RavensDagger
Joined 13th Dec, 2011 ·
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Nice, mysterious. More.
Coool. By the way, the ending wasn't all that dull. It just leaves so much to the imagination.
That was quite bizarre...
Not bad for it being written under an hour.
Pony CIA silencing former soldiers who know too much.
1126326
Nope.
1126338
Pony KGB ending anti-communist sentiments?
1126365
It wouldn't be much of a mystery fic if I revealed the answers in the comments.
1126370
True, you're like a magician hiding your secret.
Well.....now I'm intrigued, despite what the blog said might we get some more of this? I like it!
1133719
I wrote the second chapter on a whim... And the third is coming soon.
1135157
YAY!
I get it now
You know, that desription is on a poster at my school.
1266260
It's a quote from George Bernard Shaw's "Back to Methuselah".
Never read it, but the quote is nice.
For a fiction depicting nothing but the likes of two OCs, this is a rather interesting fic. I think I'm quite envious of your style.
Hey look it's back up. And Woohoo for Psychopath pony. Pinkamena would be proud
Also: FIRST!
I'm not entirely sure where this story is going yet, but as you said in the blog, it seems original, and original can make a great story
Hmm. Just started to read this. I have to say, I really like it.
1271552 Original is right. So far, I've never seen a real mystery story. This is really good. Unique is a way to put it. I really like this.
Not knowing anything can lead to a good story, if done well. You, sir, have done very well. Can't wait for more.
Well done author. You best keep going with this!
1313120
Thank you very much, Good Sir! I look forward to work on the rest of this!
Now this is some good stuff.
[insert Street Fighter joke here]
Mysterious and spooky. Will read tomorrow.
So it's like if the Occupy protestors were a secret, well-armed cult? I'm getting that vibe, is all.
All the same, I like me a bit of social justice. Looks good. Doubtless you know where you're going with it.
finally got into eqd, congrats! man, that's creepy.
This is good.
Still not 100% sure whats going on but am sure I'll find out later on in the story.
Epic ponie vigilantes ftw!
first!
gorgeous writing. i don't think i can wait another week :(
1327992
Ah, another week? Given the amount of long-fics I'm working on.... Give me at least three weeks. This is my least popular fic too, but it's enjoyable to write.
1328004 Darn it! Well, I definitely now what you mean. I promised a sequel for a Fluttermac I wrote a few months ago, but I didn't like writing the story in the beginning, so I've been really lazy about continuing. And I still have to do a sequel for my other story too
1328044
Unless you or your story is really, really popular, don't bother. Sequels don't work that well. Try writing something you enjoy instead.
1328004 How... How is this not popular? Gah! These ponies don't make sense. Why don't the ponies like this more!?
Amazingly done. From what I've read, all of your work is.
You've got a very interesting story going here with complex plans, and I'm a sucker for anything with em!
So... Dreamer, Planner, Executor... And a fourth one...
Hm, very mysterious. I've always been interested in these sorts of lack-of-plot-yet-very-intiguing-type stories.
For some reason, this mystery psychopath reminds me very much of Bane. I can totally imagine his voice coming from the pony.
I can't wait to find out what the plot of this is. He stole money from a bank that has been swindling country folk... and didn't kill anyone... Hm.
Man, this is great. It kinda feels the kind of thing Quentin Tarantino would film if given free-reign of the MLP franchise - specially that second chapter. I will make sure to watch this fic's progress.
You have something damned good here, and I'm even more pleased to say you are doing the right thing with it too. Looking forward to more; I know it will be excellent!
A little extra for my small list of favourites
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Thanks! I hope the next chapter will be as good!
Also, what is this thing that I'm doing right?
1419435 That thing as you call it is often known as 'je ne sais quoi' - that certain something that can't quite be named. In this particular case, I've felt that your story so far has got a good flow and delivery.
If we have a think about your story,we notice something. Imagine driving a nice car on a dead smooth multilane blacktop for 100kph through great scenery, nice, isn't it? Now imagine the same trip, except the road is now one of the typical goat track roads such as I have here in New Zealand, and every 2km we get pulled over by the police and hassled for no apparent reason, yet we also see that the scenery is nice enough to try and battle on, so we carry on our trip anyhow.
So many stories I see here are the second car trip - the idea (our scenery) is great, but the delivery (our car ride) is not so good. Stilted dialogue, improbable out of character behaviour, ah, it goes on and on. Well your story to me is the first car ride. The scenery/idea is great, and the trip/delivery is smooth, bump free and is easy to transition between events.
Anyhow the rambling point I want to make is that I am glad you have done a nice job on delivery. Even a boring story is made pleasant in the telling when done properly, but you have kindly used a fantastic plot which means the fun has been doubled!
Wow that was hard to write on this damned tablet, the cursor goes psychotic and letters go everywhere when commenting on fimfiction, I hope my comment is well received as it took me forever
1422056
It is most certainly well received, and I appreciate the illustration, I'm working on a bumpy road story at this moment...
This is up there, dude. And it's way cooler than Atlas Shrugged or The Fountainhead. But I'd have to say that's more due to the fact that you're a much better author than Ayn Rand.
Ah, yes! Finally, we get the full plot of this mystery story! One bit of this canon you've created I liked in particular:
-The Princesses have nothing to do with this, nor do any of those who are just and right. We’re only targeting the bad ponies, those that deserve to be punished.
I'm glad this didn't turn out to be one of those fics with Tyrant Celestia or something equally ridiculous that prevents me from being able to take it seriously. Good job!
As far as how this turned out, it's been another great chapter! This is seriously one of my favorite fics right now. It's right up there with stories like Background Pony and The Flight of The Alicorn. It's dark and mysterious without feeling too over-the-top for Equestria.
1456389
/thank you! That mood was what I was going for.
I like this darker, mafia/corrupt style of setting.
Do you plan this to be a shorter story or something longer? 'Caus I feel that right about now Celestia should be sending in a certain squad of six ponies to deal with this threat...
Also, is that book of yours out yet?
1459262
That book... not really.
And this should be shorter, around ten chapters or so.
1459295
That sounds like both a good and a bad thing (since I already have so many stories to catch up on.)
Which of your stories do you recommend I should start reading?
1459858
Well, my most popular ones are Of Steam Gears and Wings and Of Challenges and Kisses, both of them have nothing to do with this. There's also Of Journals, that one's kinda cool.
Oh, and a bunch of one shots.
I think I'll take steampunk for 100 ponies. It's on my to-read list, anyways.