fic, for I look forward to reading more of your work. I take it this isn't your first work, though? Otherwise, you have some amazing editors.
The look into Fluttershy's head deserves special mention for being adorable, hilarious and emotional at the same time. Also, that ending! Now if she only realized she could combine the virtues of singing and wrestling via epic battle music...
On a related note, now I can't stop thinking of a world where academic institutions deliver public lectures from fleets of airships. Obviously, Heidegger seminars would be improved by 200%.
All in all, a very good show, sir/ma'am. I applaud you.
This fic had me giggling and chortling the whole way through.
bravo, a very good story and a pleasant read
keep it up
A very nice read indeed! I laughed quite a bit in this one, keep up the awesome work!
Thank you all for your kind words. As a many-time starter, but first-time finisher of any kind of story, your comments are very welcome to me. I may have to work up the courage to try it again!
@alfalfamonster I did indeed have some amazing editors and reviewers who can't be thanked enough. The community of accomplished MLP:FiM writers astounds me. Their generosity in sharing their time and talent with a struggling novice is a big part of the reason this story is here.
Bravo! A masterpiece!
This is absolutely fantastic, stunned to see this without more comments or a higher rating. The bit with the pigs had me cracking up entirely
I liked it a lot! I enjoyed your writing style, and you nailed the characters. I was impressed with Fluttershy's thought process about losing a part of herself, but forcing herself for the sake of her friend's happiness. And the final bit about gaining confidence was awesome!
I was wondering, how many bits did the charity get from the ticket sales?
I love it, it's great! Now we know what MLP:FiM would look like if Vince Russo became one of the writers.
How did the charity make out? Well, let's see. If we start with the gross ticket receipts and subtract out the cost of printing posters and tickets and the cost of renting the balloon from Canterlot Aeronautical Services, we find that the charity cleared: a bunch. Let's just say it was enough that Princess Celestia is seriously thinking of asking Rarity and Fluttershy to participate in charity mud wrestling matches all across Equestria. No good deed goes unpunished.
This is an absolutely delightful story!
One-shot, 'Normal', episode-like stories are my favorite subset of MLP fanfic, and this one *easily* ranks among the best of them I've read. It's got just the right mix of humor and heart to really be a great read. The characters were spot on, the "get in their head" segments were both entertaining and insightful, and the story flowed smoothly from start to finish. Well done!
This is your first fic? Seriously? You could've fooled me, this is very well-done.
Amazingfulness! I could clop to this, but it's so well-written that I don't want to! Perfect characterizations, excellent premise, hilarious bits o' comedy... I tip mah hat ta you! Well done!
Thank you. I'm glad you all can't see me furiously blushing behind my keyboard.
This story reflects the contributions of more people than just me. Please read the acknowledgments at the end. If you enjoyed the story, then the folks named there deserve your thanks.
Couldn't put the story down, eh? It sounds like you might have preferred my working title, "Dirty, Dirty Ponies".
My God this was amazing!
How long have I read this for? Let's see, it's 1:05 Am now....ad I started reading at around Midnight? Yea.....
Also, I loved how you made Fluttershy go all out 'Badassery' mode during the fight....it started to get a little creepy picturing what happened in my mind while I was reading it
All in all? Loved it
SHUT UP AND TAKE MY BITS!!!!!!!!!
This needs to be sent to the story writers and turned into an episode. I don't know what the lesson is, but who cares?
And to wrap it up...A-MAZ-ING bucking job.
Bitches don't know bout my swagger.
Crazy original story, well written, keep up the good work.
This was really good. Very MLP like. I'd like to see more from you.
Loved the pigs bit. I've always wondered how pigs live their life, and now I know.
Absolutely loved this.
Now I want to read a story were Celestia and Luna somehow start to mud wrestle with each other.
EqD brouth me here and im hapy it did its hard to get a picture of this storys on this site but EqD aint got a searg section im glad i got to read this piece of art W>.<W
Mind = Blown
Luna and Celestia mudwrestling??? SHUT UP AND TAKE MY BITS!!!
A good story, can't believe it's your first one, well done
this is Fluttershy --->
this is Fluttershy + sad bunny
I'll admit it's not easy to get me to read fanfiction but I read this and I thoroughly enjoyed it. I'll be sure to keep an eye open for any of your works in the future, this stuff is amazing!
Now do a fic involving something hilarious with Celestia and Luna.
I have to admit, I looked at this and thought "This looks like a tawdry clopfic. I really shouldn't click on this."
Best exercise of terrible judgment ever.
I haven't read a comedy this nice in quite some time. I remember when this was on Ponychan, and I'm glad to see it finally delivered on its potential.
Thank you. Considering the source, this is high praise indeed.
I'm deeply indebted to the Ponychan community for the time and constructive criticism they invested in this story. It was my great good fortune to have Vanner take me under his wing, and while his demands were sometimes exasperating, he pushed me to turn out the best work I was capable of. I would like to think I did justice to his efforts.
A lovely story
I liked the part about pinkie!
but she was all like
And i loved EVERY SECOND OF IT
This...this right here is a perfect example of how to do comedy right. Bravo, 5 stars!
On a side note, do not even think about abusing baby bunnies while Fluttershy is around...she will end you.
Chocolate. This needs to be Chocolate.It is said with such wonder and revelation. Forget Fluttershy gaining self confidence this is the true moral of the story.
This was a great read.
"Since Big Mac slipped cleanin’ out the septic tank." Poor, poor Big Mac...
Great story, loved it and had a great laugh reading it!
Ponies and Mud wrestling? BRILLIANT!
If I'm not mistaken, the story from the point of view of the pigs seems to be inspired by "Animal Farm" by George Orwell.
Hmm. Could be, but if so, the influence wasn't a conscious one. It's been a long time (longer than I have any intention of confessing to) since I read the book. But I still have it and will now have to dip back into it. Actually, there are some other weird connections I've discovered only after the writing was complete ("The Manchurian Candidate", anyone?), so who's to say that "Animal Farm" isn't one more?
I have to say that I've loved the comments that people have posted both here and on the "Equestria Daily" blog. Everybody seems to have their own particular discovery, and they're all different. That pleases me no end.
I love your language, both the dialogue and descriptions. This story spends loving detail on errant nonsense in a quite delightful way. Faved.
Thank you. The MLP:FiM world is a joy to write for, and spying on the residents of Ponyville has been a lot of fun.
"... loving detail on errant nonsense..." That compliment is a keeper, and I cheerfully accept it on my story's behalf. Perhaps I have a little Pinkie Pie in me. She may be random, but she's very, very serious about her randomness.
This was a very good story. Well written, great pace, and rather hilarious. I about lost it at the mental image of Fluttershy bulldozing Rarity into the mud at the start of the match!
Thank you. I'm afraid I am a little hard on poor Rarity. At the beginning of the match, I run her through about every intense emotion known to ponykind (short of romantic love) in a time of about ten seconds flat. (Sorry, it had to be said.) I do like to think that she and Fluttershy get a little of their own back from their trainers in the concluding scene.
aww~ I finally make a FimFic account to follow some of my favorite stories and a bit sad to see you don't have any other stories before or after this episode worthy story =(
Are you ever planning of writing more stories?
Funny you should ask. I am just making my final edits to a story called "The Write Stuff", starring Rainbow Dash and Twilight. Here's the pitch:
"Rainbow Dash may be Equestria's Best Young Flyer, but will she crash and burn when she puts pencil to paper?"
Needless to say, things go less than smoothly for RD, and she gets to feel some of the emotional highs and lows that I've experienced as a fledgling writer (and a few of her own which I hope never to share).
I still need to run the piece through Ponychan so that they can beat it up and tell me all the things I need to fix to make it presentable in public. Meanwhile, I need to bug my go-to guy for cover art. The upshot is that it will be a little while before the story goes live here, but hey, think of all the hipster cred you get by knowing about the story well ahead of the rabble. Remember, you heard it here first.
And, by the way, thank you for both the comment and the watch.
I love the description oif the pigs little rose tinted world. That was very creative. Also, Big Mac has cronies? What an entertaining thought. This is a pretty unique fic all together and it wrapped up quite nicely.