Epilogue
"You ready?"
Shawn glanced at Twilight, who awaited his response with a sad little smile. He grinned, trying to lighten the decidedly somber mood of the bare, stone room.
"I have always wanted to heroically ride off into the sunset after saving the day." He paused to think, taking a look around at the small group of ponies that had gathered to see him off. "I do, however, appear to be missing a trusty steed... which one of you wants to volunteer?"
There were a few giggles around the room, some less half-hearted than others.
"It's also the middle of the afternoon," Twilight pointed out. Over the last couple of weeks, she'd gotten more apt at the friendly ribbing he continually engaged her with.
"There's a sun-goddess right here. I think she could manage one little sunset for the departing hero."
Celestia smiled. "I suppose something could be arranged..."
"Sister!" Luna's shocked exclamation startled no one.
The sun princess merely rolled her eyes, glancing over at Shawn and giving him a knowing wink. It was unusually unreserved for the royal, but he'd noticed that she'd been a lot less subtle about her sense of humor... among other things... ever since they'd had that little chat. At least, around her sister and the Elements.
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10 Days Ago
Shawn woke from a deep, dreamless sleep. Already, the comfort of a warm bed, a long bath, and the food in his stomach were causing the... adventure... of the last few days to seem like a strange dream. Yet, the bed was as overly wide as he remembered. The room that had been provided him at the Canterlot Royal Palace just as luxurious. The food...
Oh, that food... Just the thought of it started his stomach rumbling again.
He'd wanted pancakes, but the palace chefs had insisted on providing the triumphant heroes with a full blown personal feast. One that Shawn had taken full advantage of.
Luna had quickly joined them, shooting a grim look toward her tired sister that Shawn could clearly tell bespoke of a coming argument. Still, Celestia's drooping mane and glazed expression seemed to convince the lunar princess to save it for another time, and so she sat down to sullenly pick at her meal.
In spite of the recent victory, every single being in the room stayed quiet. The mood was somber, dignified, and even downright funeral-y.
"This is awful." Shawn muttered.
Twilight's left ear perked up and she turned to face him. "Did you say something, Shawn?"
"No... but someone needs to," he muttered again and stood up, tapping his priceless crystal cup with the solid gold butter-knife that certainly had no chance of disappearing into his pocket by the end of the night. "Ladies, gentle... uhhh... colts, I guess, and ponies with what is probably the world's biggest senior discount... seriously, you two must get, like, 90% off at the Golden Corral on weekdays..."
He was interrupted by a snort of laughter from Celestia, though whether it had been at his comment or Luna's look of undignified affront he could not tell.
"Twilight has something to say," Shawn finished simply and sat back down, looking expectantly towards the mare.
She sat there, ears back in a flabbergasted expression, clearly at a loss for words. "Shawn, that's...! Wha... I-I do? Oh... uhhh... I... uhhh..."
Clapping, Shawn stood back up, "Thank you, Twilight, for those inspiring words. Truly, victory is in the 'I' of the beholder..." He paused to allow the mandatory round of groans to die down, then continued. "More importantly, however, this is not a victory feast."
"It isn't?!" Pinkie shouted, shocked, past a mouthful of some sort of grassy sandwich.
"No it is not, my racially confused friend i-"
"Tribal," Twilight interrupted.
"I'm sorry?"
"Ponies are split into tribes, not races, Shawn." She finished, dryly.
"Twilight, that is incredibly insensitive! I'm very disappointed in you, young lady-corn. But now's not the time... I'm in the middle of something important."
Twilight merely sighed into her gourmet salad, while the rest of the ponies in the room watched in a mixture of amused curiosity and morbid fascination as Shawn continued his verbal tirade.
"As I was saying, this is not a victory feast. It's certainly supposed to be... but I'm not seeing victorious heroes returning from a grand battle! I see a group of bedraggled ponies, some of them really bedraggled..." He paused to look at Celestia, then over to Aegis. "Really, really, really-"
"Spencer." The cap'n growled with a warning tone.
"-probably since birth... or maybe it's all those age wrinkles... you know, you should try smiling mor-"
"Get to the point, Spencer!"
"Right! Bedraggled ponies," he spared one more glance at Aegis' glaring form, "who are too busy thinking about all the bad stuff that happened recently to realize something." Shawn paused to walk around the table, putting one hand on Galdius' withers and the other on Aegis'.
Aegis growled under his breath. "If you don't take your hand off me this instant, you'll be wearing two casts."
Shawn's hand quickly retreated to his pocket as he continued. "The bad guy got beaten and nobody got hurt." He stopped, considering. "Except for lady cappy and Softy. Oh, and all those guards who were in the fighting. And me- okay, maybe I should change that to no one died... well, no one we knew... but we're all together now! That's what's really important here!"
He looked around, noting that the ponies were still mostly staring at him curiously. Sighing at the seemingly unappreciative audience, he finished as simply as he could: "You won! Stop moping like you lost!"
"Shawn..." Twilight started, "that might be a bit of an oversimplifica-"
"No! He's right!" Pinkie, no longer a pegasus, hopped to her hooves. Then continued hopping as she spoke. "Maybe not everything got wrapped up as nice as usual, but we still did it! What everypony needs now is a little bit of smiling and laughing, to make up for all the frowning and constant fear of horrific death from the last few days!"
"Thank you!" Shawn threw up his hands, somehow managing to mix frustration and triumph into one only-slightly-confused gesture.
"I agree," said Princess Celestia from her own seat. Her eyes still drooped with exhaustion, though her tone retained its calm and regal demeanor. "You have fought valiantly, my little ponies, and it is only right that you celebrate your victories."
"Indeed. You all were given near-impossible tasks at great risk and performed admirably, as our sister expected," Luna exclaimed from her own seat, drawing the eyes of the entire room. "It must be nice," she continued, her own eyes locked on her untouched food, "to be trusted so."
Celestia flinched, unable to hide a pained look at her sister's words. Shawn glanced over at Twilight, seemingly the only other one who'd noticed the sun princess' brief lapse of facade, and leaned in. "Wow... awkward," he whispered.
Twilight looked up at him, a slight downturn to the corners of her mouth the only sign of her distress.
After a brief moment of silence, Luna spoke up again. "If you will excuse us, the moonrise draws near." She then stood and calmly walked from the room.
There was a pregnant pause. Then that pause bore its child, which grew up, went to college, got a job, had its own children, and passed away peacefully before someone else finally thought to speak.
"What tha hay jus' happened?" Applejack piped up from her own seat across the table.
"It is nothing to worry yourselves over," Celestia answered, then reinforced with a stern, motherly gaze. "Please continue enjoying your meals. My sister is right... it is time the sun yielded to the moon for the night." Following her sister's example, Celestia then exited the room herself, motioning for her personal guards to remain where they were.
"Okay," Applejack continued after watching the second princess depart, "there is definitely somethin' goin' on he-"
"I must also take my leave!" Shaun interrupted. He would have stood dramatically, but he was already standing, so he settled for merely raising his voice and enunciating every word. "A time always comes when a man must yield to nature, and answer her sweet siren song."
"Ah... whut?"
Shawn threw up his hands. "Geez, AJ, why do you always have to drain all the pomp and mystery out of everything? I'll be right back, I have to poop. Twilight, please direct me to the nearest pooper." He then looked around at the sea of hanging jaws, and realized that perhaps he should probably set their attention elsewhere. "In the meantime... Dash, you should tell everyone about how you totally saved Windy's ass from all those angry griffons during the fight."
"Spencer, I told you not to call me that while I'm in uniform... and I'm the Captain of the Guard, I was the one protecting her!"
"What?! I totally saved your flank at least four times!"
"Really? Because I remember saving yours at least five."
"Well, I knocked out more griffins than you did!"
"Only because you got lucky!"
The shouting match escalated from there, quickly drawing the attention of all the ponies who had been previously staring at Shawn. With a nod of self-satisfaction, he quickly motioned for Twilight to follow as he stepped out into the hall.
Hopefully they haven't gotten too far, yet. To his relief, the thought was followed by the receding sound of heavy, gold-shod hooves striking the carpeted stone floor. Easy enough to follow at a reasonable distance.
A he walked, he turned to find Twilight still staring at him, quite possibly surprised at having followed him on instinct. Ponies and people were funny that way... put a little confidence and authority in your voice and they'd go right along with almost anything you said. Some things were constant no matter which universe you were in, he supposed.
"Why?" Twilight suddenly asked, having finally found her voice. Her voice, of course, currently being a mix of high-pitched whine and horrified gasp.
Shawn considered the question for a moment. "Well, Sparky, when a person who's used to normal food eats too much fiber-"
"Ugh!" She snorted. "Nevermind!"
Whatever Shawn might have responded with was drowned out by a sudden, booming sound, echoing throughout the empty halls and vibrating the lamps on their stands.
"Did... did you hear that?"
"I felt that, Sparky," he responded, bringing a hand to his upper stomach. "Right here... in my cockles."
Twilight rolled her eyes, then spared a concerned look in the direction the sound had come from. Only one pony in the entire city - perhaps the entire kingdom - could achieve such a volume with merely her voice. And she happened to be stomping right back in their direction, as direct and unstoppable as an oncoming freight train.
Shawn watched with a vague sense of mystified wonder as the princess, a curiously flat expression on her face, marched right past them, stopped, then looked back at Twilight.
"Twilight Sparkle," the princess stated the name as if announcing the mare's existence, rather than getting her attention. "You are our sister's most prized pupil, and your advice has proven valuable in the past. I wish to entreat it again."
The unicorn who was the sole focus of Luna's attention whimpered an incomprehensibly garbled response, which must have been immediately taken as acquiescence. Twilight was promptly enveloped in a midnight-blue field of magic and spirited away into the dark depths of the castle.
Shawn blinked.
He looked forward to find only empty, featureless hallway. Behind held only the same. It occurred to him that while he had planned to get Twilight to have a conversation with her clearly distressed mentor, he had also planned on having her around to give him directions back to the dining room. Neither of those plans seemed very feasible at the moment.
More importantly... she'd ended up with the wrong princess.
"Aw, man," he indignantly exclaimed to a nearby lamp. "Why do I always get stuck with the hard jobs?" The ironic echoes of Twilight's final, terrified whimper followed him serenely down the hallway as Shawn made his way in the direction of the distressed flying plasma cannon calling herself Celestia.
A break in the monotony of the carpeting suddenly caught his attention. It was ripped... scorched around the edges, and containing a few chips of shattered stone and gold.
By the looks of it, the moon princess hadn't been the only one to get a little heated.
"Hehe, 'heated'. Hey, Twi-" Shawn paused. "Oh... right." He wasn't sure when it happened, but her presence had, at some point, become almost as natural and assumed as Gus'. In fact, for the very first time, Shawn considered the possibility that the day he went home might be a little... sad.
He shook off the depressing thought with another. I'll worry about it then.
Before he knew it, Shawn found himself in front of a great door. Not great in the sense that it was really well-built, though it seemed to be, but rather in the sense that it was clearly made for something much larger than the average castle denizen. The lack of gilding almost threw him off, until he stepped closer. The door practically glowed... as if the soft, fuschia wood were still alive. The grain and knots themselves formed a series of beautiful, curving patterns, flowing so smoothly that they almost seemed to shift with a non-existent breeze.
Shawn blinked and rubbed his eyes. For a moment, it really had looked as if the patterns had been moving, which - on a world like this - wouldn't necessarily surprise him. No magic there, though. Just really artistic carpentry.
There was a moment's hesitation with his hand before the door as he considered the potential repercussions of his next action. He wasn't exactly the comforting type, to be sure. Though, perhaps the princess might appreciate a distracting annoyance. If nothing else, he knew he could be a decent shoulder to cry on if he just concentrated on keeping his trap shut.
All of this was assuming she wanted a shoulder to cry on. Or to even see anyone. He did owe it to her to try, though, seeing as she saved his life and all. That and she was his only way home... so it probably wouldn't hurt to rack up some brownie points.
Eventually, he knocked.
There was a moment of silence, during which Shawn wondered if maybe the princess would simply ignore him, before Celestia's distinctive voice filtered softly through the crack beneath the door. "Come in, Shawn."
He opened the door, eyebrows furrowed. "How'd you know it was me?"
"Everypony else in the Castle knows to announce themselves after knocking." Celestia smiled from her place, lying sphinx-like on a purple cushion taking up a substantial amount of space in the center of the room. The room itself was surprisingly spartan, with only a majestic-looking fireplace and a banner or two adorning the walls, which were themselves covered in designs like those on the door. Only, these were reminiscent of a cloudy, night sky.
"Huh..." Shawn huffed, unconcerned at the apparent faux pas. "You know, for a princess of the sun, you don't have a lot of day-themed stuff in here."
Celestia's smile turned coy. "Perhaps I get enough 'day-themed stuff' during the day."
Shawn nodded. "Could be... or it could be that you had your room redecorated about... ohhh... say a thousand years ago or so?"
The smile became a frown. "Why are you here, Shawn?"
It was clear that the subject was touchy, and not something the princess wanted to dwell on right at that moment. To Shawn, it was also an obvious tell that she was troubled. Even if he hadn't known her for that long, he had never seen her be that heavy-handed... heavy-hoofed... whatever... when redirecting a conversation.
"Wow... starting out with a heavy hitter, huh?" Shawn paced forward, idly running his hand over engraved, purple stonework. "I mean, why are any of us here? The ultimate question, to which some have wrongly claimed the answer is 42. I maintain, however, that the answer is actually Val Kilmer."
Celestia's exasperated sigh was somewhat ruined by the slight, upward quirk at the edge of her mouth. "Whilst I appreciate the thought, I am not feeling in a joking mood at the moment. Particularly if the joke makes no sense."
"I never joke about Val Kilmer, Princess," Shawn replied instantly, leaning against the rounded frame of the fireplace. "Now, if you're asking why I came to your room specifically, then that's a little simpler: I'm tracking down a notorious arsonist, known for violating noise restrictions and vandalizing perfectly good carpeting. You wouldn't happen to know anything about that, would you?"
Celestia winced, her expression guilty and surprisingly unguarded as she looked up at him. "I... did not think you were all close enough to hear that."
"Most of us weren't," Shawn admitted. "Just me and Twilight."
"Don't worry," he quickly added on seeing Celestia's pained look, "neither of us saw you shouting. Actually, I was convinced it'd been Luna until I saw the gold chips and the scorch mark. Twilight got dragged off by your sister before she got a chance to see them, though."
The Princess nodded, her features losing a lot of the tightness that they'd slowly accumulated since the fight with The Nightmare. "She looks up to me," she stated simply. "I would hate for her to have seen me like that."
Shawn considered her words for a moment, allowing himself to slowly sink to a sitting position in front of the unlit hearth. "I could be wrong here... but I think that might just be your problem."
"I..." Celestia paused, looking thoughtful, then nodded. "Perhaps."
There was a period of silence after that. One that was decidedly uncomfortable for Shawn, who allowed himself to sit there and simply be scrutinized by the brilliant white alicorn. He couldn't tell what she was trying to glean from his appearance. For all he knew, she could be literally reading his mind right at that moment, though he doubted it. She'd shown herself to be far too benign to invade someone else's privacy on a whim.
Suddenly, she spoke. "I envy my sister sometimes."
Shawn opened his mouth, but - for the first time in a very long time - realized he had nothing to say. When it was clear he would not speak, Celestia continued.
"She was gone for a millennium. Had to endure something I would never wish upon the worst of my enemies, much less upon her... but that absence has affected the expectations of those around her. She is... new... to this era. Ponies are not surprised when she seeks their council or makes a mistake. They expect it of her, even, now that they've gotten over their initial fear. Some, like Twilight and the other citizens of Ponyville, have even managed to see her as... as just another pony."
Celestia sighed, laying her head down on her hooves. "She can afford to be weak in their eyes. To occasionally rely on their strength"
"But you can't?" Shawn asked, though he suspected the answer.
"I... do not know," she admitted, somewhat bitterly. "The last thousand years of peace were built upon my strength as a monarch. After... what happened... I became hard. I was in such turmoil over what I had been forced to do that, for a while, I relied purely upon tradition and procedure to guide me. I became the incorruptible symbol that I thought Equestria needed at the time. I became something more than a pony... yet, at the same time, something less. Luna is the only one that remembers me from before I became... what I am. Even Twilight fears and worships me as much as she loves me."
Though her eyes had wandered the room before, they suddenly fixed on Shawn as she continued. "Do you think it's selfish of me?"
Shawn scratched at the back of his neck. "Which bit? That you want others to rely on you less, or that you prevented Luna from helping because you were afraid of losing the one pony who doesn't?"
Celestia blinked. "Both, I suppose."
There was a pause as he considered whether to really think through his answer, or simply barge in head-first. "Yeah, that's pretty selfish," he admitted.
Thinking things through had never been his forte, anyway.
Celestia blinked again. "That is... very honest of you."
Shawn shrugged. "It's why you asked me, isn't it?"
"I suppose it is, at that." Her mouth formed a small, sad smile.
"Now I have a question for you," he continued.
"Oh?"
Pause, for dramatic effect. "So?"
Celestia blinked a third time. "So... what?"
"Exactly."
There was another lull in the conversation as she seemed to mull that over. "I am... not sure I follow."
Shawn sighed. "Look... if you don't want to be treated like a porcelain idol, then you're going to have to stop acting like one."
"I have tried," she replied, "but it is folly to think simple pranks and coy humor can undo hundreds of years of tradition."
The two regarded each other in yet another bout of silence before Shawn spoke again. "You know... I used to hate my dad."
The princess tilted her head, probably startled at the seeming non sequitur.
"I looked up to him as a kid," he continued. "He always had an answer for everything. He was always right. Or... at least I thought he was. Then he and mom got divorced, and I stopped seeing him as this invincible superhero... and instead started seeing him as a work-obsessed screw up that wanted to control my life... that drove mom away..."
"Oh, Shawn..."
He brought up a hand, forestalling her condolences. "Hang on, I'm not done!" His narrow-eyed stare continued until her wings, partially opened from his outburst, settled down.
"Like I was saying... for a long time, I used it as an excuse to screw around. I wanted to be nothing like him, and it must've killed him inside to see me throwing my life away when I could've had any life I wanted. I think he thought he failed me... and, for a while, I thought so, too."
He leaned back, the leaned forward again when he realized he had nothing to lean against.
"That's-"
"Still not done, princess."
A twitch of an eyebrow preceded a sigh tinged with true exasperation as Celestia quieted down again, waiting for him to finish.
"But, somehow, I still ended up finding something... someone... that made me happy. I spend most of my life helping people. Making things better. Being awesome in general and in specific."
Another eyebrow twitch, though this time, the princess chose not to interrupt.
"And... at some point... my dad stopped trying to be my dad, and started just trying to be my friend." Shawn paused, trying to form the incoherent jumble of thoughts in his head into a clear message. "Now that he is, I realize that he never really stopped being my dad in the first place. So, now he's both... and we're both way happier because of it. Even if we do rag on each other a lot... although, you'd rag on him too if you saw the shirts." He barely suppressed a shudder.
Celestia waited patiently after he finished, making sure that he was well and truly done before trying to speak herself. "I thin-"
"Anyway, what I'm really trying to say is that you should just talk to Twilight. Tell her everything, like you told me."
"Yes, I-"
"It'll be hard at first, sure. She might be disappointed. She might even run away with a friendly giant to have a series of whimsical adventures that end up teaching her future children the value of a good story."
He was regarded with an elegantly arched eyebrow as the princess waited once more... this time, giving it more than enough time to be extra sure he was well and truly done.
"You-"
"But if you trust her, then I'm sure she'll turn out just fine. Just like mmmph." Shawn paused, confused. "Hmph phh mmph?"
The golden glow of Celestia's horn highlighted an amused smirk and a mischievous glint in a rosy eye. Using his hands, Shawn felt around his mouth and discovered that it had been quite literally zippered shut.
With a dainty cough, Celestia finally spoke without interruption. "Ahem... I understand what you are trying to say, Shawn, and you make a strong case. Thank you." She paused. "Perhaps I should have more trust in my subjects' strength of character. In particular, one in which I have placed so much faith in the past."
Shawn only glared at her with crossed arms.
"Oh, don't look at me like that... honestly, it suits you quite well."
She tried to stifle a small laugh at his affronted expression, but failed. Which made it all the more startling when he suddenly reached over and did something nopony had dared to in over three thousand years: delivered a sharp flick to her nose.
Celestia stared at him in outright shock, and Shawn wondered, briefly, if he may have overstepped his bounds just a tad. Of course, the thought still did not stop him from gracing her majesty with his most smug smirk.
"You..." Her voice trailed off as her eyes narrowed dangerously, belied by a smirk of her own. "Oh, it is on, now."
His own eyes widened as she stood up and stalked forward, wings out in a decidedly aggressive posture.
I've made a terrible mistake... was his last coherent thought as the ancient room bore witness to its first, although possibly not last, royal tickle torture.
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Shawn lay, panting, with his back against the soft, warm coat of an alicorn princess, whose wing lay idly draped over his front. Oddly, the casually friendly gesture did not feel out of place for either of them.
"That... wasn't even... remotely fair," he wheezed out, wiping at the sweat on his brow with a spare cushion. He wished he could tell himself that he'd given as good as he got, but that would have been a lie too blatant for even him to pull off.
Celestia glanced down at him, shifting the front right shoulder that he lay against and gently shaking her head in a vain attempt to sort out her slightly disheveled mane. "Life rarely is," she replied, "try as we might to make it so."
Shawn nodded, relaxing in the comfortable silence for a while before thinking to break it. "I think I'm really gonna miss you guys."
The wing's hold on him tightened slightly. "I shall miss you as well. All of us will, I'm sure."
He looked up to see the princess looking down at him, another sad smile on her face. "Don't worry. I'm sure you'll find someone else to call you out on it when you're being dumb."
The smile became a smirk. "And I’m sure that this brief respite from your own critics will remain a bright memory to sustain you in the future."
Before he could fully absorb her statement, there was a startled gasp from the doorway, which Shawn realized he'd never actually closed, drawing both their eyes to the shocked, purple mare standing just inside the room.
"P-Princess...? S-Shawn...?!" Twilight sputtered, eyes transfixed on the scene of Shawn and Celestia, both disheveled, one sweaty, lying casually against each other in the dimness of a room with little in the way of lighting.
It suddenly occurred to Shawn how this... situation might appear compromising to casual passerby. "Uhhh... this-"
"Is exactly what it looks like, Twilight," Celestia interrupted him with a serious undertone. "I thought I had impressed upon you the importance of knocking before entering a room, even if the door is open, lest you accidentally interrupt ponies at play."
Twilight's only response to her mentor's statement was to turn sheet-white, mutter something akin to an apology, and promptly slump to the floor, out like a light.
Shawn looked up at the princess, who would have looked serene, had he not been able to feel her shaking from resisting the temptation to laugh. "That was evil. Magnificent.... but evil."
Celestia rolled her eyes and made to stand up, forcing Shawn to stand with her or fall over backwards. "A journey of a thousand leagues begins but with a single step."
Glancing down at Twilight, Shawn could imagine the shattered remains of the unicorn's mental stained-glass image of her perfect mentor lying about in a dramatic spread.
"Heck of a first step," he muttered.
The princess only continued to smile as she picked up her pupil in a gentle, golden glow and set her on the cushion Celestia had previously occupied. "You were the one who instilled the original idea in her head."
This time, it was Shawn's turn to blink. "I did what now?"
The princess turned from Twilight's still form, one ear tilted in a surprisingly quizzical expression. "You do not remember?"
"Remember what? Don't get me wrong, I'm all for taking credit even when it's not due... but seriously, what are you talking about?"
"Perhaps, sister," Luna's voice drifted in from the still-open door, a wry smile on her own face as she peeked into the room, "'tis something else on his world."
"A very real possibility." Celestia nodded, as if Luna's sudden appearance were in no way out of place. "Tell me, Shawn," she continued. "What is the Golden Corral where you come from?"
Shawn didn't think he liked where this was going. "A... buffet restaurant..."
Celestia didn't bother to suppress her giggle. "Well... here, you could also say it is a... buffet of sorts. For lonely mares with a few extra bits to spend, anyway."
"Sister!" Luna chided, seemingly scandalized. Nevertheless, her expression was more amused than affronted.
Shawn's mind took a moment to process this new information. Data was compared, referenced, checked, and double-checked, before conceding that the most obvious conclusion was likely the correct one.
"I seriously could've gone the rest of my life without knowing that ponies have male... dance... clubs," he muttered quietly, only slightly horrified. Although, apparently not quietly enough, as both princess let out little snorts of laughter.
Suddenly, he looked up at Equestria's diarchs. "You're both going to tease me relentlessly over this, aren't you?"
"Thou hast brought this upon thyself," Luna replied, her tone regal.
Celestia nodded somberly in agreement.
"Wonderful," Shawn sighed. "I'm going back to dinner. Would one of you classy ladies like to show me the way?"
There was an exchange of looks, likely conveying an entire silent conversation, before Luna spoke up. "I shall be your escort."
"Aweso-"
"Perhaps we can discuss employment opportunities for you," the night princess continued, perfectly serious, "should we fail to find you a way home. I am given to understand the Corral in the trade district is looking to expand into the Minotaur market."
Shawn barked out a laugh, then glanced at Luna, who continued to regard him imperiously. His laugh gained a note of strain. "I... I honestly can't tell if you're kidding. You're kidding, right?"
She merely arched an eyebrow and walked off into the hallway.
He looked to Luna's sister, who regarded him with an overly wide smile. "She's kidding... right?"
"Goodnight, Shawn." Princess Celestia slowly closed the door in his face, throwing him a wink at the last second.
"I'm not McNab! I have self-respect, you know!" His shout echoed down the halls. If it was heard, no indication was given.
As he turned, nervously, to follow the receding form of Luna, Shawn couldn't help but wonder if that wink was meant to reassure or terrify him. He suddenly paused, eyes narrowing as he realized the full implications of the statement made to him before Twilight's interruption.
“Also... no, you’re dumb!” Shawn shouted at the door indignantly, ignoring the arch look he got from Luna as she turned a corner.
Satisfied he’d had the last word, he nodded assertively and stomped away. Had he stayed, he might have heard a breathy chuckle filtering into the hall from beneath the ornate entrance.
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Today
"Shawn?"
He shook his head. "Yeah, Sparky?"
"You zoned out for a minute there..."
"He was probably trying to think of one last way to humiliate one of us," Aegis cut in from across the room. Despite his words, there was no sting behind the verbal barb. Well, not very much, anyway.
Shawn grinned over at him. "You underestimate me yet again, Cap'n, for little do you know that I thought of that days ago!"
"O' course ya did." Applejack laughed ruefully from her own spot nearby.
"Actually," he continued, "I was wondering where Wavedancer and Softy ended up..." A quick look around the room confirmed neither of his two Cauldron buddies had stepped in while he joked around.
"Oh... Shawn..." Twilight stepped closer, leaning down to casually nuzzle the crook of his elbow in a friendly gesture most of the ponies had settled on. Apparently, being head and shoulders taller than most of them made a lot of their greeting and comfort gestures somewhat more... awkward to perform. "They shipped back out to Cauldron this morning. Rex wanted their help setting up his new alliance with Patrius. Apparently, the griffin's prodigal daughter talked him into cleaning up his act... and the city." She gave him her best reassuring smile, trying to convey the importance of his friends' new task.
"Seriously?" He was caught by surprise by how much it stung. "Not even a goodbye?"
"I don't think either of them are much for those..." Twilight smiled up at him, ears at half-mast.
No... he thought to himself. I guess they aren't.
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9 Days Ago
Shawn looked around the Canterlot palace hospital, its simple, whitewashed interior a drastic change from the dramatic opulence of the rest of the complex.
The princesses had not been joking about their teasing. His morning had been composed of a relentless cascade of verbal pokes and innuendos, varying from the skillfully subtle to the metaphorical pie-to-the-face. At some point, metaphorical had become literal when Pinkie, sensing a prank but not understanding it, indulged in a small prank of her own.
His second shower of the day being done with, Shawn had decided to pay a visit to Soft Speech and Wavedancer. Both Cauldron natives had taken the brunt of the physical abuse dished out by the attacking Diamond Dogs. Well... them and Applejack, but earth ponies were apparently so resilient that only magical healing had been required to get her good-as-new. Something about "drawing on her inherent aethiric vitality field" was all Shawn had been able to remember from Twilight's lecture on the subject.
Whatever the hell that means...
Shawn shoved the admittedly wry thought aside. What it apparently boiled down to was that other natives of Equestria, even unicorns and pegasi, required time as well as magic to recover from wounds. And seeing as the two had repeatedly saved his life over the past few days, it was only fair that he pay them a visit to say thank you.
"Excuse me... umm... sir?"
He turned around to find a small-ish male unicorn - a nurse, going by the white hat sporting a red cross - staring at him dubiously.
"Can... can I help you?" The colt finished. The guy couldn't have been at the job for very long if he was still stuttering at lost visitors. Then again, this lost visitor was one-of-a-kind.
There was a moment of awkward silence between them before Shawn put on his best winning smile and nodded. "You wouldn't happen to have seen an enormous, dour minotaur cow with anger management issues laying around, would you?"
The nurse blinked. "Oh... uhhh... if you mean Miss Soft Speech, she's in the room behind you."
This time, it was Shawn's turn to blink. A glance at the names listed next to the aforementioned door indeed revealed the presence of his large friend's name. By an additional stroke of luck, it also included Wavedancer's. His joy at having that much less walking to do was somewhat dampened by a sudden realization.
"Say... uhhh..." A brief glance at where a name-tag would normally be revealed only an empty lapel, so Shawn took his best guess. "Nursey..."
Man, I am really off my game today.
"How good, exactly, is minotaur hearing?"
The colt opened his mouth to reply, but was cut off by a familiar voice booming from inside the hospital room. "Good enough, little lamb. Get in here, already."
Shawn hung his head, letting out a resigned sigh at the startling level of ironic timing constantly displayed by the universe he'd landed himself in. With a little wave goodbye to Nursey, which the colt reciprocated, he stepped into the room.
"Hey, Shawnee boy," a tired voice called out from the other side.
Wavedancer lay there, in the bed next to Softy's, one of her rear legs in a cast and the rest of her covered in various bandages and bandaids. Softy herself didn't seem to be fairing much better, the absence of any casts mitigated by being almost entirely wrapped up in bandages.
"Oh, no!" Shawn exclaimed to no one in particular. "My friends have been replaced by mummies!" He paused, finger on his chin. "Well... I guess they can't be any worse at conversation."
"Har har," Wavedancer grinned wryly at him. Softy merely gave him a level stare.
Neither was doing a good job at hiding their pleasure at his visit. Whether that was because they were genuinely happy to see him, or that they finally had someone other than each other to talk to, remained to be seen.
Soft Speech crossed her arms. "Soft Speech is not dour. Merely... serious-minded." She nodded resolutely to herself, then motioned Shawn over to sit between their two beds. Now that he was closer, he could see that Softy's was actually composed of two beds rolled together. It still looked comically small with her lying on it.
Chuckling, he complied, pulling one of the spare chairs sitting at the corner of the room with him. "I heard you guys saved half the Elements of Harmony yesterday... does saving national heroes make you national superheroes or...?"
Both let out amused chuckles. "Aye!" Wavedancer chortled. "Surpr-" She stopped and shook her head. "Pinkie dropped by earlier. Signed me cast an' gave us some 'get-well-soon' cake."
"It was actually 'get-well-soon-so-we-can-have-a-you're-all-better-part'," Soft Speech added.
"Part?" Shawn asked.
"She ran out of space on the cake," Softy clarified.
They all shared a laugh at that, which settled into a comfortable silence. Which, in Shawn's case, was a rare type of silence indeed. A large, brown-furred hand landed on his shoulder.
"So?"
Shawn arched an eyebrow. "So, what?"
"Pinkie also told us about you... bein' stuck." The minotaur continued, smiling.
"Aye." Wavedancer nodded her agreement. "It be a sad state, bein' away from one's ship... or 'ome, or whatever..."
Shawn grinned. "Come on, guys. I've got a couple goddesses, a bunch of wizards, and at least one librarian working on getting me home. That makes my chances at least, like, twice as good as E.T's, right?" He paused, considering. "Besides, I've apparently already got guaranteed work, courtesy of Princess Luna."
Soft Speech snorted. "Right. Soft Speech will be sure to drop by with plenty of bits."
His jaw must have unhinged with how fast it dropped. "Seriously? It's been, like, one day! And most of it was night! How the hell did that get around so fast?!"
Softy merely shrugged, the motion causing her improvised double-bed to squeak and groan in the unique, tortured agony of furniture that's holding up several times the weight it was originally designed for.
"Shawnee boyo... this be a palace. An' everypony knows servants 'n patients got nothin' better ta be doin' than gossip. I would'na be surprised if Rex was laughin' 'is little doggy bollocks off at yer... ah... fortune righ' about now." She exploded into raucous laughter. "Like yers truly!"
Shawn caught a brief motion out of the corner of his eye before he whipped his gaze back toward Wavedancer. "Is it just me... or do I detect a hint of distaste for the incredibly skilled staff of this fine castle? Perhaps... one in particular?"
Wavedancer rolled her eyes. "Oy... spare me the act..." She then paused, raising a hoof to her chin and shrugging. "Aye... one in particular. Don' get me wrong, boyo. Never was comfortable with gettin' waited on ta begin with... but one o' the nurses 'ere... by my granddam's beard, she's got it out for me bones. Always shoutin' an' orderin' me around: 'Oy, Dancer, don't be walkin' about!' an' 'Oy, Dancer, don't be eatin' yer food too quick!' an' all that."
The injured seamare nodded to herself. "I canna' wait ta be out 'n' about without havin' ta listen to 'er nanner on in me ear anytime I'm not feedin' 'er gossip. Me only savin' grace is that she thinks I actually listen ta anythin'-"
Sporting a satisfied grin, Shawn yanked back the curtain behind him, revealing a rather portly earth pony nurse holding a thermometer and gracing a very particular patient with a very cross look.
"-she has... ta..." Wavedancer trailed off, eyes wide. The world's most awkward silence would have ensued, except that everyone could clearly hear Soft Speech's barely suppressed chortling.
With an audible crackle, the nurse bit through the thermometer in her mouth. "Oops." She exclaimed in exaggerated monotone. "I seem to have accidentally broken the oral thermometer. How silly of me... especially since all we've got left are the old rectal models. Still, we absolutely must keep careful track of that temperature. Who knows what kind of infection you might've picked up from all those horrible wounds. Be right ba~ck!"
Happy as could be, she pranced out of the room, only pausing to direct a vengeful glare in Wavedancer's direction before she slammed the door shut.
Soft Speech's chortles evolved into full blown laughter, as Wavedancer's pale expression remained riveted on the doorway.
"Anyway," Shawn continued, "I've no idea how long it's going to take them to send me back, so I guess you'll be seeing a lot of me over the next few days. Besides, I wouldn't want to leave you guys with no one to talk to. You'd get all bored and... frumpy."
Wiping a tear from her eye, Soft Speech trailed off into amused chuckling. "Soft Speech isn't much for goodbyes... but she'd certainly appreciate having someone else to talk to while she's stuck here." The minotaur paused suddenly, giving Shawn a surprisingly solemn look. "If you... if you ever get a chance to visit... you know... after they send you home..."
"I'll be sure to look you guys up." Shawn smiled. "It's not like your new place'll be easy to miss, what with all that reward money for heroic services rendered."
Soft Speech smiled sadly and waved him over, opening her arms wide. Sighing, Shawn stepped into her reach, getting swept up into a surprisingly tender hug from the berserker cow. He started to pat her back awkwardly, but a soft squeeze prompted him to return the hug in full.
After a moment, she released him. "I'll miss you, little lamb."
Shawn raised an eyebrow at her lapse, but decided to make no comment. It felt too... solemn to poke fun at.
He turned to find Wavedancer also smiling softly, her own hooves spread out. "What is it with all you guys and hugging?"
"Ponies be very touchy-feely critters," the seamare responded, then glanced over at Soft Speech. "An' softy jes' likes ye. Now get over here, ye daft monkey."
With a shrug, Shawn stepped into another, less gentle, hug. He started hugging her back, only to hear a strained voice whisper softly into his ear.
"Seriously, though... ye've got to get me outta here, boyo!"
Startled, Shawn twisted to look upon Wavedancer's face, which had a fine sheen of sweat to compliment the crazed look in her eyes.
"Tha' crazy nurse'll be back any moment... ye can come up wit' a plan real quick, righ'?" She let go, her eyes pleading with his for reprieve. Soft Speech had started laughing again.
Shawn dusted himself off as he stepped back. "Don't you worry, Dancer. I'll make sure everything gets cleared up with that nurse."
Relief washed over her features. "Thank ye, Shawnee. Ye know... for a moment I be almost sure ye would'n-"
"Tomorrow," he interrupted. "Or... maybe the day after? Honestly, I'm not sure what my schedule is. I'll have to check in with my secretary. Hey, I bet she can fit you into next week, at least!"
Wavedancer gaped at him as he literally bowed out, pausing on the other side of the door to listen.
"S-Shawnee... Shawnee ye traitor!" There was a pause. "What are ye laughin' at ye dumb cow?! Didn't ye hear the nurse? She broke the only mouth thermometer she's got! An' I ain't the only one here who be needin' 'er temperature taken!"
The laughing stopped rather suddenly, and Shawn took the opportunity to get started on his stroll back toward the main palace, whistling a cheery little tune to himself.
"Shawnee!"
"Shawn, get back here!"
Two outraged voices echoed behind him.
Tomorrow's visit'll be fun.
---------------------------------------------------------------------
Today
Shawn's thoughts of the last few weeks were derailed once again, this time by a rather strong poke to his side courtesy of a cyan hoof.
"You okay there?" Rainbow Dash asked, a merry glint in her eye at his melodramatic flinching.
Shawn shook his head, unable to hold back a smile. "Never better."
The days following their return to the castle had, if anything, gone by even faster than his initial week of near-death adventures. He'd spent most of them regaling ponies (and others) of his world and adventures. Depending on the one asking, these sessions could go on for hours.
He'd even managed to solve a few mysteries, the most serious being the disappearance of Celestia's secret stash of cake. The princess apparently took her confectionery very seriously, as Shawn had found out when he'd been rudely flung from his bed in the middle of the night by a distraught alicorn bemoaning her missing midnight snack.
She had actually followed along, looking over his shoulder the whole time, as he'd tracked down the perpetrator over the course of the night. Of course, Shawn had made sure to involve Twilight and as much of the castle staff as he could in the investigation. The princess wandering the halls searching for cake had made the headlines on some of the less reputable papers, many of the articles finding humor in the accounts that had filtered out of the palace.
He still couldn't believe how that one had turned out... or the fate of the poor sap who'd pilfered her pastry.
Another poke brought him out of his second consecutive reverie.
"You sure, dude? Because from here it looked like you might be getting a little..." She paused, hoof to her chin, as if searching for the right word.
"Distracted?" Twilight suggested.
"Emotional!" Rarity breathed, bringing both hooves up to cup her face.
"Dumber than usual."
Eyes turned to Captain Aegis, who resolutely refused to flinch at the assorted arched eyebrows and glares.
"Ooo, ooo! I love this game!" Pinkie waved her hooves, bringing everyone's attention back to her. "How about-"
"Sappy." Dash interrupted, before her friend could build up any more steam. "I was going to say sappy."
"Hey, I was going to say that! Well, I was going to say 'sad-happy', which is long for sappy, so it should totally still count as my point!"
"Pinkie," Twilight started, "that's not actually what sappy..." She paused. "You know what? I like that one. If I'm going to have to put up with the constant malapropisms from now on, I may as well not fight the ones that sound nice."
Shawn brought a hand down on her withers, the other (now lacking a cast) to his eyes. "I've never been more proud..." He choked out as he wiped at nonexistent tears.
"Yep," Applejack chortled. "Definitely sappy."
Muted musical tones reached their ears, and all turned to see Luna grinning widely, while her sister laughed openly beside her.
Shawn had expected and prepared himself for the hugs from the six Elements as he moved to the empty center of the room. Luna's, however, caught him a little by surprise.
"Are you sure you do not wish to reconsider my previous offer?" She whispered gaily. "The owner of the Corral will be very disappointed to hear you will not be staying."
"As attractive as I and that offer both are, I think I'm pretty set on the whole 'solving mysteries' gig." Shawn matched her grin, and barely had a chance to turn around before being assaulted by yet another, even larger pair of wings.
"You will be sorely missed, Shawn," Celestia spoke softly, laying her chin atop his head before gracing him with a soft smile and a brief nuzzle. Some of the other ponies shuffled uncomfortably at the casual show of familiarity from their eternally regal princess. A fact that clearly did not escape her.
"You'll get there." Shawn smiled reassuringly while patting the back of her neck. "Just wait and see."
The princess didn't respond, though neither did she release her hug for what previously would have been an uncomfortably long time. Eventually, however, even she stepped back, leaving Shawn before a semi-circle of mostly teary-eyed equines.
"Um... stay safe... please."
"We'll miss you, dude!"
"Au revoir, Mr. Spencer!"
"Come back an' visit anytime!"
"Don't forget to write! Seriously... because if you do we might think something bad happened, and then we'd have to go looking for you, which could totally result in a series of slap-stick hijinks and shenanigans that may or may not cause an interdimensional incide-!" Pinkie's tirade was cut short by a white hoof shoving itself in her mouth. Her questioning look found a shuddering, mildly horrified Rarity glaring daggers at Applejack, who whistled innocently even as she removed her own hoof from Rarity's foreleg.
"Whut? Ah did it last time, so it was your turn." Applejack stated plainly, forcing a defeated whimper from Rarity as the fashionista suppressed another shudder and turned to face Shawn again.
Shaking her head in bemusement, Twilight stepped forward. "This is all your fault, you know." Her accusing tone was belied by the bright smile on her muzzle. A smile that lost some of its shimmer as she looked him up and down and shuffled awkwardly on her hooves.
"I'll miss you too, Sparky," Shawn ventured.
The unicorn laughed, her posture becoming more relaxed. "Close... but I was actually going to say..." She paused to look up at him, grinning. "Take care of yourself, Shawn."
He started to nod, but stopped as she continued.
"You may have only been here for a few, short weeks... but many of us have grown to care deeply about you." She glanced back at Aegis, who remained expressionless. "Even if some of us won't admit it. We're going to keep working at getting a stable portal up and running on this side of things, instead of the patchwork teleport spell you'll be using now. Though... I honestly have no idea how long that'll take."
"I'll keep an eye on the news for the multicolored alien pony invasion," Shawn quipped.
"We'll make sure to ask for you!" Pinkie piped in.
This time, the rest of the ponies joined in Twilight's laughter at Shawn's mildly horrified expression. "Someday..." She continued. "That's a promise."
"And everyone knows," Shawn replied faithfully. "That breaking a promise is the fastest way to lose a friend forever."
Pinkie brought a hoof to her eyes. "I've never been more proud..." she somehow mumbled past Rarity's hoof and wiped away a nonexistent tear.
The room once again burst into soft laughter for a precious minute, before expressions turned somber once again.
"So..." Twilight chirped. "Ready to go home?"
Shawn looked around at all the friendly, if slightly long, faces that had become so familiar over the past weeks. "I'm not sure," he admitted. "But I've got friends that need me just as much back there... and that don't know where I've been all this time."
"You'll think of something to tell them, I'm sure."
"Probably the truth."
Shawn arched an eyebrow at all the startled gazes that statement drew. "What? I could lie... but it's not like they'll believe whatever I tell them anyway, so I may as well make it easier on myself and not make something up."
"That... That is the most dishonest way o' tellin' the truth Ah ever heard," Applejack stated, wide-eyed.
Dash waved her hoof in front of the now catatonic earth pony a few times. "Uhhh... I think you broke her."
"She's a strong girl." Shawn shrugged. "She'll recover."
Twilight and the princesses' horns started to glow as Shawn looked from pony to pony.
"You guys take care of yourselves, too," he shouted over the growing whine and swirl of cosmic energies. "And don't forget to smile more, Cappy!"
Captain Aegis Fidelis, stoic commander of the Canterlot Royal Guard, complied. "Good luck, Detective."
Shawn faded away, an expression of open-mouthed shock remaining as a brief afterimage in the air.
For his part, the Captain looked around at all the other wide-eyed expressions facing his way. "What? It was the only thing I could think of to say that'd let me get the last word in on that howler monkey."
To his confusion, a chorus of giggles and outright guffaws followed his cold statement. He would not find out until later that it was because, in spite of his tone or intentions, that sincere smile had persisted without his knowledge for nearly an hour afterward.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
Santa Barbara - Several weeks after Shawn's initial disappearance
Gus sat alone on the couch at the Psych office, unable to bring himself to care that his favorite suit was acquiring wrinkles faster than Shawn's cluttered mess of a desk was gathering dust.
A fading afternoon light filtered through the large, street-facing window sporting the duo's company logo, brightening the room in a fashion that was, in Gus's opinion, far too cheery for the occasion. He'd always thought that days like these were supposed to be rainy, to match the mood of the somber friends and family of the missing person, still loitering outside by the little shrine that had been erected in his memory.
It wasn't a funeral. There were no remains and he hadn't been declared dead, so Shawn could technically still be alive out there somewhere. That's what Gus told Juliet, anyway.
That's what Gus told himself.
He'd told himself that so often, he'd had to go inside and sit down to escape the noise. Now that it was quiet, however, he found himself hating the oppressive silence of the once noisy office. Of course it would be quiet... the primary noisemaker was out. Temporarily.
"Damn it, Shawn..." Gus muttered angrily at his friend's chair. "I know you're not dead, so you better get your pasty ass back here soon." He paused, head and shoulders slumping forward in defeat. "You can't be dead. You're the best friend I've ever had and... and I don't know what I'm gonna do if..." Another pause. "Please don't be dead." He glanced up at the desk one more time, almost pleading. "I miss you, Shawn. We all do."
"Aww... I missed you too, buddy."
Gus froze, afraid to look up at the familiar voice emanating from just beyond the piece of furniture he was currently staring at. Had he finally gone crazy from the lack of sleep?
Slowly, desperately, his eyes tracked to a figure dressed in tattered and mended versions of the clothes Gus had last seen him in... holding a triple-decker burger with a few messy bites taken out of it.
"S-Shawn...?" Gus muttered, rubbing at his eyes before standing up and stumbling to the nonchalant figure. "Is... is that you?"
"'Course it's me!" Shawn replied around another heavenly mouthful of fast food. "Do you know anyone else who could rock the hobo-hipster look this hard? I mean, besides late 40's Johnny Depp? Obviously, the answer is no."
After a moment's shocked consideration, Gus furiously threw his arms around his returned friend. "It is you!"
"Whoa!" Shawn croaked past Gus's death grip, trying to hug his friend back without dropping his precious, meaty cargo. "Be careful with the goods, Gus!"
Gus relinquished his grip, only to catch Shawn with a hard smack upside the head.
"Ow! Jesus!"
"Where have you been, Shawn?! And why didn't you contact anyone?! We were all worried sick about you!"
Shawn winced at the rebuke, but looked up defensively at Guster. "There weren't really any phones where I ended up."
"Okay, fine. Then why didn't you call when you got back in town?" His friend's accusing glare shifted to the burger clutched protectively in Shawn's hands. "In fact... what was the first thing you did when you got back?"
There was a guilty pause as Shawn's gaze drifted back down to the burger.
Without waiting for a response, Gus lashed out and snatched the triple-decker, stuffing a significant chunk into his mouth in a series of angry, jerky motions.
"Hey!" Shawn exclaimed half-heartedly. "Awww, come on! I haven't had one of those in weeks!" He sighed. "Maaaaan... you owe me a burger."
Gus merely glared at him sullenly as he finished the rest of his stolen meal before speaking again. "Well, you owed me lunch. I skipped mine to go to your stupid wake!"
Shawn perked up. "I got a wake? Was it nice?"
"Well... it wasn't so much a wake as a vigil. Not everyone thinks you're dead... but a lot of people do. I didn't, though. Not for a second."
Another pause. "Jules?"
"Neither did Juliet," Gus answered instantly.
Breathing a sigh of relief, Shawn smiled.
"She's super pissed at you, though."
The smile faded.
"In fact, I was starting to suspect the reason she refused to believe you died was because she couldn't fathom not getting to unleash her rage at you for making her think you did," Gus finished.
The smile died with a whimper.
"You guys were really worried, huh?" Shawn almost whispered.
Gus nodded solemnly into a short period of silence.
"Welp!" Shawn clapped his hands. "May as well get out there, then. If we hurry, I might even get to catch Lassie saying something nice about m-" He paused, a sudden thought occurring to him, to look back at Gus. "Wait... he doesn't have his gun on him, does he?"
Gus gave him a level stare back. "What do you think?"
After a moment's consideration, Shawn continued. "If we hurry, we might even get to catch my dad saying something nice about me."
With a flourish, the now-interdimensional detective waved Gus toward the door. "Ladies and human shields first!"
With a long-suffering sigh, and a hidden smile, Gus took the lead as the pair exited the office.
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YES!!!!!!!
Gonna read this later but I trust it will be an epic end.
Good job with the story by the way, one of the best I have ever read.
WOOBLEOOELALFOASKFOAOEDKAOFKEOADKO!
IT'S ALIVE!
Wait.
Now it's ended.
Fuck.
Good story. I'm sad to see it end but I'm also glade to see its has an proper ending. There so many good stores with out an ending. I wish that Shawn actually stayed in Equestria, I really like the banter between Shawn and the princesses. I hope there will be a sequel.
Finally, closure! An amazing story with everyone in complete character. Funny at some parts and drop dead hilarious at others. I'm happy to see it end, but I'm sad that it's over. Amazing job.
mylittlefacewhen.com/f/9201/ now thatn this fic is over i'm seriously crying
mylittlefacewhen.com/f/8889/
Yay! Right out of the blue.
Like how you left a possibility for a sequel. Pinkie better come looking for Shawn like she promised!
You forgot to mark the story as Complete, FYI.Mein Gott im Himmel... you finally finished...
It's been so long...
Welp, looks like I'll need to start reading from the beginning because its been soo long.
AIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEee!!!!
Great ending.
Glad you got your groove back, now wear it deeper.
3162819
When you say something like that it makes me uncomfortable to have been a proofreader for him...
I loved every second of this story! I feel you did a really good job writing Shawn and captured a lot of his craziness while at the same time making him into a believable hero (the fighting portions), I especially I loved the moments Shawn had with Celestia and Twilight. This is one of my favorite fics to read and it's sad to see it end
but every good thing must come to an end! So here's to hoping you'll write a sequel!
3162871
You have no appreciation for my subtle, demure, refined puns.
3162912
I assure you that I would... if you actually had any.
GASP EPILOGUE ONE YEAR LATER READING NOW.
---
30 minutes later
Dat feel when an awesome story ends... I have not felt it in ages...
The sadness... But happy because good story... The sappiness...
Also I absolutely loved the random "I'm not McNab! I have self-respect, you know!"
Am I following you? Hm... Not sure. But if not, I sure am now!
Aw, I wanted to see him explain the ponies to everybody. Oh well, great story anyways.
Huhmenna-wwwhhhhaaattt?
Doth mine eyes deceive me? No! They do not decieve! This story finally has ended! And what an ending it was.
Thanks for the awesome ride; hope to see more great works (and maybe a sequel) from you in the future.
Okay, maybe not. I'd still have gone for faster updates.
But better to have an update than none at all, right?
Oh come on, Laharl. You should always strive for better things! Third option: It's best to have faster updates!
... but it's over.
Sequel? Sequel's nice...
How have I not seen this before?!
Guss, stop being a gooey chocolate chip cookie!
A fine ending indeed. My only regret is that I can't recall any pineapples being referenced in the story.
THIS IS A THING?!?!?! I LOVE PSYCH!!!!! SQUEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
3163404 There was one taped to Twilight's head after a party involving hard cider.
3162955 Me too, 1216 me too.
3162931 Not really random, McNabb actually is a male stripper in the show.
3163484
how did you...?
wow good memory you have there.
I've got mixed feelings. I'm glad, because this was a superb story and it was concluded (not left unfinished to tantalize us readers with "What could have been?"), and concluded in a great, un-rushed way. On the other hand, it's finished and the adventure is over. My (metaphorical) hat's off to you, this was a great story. Not many people can nail characters', err, characterizations. Even fewer can do so with characters from two different works/universes. But you did it. I hope to hear and read more from you in the future.
Sequel! Sequel! Sequel!
3163756
Reply to my own comment; don't mind if I do.
Ponies open the portal. Some "Oh my god, Shawn wasn't lying" moments. Pre-dramatic hijinks ensue. During inter-dimensional negotiations a human diplomat is found murdered, and the evidence points to Ponies. *DUN-DUN-DUN*
sequel sequel sequel
everyone, say it with me now
sequel sequel sequel
3163787
Amen. This needs a PoE Psych crossover, now.
I friggin worship this masterpiece of a fic!!!!!!!!!!! and i REALLY loved the friendship and bonding between Shawn and Celestia, it was just so sweet.
Now i do sincerly hope that there will be a sequal.
YYYYYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSS!! I so neened this.
Bloody great story came to a bloody great end.
All this time you never updated I was happy and sad at the same time
Happy because technically the story never ended and I could keep thinking about various hilarious scenarios with Shawn still in Equestria.
Sad because I had nothing more to read in this story.
But I would be lying if I said I didn't absolutely love this story.
for this story as a whole.
fbcdn-sphotos-c-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-prn1/q71/s720x720/15985_197275990436851_430543702_n.jpg For this finally having an end.
An amazing closure for an amazing story... I wish it would never end, to be honest.
Hopefully, there'll be a sequel but until then, I'm happy that I stumbled upon this gem in the end.
Not gonna lie, the chapter feels like one of the worse ones so far. The humor and timing that I've praised again and again seems off, most of it is great but the jokes that fall flat stick out even more. Still funny but comparatively, not the best.
I still loved it and getting to see Shawn and Celestia together again is loads of fun. The closure felt great all around and the chapter did all the things a decent epilogue should.
Obligatory sequel baiting. Here's the deal. After returning to Santa Barbara all of Shawn's friends are forced to conclude he was involved in some super high government level black ops thing while missing and sworn to secrecy. Why else would he refuse to talk about what happened with anyone and stick with his ridiculous story about magic and ponies? Until BAM! Ponies in Santa Barbara. Hilarity ensues, sit back and watch while the likes, favorites, and new watchers roll on in. You're welcome.
Had a lot of fun with this story overall and I will continue recommending it to anyone who is a mild fan of ponies, Psych, and/or laughing.
3163528 Thank you, I actually only saw that episode once.
Please note that this comment stands for both my FanFiction account (Omnitrix1) and my FIMFiction account. So, with that being said, I love this story. The writing the is great, the jokes are well timed and hilarious, the plot is intriguing, the mystery's that the story employs are actually good mystery's, the characters on both sides of the crossover act very much in-character, and the conclusion was an ending that felt like it belonged to both shows. In the end, I loved this story, and I had a fun time reading it. Thanks for writing this... Also, I agree with Shawn, I would have happier without the knowledge that Ponies have their own Male Dance Clubs.
(Expect this exact same comment on FanFiction.)
3165236 3163859 3162768
This story was one of the first thing I favorite'd on this site.
This is my response after reading this chapter.
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As for sequel ideas here one the Prologue of the sequel:
We see Shawn eating ice cream walking to the Psych office then suddenly a young women with pink hair pulls him over.
Unknown Woman: Shawn! Shawn!
Shawn: [Girly scream]
Unknown Woman: Relax, Shawn. It's me. It's me! It's Pinkie.
Shawn: Impossible you should be back that Equestria.
Pinkie: Yes I know, but Princess twilight send us here...
Pinkie: We were send here from Equestria Shawn.
Shawn: Great Scott! Twilight is a princess!? Then Shawn fainted.
I can see that happening. And also I like to see Discord make appearance in the sequel.
You have no idea how incredibly, incredibly thankful I am for this epilogue. If it weren't for the epilogue, the story wouldn't have made the featured box yesterday, prompted me to read it and allowed me to read quite literally the best
crossoverfic I have ever read of all time ever. This is the pinnacle of crossover fics in my opinion. If anyone ever asks me how to make a crossover fic, I shall direct them to this one and say 'Learn from the best' Thank you so much for making this wonderful story.Hey, it's finally here! And I only had to skim Chapter 17.2 to remind myself what was going on, instead of rereading the whole thing. That's a good sign!
I will never get tired of callbacks to that joke.
3162567 Eeyup.
Also...
3163859 Sequel, sequel, sequel! Sequel, sequel, sequel! Sequel...
B-But I don't want it to end
SEQUEL
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IT'S OVER! SMASHING ENDING! YUMMY CHEESEBURGER! POSSIBLE PRINCESS SEX SCENE! ANAL THERMOMETERS! ZIPPER MOUTH! A PERFECT WAY TO END AN UNBELIEVABLY AWESOME STORY!
I rate this story
X100
100 out of 100 Scootaloos
5 out of 5 Twilights
And Deadpool's Seal of Approval
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Needs about 3-4 more chapters of Shawn-Celestia-Twilight interaction.
No, not like that, get your mind out of the gutter.
Great Ending! Great Story!
You really captured the characters really well.
This is officially my all time favorite story on FIMFICTION EVER!!!
It was good while it lasted, but, as all good things are, they must come to an end.
Good work, and keep on writing you glorious man. Or woman.
Sequel?
I could totally see this as some epic, two-part episode of Psych crossing over with My Little Pony. I like how the styles of each show are blended together. The first half is a murder mystery like Psych. The second half is a thrilling adventure story like the best episodes of My Little Pony. I think you captured Shawn's character very well. I really liked his interactions with Twilight and Pinkie Pie. Rainbow Dash too though he interacted with her significantly less. I could tell she really liked him. Also, those brief moments where he interacts with Gus are also fun too. That's the best part of Psych! I don't know why, but part of me lamented a little that Shawn wasn't transformed into a pony upon arriving in Equestria, though that would have changed how much he stood out. I don't know. Part of me would like to see this story continue just to see more of the back and forth between Shawn and Gus and Gus would interact with the ponies. Only time will tell I guess. Keep up the good work.
While it's hilarious to see the epilogue show up nearly a year late, in all seriousness the final update making the feature box is the only reason I found this brilliant story in the first place, so I can't make too much fun of you for it.
Thank you for many hours well spent.