Rainbow Dash writes her first novella. It's a very serious book about serious topics. She asks her friends to proofread. This should go well.
Chapters (2)
shortskirtsandexplosions
Joined 28th Sep, 2011 ·
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Sounds about right.
That title. Are you sure you haven't been replaced with a Super Trampoline alt?
🅱
Ah, the trusty, "If I'm not good at something immediately, it must not be what I'm good at." I never leave home without it.
Ah yes, a brilliant exposè in the horrors of authorial technique. Brava sir, brava.
"Slice of life"
I'm in this photo and I don't like it
Wait... who wrote this fic again?
wtf is twis response to all his
10139968
Exactly what I was thinking! Even before I saw who authored it I thought just that.
I expected Pinkie to get the inspiration to bake cupcakes... with ample assistance from Rainbow Dash.
Also, had she posted this fic on Furaffinity... it probably would have gotten tons of likes.
Or, if she'd turned it into a Shmentai (sorry, Lord Nuxanor, I must steal your cute little title for Japanese cartoon pr0n), it would have a cult following.
10140058
derpicdn.net/img/view/2019/8/18/2121524.png
Knew I forgot somepony.
I feel like everyone on this site needs to read this at least once. Actually, everyone on every fan fiction site.
10140069 It's okay to forget the perspective of background ponies
10140097 Every new writer needs to read this, and some more 'experienced' ones as well.
"I wanna be defined by the things that I love
Not the things I hate
Not the things I'm afraid of, I'm afraid of
The things that haunt me in the middle of the night, I
I just think that you are what you love" -Taylor Swift
So go on Dash, draw Flash Sentry in the frilliest dress you can imagine. It's not my thing, but I guess not everyone appreciates Big Rusty Meat Grinders
Kind of hungry for soup now. IDK why.
10140058
Who do you think Discord hired to kill Dashie?
10140068
ALL HAIL LORD NUXANOR! 
No it's ghentee-oy, not Shmentai.
Me thinks Rainbow Dash should start drawing cute princesses in pink dresses and flouncy gowns. That would do the trick. Mhmm. I’m running out of material here.
This is so true it made me laugh. Can't even count the times stuff like that happened to me, though I didn't have a friend like Rarity trying to encourage me to continue. Still, damn awesome.
Well it's a far sight better than 'Ponies being slowly being drowned in a horrible magical escapist act'.
It still won't ever beat 'Ponies slowly asphyxiating in space while trying to duel with banjos'.
10140005
To be fair, such a premise has way more traction in Equestria due to the existence of cutie marks.
This made me giggle
Merry Soup is a great name for a pony who gets torture to death in a comedy.
And everyone knows the real reason AJ didn't review the story is that she can't read.
rofl
Are you making fun of Background Pony?
Well. That was something. Moral of the story kids: even when your first draft is an absolute train wreck and your friends can't read it, there'll always be a book horse to help you out.
10140251
10140145
Shots fired!
This tale should be added as a footnote to FiMFiction's Writing Guide.
Edit: Approved for Twilight's Library
This was quite the experience
Is anyone else concerned for the mental state of that poor, abused typewriter?
10139968
Ask yourself, have you ever seen Super Trampoline and shortskirtsandexplosions in the same room? Or Imploding Colon? Or blue harvest? Or Just Essay? Or dayoldspaghetti? No, I THINK NOT!
Because skirts is a recluse who extremely rarely goes to Pony cons.
I'm tempted to write (a much shorter than novella) actual version of this.
10140027
more like "thousands of tiny shredded ribbons of life", amirite?
10140379
"Don't worry typewriter, you're not alive, Rainbow's draft can't hurt you..."
faint clicking noises
10140058
I like to imagine she's secreted herself away in her Happy Library to curl up in a ball, attended by Spike. She could handle the grim and horrifying content – even be proud of Rainbow's vocabulary's growth – but she could not handle Rainbow's bastardization of the basic rules of literature.
It would look something like this:
- MLP: FiM
- Comedy
- Slice of Life
Twilight is restrained, unable to fight back the horrible words that Rainbow Dash is telling her.10140475
"The countless squishy ribbons of flesh that are the physical manifestation of the results of Merry Soup's entire life covered in the glinting deep scarlet of freshly squeezed blood and interspersed with tiny fragments of bones such as the scapula and humerus and femur and tibia and [list remaining 201 bones] with their sharp and broken edges ready to pierce anypony who would touch the mutilated and rended remains that were the material proof of her existence and gruesome end if any such pony brave enough did exist and it would be sad if nopony knew of Merry's grim death as her parents searched and searched and held out hope that their precious filly might come back someday while the torn remains of her corpse rotted in a dark alley never to be seen again and so would her story would never be known though it is hard to imagine what one could learn from examining the results of her slowly being put through a big rusty meat grinder" right?
Sorry. It hurt to write this.
Come back, commas, I love you! You too, periods!
10140567
On one hand the bondage in that story is kind of hot. On the other hand the story is not particularly well written and vaguely racist. So I'm conflicted. It did give me an idea for a RariTwi story though. So, uh, meh? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
epiphany?
she actually gave a book about ponies getting murdered in the most brutal ways possible to fluttershy? your an idiot RD
So basically Dash wrote Rainbow Factory.
Oh nooooooo...
uhhhhhhhhhhhh
okay
I give this fic a "Dafuq did I just read?" out of a possible "shortskirtsandexplosions".
10140050
Still laughing ten minutes later!
Even I thought Pinkie enjoyed that too much...
And I'm the insane one...
Honestly, for me, it's always like this.
Well put, Pinks.
10140599
No, no, I'm pretty sure Skirts knew what he was writing at that moment. Just let it sink in...